Born of Defiance

  He swallowed his bite of egg. "I get up at five, run ten miles. Shower. Have to make check-in by seven. The armada owns my worthless ass until nineteen hundred. Sometimes later. Grab a quick bite. Then I spend three to four hours in the gym at night, training. I usually have two evenings off from double-duty and practice, but the weekends are full training days or matches or maneuvers."

  Gah, she couldn't imagine such a grueling, unforgiving schedule. How did he stay sane? "What do you do for fun?"

  "Climb."

  "And when do you get to climb?"

  He ate a bite of rice. "Ground maneuvers, rescue and survival training, every couple of months. Then, once a year, during my liberty week."

  "And?" she prompted.

  "And what?"

  "What else do you enjoy?"

  "Sleep."

  "Talyn, I'm serious."

  "As am I. Why do you think I want a command position so badly? They'd drop my hours down to only ten hours a day, four days a week. And I'd get two weeks of liberty a year. Best of all, I'd have a later curfew. And I'd get one night a week without one."

  Never had she been happier that her own half-Vest status had kept her out of the military.

  "Have you ever thought about a career outside of the armada?"

  He swallowed the fruit and reached for more. "I wanted to be a surgeon."

  "Why didn't you go to med school?"

  "Couldn't get in with my classification. Without a paternal lineage, no Andarion school would even accept my application."

  "No one?"

  He shook his head. "Believe me, I tried. I even applied to The League medical corps. They turned me down, too. Since they have so few Andarions in their service and the humans don't like for us to treat them, they said they didn't have any open slots for our kind. I applied three times, and with the third one, they sent notice that I wasn't going to get in, so I shouldn't waste time or money applying again."

  That had to be hard for him. "I'm sorry, Talyn."

  He shrugged with a nonchalance she was sure he didn't really feel. How could he? Anyone who'd kept trying after being turned down that many times must have really wanted it.

  "I got over it."

  His tone said he was being honest, but she saw the regret in his eyes. The quiet, tormented resignation.

  Her heart breaking for him, she watched as he finished off his bland lunch that was forced on him by his limited career options. Options he didn't bitch about, but he had every right to.

  "So what about you?" he asked, leaning back in his chair.

  She wiped her lips. "What about me?"

  "What are you studying?"

  "Ironically, I'm in med school. Entering my second year. I just passed my PT licensing exams a month ago."

  "Congratulations."

  She was stunned by his sincerity. Especially since it was something he'd wanted to do and had been denied the opportunity. "Thank you. And by the way, I really appreciate your understanding about my class schedule." He could have been a real pain over it. All the others had been. Some were even blatantly rude--wanting to know why a whore had to go to school with decent Andarions.

  Instead, Talyn had been more than accommodating, which was one of the primary reasons she'd considered him as her patron.

  "I respect anyone who goes to university. My mom had a hard time going with me when I was a kid. It took her twice as long to graduate as it should have. If you need anything extra for class, just let me know. I don't want you to have to struggle like my mother did." He paid for their food while she finished eating.

  His armband went off.

  Silencing it, he rose to his feet. "I have to get back for check-in."

  "I thought you had an hour and a half for lunch?"

  "My CO shortens it sometimes." Now, she heard the defiant anger underlying his words.

  Yeah, there was no missing the furious tic in his jaw or the flashing bloodlust in his white eyes. He wanted his CO's throat. But he didn't say a word about it as he led her back to his airbike.

  She returned to base with him. "Would you mind if I went to your match tomorrow?"

  His expression was a mask of shocked incredulity. "Really?"

  She nodded. "Your mom won't mind, will she?"

  He scowled as if her question baffled him. "My mom?"

  "That you have your companion at a fight with her?"

  "Oh ... No, my mother never attends my fights."

  Again, she was shocked by his answer. How could a champion fighter's mother not attend his events? "Never?"

  He shook his head as if it was totally normal. "She doesn't like to see me bleed." His mood lightened a bit as he winked at her. "What kind of selfish mom is she, right?"

  She laughed at his warped humor. "So who goes for you?"

  "My trainer and manager."

  "And?" she asked.

  "My trainer and manager." He said that so emotionlessly that she knew he didn't expect anyone else. The loneliness of his life made her ache. He truly had no one. No wonder he didn't treat her like other patrons treated their companions. He had no real understanding of Andarion relationships.

  Or even family, it seemed.

  Felicia pulled his head down until his forehead touched hers. "I will be there for you, Talyn."

  He inclined his head respectfully to her. "I shall leave a family pass for you at the box office. It'll get you in the back with me, before and after the fight." He cupped her face in his hand. "May I kiss you?"

  "Of course."

  He brushed his hand through her curls before he slowly lowered his lips to hers.

  Felicia trembled at the gentleness of his kiss. She shivered as his tongue swept against hers. When he pulled back, she smiled up at him. "I'm glad you're my first kiss."

  "And I'm glad you're mine."

  It wasn't until he'd walked away that she realized he meant that she was his first kiss, too. Not that she was his mistress. Warmth spread through her, even though a part of her was still a little scared of him. He was so much more than she'd ever hoped to find.

  Like him, because of her parents' actions, she had limited options for a spouse and career. The only reason she'd been allowed into med school was because her mother was a distant cousin to the former tadar, and her father was a very high-ranking advisor to the current tadara, and while her parents were unmarried, her father did acknowledge her as his.

  At least on occasion.

  That allowed her many more options for careers, but it put her at an extreme disadvantage when negotiating marriage. It was why she'd followed her mother into companionship. At least as a companion, she had some control over her future.

  Normally, companions were sought by older males whose wives had died or were injured, and they didn't want to damage or complicate the lineages of their existing children with a new marriage.

  Or they wanted companions for things, usually perverse, their wives refused to do for them. Sadly, those males treated their companions like paid whores. Expected them to be at their beck and call, and completely subservient and submissive.

  Physical and verbal abuse had been her worst fear. She'd grown up with horror stories from her mother and her mother's friends.

  But as the cost for school had risen, and the reality set in that no decent male her age would ever do right by her, she'd finally accepted the inevitable.

  And almost made the worst mistake imaginable. She still shivered as she remembered the male she'd interviewed with right before Talyn. On paper, Arux had appeared the most perfect patron imaginable. She'd thought him a dream come true.

  But he'd been so demanding and rude to her when they met that she'd started to pass on Talyn's proposal without even reviewing it. If an elder male was so condescending and repulsive, she'd imagined that a younger male, who had options for a wife, would be twice as bad.

  She couldn't have been more wrong.

  And for the first time in her life, she was actually looking forward to losing her virginit
y.

  *

  "Batur! Point twelve! Now!"

  Talyn bit back an insult at his CO's sharp bark as he ran to fall in line. He really hated the bastard. As an Anatole, his CO was the grandnephew of their tadara, and he thought he owned the entire armada.

  "Sir, yes sir." He saluted Anatole and took position in front of him.

  The colonel glanced to where Felicia had just vanished. "So who's the trim?"

  Talyn ground his teeth at the derogatory term that reduced Felicia to nothing more than mindless arm candy. "My female, sir."

  He moved to stand right in Talyn's face. "Bullshit. No self-respecting female would be seen in public with a mongrel dog like you. Did you bring a whore on base, Batur?"

  "No, sir."

  The colonel sneered at him. "You did, didn't you? What? Did you have her suck you off for lunch?"

  His breathing ragged, Talyn had to force himself not to strike the bastard. It wouldn't just be a court-martial. Anatole was a direct member of the royal house ... fifth in line to the throne.

  Death sentence.

  But it was so tempting right now. He could actually taste Anatole's blood on his face as he ripped out the bastard's carotid. He physically ached to do it.

  Ferrick would be so happy to know that he really did have these fantasies.

  "Why don't you call your female back for me and let me show her what it's like to screw a real male? One with lineage."

  Talyn clenched his fists at his side. No other officer would have to tolerate this from the colonel. But he had no one to appeal to. If he tried to report Anatole, it would only get worse for him.

  Or, worst case scenario, it might rebound and harm his mother and her rank.

  "What? Does that make you angry, mongrel? You dare look at me with rage in your eyes?"

  Talyn quickly averted his gaze.

  "Go on, dog. Call your whore. I'll even let you watch her suck my dick."

  When he didn't pull his link out, the colonel arched a brow. "Are you refusing a direct order?"

  "I can't order a civ, sir. If you want your cock sucked, guess I'll have to do it."

  The colonel backhanded him.

  Talyn didn't budge. Honestly? His mother hit harder.

  What it did do, though, was make him yearn for the day Anatole's testicles descended and the bastard found enough backbone to face him like a true Andarion.

  In the Ring.

  Warrior to warrior.

  "You think you're something special? Iron Hammer," he sneered. "I've got a year's salary riding on your opponent tomorrow night. What say we start your training early? Huh? Let's get you seasoned for your opponent. Report to the Ring. Immediately."

  "Yes, sir. Looking forward to the day when you're Andarion enough to join me there."

  That had the desired effect. Anatole's eyes flared with hatred. "Insubordination, Major?"

  You think? But Talyn wasn't quite stupid enough to say that out loud. "No, sir. Just thinking that it might do the morale good to see one of our leaders in the Ring." Talyn saluted him and headed for the company gym. And with every step he took, he knew what would be waiting.

  What forever waited for him there.

  Because the odds were with Talyn winning, Anatole always bet against him, hoping for a bigger payout. But Talyn couldn't throw a fight. It would literally mean his life if he did.

  So the colonel handicapped him. Or so he thought.

  What the idiot couldn't figure out was that these meager little fights didn't hurt Talyn.

  At all.

  Andarion soldiers, while fierce, were not the same caliber as a pro Ring fighter. Vested brats, they'd never had to walk into an Open Ring and really fight for their lives. Never had to stand strong in a world determined to kill them.

  Long ago, Talyn had learned to find pleasure in pain. And in true Andarion War Hauk fashion, fights invigorated him. Made him stronger. More determined. Nothing lit a fire in his ass quicker than someone trying to hold him back or beat him down.

  Bring it with everything you have, bitch.

  Nothing and no one would ever get the best of him.

  As he went to dress out, his thoughts turned to Felicia and her gentle kindness during lunch.

  She wanted to see him again. That thought warmed him in spite of his foul mood.

  While he had a warrior's heart, she did bring an unfathomable peace to his soul. If he had to get his ass kicked, he couldn't think of a better reason than to protect her from bastards like his CO.

  Best of all, she didn't appear to look at him like other Andarions did. Sometimes, she even seemed to enjoy his company. That was all he wanted in this life. Someone who could be with him and not resent or hate him for a birth he couldn't help.

  But first he had to deal with Anatole and whatever Vested moron thought he could beat down the Iron Hammer.

  Irritated by the bullshit, Talyn ground his teeth. Yes, he'd changed one thing in his life by bringing Felicia into it. But so far, everything else he'd tried had failed.

  There has to be another way out of this.

  Some way to get Anatole and the rest of them off his back. Yeah, kill the bastard.

  Simple.

  The trick was to get Anatole into that Ring and unleash all the hatred Talyn kept locked inside himself. Yet so far, Anatole had wisely refused.

  One day, though ...

  He was going to find Anatole's weakness, and when he did, he planned to hand-deliver Anatole's soul to their gods.

  CHAPTER 3

  "Reporters aren't allowed back here. You'll have--"

  "It's okay, Erix. She's with me."

  Felicia looked past the huge, fierce bald male in front of her to see Talyn sitting on a dilapidated bench in the run-down dressing room. This was so not what she'd envisioned for a champion's prefight area.

  Her smile faded as she realized the other male with him was in the process of covering horrible bruises on Talyn's body. "Did I miss the fight? I thought it didn't start for another half hour."

  A tic started in Erix's jaw as he returned to Talyn's side to wrap his hands so that Talyn couldn't use his claws in the fight to scar his opponent. "It doesn't. This is from his CO."

  Felicia scowled. "I don't understand."

  Talyn laughed wryly. "Anatole bets against me."

  "And has his bastard goons beat the shit out of the boy whenever he has a fight coming, to handicap him."

  She felt sick over the news.

  Talyn brushed his wrapped hand lightly against her cheek and offered her a bashful smile. "It's all right. Pain's my best friend. Just makes me that much more determined to watch him cry like a bitch when he loses his pay." Dropping his hand, he sucked his breath in sharply as his manager touched a particularly nasty bruise on his back.

  "Here," she said, pushing the male aside. "Let me."

  Ferrick arched a brow.

  She met his manager's sneer without flinching. "I'm a licensed physical therapist and med student. I can help him."

  Talyn took her hand and placed it against his cheek. An Andarion gesture of extreme affection. "Ferrick and Erix, meet my Felicia."

  Ferrick moved away so that she could take over. "He has limited mobility on his right arm. If you could loosen the muscles there, we'd all be grateful."

  "Is there a table he can lie down on?"

  Erix gestured past the lockers. "In back."

  She gently tugged for Talyn to follow her to it. "Can't you delay the fight?"

  He shook his head. "Only for death or military orders. Anything else is a forfeit." He hesitated at the table. "Face down?"

  "Yes." She waited for him to lie down before she gently touched his back to evaluate what all had been done to him. It was even worse than it appeared. "Oh, Talyn." She wanted to weep at how badly he'd been beaten already. And he hadn't even stepped into the Ring yet.

  "Really, it's okay, Felicia. Believe me, this isn't the worst ass-kicking I've had. And those were just from my mom for failure
to put the toilet seat down at night."

  She rolled her eyes at his offbeat humor. Given his immense size and muscle tone, she seriously doubted his mother had ever laid a finger to him. "No one should be used to this."

  He lifted his head to look at her. "Would you think I'm a totally sick bastard if I said I'd gladly have the shit kicked out of me to feel your hands on my skin?"

  She laid her palm against his cheek as those words brought tears to her eyes. "Yes."

  He smiled at her. "Good. I don't want any pretense between us."

  She kissed his cheek before she worked on his shoulder and back, where the worst damage seemed to have been done.

  "Talyn! It's time." Ferrick joined them.

  Felicia stepped back as Talyn sat up and took the ornate leather mask from Ferrick's hand. He slid it over his head so that all that showed of his features were his white eyes that held a tiny band of red around the outer edge of the iris.

  "You look like an alien is eating your face."

  Reaching for the hand wrap covers, he laughed at her comment. "Erix has a seat in front, reserved for you."

  She screwed her face up at the thought of it. Okay, she totally understood now why his mother didn't come to these things, after all. "If you don't mind, I'd rather wait for you back here. I don't really want to watch you get beat on. But I am here for you, if you need me."

  Her declination didn't seem to faze him at all as he shadowboxed to loosen his muscles. "Okay. I'll be back in a little while."

  She walked slowly into his arms and hugged him. "Good luck."

  Talyn savored the sensation of being held. No one had embraced him like this since he'd been a boy.

  "Hammer! Let's go!"

  Reluctantly, he released her and headed for the Ring. As he reached the door, he glanced back to see her watching him. Damn, she was beautiful. Like an ethereal vision. He still couldn't believe she'd agreed to accept him, given his lack of birth standing.

  That she had yet to run screaming for the nearest door to escape his presence.

  All he had to do was not get killed tonight. That would seriously screw up his future plans where she was concerned.

  Clamping down on his fang guard, he smiled under his mask and winked at her. He hadn't been kidding. To have her with him, he'd gladly get the shit kicked out of him.

  The gods knew, he'd been beaten for a whole lot less.

  *

  Unsure and terrified for Talyn, Felicia chewed her nails as she paced the back room while she listened to the sound of the crowd. She heard hisses and boos and cheers so loud, they shook the stained walls around her. None of it told her how Talyn was doing.