Whispers of a Faded Dreamer

  One morning, when I slipped into my house to have a bowl of cereal before school, I found Matthew sitting at the kitchen table.

  “What are you doing here? I didn’t see Mom’s car in the driveway.”

  “I’m eleven now so I can stay home alone.”

  “Oh.” It had been a long time since we had spoken. I didn’t remember having even seen the kid in the last month. “But don’t you have school or something?”

  “I told Mom that I was sick so I could stay home.” On the table, by his plate, were the wrappings of three pop tarts and a chocolate covered granola bar.

  “Are you sick?”

  He looked away from me, out the window. “No.”

  I grabbed a bowl from the cupboard and set it on the counter. Matthew didn’t say anything more. I could understand wanting to skip school but I was kind of surprised that he had lied to Mom. I turned and opened the high cupboard above the stove. I dumped sugary puffs into the bowl.

  “Why did you tell Mom you were sick?” I asked, finally.

  “I asked her why I couldn’t see them, like you could. At school, they said that the talent is hereditary, that it runs in families.”

  “Not everyone who can see it is in the same family. People all over the world are Dreamers.”

  “I know that.” He was pouting. “Mom told me that you were adopted.”

  “Oh.” I took milk from the fridge and sloshed some into the bowl.

  “You knew that already?” he asked.

  “Yeah, I found out a few years ago. It kind of explains things, don’t you think?” I said, gesturing to my red hair.

  Matthew laughed. I sat down with him at the table.

  “I was really mad when I found out. I’ve always been really mad that she was so mean to you. Now I find out it’s because she sees it like you’re not her real kid.”

  “She said that?”

  “No.” He looked down and then away from me. “It just seemed like that when she was talking.”

  “Don’t be mad for my sake, Matthew.” I reached across the table and squeezed his hand. “I’ve forgiven her and I think I’m okay now.” He looked up at me and I smiled. Then I started eating. I was starved. Working at the clinic, I sometimes forgot about the mundane, such as actually eating real-life food.

  “Really? You’re okay?” Our eyes locked. He was nicer than I remembered.

  “I’m okay, Matthew. Thanks for caring. You’re developing into a kind, young man. I’m proud to call you my brother.”

  He blushed and looked away. “Thanks.”

  “You have a cell phone now, right?”

  He nodded. “Yeah, it’s super-cool. Thanks, by the way. I figure Mom’s probably buying it with your money.”

  “Sure, no problem. I have a cell now too. Let’s exchange numbers.” I pulled my phone from my pocket and so did he. We exchanged numbers and then I finished my cereal. “See you next time,” I said as I was heading out the door to school.

  “Sure thing.” He grinned at me.

  Before I was off the doorstep, my phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out and saw a message from Matthew. A happy face with the tongue sticking out. I laughed as I shoved the phone back into my pocket. I was glad to have had the opportunity to connect with him. It was nice having a little brother, after all.

  Early that evening, when I lay down at the Peaceful Sleep Clinic, I was relieved to be closing my eyes on the day. School was such a pointless waste of time. Some people there were so annoying. I was glad I only had Bryce in one of my classes this semester. He was as boisterous as ever. I didn’t know why the sound of his voice bothered me. Why couldn’t I just be happy he was happy? If he was happy. It’s not like he had harmed me or tried to harm me. Bryce didn’t pick on me or anything. He just left me alone. Just like I had asked him to.

  ***

  I wore an old-fashioned dress and was standing on a beach. I thought we were going to have to swim but it seemed Bryce had other plans. He took me by the elbow and pulled me across the beach to a patch of long grass. There we found a small, very old-looking, wooden boat. Perhaps we might still have to swim, after all!

  Letting go of me, Bryce began to drag the boat from the greenery. His shoulder-length hair fell forward, covering his attractive features as he bent down, pulling the boat. I cast a furtive glance back at my house. All was still. What were we doing? He had never acted like this before…had he? I thought of walking away. Or running. Would he come after me? Why was I was afraid? I wasn’t afraid of Bryce, was I? We were in love…right? He had said that this was the only way we would be able to be together. And I wanted that, didn’t I? Yes, I wanted to be with him. But, somehow, I still felt afraid.

  The boat was in the water now, being tossed about by the large swells.

  “Get in,” he commanded. His dark brown eyes looked back up to the house we had just left.

  I pursed my lips and hesitated. Why does he always have to come on so strong? I’m not a dog! But some part of my heart urged me to hurry. I clambered into the boat. I didn’t want to miss my chance with him. We could work out the details once we were safely away, enjoying our happily-ever-after.

  Bryce’s muscles tensed at the oars as he pulled the boat out into deeper water. We had left in such a hurry that his white shirt was unbuttoned to the waist and the wind pushed it back, exposing his chest. I felt a blush rising on my cheeks and looked away, out over the water. His physical beauty wasn’t what bound my heart to his, though. He had noticed me. I wasn’t used to being noticed. He talked to me like I was the only woman in existence. And he loved me. But my father wouldn’t let him court me because he had been found washed up on the beach. No title. No money. Not the right sort of fellow to marry into the family. So Bryce had asked me to run away with him, back to where he had come from.

  “Is your island as beautiful as you say?” I asked, still averting my eyes.

  “My home is very beautiful.”

  “Is it really close enough that we can get to it with this boat?”

  “Yes. It won’t be long now.”

  We had awoken very early to make good our escape, before anyone else woke up. Now I was tired and anxious. But I felt safe with Bryce, didn’t I? Wait…should I feel safe with him? At least I was an excellent swimmer, should anything happen. My eyelids felt heavy. I let them close and leaned forward, placing my elbows on my knees. The waves rocked me to sleep.

  When I awoke, I was very hot. I opened my eyes to see Bryce had stopped rowing. I put my hand to my muzzy head and blinked the sleep from my eyes.

  “Are we lost?”

  “No.” There were tears in Bryce’s eyes. As he met my gaze, they spilled out and ran down his cheeks.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked. I’d never seen him cry before.

  “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

  I shuffled towards him and knelt in the bottom of the boat at his feet. Taking his hands in mine, I looked up into his eyes. All of a sudden, it was like darkness was living there. A shudder ran up my spine.

  “I’ve done something terrible,” he said, averting his gaze.

  “What have you done?”

  “I’ve made a woman believe that I loved her so that I could lure her out to her death.”

  I looked down at our hands, still entwined, as fear rose up my throat. “Why would you do that?” My eyes filled with tears. “You mean me, don’t you?” My voice caught and I couldn’t control the tears running down my face.

  He nodded but said, “It’s complicated.” Bryce didn’t pull his hands away and he held my gaze.

  “So… you didn’t feel anything for me? You don’t love me?” I asked.

  “No.” He shifted in his seat uncomfortably. “I’m sorry.”

  “But you were so…charming.”

  “Yes. That’s what we do.”

  “What we do?” I echoed, confused.

  “Yes.” He pulled one hand away and gestured out over the water.

  “Oh!” I
gasped. Over the side of the boat, three beautiful faces peered up from under the water. They broke the surface. Women. No. Mermaids.

  “You see, males occur very infrequently with our kind. Many think we are…undesirable. Some of my sisters put a curse on me to make me human. But they promised that they would undo the curse and let me return to our kingdom if I lured a human to its death.”

  “Brother, you have returned.” A beautiful blonde mermaid swam to the side of the boat.

  “Yes. Here she is.”

  He leaned over, grabbed me by the hips and tipped me into the sea. It happened so quickly that I didn’t even resist. I cried out as I spilled into the frigid water. I surfaced and started swimming away, which was difficult in a long dress, now heavy with seawater. Then I looked back to see what was happening.

  The blond mermaid laughed, a harsh, metallic-like sound. “Did you really think we’d take you back? No. I think we’ll eat you instead. Human.” She laughed again as she pushed down on the edge of the boat with such great force that it flipped over, knocking him into the water.

  I saw that the boat had righted itself and swam for its safety while the mermaids were preoccupied with Bryce. With great effort, I flung myself over the side of the rowboat and managed to pull myself in. Bryce was fighting back but it didn’t look like he would last very long against them. One oar was still close by, floating in the water. I reached out and fished it out of the drink easily. The other oar had drifted some distance away. I paddled towards it and then strained out over the water to reach it. Just as I touched it with my fingertips, the current tugged the boat forward so that I almost swept right past it. I reached back and snatched the second oar up out of the water.

  I looked around. No one was visible above the surface of the water. My eyes filled with tears. He didn’t love me but what a horrible way to go.

  At the sound of a splash, I turned and saw Bryce surface only a few feet from the boat. He was still alive! Without hesitation, I reached out an oar to him. He latched onto it. I hauled him closer and, using all my strength, heaved him up into the little boat. His shirt was gone and there were vicious-looking bite marks on his shoulders and back. He fumbled to get himself seated. One of the mermaids surfaced beside the boat. I lifted one of the heavy oars and cracked her over the head as hard as I could.

  “You’ll not be eating me!” I yelled. Another came up out of the water and I served her the same treatment. After conking all three of them, I thrust the oars into the oarlocks. Blood was oozing from Bryce’s mouth. He stared vacantly as if looking through me.

  “ROW!” I roared.

  He didn’t respond. I kicked him in the shin. “Row to land!” I pointed to where I could just see the coast. “Row or move so I can do it!” I shoved him. He resisted me but took the oars. Mechanically, he began to row towards land with powerful, quick strokes.

  I looked back out over the water where they had been. Nothing.

  It was more than an hour before we reached the shore. Bryce didn’t speak or look at me.

  When we reached land, he got out and dragged the boat up onto the beach.

  “We could have had a life together,” I said quietly.

  “I’m a fool. Such a fool.” He looked into my eyes. Tears spilled over onto his cheeks. “I’m sorry.” He choked on the words.

  “I forgive you. But I think it will be for the best if you don’t come back to the house with me.”

  He nodded and then reached for my hand. I let him hold it and he knelt in the sand before me.

  “Thank you for saving my life. If you ever want me, I am yours. You’re the only one who was ever truly kind to me.”

  My resolve wavered for a moment. Even after everything, I still loved him, still wanted him. But then I pulled my hand away.

  “If you court me in a proper way and, if my father agrees, then perhaps, one day, I will marry you.”

  He stood, wet sand clinging to his pants. “Is that what you want? Or would you prefer to never see me again?”

  A small smile crept to my lips. “I enjoyed your attention. You were so clever and sweet. If you want to pursue me, then you should. But only if you want to. I won’t hold what you’ve done against you.”

  He smiled back at me. “I do want to. With an honest heart this time. You are a worthy woman. Better than I deserve. I’m going to go and find purpose. When I come back, I will be a man that your father would accept into the family.”

  “Goodbye,” I said.

  He took my hand and kissed the back of it. “Until we meet again.”

  ***

  I woke up laughing, actually laughing, which was a first. That was a good one! Imagine! First trying to feed me to his evil kin and then begging for my hand in marriage! That’s what came of thinking of Bryce right before bed. Still laughing, I sat up and clambered out of bed. Now I totally deserve the raise I got last week. That dream was seriously awesome! And so funny! I was still laughing as I walked down the hall to the bathroom.

  Chapter 8 – The Darkness Comes Out

  It was finally summer holidays. I had done okay on my finals and was glad to be rid of school for a couple of months. Most high school kids get jobs in the summer. Only I already had a job. My work was sleeping. I didn’t see the point of getting another job. Even though I was giving Mom the biggest chunk of my paycheck, I was still making more money than I knew what to do with. I didn’t like spending time at home. So, mostly, I ate out.

  As for what to do with all my free time, I decided to spend the long summer days at a library near the clinic. I’d always loved reading, but I’d never had much time for it because I used to take school so seriously. Between reading and dreaming, I got to be in a different world most of the time, which suited me just fine. I loved the ideas swirling around in my head. Adventure, all the time. Even though I was alone, I wasn’t lonely.

  Matthew and I texted back and forth. He liked reading too and would download the books I recommended onto his tablet. Once a week or so, we’d go to the beach and swim together. Matthew said that Mom still spent most of her time at the hospital. So it was kind of nice that Matthew had me. We were family.

  I was glad to have a break from seeing the kids at school. It would be great when I graduated next year and that part of my life would be over for good. Even though I didn’t see him, I kept dreaming of Bryce. I was drawn to him at some subconscious level, I guess. But I tried not to over-analyze it. They’re just dreams, I told myself.

  The summer months sped by. School started again. I took to reading in class. None of the teachers seemed to mind. It was like we were all just waiting for the time to pass. I felt kind of sorry for the teachers. What a way to live.

  My favorite time of day was in the evening, when I could finally settle down under the covers in my cot at the clinic. With my tight sleep cap on my head, I felt like I was entering the important part of my life.

  ***

  I loved watching the sunset. Too bad this one might be my last. Sadness and fear weighed heavily on me. I sat against the rough brick wall of a tall building, near the edge of the city, looking into the sky above the Interstate highway. He’s dead. I blinked away the tears that blurred my vision. The sparse clouds were like pink cotton candy in the ever-darkening sky, the last rays of the sun providing a dying warmth, like a final embrace. So far, I had managed to elude those who came out after dark. But now I was alone. Dennis had killed himself today while I slept - abandoning me. I tried not to hate him. The situation looked hopeless all right. And I was so tired. I wondered, briefly, about giving up, too. But that would be wrong. I didn’t want this to be the last time I saw the light. When I pushed myself up to a standing position against the rough bricks, my ankle hurt a little but, at least, I wasn’t injured badly. Soon it would be time to run.

  It was ironic. I had to live like them, asleep during the day and awake at night. But if I slept outside, under the light of the sun, I was perfectly safe. Light was safety. It was during the ni
ght that I had to be alert - to make sure they didn’t catch me, didn’t touch me. These weren’t brain-eating zombies, like in silly horror movies. This sickness spread through physical contact alone; no bite was necessary to spread the disease. But they were aggressive.

  I limped away from the buildings, out onto the exit that led to the Interstate. My foot was just a little stiff. I’d still be able to run. Wide-open roads were the safest places to be, especially at night. The ones who ventured out after dark seemed to have an aversion to open spaces.

  I was almost to the Interstate now, the buildings behind me. Military personnel had cleared the highways of all derelict cars several weeks ago. Dennis and I had waved at them for help but the armored vehicles had fired warning shots in our direction. I had cried in frustration. We hadn’t seen anyone on the road since then. No one drove anymore. Where was there to go? Or maybe there was no one left who knew how to drive. The disease left people unable to speak or to recognize anyone they had known. Both their gross and fine motor control deteriorated. They were able to function only at the most basic level, like animals. Dennis didn’t want that so he had chosen death instead. I blinked back tears and tried to stop thinking about finding his lifeless body that afternoon when I woke up. Have to stay alert. I scanned about in all directions as I walked. They weren’t out yet.

  First, there had been bombings in some of the large cities, and then came the sickness. Initially, officials had called it a contamination. I didn’t know what officials called it now, if there were any officials left to call it anything. Dennis and I just called it the darkness. Every night we ran from it. And every night, the darkness got a little closer. Tonight, I would run alone.

  I continued down the ramp at a brisk walk. When I reached the Interstate, I slowed to a stroll. The eight-lane highway gave me a good 360 degree view. They wouldn’t be able to sneak up on me here, especially if I kept moving. And it’s not like they were quiet. I would run when the time came for it. But until then, I’d try to take it easy on my ankle.

  The chill of night slowly settled in around me. I zipped up my thin jacket. A full moon rose. I breathed a prayer of thanks. Any light at all brought a measure of security. The more light, the better I could see. And I had to be able to see them before they saw me. Before they got too close.