Before Now

  Park presses me against the cold wall. One of his talented hands grips my breast while the other rubs me before he slips a finger inside. His hot mouth works at my neck and I almost moan my reply.

  “Yep,” I squeak. “I’m good.”

  Releasing me just long enough to pull my leg up, Park rests my foot on the side of the bathtub. He moves to my lips, sealing his mouth over mine, allowing his tongue to explore.

  “Okay,” Bree chuckles. “Just come on down when you’re done in there.”

  “Mm-hm,” I mumble into Park’s mouth.

  “By the way,” Bree continues, “you left your dress in the living room—along with Park’s shirt.”

  Park freezes and I turn my head, my lips skimming his cheek. “Bree,” I begin, but then I stop, not knowing what to say.

  She laughs softly. “Don’t worry. My lips are sealed.” The door opens, but before she leaves, she clears her throat. “Treat her right,” she says firmly and we all know she’s talking to Park.

  He looks me in the eyes as he answers her. “I’m going to do my best.”

  Bree laughs again as her suspicions are confirmed and the door clicks shut. I still don’t move as Park’s words sink in.

  20

  Park

  The expression on Lucy’s face does me in. It’s the combination of her gray eyes, bright with excitement, her delicate brows pulled together in confusion, and her perfect lips parted in appreciation of my vow.

  I can see she wants to believe what I say—part of her does—but there’s another piece of her that’s reluctant to trust me.

  “I wouldn’t be here right now if I had no intention of trying,” I murmur. “I will strive to do right by you. Don’t doubt me.”

  I mean it. Right now, at this moment, I mean every single word.

  Her eyes flick over my face before she smiles. My heart kicks up, beating quickly in my chest. She doesn’t say a word. Instead, she pushes her mouth against mine and kisses me hungrily.

  I growl, my hands grasping her thighs, and spreading her legs wide. I move into the space I’ve created, letting her feel how much I want her. “Park.” She moans loudly and I can’t wait any longer. I push inside her and she pinches her eyes shut as she clings to me.

  “Park,” she sighs and I move quicker, on a mission to keep my name on her lips. Lucy pushes up on her toes, trying to get closer to me. I grip her ass and lift her. As her legs wrap around my hips, I bury myself as deep as I can. She gasps and a small smile forms on her lips. I kiss it because it’s the most perfect thing I’ve ever seen. I want to feel it. Taste it.

  Lucy’s fingers are digging into my shoulders and this little pinch of pain turns me on even more. I hammer into her as she pants against my mouth.

  “Open your eyes, Lucy. I need you to look at me.” It takes her a moment to comply, but when she does, I’m rewarded with that stormy passion I am all too fond of. “Fucking beautiful.”

  She bites down on her lip and I shake my head. “Don’t hold it back.” Her eyes close again as she fights to keep quiet.

  “Lucy,” I groan. “Look at me.” As her eyes pop open I feel her clench around me. “Does it feel good?”

  She nods quickly, her nails cutting into me.

  “Tell me,” I demand.

  Shaking her head, her muscles squeeze, tightening around me until I’m ready to explode.

  “Tell me, Lucy.” Ah. Fuck. I slam into her hard and her gaze locks onto mine.

  “Harder,” she grunts. Jesus. I do what she wants and in return, she gives me exactly what I want. Her head lolls back against the tiled wall and she moans my name loudly as her body quivers around me. I follow her right over the edge, kissing her roughly.

  Lucy touches her fingers to her lips and grins at me. “That was…”

  “Fucking perfect,” I finish for her.

  She nods in agreement. “Fucking perfect.”

  I don’t think I’ve ever heard her drop the F-bomb and for some reason, I find it incredibly hot. I press a kiss to her mouth as she slides her legs down to stand.

  “I’ll see you downstairs,” I say, my lips still on hers.

  She nods, smiling. “Save me a donut.” And then she slaps my ass.

  As I wrap a towel around my waist and go to find my clothes, I can’t help the grin that forms. I pause and huff out a surprised laugh.

  I’m fucking happy.

  ***

  I walk into the apartment and straight into my room to change. When I’m done, I make my way out to the kitchen, and drop myself into a chair for a donut. I notice Jessie watching me. My gaze flicks to Bree as she dunks a cream stick in her Styrofoam cup of coffee.

  “We cool?” Jessie leans forward, resting his arms on the table.

  I look at him for a few seconds. It’s not really a question. It’s more of a request. He’s trying to make peace with me. Hell, I’ve been over it since the moment Lucy’s lips touched my neck. “Yeah. We’re cool.”

  I pull the two remaining cups out of the holder and add cream and sugar to Lucy’s, setting it to the side. “What does Lucy like?” I ask as I flip the lid on the pastel colored box. When I’m met with silence, I look up. Bree’s grinning at me and Jessie’s brows are furrowed in thought.

  “What?”

  “Jelly,” Bree tells me. “The red kind.”

  I pick one out and set it on a napkin next to her coffee before I pluck up a chocolate glaze for myself. Jessie’s still watching me as I take a big bite and knock the lid closed.

  “What?” I ask again, my mouth full. I’m fucking hungry and I’m in a good mood. We’re over the bullshit from last night. I don’t want him to start something new with me now.

  “Nothing,” he says slowly. “You’re just acting weird.”

  I stop mid-chew and cock a brow. “Weird how?” I glance at Bree and her eyes are wide as she looks at Jessie, waiting for his answer.

  He shrugs. “I don’t know. You’re being…nice.”

  I chuckle as I shove another bite in my mouth and try not to take offense to that. “Maybe I’m not as big an asshole as you think I am.”

  “Maybe.” He shakes his head and sips from his cup. “Or maybe you took my advice and got laid.”

  I swallow, nearly choking on the chunk of donut as it catches in my throat. If he only knew what I did with his advice. I smirk at him as I lean back in my seat. “Maybe,” I throw his word back at him because it’s a good non-committal remark.

  Jessie stands and smacks my shoulder. “Well, whatever you’re doing, keep it up. You’re not nearly as pissy as usual.”

  I laugh. “I have full fucking intentions of keeping it up.”

  Bree spits coffee across the table and starts coughing. With a worried expression, Jessie pats her back. “You all right, baby?”

  She nods and then laughs nervously. “Wrong pipe.”

  I hand her a napkin and wink at her. She rolls her eyes.

  This is kind of fun. Too bad Lucy isn’t here so I can mess with her too.

  Right on cue, she comes bouncing into the kitchen and plops down beside me. Her hair is loose and wet. The scent of her shampoo hits me, stirring something inside. She reaches for the cream and I place my hand on top of hers.

  “I already did it.”

  Gray eyes skip over to me. It might not be obvious to anyone else, but I notice the slight flush to her cheeks. I keep my hand in place, circling my fingers over her wrist. Under the table, her foot comes to rest on my leg. My lips twitch as I hold back a grin.

  “Thanks,” she finally says, pulling her hand back.

  “You’re welcome.” With my eyes still on hers, I lick glaze from my finger. I watch her mouth open as she observes my movements. I’m laughing internally as that infamous storm takes root in her gaze.

  Without missing a beat, Lucy sticks her finger deep inside her pastry. Slowly, she brings it up to her mouth, gliding her pink tongue along the side before wrapping her lips completely around her finger. With a little gro
an, she licks every bit of jelly off. “Mm. That’s so good.”

  “Jesus, Lulu,” Jessie chokes. “Don’t do that kind of shit.”

  She flinches like she forgot he was in the room. Hell, I forgot about him for a second too.

  Bree bursts out laughing, and as her amused gaze rakes over both me and Lucy, I know it’s at both our expense. In a quick motion, she glides her chair back, and takes Jessie’s hand. “Take me to your room. Lucy just gave me all sorts of ideas.”

  With a deep growl, Jessie throws Bree over his shoulder, and rubs his hand over her thigh. “I take it back, Lu. Do that shit anytime you want.”

  I watch them leave the kitchen and then I turn slowly to face Lucy. “You are in so much trouble,” I state darkly.

  “Oh, I hope so,” she breathes, making me go instantly hard for her.

  I swear the room grows hotter as we stare each other down. Several heartbeats pass before I launch myself at her. I pull her out of the chair and grip her ass with both hands before I kiss her. We stumble back into the wall and her fingers twist into my hair, holding me firmly in place. I don’t know where the hell she thinks I’m going. There is nowhere else I’d rather be at the moment.

  “Just so you know,” she pants in between kisses, “I’m not usually like this.”

  I pull back enough to look at her and I smirk. “Like what?”

  “This…” She shakes her head, searching for the right word, so I decide to help her out.

  I suck her earlobe into my mouth as I push my hips into her. “Horny?”

  “God. Yes.”

  I chuckle. “Lucy, I’m not judging you, but if I were, I wouldn’t be thinking anything bad.”

  Working her fingers under my shirt, she grazes her teeth along my throat, nipping me gently. Holy shit. That feels so good.

  “I blame you,” she mumbles, he nails skimming across my stomach.

  “Fuck,” I hiss. I pull her head back and crash my mouth down on hers. I don’t know if I’ve ever kissed a girl like this. I literally cannot get enough. My tongue moves frantically, drinking from her. I want her taste in my mouth permanently. By the time I pull back to catch my breath, we’re both at that point where it’s nearly impossible to turn back.

  “I don’t think I can take the blame all myself,” I say, my voice thick, husky. “You affect me just as much, if not more.”

  Lucy opens her mouth to respond and the buzzer sounds. We both jump at the shrill noise and I glare at the wall. Whoever the hell just interrupted us is going to pay dearly.

  21

  Lucy

  “Shit,” Park grunts. “Hold that thought.” He moves around me, heading for the living room. I pick up my donut and peek around the corner. I watch as he swings the door open.

  Two things happen simultaneously.

  Park’s entire body noticeably tenses and he says a name that makes my heart clench in my chest.

  “Hope.”

  I can’t see her because Park’s body is blocking the doorway. My stomach churns. He isn’t moving. I’m not even sure he’s breathing. I need to see her. I need to know what she looks like. This girl that affects him in so many ways.

  Dropping my donut in the trash, I push myself forward. I can’t make sense of all the questions swimming through my head. Why is she here? Why won’t he move? Why does she have this effect on him? Is he in love with her? Does she want him back? Does he want her? What does this mean for us?

  It must only take me seconds to get to him, but it feels like forever. I pause just behind him and reach out, touching the tips of my fingers to his taut shoulder. He jumps and almost steps into me. He’s purposely blocking me and I don’t understand why.

  “Can we come in?” Guy asks.

  I lean around Park’s arm and wave them in. As Hope steps inside, my eyes trail over her, and my confidence takes a major hit. She’s pretty. Really pretty. If I was a lesbian, she’d be my type, pretty. It’s her uniqueness I think—the dark hair, streaked with a deep blue, the gauges in her earlobes, the old band tee shirt that hugs her torso perfectly. She’s small and feminine, but has this badass vibe going on.

  “What are you doing here?” Park asks quietly. His body is still wound tight. I’d know that even if I wasn’t touching him. His whole demeanor says: Get the fuck out.

  “We were in the neighborhood?” Guy says, but it sounds like a question. He smiles as he shrugs. “Hey Lucy-Lu.”

  “Hi,” I rasp.

  Park glances down at me before shifting his gaze to Hope. She sighs and does this little half wave thing. “Hi. I’m Hope.”

  I swallow, stepping away from Park, and extend my hand. “Lucy,” I say as we shake. “My friends call me Lulu or—”

  “You can call her Lucy,” Park states.

  My head whips back to look at him. His eyes are hard and focused on Hope—who by the way, does not seem like a threat in the least. She actually seems pretty nice. All the questions come storming back in.

  “Not that you don’t have a spectacular…foyer,” Guy says flatly, “but can we maybe move into the living room and sit down or something?”

  “No,” Park spits. I would be squirming under his glare, but Hope ignores him completely. I don’t know what to say. He’s being really rude, but I don’t know the details of their history. Maybe he has a right to be. But I can’t imagine Guy bringing her here to upset Park, either. This isn’t my apartment, but my manners take over.

  “Come on into the kitchen. There’re donuts.”

  Park shoots me an unhappy look and I bite my lip. He shakes his head and looks away. “You can’t stay here,” he murmurs.

  “You’ve been avoiding me,” Hope says.

  He’s good at avoiding people. He’s done it to me.

  “A normal person would assume I wouldn’t want to see them,” he fires back.

  Hope shrugs one shoulder. “I’m not normal.”

  “I don’t want you here.” He says it so harshly that I flinch.

  “Too bad,” Hope grinds out. “I’m only home for a little bit longer and I missed you. Quit being a dickhead.”

  Park pats his jean pockets and sighs in frustration. “You don’t get to tell me what to do.” With that, he pivots on his heel, and stalks off to his room.

  “Well that went better than I expected,” Guy breathes.

  Hope grins at him. “Progress.” She turns back to me. “You said there were donuts?”

  “Uh…yeah. Um, in the…the kitchen.” I point a thumb over my shoulder. I’m at a complete loss for words.

  “Chocolate?” she asks.

  I shake my head. “I don’t know.”

  Guy tugs on my hand, pulling me after him. “Where’s Jessie?”

  “He’s with Bree. In his room.”

  He chuckles. “Ah. He’s busy then.” I watch as he and Hope each take a seat before I follow. I’m more than a little confused as to what exactly is happening, and I’m majorly uncomfortable.

  “So you’re Lucy,” Hope states. She sits back with a chocolate cream stick, watching me closely.

  “So you’re Hope,” I say.

  She smirks at me before taking a bite. “So I am.”

  “Lulu and Park do not have feelings for each other,” Guy explains. “Isn’t that right, Lu?”

  I just stare at him. I have no clue how to answer that. How do I feel about Park? I have no idea. Especially now. His whole reaction to Hope screams unresolved feelings. All I do know is my heart feels broken. My stomach feels sick. And I am seriously lost right now.

  “I should go check on Park,” I finally reply.

  “He’s smoking,” Hope tells me as she finishes off her last bite.

  How does she know that?

  Picking up a napkin, she takes her time cleaning her fingers, and then looks at me. Like really looks at me. I fidget under her piercing scrutiny. “I can see it.”

  “See what?” I ask.

  “Why he likes you.”

  “Who?”

 
She grins. “Whatever he told you about me, it’s all true. It’s just not as bad as he makes it sound. Different points of view, ya know?”

  I shake my head slowly. “He hasn’t told me anything really.”

  Hope lifts a brow. “What do you want to know?”

  I blink. “Everything.” Then I shake my head yet again. “No. Nothing. Not about you and him. He should tell me that.”

  Guy makes a noise and my eyes flick to him. He smiles weakly at me. “He’s not going to tell you.”

  “Why?”

  “Because,” Park says from the doorway, “it’s ancient history.” He folds his arms in front of his chest and glares at the floor. “Go home, Lucy.”

  “Stop being an ass,” Hope whispers.

  Park smiles at her, but it’s cold, unfriendly, and it sends a chill down my back. “You can go home, too, Hope.”

  “Fine,” she says. “I’ll go to Lucy’s. We can get to know each other.”

  Park is across the room so quickly I don’t even register his movement until he’s between me and Hope. “Stay the fuck away from her,” he seethes.

  “I’m not going to contaminate her,” Hope throws back.

  “You contaminate everything you touch,” he shouts. Hope rears back at that as if he hit her.

  “Park,” Guy warns with just one word.

  Without taking his eyes off of Hope, Park steps back. “Fuck it. I’ll leave. You all have a nice visit.”

  I sit dumbfounded, unable to do anything but watch as he walks away.

  What the hell just happened? I close my eyes for a moment and take a shaky