Awake

  Where was he? Gulping as my stomach churned with petrified nerves, I glanced around, still trying to make it look like I was just moving to get more comfortable and flattening the floating skirt of the dress.

  When their chant felt like it'd entered the third minute, I started to panic. I didn't know how many more opportunities I was going to get to escape. My hands shook, and I felt like crying. I clenched my trembling lip.

  Run now.

  I should just go now. This was my last chance and Noah wasn't here. I officially had nothing to lose. Just when I was about to go it alone, I heard him. His voice was like an answered prayer.

  Looking over my shoulder, I twisted my body in the direction of his voice. It took a minute but after another whisper and rustling of a bush I saw him.

  "Now!" he hissed.

  I took off, wading through the water as fast as I could. It was difficult, and I burst into tears as the water fought against me, determined to keep me there. I pushed myself harder, and it was when the water reached the bottom of my knees that I heard shouting. Noah stood up, dashing forwards with his hand outstretched.

  I whimpered, terrified that they would catch me up. We were stupid; they were going to get us. It felt like ages before I was out and Noah was tugging me forwards. My ankle length dress weighed a ton, and I was instantly freezing as the wind nipped at my skin. But none of that mattered because I was free and had a chance.

  "Faster, Scarlett," Noah snapped.

  They were behind us, but there was no way I was turning around to see how far. Their footsteps and voices were quiet so hopefully we still had a good head start. Noah didn't seem to care about where they were; he ran with sheer determination, half dragging me behind him.

  Loose branches snapped under my bare feet, and I knew it was only a matter of time before they broke my skin. I pushed myself, ignoring the burn as my calf muscles screamed in protest. There was no time to care about anything but reaching safety.

  "How far behind us do you think they are?" I asked, holding onto his hand so tight I could feel myself crushing his bones together.

  There were so many of them and just two of us. They're going to catch us! My heart hurt as it beat too fast, too hard. Adrenaline and fear coursed through my veins.

  They couldn't be too far back.

  Oh God, oh God, they're going to catch us, and I'm going to die.

  I tensed as much as I could, terrified that I'd feel a hand grip my shoulder at any second.

  I wanted to be home.

  "Probably not far, keep going." He didn't sound as out of breath as me but he was close, and it had only been a few minutes.

  Five minutes in, and I was completely overwhelmed and exhausted. I felt tears stab my eyes like I was being prickled with hundred of needles. My vision blurred. My side stung, lungs burned, legs hurt, feet throbbed and I was chilled to the bone, but the worst part was the fear of being chased down, caught and taken back.

  "You okay?" he puffed after we'd run another ten or fifteen minutes, going deeper into the woods.

  I blinked rapidly and replied, "Yeah." Not seeing wasn't helping with the panic but it was dark under the trees anyway and we were running fast, so there wasn't a lot to see. "We're going to be okay, aren't we?" I asked, wheezing.

  I'd forgotten how my PE teacher had told me to breathe when running. It was either breathe in through your nose and out with your mouth or the other way around. I tried both, and my lungs and throat still burned.

  Everything burned and ached.

  "We'll be fine, don't slow down."

  Not once while we were sprinting towards the unknown did he let go of my hand. He would never know how much I appreciated that. I forgave him, right then and there, while he risked everything and turned his back on all he'd ever known to save my life.

  I forgave him.

  One agonising hour later, I couldn't do it anymore. "Noah, I need a break," I said, doubling over. I gagged. He stopped immediately and dropped to his knees as I slumped to the floor. My legs were now completely unable to support my weight. We'd been slowing for some time now, but I'd run faster and for longer than I ever had before.

  "I'm sorry, but I can't." Red spots danced in front of my face and felt like I was going to be sick.

  "Okay, we'll take two." He tugged open the backpack. He pulled out two bottles of water and a pair of socks and trainers. We downed the water, breathing heavily between long swigs, and I put on the shoes. My feet were swollen and sore, but it felt good to have some protection again. Noah winced as he saw the blood seeping from my feet, instantly turning patches of the white socks red.

  "Sorry," I said. We need to go. We can't stop.

  "Don't. You have nothing to be sorry for, I should've made you put them on sooner, but we really didn't have time."

  "It's not your fault. We couldn't stop too soon. Cut feet is a small price to pay for my life."

  He stroked my hair and tucked it behind my ear like he had dozens of times before. I wanted to close my eyes at the contact. It still felt so real and so natural. He sighed. "We have to get up, Scarlett; we need to keep moving. They would've closed the gap considerably by now."

  His words made me get up. I didn't want to, the thought of moving even an inch brought me to tears, but I didn't have a choice. Stuffing the empty bottles back in the bag, he stood and helped me up. My legs almost gave out again.

  Clenching my teeth, I breathed through the throbbing pain. "Do you know where we're going?" I bit out.

  "I know a general direction, but I've not been this deep into the forest before. There are miles before the nearest town - it's the reason Donald bought the land."

  Great, we were going in a 'general' direction, and I couldn't complain or let myself get disheartened. I had less of an idea than he did. We were in this together, and we'd find a way out together.

  "Let's go then," I said, looking back to check if anyone was coming. I wasn't nearly ready to run again, but then I wasn't nearly ready to die, so I had no choice.

  Noah threw the bag on his back and held his hand out. I took it without hesitation, and we started off in the direction we were headed before. The first few steps were the hardest, my muscles had seized from our few short minutes stop, but I ignored the pain.

  The stitch in my side slowed us down considerably. Sweat dampened my clothes; I swallowed metallic bile from over-exerting myself, and exhaustion threatened to collapse my legs again. But we pushed on, much, much slower than before but still heading away from Eternal Light.

  "Your parents are in Ireland, you know," he said.

  My heart ached to be reunited with them. "How do you know that?"

  "It's all over the news. My dad drove the car eighty miles to try to put the police off, make it look like we were heading to an airport but they quickly realised. Your parents are here."

  It was a huge comfort knowing they were in the same country. I didn't have time to dwell on the fact that they'd probably told the truth about who we all were and why they'd taken me because Noah upped the pace and had us sprinting through the forest again. The thought of getting to safety and telling everyone that my parents were heroes for taking me that day gave me the added boost I needed.

  After weaving between tall trees and jumping a few fallen ones, Noah pulled us to an abrupt stop and slapped his hand over my mouth. My eyes widened. What could he hear? I swallowed glass and pressed my body into his side. They were close, close enough for Noah to hear them so that meant there was a strong possibility that they'd heard us.

  They're going to find us.

  "Noah," I whispered behind his palm, trembling with fear.

  He mouthed 'it's okay' and led us to one of the fallen trees. We were going to have to hide.

  Bloody hell, we're going to be caught!

  We made it behind the large tree before the footsteps and voices got too loud. Noah had me pinned to his chest. We both tried to control our breathing, so we were barely making a noise. Both of my hands covere
d my mouth, and I forced myself to suck air in slowly and quietly.

  My heart thumped hard when they sounded practically on top of us. Their feet broke sticks and squelched damp moss. They had to be right next to us. I closed my eyes and prayed, pushing back into Noah, trying to melt into his body.

  I was so, so scared.

  "Where would he take her?" Donald seethed.

  "I don't know," Shaun replied, sounding just as angry with his son. "We will find them both, though. Noah doesn't know this forest as well as he obviously thinks. We'll pick them up soon."

  Noah's arms tightened around me, and he buried his head in my hair. What was he thinking? I'd not been around them long, but they'd always spoken to each other and about each other with respect. When Noah was telling me he wanted to get me out he still never spoke ill about his community. It had to hurt that they could speak about him with such hate in their tone.

  Despite what he'd done, I wanted to comfort him. I hated that he could be in pain, and I wanted to fix it. I loved him completely, whether he was an ex-cult member or not. I loved who I thought he was, and I adored that he'd grown into that person again.

  We didn't move for a long time, clinging to each other, and my body started to seize up. I wanted to question him on when we were leaving, what he was thinking, and ask if he was okay but fear prevented me.

  "Ready," he said, after a few more agonising minutes. He still held onto me tight, and part of me wanted to stay hidden. There was less risk. We had to keep moving, though.

  "Which way?" I asked.

  He did another scan of the area and stood up, taking my hand. "Not the direction they went in, we'll go further west."

  I had no idea how he knew which way was west, but I gripped his hand and ran beside him.

  Noah

  I WAS EXHAUSTED. Completely and utterly exhausted. Sweat ran down my forehead, and my lungs burned. Scarlett was tired, too, but we still kept moving. Before they'd caught up with us, I knew the direction we were going but now we could be heading back to the commune for all I knew.

  I didn't tell Scarlett because it'd only panic her more. I'd never seen a person to terrified before and I wanted to do everything I could to make it better for her.

  "Noah," she said through ragged, struggling breaths.

  We'd slowed down a lot, going at a pace somewhere between a walk and a jog. The sun was beginning to set, slowly descending the forest into darkness. Soon we would lose all light, and the temperature would drop dramatically.

  "I know," I replied, pulling her to a stop. Her legs buckled, and she fell to the floor as soon as I stopped her, and I doubled over, leaning against a tree.

  "What're we going to do?" she asked.

  It was all on me, but then it was my fault for promising to get her out. "Right now we should concentrate on finding shelter. I've seen a few dirt roads, and I know there are houses in the forest. Rather than trying to find town, I think we should find somewhere to stay the night and head back out at first light."

  Her dark blue, fear filled eyes widened. "Isn't that dangerous? What if they come for us?"

  That I wasn't sure of. Eternal Light usually avoided outside interaction at all cost, we didn't want to be known and knocking at someone's door asking for two runaway teens wouldn't help. But they had nothing to lose now so I wasn't sure if they'd go for it or lay low and try to find us alone.

  At this point, it was anyone's guess.

  "We have to be smart about this, as soon as that sun's gone it's going to get really cold, add complete darkness to that and it's not looking good for us. We'll find somewhere to stay the night. I think someone's house is the best bet. I have a story."

  "You really think that'll work?"

  I stood up straight and scrubbed my face with my hands. "I don't know, Scarlett. It's all I have right now. I wish I could wave a magic wand and get us out of this, but I can't."

  "It's okay," she said softly. "I know you're doing all you can, and I understand what you're risking."

  "Come on, let's keep moving." I helped her up, and we jogged for what seemed like hours before finally came across an old bike and gardening tools.

  Scarlett looked at me, afraid. "Whose do you think those are?" she asked.

  "I don't know, but it probably means we have stumbled onto private property, and a house is nearby. This is good." Finally.

  "Is it good? We don't know who is going to be there."

  "It will be fine, Scarlett. No one can be as dangerous to us as them right now. You know that we have no choice."

  She nodded. "I'm with you. Can we just walk now, no running? I feel like I'm going to collapse again."

  "Yes, let's take two minutes first so you can get finally changed now we're further away. We don't want this to look any more suspicious than it already does." I dropped the bag, and she bent down, taking the clothes out of it. I had a pair of jeans and t-shirt, but it was better than the dress. "Put the fleece on, too, you're freezing."

  I could just about see her rosy cheeks with the last of the light. But that didn't fool me, she was cold to touch, and we'd been slowly losing pace for the last couple of hours. I slipped mine on as well and turned around, giving her some privacy even though I'd seen her naked before.

  It only took her a minute to get changed, probably because she was cold. "I'm done, Noah," she said. I turned back to see her shoving the dress in the bag and gripping the front of the fleece against her in a bid to warm up quicker. "We should take this, so they don't find it and know we've been here, right?"

  I smiled and took the bag. "Yes, good thinking."

  When I stood up from bending down to get the bag we were closer than before. I could smell her hair, her skin, and it drove me crazy. I missed her so much. Everything was entirely my fault, I'd lost the best thing that had ever happened to me, and I had no one to blame but myself.

  Her eyes locked me in, preventing me from moving or even speaking. She was so beautiful, inside and out. "Noah," she whispered and the softness in her voice made me ache. Even if it was only for a moment, she remembered how we were, how she loved me. It might not be much, but that tender look was enough for me. I didn't deserve more. I didn't even deserve that.

  "I know," I replied. "Let's try to find this house."

  She stepped back first and the warmth I felt when I was near her subsided. I put my hand on the small of her back to guide her in what I hoped was the right direction. I didn't need to but the urge to have some physical contact with her was overwhelming.

  She tried not to look at me when I touched her, but I caught the glance in my direction. I took it as a good sign that she didn't push me away. We only had each other right now, but I desperately wanted her to, at the very least, not hate me.

  "Are you feeling warmer?" I asked as we power-walked ahead, being careful to watch the ground as well as the surroundings since we couldn't see that well anymore.

  "Yeah, thank you."

  "Sorry we couldn't have stopped for you to change earlier."

  "It's okay, I wasn't that cold back then anyway. Not sure if it was because it was warmer or if the shock has just worn off now."

  "You're not going to faint on me, are you?"

  She smiled, looking out into the distance and then in front of her feet. "No, I'm pretty sure I'm saving that for when we get to town."

  "Noted," I replied. "I'll remember that for when we step into the police station."

  "That's where were going first?"

  "Of course."

  "You're really turning them in?" she asked, genuinely surprised. I could just take her home, let her parents run away with her and go somewhere myself, but I would never do that. Eternal Light were dangerous and had to be stopped. Besides, the police were looking for her. Jonathan and Marissa weren't the type of people to think of themselves first, they would tell the truth and get themselves into trouble to save their daughter.

  I pulled her to a stop and spun her around. "I understand that I have no right t
o ask anything of you, but I need you to believe me when I tell you I love you. They would have killed you, Scarlett, and I have never felt fear like that. I felt physically sick from the moment I woke, worrying that something would go wrong with the escape. Nothing matters but you and maybe I'm blinded, but I don't care. Bottom line is you come first, and there's not one person in this world I wouldn't betray to keep you safe. So, yeah, I'm really turning them in. I'm keeping you safe."

  She looked like she was going to cry in a good way. I loved that I could still affect her.

  "We need to keep moving. They could be anywhere," I said. There was a dirt track road to our left, so it had to lead somewhere. I led her down it and prayed somewhere safe was at the end.

  Ten minutes later, we found a small cottage. An old Ford Mondeo was parked outside. Eternal Light had 4-wheeled drives because of how deep into the forest we lived. I was confident we'd be safe here.

  Scarlett's hand slipped into mine, and she squeezed. She was afraid.

  "It's alright. Just let me do the talking."

  With a little nod she replied, "Okay."

  I hated the next words out of my mouth; "We can't be holding hands for this. I'm going to tell them you're my sister."

  She let go, and I wanted to punch myself. That may well be the last time I'd get to hold her hand. I shouldn't have said anything until we were closer. I needed more time.

  "What will you tell them?"

  "We've lost our camp."

  Frowning adorably, she said, "Huh?"

  "Don't worry, just follow my lead," I said, knocking on the faded red door. When it opened an elderly man smiled at us. "Hello, my name is Jacob, and this is my sister, Amelia, we got lost in the woods with the loss of light and wondered if we could stay until morning, please? We won't be any trouble, but we're cold and need a floor to sleep on."

  "You're lost? Where are you parents?" he asked.

  "We know our way around here but ventured further than usual, and I would prefer not to have my sister walking through the woods in the dark. And our parents will be at home drunk, sir. We camp out a lot, they know about it. I'm eighteen, old enough to take care of us both, but right now I just need a little help."