A Farewell to Arms

"I don't know. I don't know I'm going to get it."

  "You're going to get it. Oh boy, the girls at the Cova will think you're fine then. They'll all think you killed two hundred Austrians or captured a whole trench by yourself. Believe me, I got to work for my decorations."

  "How many have you got, Ettore?" asked the vice-consul.

  "He's got everything," Simmons said. "He's the boy they're running the war for."

  "I've got the bronze twice and three silver medals," said Ettore. "But the papers on only one have come through."

  "What's the matter with the others?" asked Simmons.

  "The action wasn't successful," said Ettore. "When the action isn't successful they hold up all the medals."

  "How many times have you been wounded, Ettore?"

  "Three times bad. I got three wound stripes. See?" He pulled his sleeve around. The stripes were parallel silver lines on a black background sewed to the cloth of the sleeve about eight inches below the shoulder.

  "You got one too," Ettore said to me. "Believe me they're fine to have. I'd rather have them than medals. Believe me, boy, when you get three you've got something. You only get one for a wound that puts you three months in the hospital."

  "Where were you wounded, Ettore?" asked the vice-consul.

  Ettore pulled up his sleeve.

  "Here," he showed the deep smooth red scar. "Here on my leg. I can't show you that because I got puttees on; and in the foot. There's dead bone in my foot that stinks right now. Every morning I take new little pieces out and it stinks all the time."

  "What hit you?" asked Simmons.

  "A hand-grenade. One of those potato mashers. It just blew the whole side of my foot off. You know those potato mashers?" He turned to me.

  "Sure."

  "I saw the son of a bitch throw it," Ettore said. "It knocked me down and I thought I was dead all right but those damn potato mashers haven't got anything in them. I shot the son of a bitch with my rifle. I always carry a rifle so they can't tell I'm an officer."

  "How did he look?" asked Simmons.

  "That was the only one he had," Ettore said. "I don't know why he threw it. I guess he always wanted to throw one. He never saw any real fighting probably. I shot the son of a bitch all right."

  "How did he look when you shot him?" Simmons asked.

  "Hell, how should I know?" said Ettore. "I shot him in the belly. I was afraid I'd miss him if I shot him in the head."

  "How long have you been an officer, Ettore?" I asked.

  "Two years. I'm going to be a captain. How long have you been a lieutenant?"

  "Going on three years."

  "You can't be a captain because you don't know the Italian language well enough," Ettore said. "You can talk but you can't read and write well enough. You got to have an education to be a captain. Why don't you go in the American army?"

  "Maybe I will."

  "I wish to God I could. Oh, boy, how much does a captain get, Mac?"

  "I don't know exactly. Around two hundred and fifty dollars, I think."

  "Jesus Christ what I could do with two hundred and fifty dollars. You better get in the American army quick, Fred. See if you can't get me in."

  "All right."

  "I can command a company in Italian. I could learn it in English easy."

  "You'd be a general," said Simmons.

  "No, I don't know enough to be a general. A general's got to know a hell of a lot. You guys think there ain't anything to war. You ain't got brains enough to be a second-class corporal."

  "Thank God I don't have to be," Simmons said.

  "Maybe you will if they round up all you slackers. Oh, boy, I'd like to have you two in my platoon. Mac too. I'd make you my orderly, Mac."

  "You're a great boy, Ettore," Mac said. "But I'm afraid you're a militarist."

  "I'll be a colonel before the war's over," Ettore said.

  "If they don't kill you."

  "They won't kill me." He touched the stars at his collar with his thumb and forefinger. "See me do that? We always touch our stars if anybody mentions getting killed."

  "Let's go, Sim," said Saunders standing up.

  "All right."

  "So long," I said. "I have to go too." It was a quarter to six by the clock inside the bar. "Ciaou, Ettore."

  "Ciaou, Fred," said Ettore. "That's pretty fine you're going to get the silver medal."

  "I don't know I'll get it."

  "You'll get it all right, Fred. I heard you were going to get it all right."

  "Well, so long," I said. "Keep out of trouble, Ettore."

  "Don't worry about me. I don't drink and I don't run around. I'm no boozer and whorehound. I know what's good for me."

  "So long," I said. "I'm glad you're going to be promoted captain."

  "I don't have to wait to be promoted. I'm going to be a captain for merit of war. You know. Three stars with the crossed swords and crown above. That's me."

  "Good luck."

  "Good luck. When you going back to the front?"

  "Pretty soon."

  "Well, I'll see you around."

  "So long."

  "So long. Don't take any bad nickels."

  I walked on down a back Street that led to a cross-cut to the hospital. Ettore was twenty-three. He had been brought up by an uncle in San Francisco and was visiting his father and mother in Torino when war was declared. He had a sister, who had been sent to America with him at the same time to live with the uncle, who would graduate from normal school this year. He was a legitimate hero who bored every one he met. Catherine could not stand him.

  "We have heroes too," she said. "But usually, darling, they're much quieter."

  "I don't mind him."

  "I wouldn't mind him if he wasn't so conceited and didn't bore me, and bore me, and bore me."

  "He bores me."

  "You're sweet to say so, darling. But you don't need to. You can picture him at the front and you know he's useful but he's so much the type of boy I don't care for."

  "I know."

  "You're awfully sweet to know, and I try and like him but he's a dreadful, dreadful boy really."

  "He said this afternoon he was going to be a captain."

  "I'm glad," said Catherine. "That should please him."

  "Wouldn't you like me to have some more exalted rank?"

  "No, darling. I only want you to have enough rank so that we're admitted to the better restaurants."

  "That's just the rank I have."

  "You have a splendid rank. I don't want you to have any more rank. It might go to your head. Oh, darling, I'm awfully glad you're not conceited. I'd have married you even if you were conceited but it's very restful to have a husband who's not conceited."

  We were talking softly out on the balcony. The moon was supposed to rise but there was a mist over the town and it did not come up and in a little while it started to drizzle and we came in. Outside the mist turned to rain and in a little while it was raining hard and we heard it drumming on the roof. I got up and stood at the door to see if it was raining in but it wasn't, so I left the door open.

  "Who else did you see?" Catherine asked.

  "Mr. and Mrs. Meyers."

  "They're a strange lot."

  "He's supposed to have been in the penitentiary at home. They let him out to die."

  "And he lived happily in Milan forever after."

  "I don't know how happily."

  "Happily enough after jail I should think."

  "She's bringing some things here."

  "She brings splendid things. Were you her dear boy?"

  "One of them."

  "You are all her dear boys," Catherine said. "She prefers the dear boys. Listen to it rain."

  "It's raining hard."

  "And you'll always love me, won't you?"

  "Yes."

  "And the rain won't make any difference?"

  "No."

  "That'
s good. Because I'm afraid of the rain."

  "Why?" I was sleepy. Outside the rain was falling steadily.

  "I don't know, darling. I've always been afraid of the rain."

  "I like it."

  "I like to walk in it. But it's very hard on loving."

  "I'll love you always."

  "I'll love you in the rain and in the snow and in the hail and-- what else is there?"

  "I don't know. I guess I'm sleepy."

  "Go to sleep, darling, and I'll love you no matter how it is."

  "You're not really afraid of the rain are you?"

  "Not when I'm with you."

  "Why are you afraid of it?"

  "I don't know."

  "Tell me."

  "Don't make me."

  "Tell me."

  "No."

  "Tell me."

  "All right. I'm afraid of the rain because sometimes I see me dead in it."

  "No."

  "And sometimes I see you dead in it."

  "That's more likely."

  "No, it's not, darling. Because I can keep you safe. I know I can. But nobody can help themselves."

  "Please stop it. I don't want you to get Scotch and crazy tonight. We won't be together much longer."

  "No, but I am Scotch and crazy. But I'll stop it. It's all nonsense."

  "Yes it's all nonsense."

  "It's all nonsense. It's only nonsense. I'm not afraid of the rain. I'm not afraid of the rain. Oh, oh, God, I wish I wasn't." She was crying. I comforted her and she stopped crying. But outside it kept on raining.

  20

  One day in the afternoon we went to the races. Ferguson went too and Crowell Rodgers, the boy who had been wounded in the eyes by the explosion of the shell nose-cap. The girls dressed to go after lunch while Crowell and I sat on the bed in his room and read the past performances of the horses and the predictions in the racing paper. Crowell's head was bandaged and he did not care much about these races but read the racing paper constantly and kept track of all the horses for something to do. He said the horses were a terrible lot but they were all the horses we had. Old Meyers liked him and gave him tips. Meyers won on nearly every race but disliked to give tips because it brought down the prices. The racing was very crooked. Men who had been ruled off the turf everywhere else were racing in Italy. Meyers' information was good but I hated to ask him because sometimes he did not answer, and always you could see it hurt him to tell you, but he felt obligated to tell us for some reason and he hated less to tell Crowell. Crowell's eyes had been hurt, one was hurt badly, and Meyers had trouble with his eyes and so he liked Crowell. Meyers never told his wife what horses he was playing and she won or lost, mostly lost, and talked all the time.

  We four drove out to San Siro in an open carriage. It was a lovely day and we drove out through the park and out along the tramway and out of town where the road was dusty. There were villas with iron fences and big overgrown gardens and ditches with water flowing and green vegetable gardens with dust on the leaves. We could look across the plain and see farmhouses and the rich green farms with their irrigation ditches and the mountains to the north. There were many carriages going into the race track and the men at the gate let us in without cards because we were in uniform. We left the carriage, bought programmes, and walked across the infield and then across the smooth thick turf of the course to the paddock. The grand-stands were old and made of wood and the betting booths were under the stands and in a row out near the stables. There was a crowd of soldiers along the fence in the infield. The paddock was fairly well filled with people and they were walking the horses around in a ring under the trees behind the grandstand. We saw people we knew and got chairs for Ferguson and Catherine and watched the horses.

  They went around, one after the other, their heads down, the grooms leading them. One horse, a purplish black, Crowell swore was dyed that color. We watched him and it seemed possible. He had only come out just before the bell rang to saddle. We looked him up in the programme from the number on the groom's arm and it was listed a black gelding named Japalac. The race was for horses that had never won a race worth one thousand lire or more. Catherine was sure his color had been changed. Ferguson said she could not tell. I thought he looked suspicious. We all agreed we ought to back him and pooled one hundred lire. The odds sheets showed he would pay thirty-five to one. Crowell went over and bought the tickets while we watched the jockeys ride around once more and then go out under the trees to the track and gallop slowly up to the turn where the start was to be.

  We went up in the grand-stand to watch the race. They had no elastic barrier at San Siro then and the starter lined up all the horses, they looked very small way up the track, and then sent them off with a crack of his long whip. They came past us with the black horse well in front and on the turn he was running away from the others. I watched them on the far side with the glasses and saw the jockey fighting to hold him in but he could not hold him and when they came around the turn and into the stretch the black horse was fifteen lengths ahead of the others. He went way on up and around the turn after the finish.

  "Isn't it wonderful," Catherine said. "We'll have over three thousand lire. He must be a splendid horse."

  "I hope his color doesn't run," Crowell said, "before they pay off."

  "He was really a lovely horse," Catherine said. "I wonder if Mr. Meyers backed him."

  "Did you have the winner?" I called to Meyers. He nodded.

  "I didn't," Mrs. Meyers said. "Who did you children bet on?"

  "Japalac."

  "Really? He's thirty-five to one!"

  "We liked his color."

  "I didn't. I thought he looked seedy. They told me not to back him."

  "He won't pay much," Meyers said.

  "He's marked thirty-five to one in the quotes," I said.

  "He won't pay much. At the last minute," Meyers said, "they put a lot of money on him."

  "No."

  "Kempton and the boys. You'll see. He won't pay two to one."

  "Then we won't get three thousand lire," Catherine said. "I don't like this crooked racing!"

  "We'll get two hundred lire."

  "That's nothing. That doesn't do us any good. I thought we were going to get three thousand."

  "It's crooked and disgusting," Ferguson said.

  "Of course," said Catherine, "if it hadn't been crooked we'd never have backed him at all. But I would have liked the three thousand lire."

  "Let's go down and get a drink and see what they pay," Crowell said. We went out to where they posted the numbers and the bell rang to pay off and they put up 18.50 after Japalac to win. That meant he paid less than even money on a ten-lira bet.

  We went to the bar under the grand-stand and had a whiskey and soda apiece. We ran into a couple of Italians we knew and McAdams, the vice-consul, and they came up with us when we joined the girls. The Italians were full of manners and McAdams talked to Catherine while we went down to bet again. Mr. Meyers was standing near the pari-mutuel.

  "Ask him what he played," I said to Crowell.

  "What are you on, Mr. Meyers?" Crowell asked. Meyers took out his programme and pointed to the number five with his pencil.

  "Do you mind if we play him too?" Crowell asked.

  "Go ahead. Go ahead. But don't tell my wife I gave it to you."

  "Will you have a drink?" I asked.

  "No thanks. I never drink."

  We put a hundred lire on number five to win and a hundred to place and then had another whiskey and soda apiece. I was feeling very good and we picked up a couple more Italians, who each had a drink with us, and went back to the girls. These Italians were also very mannered and matched manners with the two we had collected before. In a little while no one could sit down. I gave the tickets to Catherine.

  "What horse is it?"

  "I don't know. Mr. Meyers' choice."

  "Don't you even know the name?"

&nbs
p; "No. You can find it on the programme. Number five I think."

  "You have touching faith," she said. The number five won but did not pay anything. Mr. Meyers was angry.

  "You have to put up two hundred lire to make twenty," he said. "Twelve lire for ten. It's not worth it. My wife lost twenty lire."

  "I'll go down with you," Catherine said to me. The Italians all stood up. We went downstairs and out to the paddock.

  "Do you like this?" Catherine asked.

  "Yes. I guess I do."

  "It's all right, I suppose," she said. "But, darling, I can't stand to see so many people."

  "We don't see many."

  "No. But those Meyers and the man from the bank with his wife and daughters--"

  "He cashes my sight drafts," I said.

  "Yes but some one else would if he didn't. Those last four boys were awful."

  "We can stay out here and watch the race from the fence."

  "That will be lovely. And, darling, let's back a horse we've never heard of and that Mr. Meyers won't be backing."

  "All right."

  We backed a horse named Light For Me that finished fourth in a field of five. We leaned on the fence and watched the horses go by, their hoofs thudding as they went past, and saw the mountains off in the distance and Milan beyond the trees and the fields.

  "I feel so much cleaner," Catherine said. The horses were coming back, through the gate, wet and sweating, the jockeys quieting them and riding up to dismount under the trees.

  "Wouldn't you like a drink? We could have one out here and see the horses."

  "I'll get them," I said.

  "The boy will bring them," Catherine said. She put her hand up and the boy came out from the Pagoda bar beside the stables. We sat down at a round iron table.

  "Don't you like it better when we're alone?"

  "Yes," I said.

  "I felt very lonely when they were all there."

  "It's grand here," I said.

  "Yes. It's really a pretty course."

  "It's nice."

  "Don't let me spoil your fun, darling. I'll go back whenever you want."

  "No," I said. "We'll stay here and have our drink. Then we'll go down and stand at the water jump for the steeplechase."

  "You're awfully good to me," she said.

  After we had been alone awhile we were glad to see the others again. We had a good time.

  21

  In September the first cool nights came, then the days were cool and the leaves on the trees in the park began to turn color and we knew the summer was gone. The fighting at the front went very badly and they could not take San Gabriele. The fighting on the Bainsizza plateau was over and by the middle of the month the fighting for San Gabriele was about over too. They could not take it. Ettore was gone back to the front. The horses were gone to Rome and there was no more racing. Crowell had gone to Rome too, to be sent back to America. There were riots twice in the town against the war and bad rioting in Turin. A British major at the club told me the Italians had lost one hundred and fifty thousand men on the Bainsizza plateau and on San Gabriele. He said they had lost forty thousand on the Carso besides. We had a drink and he talked. He said the fighting was over for the year down here and that the Italians had bitten off more than they could chew. He said the offensive in Flanders was going to the bad. If they killed men as they did this fall the Allies would be cooked in another year. He said we were all cooked but we were all right as long as we did not know it. We were all cooked. The thing was not to recognize it. The last country to realize they were cooked would win the war. We had another drink. Was I on somebody's staff? No. He was. It was all balls. We were alone in the club sitting back in one of the big leather sofas. His boots were smoothly polished dull leather. They were beautiful boots. He said it was all balls. They thought only in divisions and man-power. They all squabbled about divisions and only killed them when they got them. They were all cooked. The Germans won the victories. By God they were soldiers. The old Hun was a soldier. But they were cooked too. We were all cooked. I asked about Russia. He said they were cooked already. I'd soon see they were cooked. Then the Austrians were cooked too. If they got some Hun divisions they could do it. Did he think they would attack this fall? Of course they would. The Italians were cooked. Everybody knew they were cooked. The old Hun would come down through the Trentino and cut the railway at Vicenza and then where would the Italians be? They tried that in 'sixteen, I said. Not with Germans. Yes, I said. But they probably wouldn't do that, he said. It was too simple. They'd try something complicated and get royally cooked. I had to go, I said. I had to get back to the hospital. "Good-by," he said. Then cheerily, "Every sort of luck!" There was a great contrast between his world pessimism and personal cheeriness.