The Doomed Planet
At his signal, a group of Domestic Police took charge of Crobe. The man stood. He shouted, “You are all suffering from penis envy!” He was still shouting it as he was led away.
Another group of “bluebottles” approached the balcony.
Lombar Hisst was on his knees there. He was vomiting. The bluebottles gave the Marine major a receipt. They slid Hisst into a black sack, put him on a stretcher and bore him away.
The proclamation, this time, since who should sign had been sorted out, made the round of the table quite quickly.
Heller got it back. He looked at it.
Two down, four to go.
PART EIGHTY-EIGHT
Chapter 5
Heller said, “The conference has already passed a measure to abolish the Apparatus and the intelligence practices of Earth. However, the matter was not placed in proclamation form and finalized.
“His Majesty has stated that he does not wish to hear of the planet Earth again, ever. Therefore I propose, in concurrence with his wishes and requirements, that we word the proclamation as follows: ‘The Coordinated Information Apparatus is abolished. Never in the future may there be a state organization, independent, devoted to the subject of intelligence.’ But at this point, gentlemen, we could very easily get involved in the endless details of what Earth intelligence organizations are comprised of so that we could forbid them. And we would find ourselves mentioning the planet Earth in connection with them.
“As you know, the Army and the Fleet both have intelligence services, vital to the prosecution of a war. We do not know and have no time to untangle the various technologies of intelligence. I, for one, want to get these proclamations completed.”
He got nods from the table.
“The abuses of the Apparatus were twofold. The first was recruiting criminals from the prisons to act as their personnel, and the second was to turn those vicious people loose on the population.”
The instant he got it out, he knew he had made a mistake. He had been trying to smooth out the wrath of the conference and the crowds. This analysis, while quite correct and succinct, pleasing enough to an engineer, was like throwing burning brands. It brought to vivid view all the horrors the population had been made to suffer.
Snarls in the hall and screams of rage in the streets seemed to indicate that the favored course of action right this minute would be to go find and kill any remaining Apparatus personnel. It looked like the riots were going to surge up all over again!
Vantagio, he mourned, I wish you were here instead of a target. He felt he was too green to cope with this sort of thing.
In mathematics, if you got an unexpected result, you sometimes had to use it. Maybe math would work. He would use the wrath.
He pulled out his gun and pantomimed shooting. He shouted, “WE WANT THE APPARATUS DEAD AND THIS IS HOW WE ARE GOING TO DO IT!”
It got attention.
They were listening eagerly.
“We word the proclamation that it is forbidden to use FOREIGN intelligence techniques upon the citizens of the Voltar Confederacy! And that the penalty for doing so shall be DEATH!”
It caught their fancy.
“And so that there won’t be any question as to what is meant, I propose that in the proclamation we form a committee with a member from Army Intelligence, a member from Fleet Intelligence and a member from the Domestic Police, that we call it the Anti-Foreign Intelligence Committee with the duty of preventing such techniques from being used against the citizens of Voltar, that the committee have the duty of defining these, that it be placed at Grand Council level and that it be chaired by one who knows this scene and investigated it, namely Royal Officer Bis, suitably promoted. He HATES the Apparatus!”
There was a storm of applause in the hall and on the streets.
Heller bowed and sat down. He got his assent and he got the proclamation written and sent on its rounds.
He mopped at his forehead with his redstar engineer’s rag.
There was a lot to this statecraft stuff. Intelligence services, no matter where, had a lot of things in common. If he had let the original proposal stand, forbidding anything known on Earth to be used by Voltar, it could have crippled Army and Fleet intelligence services, for they did many things similar to those of Earth. An intelligence service was an intelligence service. The thing wrong with the Apparatus—and the way they used the subject on Earth—was that it employed intelligence to repress their own domestic scene instead of enemies in war. And the result was that the government began to wage war on the citizens!
Three down and three to go. The next one would be tougher and the last one the worst of all!
PART EIGHTY-EIGHT
Chapter 6
Heller called for a cymbal clash for silence.
“I know,” he said, “that His Majesty wishes to begin his reign in an atmosphere of peace. It is his dearest wish that his subjects be happy and content and no longer disrupted by oppression and turmoil.
“Therefore, I propose, for this fourth proclamation, an amnesty. First, I think we should include all the peoples of Calabar and anyone connected with the recent revolt. This rescinds all rebel proclamations en masse and also amnesties all persons on Calabar or connected to the revolt for any crime of whatever kind as of Universal Star Time, two hours ago.”
This seemed agreeable. Nobody was mad at Calabar now. It also got General Whip off the hook without mentioning it.
Heller thought for a bit. This was going to get tricky now. He was going to have to try to amnesty the Apparatus troops: otherwise, in bands here and there and, within the population, incidents would continue to take toll. He knew even proposing it could start another wave of ferocity, maybe even killing.
He looked at a Domestic Police general at the conference table. “How long do you think it would take to round up and try any and all persons who might have damaged property or persons in these recent riots? I am speaking now of the rioting citizens.”
He could see the instant reaction on the monitors of the crowds. It had not occurred to anyone that their actions might be charged as crimes.
The Domestic Police general scrubbed at his face with a beefy hand. “Well, Crown, Your Lordship, sir, I am ashamed to say that it will take years. You see, we have to reorganize the Domestic Police. Many units joined the rioters. That will require a vast number of arrests and trials in itself. We were hoping to discuss getting some help from the Army.”
“But at the same time,” said Heller with a frown, “didn’t you plan on a general roundup, using what units you had intact? You know, herding citizens into stockades and holding them for weeks, maybe trying them en masse? But I was worried about how you were going to manage a house-to-house search through all the cities to round up everyone who had been actively rioting.”
The crowds on the monitors were ominously silent.
“Well,” said the Domestic Police general, scrubbing his face some more, “if we had help from the Army we could begin that right away.”
The crowds were starting to growl. This conference was talking about THEM!
“General,” said Heller, “I am assured by His Majesty that his love for his subjects is boundless. I think, to celebrate his ascension, a Confederacy-wide amnesty should be extended to all persons, regardless of crime, as of two hours ago, Universal Star Time.”
The yell began very slowly and then in the streets it swelled, “Long Live Mortiiy!”
Heller felt he had it made. He was just turning to dictate the fourth proclamation when this (bleeped) bluebottle general spoiled it. He said, aghast, “You mean all the persons in jails and prisons, too?”
“Except persons already handled, such as Gris, Madison and his crew, Crobe and Hisst. It must also include a clause so that His Majesty is not constricted in removing any Lords, officials or officers he might have to, to form a new government. We should also forbid further punishment of these people, as the last thing we want is a civil war on our hands.”
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nbsp; The bluebottle was stuck with his prisons. “But good heavens, that would empty everything we’ve got!”
“They’re too full anyway,” said Heller.
“But some of those people committed terrible crimes!”
“I’ll tell you what,” said Heller. “For any already condemned criminal, we could make the condition that he must accept the amnesty with a promise to commit no more crimes, and he must be told and it must be part of the amnesty that if he or she does commit one more felony, the immediate sentence is death. I assure you that many will reform. The amnesty does not include insane asylums, as they wouldn’t even understand.”
The bluebottle was still goggle-eyed about it and Heller would have pushed on further except that another police general at the table spoke up.
“That amnesties all the Apparatus personnel!”
That did it. The table began to snarl. The crowds, all pleased a moment ago, starting shrieking “Death to the Apparatus.”
Heller felt like telling him, you fool, there are still two or three million Apparatus people on the loose: you’re going to tie up your whole police force running them down for years! We’re going to have more riots, more burning buildings. . . .
He gave a signal and the trumpets and cymbals went. It took a while before he could speak again.
“Then I propose,” he said, “that any ex-Apparatus personnel found engaged in any criminal act after the amnesty may be shot down in situ.”
“I never heard of that. It sounds bad!”
“Oh, it is bad!” said Heller. “It’s an ancient custom of Flisten. We’ll put it right in the proclamation. Worse, we’ll also add in flagrante delicto! That’s terrible.”
“But I don’t know what those words mean!” cried the general.
“You can look it up later,” said Heller. “There are ladies in the crowds to which Homeview is bringing this conference. Take my word for it, it’s terrible. I know this is very harsh, gentlemen.”
The Domestic Police people were frowning. One of them said, “But—”
“And I was going to add, ‘And to protect people’s homes, the Army is to assist the police until they are reorganized and public calm prevails,’” Heller said quickly.
The Army looked surprised, then purposeful. The Domestic Police, all too aware of their shattered condition, looked suddenly pleased.
Heller knew he had the table now: that left the people in the streets and homes that were watching.
He lifted his head. The cameras were upon him. “His Majesty was very unwilling to begin his reign with any of his subjects in trouble. There will be plenty of work for everyone rebuilding buildings and parks that have been damaged. Why, I should think Calabar alone could absorb any person unemployed or newly released into the world: every city there needs to be rebuilt, quite in addition to all the construction that will be needed on every other planet in the Confederacy. His Majesty, I know, wishes to lift his whole domain of one hundred and ten planets to a grandeur never before known.
“Every person who accepts this amnesty must be told that he owes this chance to Mortiiy and that all he requires from them in return is their loyalty and their help to make this a better nation.”
The crowds in the streets began to cheer.
The cameras were not now on him. He wiped his face with his redstar engineer’s rag.
It had been close. He’d tell the police and Army later that in situ simply meant “on the spot” and in flagrante delicto only meant “caught in the act,” if he remembered rightly.
At least he had now prevented further riots. Beneficial in its own right and necessary, it happened to be vital, if his luck held, that the name of Earth did not crop up again because of continued battling with the Apparatus: they would be utterly desperate if they thought they would be going back to prison.
Four down. Two to go. The next one would have to be quite clever. The last one, if things went wrong, would be awful.
PART EIGHTY-EIGHT
Chapter 7
Heller heard someone back of his chair. It was the Countess Krak. She whispered, “Hightee says to tell you to stall all you can. They are in short time.”
He nodded. The fourth proclamation wasn’t back to him yet. He wondered how he could stall further.
Krak said, “I heard that measure. Why did you let all the criminals loose?”
“Gris wasn’t the only person with a blackmail hoard. It prevents Apparatus officers from starting up in the crime business.”
She didn’t make too much sense out of his reply; she also detected an evasion. “You must have had another reason than that.”
“Be quiet.”
“But you released several million criminals on the society. Why?”
“The state has been corrupt and justice slipshod.” He turned and looked at her steadily. “All right. Remember, you asked for it. You might not be the only Lissus Moam.”
She caught her breath. He was alluding to herself having been a falsely condemned nonperson until just today. Tears started into her eyes. “You did it for me. To celebrate my regaining citizenship.”
“Go away. You don’t like softhearted people.”
“I am ashamed. I love you, Jettero!”
“Well, don’t hang around here being mushy. Go help Hightee and maybe we can save our friends. A forlorn hope, but maybe.”
She suddenly kissed him. “May the Gods bless you, Jettero.”
The crowds cheered. The kiss had been camera’d on Homeview. The Countess Krak was gone.
Heller muttered, to the monitors across the room, “You wouldn’t be cheering if you knew I was trying to save your favorite enemy, Earth. Well, it’s all up to mathematics now.”
The fourth proclamation had been handed to the clerk for recording. He had stalled all he could. He stood up and signaled for a cymbal clash.
“Gentlemen, we earlier passed an informal resolution to outlaw psychology and psychiatry. I wish to incorporate that in the fifth formal proclamation which we are now about to take up. His Majesty has stated that he does not wish to hear of Earth again. If we put these subjects in a public proclamation, we will have to mention Earth and it could come to his attention. Furthermore, the names have already appeared in newssheets.
“It would seem to me that this is best covered by acceding to a demand made by the publishers who wish to be protected against things such as lying stories and that other Earth development, PR.”
There was a snarl from the conference table. They were avid to suppress anything connected with that planet.
“I therefore propose,” said Heller, “that we create the post of Censor. Such a post, appended to the staff here at Palace City, could prevent psychiatry and psychology texts from being published. It could also prevent abuses under the heading of PR.
“Actually, I should think that the post really combines with that of Royal Historian.” He got table nods in assent. “Could someone please advise me, since the Palace City staff has been so displaced, who occupies that post now?”
He already knew the answer. He was laying a trap. The clique of publishers over there was nodding, all agreeable.
A clerk stood. “Crown, Your Lordship, sir. The post of Royal Historian was held by one who, unfortunately, resisted the demands of Lombar Hisst. He is dead. The post is vacant.”
“Oh, woe!” said Heller. “A martyr! Well, that leaves us with no other choice!”
They stared at him.
“One man is a public-spirited citizen. He knows all the angles of this. He has already proven his zeal by bringing the matter to our attention. For the post of Royal Historian and Censor and Chairman of any Board of Censors, I propose Noble Arthrite Stuffy!”
Noble Stuffy, far across the room in the group of publishers, recoiled. “But . . . but . . . my publishing empire!”
“Oh, well,” said Heller, “we all have to make our little sacrifices for the good of the people. I am sure you can find somebody to run your paper for you.” He
drew himself up. “The state needs your services, Noble Arthrite Stuffy! And think how you can set an example with your paper! Think how you can uplift and uphold the purity of ethics in journalism!” He lowered his voice, “And think how thoroughly you can suppress all efforts to corrupt the population with psychiatry and psychology.”
Several other publishers grinned. The Daily Speaker had run the most columns lauding those subjects. They were pushing Stuffy toward the table.
Noble Stuffy finally stood in a vacant place. “Crown, Your Lordship, sir, even at great financial sacrifice, I cannot let the people down. I accept the appointment.”