Home Tears

  “Because I don’t have any.”

  Because she’d been stranded in a place for so long and she didn’t know if she was going to live or die. Because she kept thinking about her mom, kept feeling her presence, and she just wanted to see her face one more time. Dani felt her throat closing up, and some tears threatening to spill. She didn’t want to cry. She couldn’t remember the last time she did that either.

  “I get that.” Jonah nodded. “There were a few things I wanted of my mom’s when she died. They were small things, but they were damned important to me. One was a picture of her and me, the other was a picture of her and Aiden. It was nice to have a picture of my mom in my wallet. Comforting. It helped, especially when I was around my dad’s family. They’re like sharks. Always circling for blood in the water.”

  Water…

  She spoke without thinking. “I was in a storm. I took a job as a teacher at this orphanage, and we got stranded in this building. The storm wasn’t too long, but when it was over—”

  It was all happening again. She was back there, and she heard that eerie silence.

  “Some of the kids were outside playing.”

  She ran out and grabbed whom she could. The first wave was coming down—she couldn’t grab them all. A lump was sitting in the back of her throat. It was blocking her air, and she could barely grasp for oxygen again.

  “The water slammed against our building, and the bottom floor was swept away. It was there and then it wasn’t. Part of the wall maintained, and we climbed over to the next building. Then the wall collapsed. We were stuck in that second building.”

  They couldn’t get out.

  No one knew they were there.

  “Once it was over, it was a while until we heard the search parties. We could hear them, and we’d call out.”

  She blinked a few times, feeling the tears falling free. “They didn’t hear us for the longest time. We were so weak, and a lot of the kids couldn’t move. Some were injured from running into the building. Some got hurt trying to get into the second building. Some were hit when the wall collapsed against where we were.”

  She was in that room again. Her throat was burning. Her stomach was hurting. The smell of urine was so thick in the room. They were throwing up. And then nothing… “They all just fell silent.”

  “You were in a tsunami?”

  “It hit a small island where we were.”

  “A tsunami’s not a storm. It’s a natural disaster.”

  “No one knows about where I was.” Now the shock started in. She hadn’t talked about it with anyone, even Boone. Mae. No one. Panicked, she turned to him. “Don’t tell anyone.”

  “I won’t. I promise.”

  He patted her hand, or it might’ve meant to be a pat. His hand touched hers and began to leave, but she turned hers over quickly. She grasped onto his hand, and held it. “Thank you.” Dani was staring right into his eyes. Only a few inches separated them, and she felt her lips lifting in a half-grin. “Erica was right. She once said your eyes could spin a rock into a frenzy. I see what she meant.”

  His eyes darkened. “That was a long time ago.”

  “I still remember.” Dani saw the dreaminess of his eyes. They were a dark brown, and they were almost black when he felt strong emotions, like he was feeling now. They could smolder, burn, get heated, but she saw something Erica hadn’t. There was a calming effect to them, too. Peace. She saw a refuge in them. “You’re not the guy everyone thinks you are, are you?”

  “No.” He regarded her with a faint grin. “I know one of your secrets. Now you know one of mine.”

  She sat on the bench for another ten minutes after Jonah left. He asked if she wanted to go back to the beer gardens with him, but she didn’t have it in her. When he left, it was an odd feeling that settled over her. She felt comforted, but also exposed. One of her secrets wasn’t a secret anymore. She hadn’t gone into detail, but he knew about the storm. Her head was down as she walked the rest of the path around the pond, circling it toward where her car was parked.

  “Dani.”

  She looked up now and saw Aiden waving to her. The group had moved to one of the farthest tables outside the beer gardens. It was the closest to the where the cars were lined up.

  Jonah sat at the end of their table, with a redhead trying to hang on him. His arm wasn’t around her. He wasn’t even paying her attention, instead listening to Hawk across the table, but Dani could tell the redhead wasn’t giving up. Hawk had his own woman, clad in black leather, and they seemed perfect.

  Aiden separated from the group, crossing to her. “Hey, are you leaving?”

  “I think that’s for the best. I don’t want to air any more dirty laundry, and I will if I see Julia again. Apparently, I’m in the confessing mood tonight. I think it’s time to turn in.”

  “Look.” Aiden’s tone turned serious. “I wasn’t outside when you talked to your sister, but in case you’re leaving because of Kate, I want you to know she’s not always this power hungry. She told me about your conversation earlier today and how she wants you to break up Julia and Jake. She’s not using you or anything, if that’s what you were concerned about. It’s just she’s affected more than the rest of us. I have Jonah and everyone loves Bubba. Robbie’s accepted no matter what, you know? Everyone thinks Stilts is the most hilarious thing that’s come to town in a long time. So for most of us, yeah, we’re affected by the small-town politics, but it’s more for Kate. She’s—”

  “Not accepted.” Dani could relate.

  “Yeah.” Aiden looked guilty. “Kate was so excited when she heard you were back in town. Julia has made her life hell. She’s gone out of her way to be cruel to Kate and everyone knows it’s just because Kate is Jake’s partner. She thinks he’s going to leave her for Kate or something.”

  “Kate’s not an O’Hara.” Dani rolled her eyes. “Doesn’t Julia know? That’s a dating requirement for Jake.”

  “Try telling that to your sister’s jealousy. It rears an ugly head sometimes.”

  “I have in the past. Never works.”

  Aiden laughed and then gestured toward the parking lot. “We’re all going to go to Mae’s Grill. Would you come with us? I know it’s going to be crazy busy there, but the whole group would like to get to know you better.”

  She remembered Jonah’s warning. It didn’t hurt to have friends in a small town, so Dani found herself agreeing to meet them there. Once inside the Mustang, she didn’t start it right away. She rested her head against her seat and let out a deep breath.

  What the hell am I doing?

  Friends? That’s what she was doing now? Trying to be included by a group? Dani never belonged in crowds like those. She didn’t have friends. She wasn’t even sure if she knew how to be a friend now.

  Thump! Thump!

  Jumping, Dani gasped and saw Jonah grinning at her through her window.

  He motioned for her to unlock the passenger door, and he climbed in once she did. “You looked like you were sleeping? Did our talk wear you out?” He winked. “Or maybe it was holding my hand. I know it must’ve been overwhelming to touch these glorious things.” He held his hands in the air, turning them around like he was modeling.

  She groaned. “There’s the old cocky Jonah from high school. I was almost convinced you were a nice guy.”

  “Hush now. No spreading that secret around. You were supposed to have forgotten all about it?” His laugh grew more serious. “Jokes aside, what are you doing?”

  “I’m waiting for the parking lot to clear out. What are you doing?”

  “I need a ride to Mae’s.”

  Dani shook her head even as she started the car. “What is it about you that everyone loves? It’s like you have some billboard on you that says ‘Like me, I’m adorable.’ Does everyone do what you ask of them? ‘I need a ride,’ so therefore, I must give you a ride? Is that how it works?”

  But even as she was grumbling, she knew how it worked. He was a good guy, but
he was also charming, charismatic, and he had a hell of a body. She knew not many could resist when he asked for something.

  Oh good God. I’m becoming one of them.

  “What?” He seemed genuinely puzzled.

  “Nothing.”

  “You know.” He narrowed his eyes, studying her. “You’re not like everyone else. Some girls act all tough and are mean right off the bat because they’re protecting themselves. I get that. I do, and I know that women like me. And then there are the other girls who—”

  “Throw themselves at you.”

  “Don’t get me wrong. Sometimes it’s nice and it’s what I need after a hard day at work, but to be honest, I think you have so much crap to deal with, you couldn’t ever see me in that light.” He lowered his voice. “That’s why I like hanging out with you. That’s part of the reason I showed up yesterday for dinner and sat on the bench with you tonight.”

  It made sense, but she wanted to make sure he understood. “You’re not responsible for me.”

  “Yes. I am.”

  “No—”

  He softened his tone. “Let me be responsible. Let one person care for you.”

  “I didn’t tell you that stuff to make you feel like this.”

  He shrugged. “You tell that person something, trust them, and they have your back. You do it back. Friendship. It’s part of the package.”

  She held in her breath, a knot forming in her gut. She didn’t know what to say to that. “Friends?”

  He grinned. “Looks like you’re stuck with me.”

  And as she headed out of the parking lot and followed behind the rest to Mae’s Grill, she realized she didn’t even want to argue against it. That horrified her the most. Or it should’ve.

  Aiden called it.

  Mae’s Grill was filled to the max. And it was a mix between the fair’s beer garden inhabitants, the regulars, and tourists who traveled up during the summer for Tenderfoot Rush. All three groups came together at Mae’s Grill, and Jonah was right.

  Jonah tapped her hand and asked, leaning close to her ear, “What do you drink?”

  “Just a water. Thanks.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Okay.” He nodded toward the corner. “Gang’s over there.”

  When Dani arrived, Aiden and Kate moved to her side. “Where were you?”

  “I was about to send Bubba out to your home.”

  “I held back and waited for the parking lot to clear.”

  Shifting on her feet, Kate glanced over her shoulder. “Did I see you come in with Jonah?”

  “Yeah. He wanted a ride.” Dani shrugged. Seeing Robbie on the dance floor with someone, she asked Kate, “Is that one of the girls he’s interested in?”

  Kate nodded, making a face. “That’s Lori. She was here, just waiting for him once we arrived.”

  “Then, in that case,” Dani nodded toward the pool table. “Want to play a game of pool?”

  “Love to!” Kate looked so relieved. “Thank you, and maybe we can flirt it up with a couple guys over there.”

  Dani added, “Robbie won’t know what hit him.”

  “Damn straight!” Kate laughed, ducking around Jonah as he returned from the bar. “Hey, Jonah. I’m stealing your ride. She’s going to be my sidekick the rest of the night.” She tapped on his shoulder and pointed to a table of women, all eyeing him up and down. “Just a word of advice, avoid that table. They look a little crazed tonight.”

  Dani grabbed the water from Jonah’s offered hand, but Mae showed up at that time. “We’re swamped. Can you help behind the counter?”

  “Yeah?” Dani glanced to the rest of the group. “You guys wouldn’t mind?”

  Kate waved her ahead. “And have our own personal bartender? Go. Now! We won’t have to wait in line anymore.”

  Dani just laughed, then waved to everyone. She moved through the crowd, bypassing Robbie who was heading back to the table with Lori in tow.

  Dani used to help bartend when she was younger, before her mom died, and Aunt Kathryn took over. Mae seemed to vanish from their lives then, but Dani worked behind the bar in her travels. It was a job where she could pick up some extra cash whenever she needed it. The crowd was insane, but she didn’t think it’d be too hard before she picked it back up, just like old times.

  Aunt Mae yelled in her ear, patting her on the shoulder, “Hope you didn’t go rusty with your time away.”

  Dani merely shook her head. “Never!” Then she began filling an order, and the first hour went fast. The rest of the night passed just as quickly, but the last thirty minutes were always the worst. The drunk got drunker and the one-nighters became more brazen with sharing their numbers.

  Jonah had taken residence at the end of her counter space. Every time a girl approached and her hand lingered down his arm, he’d shoot Dani a look and she’d move in. The first few were deterred when Dani announced that he’d come with her. And then one took it as a challenge to throwdown, and Dani changed tactics. Now she merely slid them a watered-down Coke and pointed across the bar. She told ‘em it came from the gentleman in the blue.

  There were too many gentlemen in blue to count.

  The girls loved it, didn’t notice it was watered-down soda only, and went off in search for their mysterious gentleman. After the fifth girl, Dani slapped a towel in front of Jonah and suggested, “Must be hard. Having to literally fend them off, huh? Or having another chick to do it for you?” His rich laugh was her reward, and she rolled her eyes. She gestured to the towel. “If you really want to get rid of them, just get busy. I’m sure Mae will need all the help she can get to clean up.”

  Robbie heard the last words as he approached the counter. He noted Jonah, who was leaving to start clearing tables. “You and Jonah seem to get along.”

  “For now.” She winked at him. “What’ll you have?”

  “Water and a Diet Coke.”

  “Lori’s had enough, huh?” Dani murmured as she filled the glasses. Robbie lingered afterwards, gazing back to that table where the group was still hanging out. “Something wrong, Robbie?”

  “Yeah.” He hunched over the bar, folding his arms on the counter. “Can I ask you a question?”

  “Sure. Although we really only met tonight.”

  “That’s why I want to ask you. You’re objective. You might have a different set of eyes.” He leaned closer. “Do you think…coming from your first impression, do you think Lori would make a good mother?”

  “Whoa. What?” Dani slid a drink to another customer. “I barely remember Lori, and I haven’t talked to her at all since getting back here. It’s only been a few days.”

  “Yeah, but look at her. Does she look like good mother material?”

  “Uh.” Lori was pretty. That’s all Dani thought. “Look, I can only tell you what I do think, and if you’re asking the bartender about the girl you’re dating, you’re probably dating the wrong girl.” Kate was watching them talk, but trying not to make it obvious. She ducked behind Bubba. Dani let out a breath. “Go for the ones who scare you. Maybe there’s a reason they scare you.”

  “You think?”

  Dani lifted a shoulder up, picking up a washcloth to dry out a glass. “I don’t think I’m one to give advice. Trust me.” Two men. One who left her, and one she left. And speaking of, karma wasn’t on her side.

  Jake walked into the bar.

  He and Robbie crossed paths, and did the whole guy head-nod thing, and kept on walking. Spotting her, he slowed, an unreadable mask falling over his face. “Mae likes an extra hand at closing time.” He nodded to Mae as she came down the counter. “Heya, Mae.”

  “Jake.” Her eyes skimmed over him and Dani, then slapped the counter. “You know, thanks for coming tonight, but I think we’ll be alright. Jonah’s here, and Katie’s over there, too.”

  Kate laughed at something Bubba said, slapping him on the shoulder. She looked at Robbie, who was standing by Lori, and missed the first half
of Bubba’s huge shoulder. Her hand slipped off, and she fell off her bar stool.

  “Yeah, Kate’s drunk. I think I’ll stick around for a bit.” He