Shattering Zoella's Demons

“It’s nothing to worry about,” Demetrius said.

  “Do you want to come in, or are you allergic to heiress homes as well?” Zoe asked stepping aside to allow him in.

  “I can stomach it for a while,” Demetrius said with a smile.

  “How nice of you,” Zoe said, she closed the door and led the way upstairs.

  She was glad for the distraction. Thinking about the people in the garden right now was too exhausting. Demetrius Avinoff would make the day bearable.

  “I have something to show you. A musician like you will appreciate it.”

  “Please, by all means, show me,” Demetrius said as they went up the second flight of stairs.

  Demetrius couldn’t help admiring his surroundings. The house was beautifully furnished. It reminded him of an old castle in history books. The woman leading the way with her long hair and gorgeous dress would be the damsel in distress. She had looked the part when she’d first opened the door. He’d wanted to hold her and comfort her. He couldn’t help wondering where the man who’d given her the ring was.

  Why would he let her be so unhappy?

  Strange how he always went for the tortured ones, it would be so easy to fall in love with Zoe Castille.

  Zoe led him to the large ball room on the third floor. Years before, Thaddeus had helped her perfect the acoustics in the room. They’d then bought a grand piano and placed it in the middle of the room. Sometimes she liked to come up here and play it for hours on end.

  “Wow,” Demetrius said when he saw the piano. “Do you want to make me move in?”

  Zoe smiled. “I want to play music with you, are you game?”

  “Is that a proposition?” Demetrius teased as he moved to sit on the bench and open the cover. The keys gleamed, tantalizing him to place his fingers on them. He did and the sound of it thrilled him.

  Zoe smiled at his reaction and sat beside him, running a hand over the keys herself, she said, “Light tones, full of spring and summer promise, have you ever noticed that when you play any of Debussy’s music it feels like a beginning?”

  Demetrius flashed a grin, and then ran his fingers over the keys in fast practice.

  “I think he is too much of a romantic, and we ignore a lot of the modern classics. I especially love Zoella Mya’s Angel’s falling. Why don’t we play that? The violin on that piece is beautiful.”

  Zoe stared at him for a moment then she dropped her fingers. “She might be a bit too emotional—

  “She might be, but she is a genius, music is meant to be on the edge,” Demetrius said, playing the opening sequence of angel’s falling. “This melody suits a summer afternoon, in Athens, in a sunlit ballroom, with the sea breeze floating in to tantalize our minds and hearts reminding us we need to live.”

  Zoe laughed at that. “Don’t write poetry, Demetrius. It might scare off a lot of people

  He grinned, and continued playing the angel’s falling with such an open interpretation she found herself sitting still and listening to him play.

  It suddenly didn’t hurt to listen to music. It certainly kept her memories away and she couldn’t move from the bench if she wanted to.

  *****

  “Sarah, Terry, why don’t you go to the kitchen and have some ice cream,” Athena said once dessert was served.

  She wanted to talk and what she had to say would be inappropriate for the two children. Instructing a waiter to help, she smiled as the two rushed off in excitement to the kitchen.

  “Why is it so hard to connect with Zoe?” Gabriella asked as soon as the children were earshot. “I feel as though we are just part of the furniture. She’s not caving.”

  “It won’t happen overnight.” Kenny reminded her. “Besides, I think she’s stressing right now. Too much is happening at the same time.”

  “Uncle Thad, tell her to go for the hearing.” Jessica suggested. Everyone could see the respect Zoe had for the older man. “She listens to you

  “Give her time, Jessica,” Thaddeus said.

  “Time is running out,” Julia pointed out.

  “She won’t go if you confront her,” Danny said to that. “She’s digesting our presence here, wait a while before you start pushing agendas. Have her seat through a meal with us before we can even try to talk to her.”

  “Easy for you to say, she’s speaking to you,” Gabriella said with a sigh.

  “Zoe has a difficult time accepting that you’re all here. This is her comfort zone; we should try to understand that. Also, I think I’ll avoid any more lunches like this one,” Athena said.

  “Good plan,” Thad said smiling at his wife. “I’m afraid we’ll drive my niece to drink.”

  Everyone laughed at that and the mood lightened immediately. It was punctuated by the sound of waves at the beach, followed by music that floated in and out. Athena felt as though it were possible to move forward. Zoe might have been unable to last through dessert but everyone else was still here. It was a good sign.

  *****

  A week after the lunch Zoe preferred not to think about it, Zoe walked along the beach with Zan at her side, occasionally bending to pick a shell. Her feet were bare and the wind kept whipping her pale green skirts against her knees.

  “I got one!” Zan exclaimed holding up a medium sized white shell with black dots on it. “It’s empty.”

  “That makes how many?” Zoe asked crouching before him to check it and make sure it was empty.

  “Ten today,” Zan said with a smile. “Zoe, will you come with me to the store to buy a kite.”

  Zoe sat down on the sand, handing the shell back to Zan. She watched him put it into a little bag he had over his shoulder.

  “We can make a kite, Zan.”

  “But the one Nanny Zelda and I made didn’t work,” Zan complained.

  “Oh,” Zoe smiled, “you can make one with me. I know an expert who can help.”

  “Really, will it fly high and higher?” Zan asked excited.

  “Of course,” Zoe promised. She was instantly rewarded with a hug. Slender arms wrapping around her neck tightly, “there now, it will be okay.”

  “What are you guys doing?” Terry asked, interrupting the moment.

  Zoe looked up to see him standing a few feet away in his swimming costume, his twin sister beside him also in hers. They obviously wanted to join in and Zoe realized that she hadn’t been particularly welcoming where they were concerned.

  Zan pulled back and looked at the twins.

  “We’re going to make a kite,” Zan said excited. “Do you know how to fly one?”

  “Sure. I even know how to make one.” Terry boasted.

  “Show me,” Zan ordered.

  “No way, we’ll see who can make a better one,” Terry said, just as bossily.

  “Fine, Zoe knows an expert,” Zan boasted right back.

  Sarah shook her head at her brother’s boasts. “I can help you guys.”

  Zoe met her gaze, “You can make one?”

  “Sure,” Sarah said confidently.

  “Hey, you’re supposed to be on my side,” Terry complained.

  “It’s a kite; you’re making it into a competition with a seven-year-old,” Sarah pointed out.

  “So what,” Terry shrugged

  “Boys,” Sarah rolled her eyes and came to sit beside Zoe. “When do we get started?”

  Zoe glanced at her wrist watch. “It’s almost ten o’clock. I have an appointment I must keep. This afternoon will be good. I’ll have Tony help me get the supplies.”

  “Cool,” Sarah said watching as Zoe stood up. She wanted to ask more questions but held her tongue. It was enough that they’d be doing something later.

  Zoe leaned down to Zan.

  “I’ve got to go agape mou,” she said in Greek. “I’ll be back soon.”

  “Promise,” Zan said looking up with clear blue eyes.

  Zoe smiled.

  “I promise kiddo,” she replied in English. Th
ey encouraged Zan to talk both languages so that he would learn quickly.

  “A kiss for the road,” Zoe asked bending closer.

  Zan grinned and dropped kisses on Zoe’s dimples, where she liked it the most. Ruffling his hair, Zoe waved at the twins and started up to the house. Nanny Zelda, who’d been tanning in the sun, sat up and waved goodbye.

  “Zoe’s so hot,” Terry said, watching her leave. “I could date her.”

  “You’re fourteen,” Sarah scoffed. “Would it kill you to be less of a pain?”

  “You mean like you who is kissing ass?” Terry asked. “I’ve gone for a swim.”

  God, she could kill him sometimes, Sarah thought. Her gaze went back to the retreating figure that was Zoe. She’d make friends with her, she decided.

  ****

  Breakfast was always a prolonged occasion in all Castille homes. It wasn’t a surprise to find Julia, Gabriella and Jessica in the dining room when Zoe walked in. Cringing inside, she headed for the side table and picked up a napkin.

  “Morning Zoe,” Gabriella said as cheerfully as possible. Zoe had actively been avoiding being anywhere close to her or Julia in the past week. “Did you sleep okay?”

  “Just fine,” Zoe said, although she’d barely clocked an hour.

  The nightmares were always so close these days. She picked up two madeleines and wrapped them in the napkin.

  “Won’t you have breakfast with us?” Julia asked, hopeful.

  “No, I have an appointment,” Zoe said turning to head out.

  “How about lunch,” Gabriella said.

  “If I can,” Zoe said leaving the room quickly before they asked about dinner.

  Gabriella sighed as Zoe’s footsteps faded. “I don’t think we’re ever going to penetrate that shield.”

  “At least she talked to you,” Julia said quietly.

  Jessica stood up and excused herself. She rushed after her sister and caught up with her just as she was at the front door.

  “Zoe, wait up,” Jessica said. Once they were face to face she said, “The least you can do is try.”

  “What are you talking about?” Zoe asked with a frown.

  “Mum is reaching out to you,” Jessica said nodding toward the dining room. “You’re not going to ignore it forever, are you?”

  “I’m not sure I care to listen to you,” Zoe said with a frown. “I really must go right now, I’m late.”

  “Can’t it keep?” Jessica asked. “Spend the day with us.”

  “No,” Zoe answered. “I’m going to see a shrink. I think that might be more important than spending the day in stress.”

  Jessica sighed at the answer and watched as Zoe simply hurried out to a waiting car. If only she were magical…if only…

  ****

  “You’re angry,” Sylvia Hellinski said studying Zoe as the young woman paced the length of her office. “Why?”

  “Why?” Zoe scoffed. “How can you ask me that? Haven’t you been listening to me?”

  “I am listening, but right now, I can only assume the answers. Just because your aunt and uncle are hosting your family doesn’t mean you should be angry,” Sylvia said.

  “How easy it all sounds for you, “Zoe cursed under her breath. “I know you want me to spell it out.”

  “Then do so,” Sylvia said quietly. “Voice it out for me.”

  “I’m pissed that they all expect me to start being nice when they’ve only been tolerant of me. I don’t want to have normal conversations with them. I don’t want to be cordial. I want to scream and be angry!” Zoe said. “I don’t want to hope that things could get better between us.”

  “Having said all of that, of which you’re entitled, Zoe, more than anyone, tell me how you really feel,” Sylvia said leaning back in her chair. “Deep down inside, where you’re not lying to yourself.”

  Zoe stopped pacing to meet Sylvia’s green gaze. “Don’t make me say it.”

  “You need to,” Sylvia said firmly, “to be able to get through this. You’re going to have to admit what you do feel.”

  “Sylvia,” Zoe said, shaking her head.

  She’d been fighting the emotions inside her for a while now. Ever since her entire family had shown up in Greece, saying they loved her and that they were going to give her the support she needed to go to testify.

  Hopes she’d long squelched were rising again. Her heart yearned for things she’d long given up on. She wanted to give in but the fear that she would be unable to face Steve Harden and as a result endure another betrayal paralyzed her.

  Letting out a short sigh, she sat on the couch, and stared at the carpeted floor.

  “I want to be with my family. I want them to love me how I love them, no matter what happened before,” Zoe said her voice almost a whisper.

  Looking up, her eyes glittering with unshed tears she said, “But it scares me what will happen when they realize how much of a coward I really am. I just can’t face that monster, and that’s why they are all here. I can’t handle failing them again.”

  *****

  Kenny managed to convince Tony, Zoe’s bodyguard that he’d take care of her after her appointment and get her home. He sat in a black Aston Martin Vanquish waiting for Zoe to emerge from the large corporate building that belonged to Castille Media, Greece.

  The first four floors were rented out to various businesses and he knew that Dr. Sylvia Hellinski’s practice was on the fourth floor. When Zoe had been living here before, he’d waited for her many times at this same exact spot.

  The dashboard clock changed and it was now midday. Zoe strolled out of the building, big dark sunglasses over her pixie face, her hair loose around her. She looked pretty today in a green skirt and a sleeveless white top. Her feet were in strappy sandals.

  She walked toward the car sedately, seeming unconcerned about the heat that was bothering everyone else today.

  Kenny leaned on the driver’s door to wait for her.

  “What did you do with Tony?” Zoe greeted as she came to him.

  “I gave him a day off,” Kenny said, grinning at her. “I told him you’d be safe with me.”

  “Hmm, and he believed you?” Zoe asked with a lift of her brow, accepting a hug from him. “Where’s your wife?”

  “At home,” Kenny said walking her around the car to open the door for her. “I’m taking you to lunch.”

  “Hmm…, shopping first,” Zoe said as he closed the door and hurried around to the driver’s side.

  “I have to get supplies,” she said when he was settled in the driver’s seat. “Zan wants to make a kite.”

  “A kite, you’re not the expert on that if I recall,” Kenny teased as he started the car.

  “No, but you are,” Zoe said with a grin, “so is Danny. I’m going to commandeer your help so my little cousin can love me more.”

  “You’re shameless,” Kenny said with a laugh.

  “I am,” Zoe acknowledged. “May I ask why the lunch?”

  “Because you’re special,” Kenny tried for flattery. When she gave him a skeptical look, he sighed. “We need to talk. You and I should never ever stay angry with each other.”

  “I’m not angry with you,” Zoe said turning to look out the window.

  “Well, then I am angry with you,” Kenny said quietly. “I needed explanations you refused to give them; I have explanations you need to listen to.”

  Zoe looked at him. “Oh really, I’ll go first. Tell me, why would you let your wife and my mother ambush me like this? You know we don’t get along.”

  “Because you left me in the dark,” Kenny said his tone accusing. “How could you break it off with McClaire that way? You didn’t warn me. Me, Zoe, I’m your oldest friend. Do you know how hurt I felt?”

  “Kenny,” she stopped and swallowed remembering that hellish week. “I’m sorry. I just—, I wanted to fix things fast. You’ve helped me so many times—

  “What made thi
s time different?” Kenny asked. “You didn’t think I’d be upset about that bastard’s release?”

  “I was in shock! Do you imagine that I wanted to hurt you?” Zoe asked her frayed emotions making her voice waver. “I was scared out of my mind. The only thing I could think was to get away and make sure Robbie didn’t come looking. It would be terrible if he knew the truth.”

  “You could have called,” Kenny said. “I’d have helped.”

  “I could have,” Zoe said. “But your first reaction would have been to stay with me. More secrets to keep from Jess and Robbie, it’s not fair to have expected it of you.”

  “I—,” Kenny broke off, shaking his head against the truth of those words. Stopping at a light, he looked at Zoe, realizing her actions had given him back his marriage. But still—, “I was frantic with worry.”

  “I knew you’d be,” Zoe said. “I almost called you. So many times I picked up the phone, I just couldn’t.”

  “Why did you tell Robbie you’re in love with Franco?” Kenny asked. “I almost went to Italy to beat that bastard. How could he go along with it?”

  “Franco is loyal to me, Kenny,” Zoe said. “He will do what I ask. Besides, the only thing that would hurt Robbie enough to leave me was cheating on him.”

  “How did you know?” Kenny asked, navigating through traffic to a mall where they could buy the kite supplies.

  Zoe ran a hand through her hair.

  “The first time Robbie and I met, he thought you and I were having an affair. It drove him nuts. He told me off, warned me to stay away from you and not break your marriage to Jess. It was a mess.”

  “Wow, how come you never told me this?” Kenny asked in surprise as he parked the car in the mall parking lot. “I thought you two met at my wedding?”

  “We did. He overheard our conversation in the drawing room. He assumed I was your mistress and that’s why I was upset. It was kind of amusing if he hadn’t mattered to me so much. This all happened during your honeymoon. We accidentally ran into each other in Australia and ended up clearing things up but I’ve always known since then that Robbie would hate being cheated on.”

  “But Zoe—

  “Don’t,” Zoe cut him off. “I can’t discuss Robbie right now, anything else but him.”

  "You still love him,” Kenny stated. “I can see it.”

  “And you shall keep quiet about it,” Zoe said firmly, opening her door and sliding out of the car. Closing the door, she took in a deep breath as memories of a love she could never have flooded her. She missed Robbie terribly. It hurt to breathe just thinking about it.