Three Tales Out of Time
slap up meal at our expense and that Jill and her would be extremely grateful if we would order a table.
While still at the bar Sean asked about the girl we seen. The bar tender who was clean shaven save for two great side whiskers no doubt styled to aid drinking the local elixir said he wasn't aware of anybody then pointed to an old chap by the fireplace who looked like his dad.
We walked over to him and asked if he knew about the girl. He didn't seem to forthcoming then noticing his pint was nearly empty I offered to buy him another one. For some not surprising reason he perked up a bit.
"Thanks." Taking a good quantity of the glass in one gulp "All I know is it could have been a ghost of the girl found here."
We all crowded round to listen. For there is nothing like being told a good ghost story in small hamlet miles from nowhere and before a long walk home in the dark.
"Why do you think that?" Said Sean encourage him for he thought the English always needed help in embellishing to make a good story.
"Eh. Oh. It was in the 70's and workmen were digging up the floor just where you're standing darlin' to fit a new drain."
He pointed to where Elizabeth was who immediately let out a gasp and jumped about two foot back. Seeing his performance was going better than expected he continued.
"When they got down about three feet they found a skeleton of girl. Cor! There was ructions, police an’ all. But they got the county alchohologist to 'ave a look at 'er and found she was about hundred years old."
"What happened to her?"
"They buried her in the church next door. Gave her a good funeral.”
"No I mean what happened to her to be where she was?"
"Dunno. Expect it was one of them squire's at the Manner knocked up a maid and got rid of her before the missus found out"
"Have you seen her?" Sean asked mischievously. The old man looked up.
"She's about sometimes" he said slowly looking at the fire. "Everyone calls her Adelle. Bye the bye youse the ones staying up the Manner?"
"Yes why?"
His eyes lit up. I could see his evening was going well.
"I've heard people staying there hear strange noises at night."
Oh dear it was time to feed the grockles some good scary stories.
"What sort of noises" I said.
"Nothing much. Last people said it's like scratching or knocking coming from behind the walls."
"Well we were there last night and heard nothing.”
"Expect they like to let you settle in first."
He was certainly playing it well. He looked at his now empty glass and then at me.
"I could tell you more if you like?"
I was half a mind to buy him another pint when the waiter interrupted us and said our table was ready.
E.
It was a most enjoyable evening and after wine and beer Jill and I began to regard the previous night's escapade as an almost an enjoyable caper.
The only disappointment for Sean and James was they were unable to reach the middle of the line of barrels before the bar closed for the night but they promised the publican faithfully they would return the following evening and complete their mission. Normally on a dark evening one expects to be escorted home safely by a gentleman but on this evening we decided that if we ever going to reach the house and also not fall in the stream it was thought best if Jill and I firmly held and escorted the gentlemen. To thank us on this promenade our menfolk decided to provided us with entertainment in the form of two or three ribald songs which the contents I will not record here. Suffice to say they mainly involved the exploits of an Eskimo called Nell and her prodigious bedroom antics.
We eventually got them into to bed and despite the ghost stories we heard nothing that night.
J.
After another excellent day in which we found doing what we were told worked to great advantage Sean and I thought that we would give the girls a treat by cooking for them. We got the biggest pot we could find and made stew and dumpling accompanied by some reasonably expensive wine.
This went down well and I think we were sufficiently forgiven for the camping incident.
As we sat back complimenting each other on what perfect couples we were and how unlucky everyone else was not knowing us a strange scratching sound came from the wall behind Elizabeth.
E.
As I sat back at the dining table rather full from taking to many dumplings and enjoying what I regarded was quite a good wine by James standards I heard behind me above the fire place a strange rustling sound. It was like someone or something scratching or scraping behind the wall. I noticed the others had sat up and we're looking behind me. I turned round slowly. The wine and food had dulled my senses a little but not sufficiently to stop the fear bubbling up inside me for the noise was getting louder and nearer. Then suddenly there was a great commotion coming from the chimney. Dust, soot and blackened rubbish fell into the grate. Then a pigeon.
"My God it's a pigeon! Oh god a bird in the house. Help me!" Shouted James and curled up in a ball in the floor.
"What's the matter James?" I cried.
"He has a pathological fear of flying birds in a house.” Said Jill.
Sean walked over to it and gave it a kick.
"Sean don't! It must have got stuck in the chimney poor thing."
"Well it's dead now.”
After a few moments we calmed down and James uncurled himself. But just as we thought we could relax the scrapping started again. An uncontrollable shiver ran up my spine and I flung myself at James wrapping my arms tightly around him. Then more soot fell into the grate followed by the BIGGEST rat I ever seen!
Pandemonium! All four of us were up on the table in an instant. Both Jill and I holding our skirts tightly about our knees and our menfolk I was disappointed to find were holding us in a way which suggested they were using us for protection. What a tableau this would have presented to any one passing the window. Round the room it scurried. Then it jumped on a chair stood on its hind legs and looked straight at us before leaping between Sean's legs creating screams which must have been heard in the Inn.
"What are we going to do James?"
J.
A bird in the house and I will die on the spot but a rat is just a large mouse. Letting go of Elizabeth I jumped down and opened the kitchen door and then the back door. It shot out the house like hell was following it. When I returned I was the hero of the moment.
"Oh James what bravery" was the unanimous response from the girls. But just as I was contemplating what just rewards I deserved for this Sean ruined my moment. "Where's the pigeon?"
The brief sense of bravery dissipated instantly to be replaced by panic. The grate was empty! I looked around the room and to my horror found it staring at me from the curtain rail very much alive and giving me the distinct impression I had put it in the chimney.
Before I could shout it flew straight over me causing me to duck and bang my head on the table before flying off round the room while I flew out the door.
E.
I found James under the bed clothes. I pulled back the covers to find him curled with his eyes shut tight.
"Has it gone Elizabeth?"
I noticed a nice bruise was forming on his forehead but felt it best not to draw attention to it. He took a little convincing but eventually he believe that the bird was out the house thanks to Jill who had grabbed it and carried it out to the back door.
I undressed and climbed into bed with him.
"You know James I think I have had enough holiday. Can we go home tomorrow?"
J.
The next morning when we eventually gathered our wits we decided that the pleasant and tranquil coast of Cornwall was not for us and left as quickly as we could. If you ever come across the person who wrote the nice promotional holiday brochure for the River Camel and its surround please let me know his name and address.
END
Other ebooks by this Author
Out of Time.
/>
My first ebook on the Urquhart Bicester Time Travel Diaries.
Synopsis
It's 2015 and the Martians are about to invade Earth. They have hacked into the Earth's social media companies and absorbed them into the media site ComsMesh to manipulate the human race and weaken its defences. Up to now no one on Earth suspects a thing.
Then, one of ComsMesh staff finds the 2015 diary of a James Urquhart, and the 1873 diary of Elizabeth Bicester bound together in a copper chest and concludes they are actually time travellers. He flags this up to his director as he believes such technology in the wrong hands could reveal his Company's plans to socially engineer the world.
So here are the diaries of the adventures of James Urquhart, minor science lecturer and sometime rambler, living in 2015 and Elizabeth Bicester, lady of leisure, of Hamgreen Lodge whom he stumbles upon at a cricket match in 1873. Despite much banter regarding each other’s etiquette and manners it seems they manage (through incredible feats of illogical deduction, with not a little help from James Maxwell, H. G. Wells and some strange time devices) to save the world!
A Drift Out of Time.
My second ebook on the Urquhart Bicester Time Travel Diaries.
Synopsis
The diaries of James Urquhart, living in 2015 and Elizabeth Bicester from 1873 continue. After stopping a Martian invasion of Earth and ruining the Weber Institute plan to take over the world, James and Elizabeth have returned home for a bit of peace and quiet to find they are not only in a different future but a different aspect of themselves. Moreover the Martians are still trying to colonise Earth after