Deep Redemption
Cowboy smiled a cold smile at Viking. “Say what you want, brother, but you ain’t gonna be putting a blade through Flame or AK’s head anytime soon. You’d fuckin’ die for them first.”
Viking stuck his finger up at Cowboy; Cowboy tipped the edge of his Stetson in response. The Cajun was dead right.
I looked at Bull, and signed, “Get the prospects to clean this place up.”
I stormed toward the door, but before I got there, Viking said, “So what, Prez? We’re just gonna let him get away with all the shit he’s done?”
My back tensed as I heard the pissed-off tone in his voice. But I didn’t reply. I walked forward, but Vike spoke again. “You’re the fuckin’ Hangmen prez! You can’t be lettin’ your piece of pussy stop this kill! Tonight was a fuckin’ joke. You shoulda grabbed all y’all bitches by their hair and threw them outside! Pussy don’t interfere with Hangmen business. You just stood there like a dick and let them take him!”
Rage must have made me black out or some shit. Because the next thing I knew I had his huge fucking pale body up against the wall, my hand squeezing the air from his fucking throat. I could hear the brothers’ shouts from behind me, but I didn’t fucking care. All my attention was on this fuck. His eyes locked on mine as his face reddened. The anger searing through me forced words from my fucking defective mouth. “Y-You w-w-wanna be the f-f-fuckin’ p-prez? Y-You wanna t-t-take this sh-shit from m-my h-h-hands?” I slammed my free hand over the “Prez” patch on my cut. “Y-you w-want this? ‘Cause I-I’m sick of all th-this sh-shit!” My fingers piled more pressure onto his throat. Leaning closer, I said, “Y-You e-ever m-m-mention M-Mae again a-a-and I’ll k-k-kill y-y-you!” Viking’s eyes bulged. I dropped my arm and watched the fucker fall.
I whipped around to face my brothers with my arms spread wide. They were silently staring at me in shock. “An-anyone e-e-else wanna f-f-fuckin’ say s-s-somethin’?” I roared, my lips curling in fucking rage.
No fucker said a thing.
Dropping my arms, I fucking hightailed it into the rain, letting the water wash the blood from my skin.
I heard the sound of footsteps chasing me, and it was no surprise to me that it was Ky. My best friend joined me at my side. I turned to the thick wood of trees and began cutting through to my cabin.
“Fuck, Styx!” he said. “You just fuckin’ spoke! The brothers are just stood there like zombies, fuckin’ dumbstruck!” I kept pounding forward. My pulse was slamming in my neck. “SHIT!” he screamed and balled his hands into fists. “Our old men would be rollin’ in their fuckin’ graves at the shit that just happened! We can’t let our bitches do that again; the brothers were right. Hell, our old men would have slapped the fuck outta their women for pullin’ a move like that. That can’t happen. They need to keep their mouths shut.”
I didn’t respond; I just moved faster. “Styx,” Ky called as he followed me up the wet verge. “STYX!”
I spun around and shouted, “Wh-what the f-f-fuck do you ex-expect me t-to d-d-do?!”
The rain poured down my face and I yanked my hand through my hair. Knowing I couldn’t speak for shit right now, I signed, “You gonna kick the fuck outta Lilah for that shitshow? You think Flame is gonna lock Madds away and beat her for goin’ against him?” I tensed my jaw. “No, the fucker would kill any brother who even expected it of him. And don’t for a second think that I wouldn’t kill any prick in this club who wanted to punish Mae in my place.” A growl rattled in my chest. “I’d fuckin’ murder them, Ky. Any fucker tries to even speak to her about that fuckin’ interruption and I’ll fuckin’ rip out their tongues.”
I pointed at Ky. “And we both fuckin’ know you ain’t gonna do shit to Li. So you tell me, brother. What the fuck do we do now? ‘Cause Bella ain’t gonna let us get near that cunt. And Mae, Madds and Li ain’t gonna watch us tear Bella outta the fuckin’ way to get to him either.”
Ky sighed and leaned back against a tree. “It’s the rules, Styx. He needs to be killed. Ain’t no Hangmen rat ever been spared since the club was founded. We gonna be the first to let this shit go?” He huffed a humorless laugh. “We’ll be fuckin’ laughed at.”
“Fuck, I know!” I signed, managing to calm the fuck down. “Those brothers in there want blood. Our bitches want us to crush the kill.”
Ky shook his head. “We can’t. The debt needs to be paid.”
I moved to the tree opposite Ky and leaned against it. All I could fucking think of was what Bella had spewed about us forgiving Mae, Li and Madds. About how if it came down to it, if I would kill Ky. If he’d kill me.
“Would you do it?” Ky watched my hands. “If you had to kill me, could you do it?”
Ky looked away into the black woods. I didn’t think the brother would answer. Then he shook his head. “No. Not a fuckin’ chance.”
I closed my eyes and thought back to watching Rider as he choked his twin to death on the commune floor. The fucking look on his face as he watched him thrash beneath him . . . the hundreds of bodies surrounding him as he killed his fucking blood.
Jesus fuckin’ Christ.
“These bitches are makin’ seepin’ wet pussies outta us, you know that right?” Ky said, and I opened my eyes. Ky was smirking as he stared at me. My chest fucking lightened as I smirked back.
“We were stronger before,” Ky said, and this time he lost his smile. “Before the women. You and me were unbreakable. A fuckin’ ruthless unit. Now . . . ” He shrugged.
“You tellin’ me you wish you’d never met Li?” I signed.
Ky’s eyes moved to the direction of his cabin and that fucking smile was back. “No. Fuck, I should. After that shit they did tonight, I should . . . but I can’t. That fuckin’ bitch is my kryptonite.” He huffed. “She fuckin’ knows it too. And now I got Grace.” The brother shook his head. “Fuck, Styx. I just got what I thought we would never get. I ain’t gonna fuck up now. You saw the change in Li as much as I did. She’s happy, Prez. She’s fuckin’ happy.”
I thought of Mae in that damn sonogram room weeks ago, and I fucking knew what he meant. ‘Cause, Christ, she was fucking happy too. “I’m goin’ inside,” I signed and pushed myself off the tree.
“Yeah,” Ky said and turned toward his cabin.
Just as he was about to disappear from my sight, I said, “Ky!”
He walked back and tipped his head. “I-I’m r-r-really fuckin’ h-happy for y-you, brother. Gr-Grace. You deserve h-her.”
Ky’s lips curled into a smile and nodded his head. “You ain’t goin’ soft on me, are you, man? Like, you ain’t expectin’ me to fuckin’ man-hug you or some shit?”
I shook my head and gave him the finger.
Ky laughed and walked to his cabin.
When I pushed through my front door, the place was silent. I had to take deep breaths to stop myself going up to the clubhouse and tearing Mae away from Rider. If I went near him, I’d kill him.
I took a bottle of beer from the bar and kicked off my boots. I slumped onto the couch and took a swig of my drink. The house was too fucking quiet. I was used to hearing Mae laugh, or her soft voice singing some Dylan somewhere.
I reached for the remote and flicked on the TV. I froze; the first thing that greeted me was a helicopter view of the fucking commune. Cops were swarming all over the land, the dead bodies still scattered around. AK had called in the information to the cops as an anonymous tip. Looked like the fuckers finally found New Zion.
The ticker along the bottom of the news channel read “Mass Suicide at Austin-based Doomsday Cult.” Even from the distant camera angles, I could see the one fucker in a white tunic at the front of all the bodies.
Judah. Motherfucking Judah, who Rider killed with his fucking bare hands.
Fuck!
I tipped my head back, closing my eyes. I heard a gasp from the back of the room. I opened my eyes and saw Mae standing in the doorway, watching the scenes on the TV. She edged forward, taking in the mass of bodies. A close-up of Judah came on
screen, and Mae stilled. “Oh God . . . ” she whispered as she saw the shitshow that was her old life in technicolor. Her fucking wolf eyes shimmered with tears.
Shit. She looked exhausted. Her long hair was wet from the storm. Mae blinked. “That could have been us. This would have been us had we not gotten out.”
Mae seemed to snap herself out of her fuckin’ trance then looked at me. Her cheeks drained of color, but she schooled her fuckin’ features and straightened her spine. I almost smirked as she stood defiantly before me. Just like she had in that fuckin’ barn.
I gripped the bottle tighter in my hand. I had no fuckin’ idea what to say to her. I didn’t know whether to be pissed or proud. But one thing was for sure, she’d just brought a shit-ton of trouble to my door.
The brothers could turn on me over this shit.
Mae moved toward me. I tensed, wondering what the fuck was about to happen, when she shocked me all to hell by straddling my thighs.
I grunted as she sat herself the fuck down and pressed her forehead to mine. I closed my eyes and put my bottle on the side table so I could place my hands on her tiny waist.
Mae began kissing down my cheek and along my neck. I held her tighter as my cock began to harden. Her hands ran down my bare chest, and I lifted my fingers to her hair, fisting the strands tight so I could smash her mouth to mine.
Mae cried out as I sunk my tongue along next to hers and dragged her pussy along my hard cock in my leathers. She broke away, trying to breathe. I never let go of her though. She was staying right fucking here.
“Styx,” Mae said breathlessly, then edged back on my lap. Her wolf eyes met mine and I saw the plea in her face. “You cannot kill him. Please. For me. You cannot.”
I dropped my head back, trying to keep from turning Mae over and fucking her into next year. Her mouth moved back to my neck. I stared up at the ceiling. “Y-You f-fucked u-up.”
Mae broke from my neck. She brought herself higher so her face looked down on mine. “I know,” she said softly. “But . . . but I cannot regret it. I love my sister, Styx. She deserves to be as happy as Lilah and Maddie.” Mae ran her finger down my face. Her eyes filled with that fucking look she only wore when she looked at me, and it just about destroyed me. “She deserves to be as blissfully happy as I am with you.”
Mae took my hand from her waist and moved it over her stomach. “I saw how lost she was when she saw Maddie, Lilah and me, happy in our freedom. Then I saw how she was with Rider . . . and how he was with her.” My nose flared as she mentioned that dick.
“I know he has done wrong. But I also agree with Bella. Rider has done nothing but try to make amends for his role in this mess, ever since he realized it was all false. More than his role, his brother’s and uncle’s too. We need to let it be. I will not see Bella hurt by my husband’s hand. I . . . ” Tears built in her eyes. “I could not cope with being the reason for her pain. She has suffered enough. Rider has suffered enough. Just . . . stop.”
“M-Mae,” I groaned and shook my head. “I-I c-can’t.”
“You can,” she said. “It is quite simple really. You just forgive him and move on.”
I raised my eyebrow and almost fucking cracked when she laughed at my silence. She was so fucking beautiful, the most stunning bitch there ever was. As if she’d read my mind, she kissed my lips and said, “I love you too.”
She sobered up. “Styx?” I flicked my chin. Mae sighed. “I am done with all the blood and pain. A miracle was awarded to us when Bella came home. The commune is done. There is no more hurt. So forgive Rider. He is Bella’s husband. She loves him . . . just let it go. Allow them to live in the happiness they have found.”
When I didn’t say shit in response, Mae asked, “Will you consider it? For me, please?”
To answer her question, I rolled her over until her back was flat against the couch. Mae cried out in surprise, but then her wolf eyes grew heavy and her hands ran through my hair. Reaching down, I pulled my cock from my leathers and hitched up her dress.
I didn’t wanna think about Rider. I wanted to forget about tonight, period. Right now I just wanted to sink my cock in Mae’s wet pussy and make my bitch scream.
So I did. Over and over a-fucking-gain
*****
Two days later . . .
I entered church last, dropping to my seat at the head of the table. I hadn’t seen my brothers in two days. I’d had a fucking lot of thinking to do.
Each of my brothers was staring at me. When my eyes fell on Vike, his face was blank.
For once, my fucking heart pounded. For once I felt real fucking fear at what I was about to say. But, fuck, it was what was gonna happen. I’d take the fallout, whatever the fuck it might be.
I lifted my hands. “Rider ain’t gonna die.” As Ky said the words aloud, I felt the tension rise in the room. “Y’all can think what the fuck you want of me, I don’t give two shits, but he’s with Bella now, and that bitch is family. I ain’t gonna fuck with my family.” I took a breath. “I got things the turncoat rat needs to stick to, or I will take him out. But he ain’t gonna die today.” Moving forward in my seat, I shucked off my cut and slammed it on the table. I met each of my brothers’ faces and signed, “You want me to step down as prez, just say the fuckin’ word. This is my club, my fuckin’ life. But I ain’t gonna move on this decision. Just say the word and I’ll hand the reins to Ky.” I took my knife from my pocket and held it over my ‘Prez’ patch.
I saw Ky shaking his head. But this wasn’t his call. If the brothers had lost faith in me, they needed to open their fucking mouths and say so.
“Fuck no,” someone suddenly said. Flame was sitting forward, glaring at my knife. “I ain’t killin’ him either. I ain’t hurtin’ Maddie. You’re the fuckin’ prez. You’re stayin’ the fuckin’ prez.”
I nodded at Flame. AK leaned back in his seat. “You ain’t goin’ nowhere, Styx. Fuck the rat. I ain’t even gonna think of him no more. There’ll be plenty more cunts like him comin’ our way. I’ll just save my rage for them.”
More heads nodded. “You’re the fuckin’ prez, Styx,” Tank said. “Ain’t gonna lose you because of this shit. That fucker ain’t worth it. You’ve led us this far. You ain’t gonna jeopardize the club. I’m with ya.”
Bull and Tanner nodded in agreement.
“I don’t even know the prick,” Cowboy drawled. “Ain’t no skin off my nose. But yeah, you keep that patch on that cut. We only came here from bein’ nomads because of you. You’re not fuckin’ steppin’ down now over some psycho prophet.” Hush flicked his chin at me in agreement.
Smiler, more mute than me, sat at the back. He tipped his head toward me. He was never gonna disagree with my call.
I met Viking’s eyes. “That fucker needs to die. But no fucker wants to lose you as prez.” The redhead shrugged. “As long as I don’t gotta see his face again, do what the fuck you want. But you and that gavel ain’t goin’ nowhere.” He smiled. “And I like pissin’ you off too much to see you step down.”
“And you know I’ve got your back,” Ky added. I dropped the knife. Ky turned to the brothers. “All in agreement that the fucker is left alone?”
A chorus of “Ayes,” came sailing my way. Viking slammed his hands on the table. “Now get that cut back on, Styx and stop bein’ so fuckin’ melodramatic. Shit! Between you, your bitches and Cowboy forever bein’ all open with his hippie feelins, I’m gonna grow a fuckin’ vagina! And that’d be a shame because my dick is a fuckin’ modern marvel. The anaconda is too precious to lose.”
AK rolled his eyes.
Cowboy flipped Vike the finger.
And just like that, my brothers were back at my side.
I put away my knife, threw on my cut, and slammed the gavel down to the table.
Church done.
I pounded out of the door and down the hallway. I slammed open Smiler’s door. A shocked gasp met my entrance. Bella and Rider were lying in bed—the prick was in a bad fucking way. Be
lla hadn’t left his side since the barn. Mae told me Bella didn’t ever leave in case we took that opportunity to get at her man. Even now Bella jumped off the bed and prepared herself to fight. I didn’t know what the fuck she was thinking, acting like she could take me. But she impressed me. Bella was one fucking feisty bitch.
I could see why Mae liked her so fucking much.
“What do you want?” Bella asked coldly. I ignored her and moved to the bed.
Rider’s face was a bruised, battered mess. He had bandages everywhere and one of his eyes was still sealed shut. The other one wasn’t much better, but he could see me. And I could fucking see his apprehension as I stood there.
I lifted my hands and signed, “Need to talk to him.”
Bella frowned. “I do not understand you.”
My nostrils flared with frustration. Rider opened his swollen, cracked lips, and managed to rasp out, “He . . . he needs to . . . talk to me.”
“Then talk,” Bella said, folding her arms.
“Alone.” I signed, quickly losing patience with her attitude.
Rider told her what I’d said. “No,” she said. I saw the panic in her face. My teeth clenched.
“Bella?” Mae’s voice came from the doorway. Bella looked at my bitch. “He will not hurt him. You have my word.” Bella stared at me, trying to read my face or some shit. I stared right the fuck back. “Bella, please. Leave them alone,” Mae begged.
Bella’s shoulders slumped. Moving to Rider, she kissed him on his forehead, then walked past me. The bitch eyeballed me the entire way. I decided right then that if she’d have been a guy, I’d have recruited her to my club on the spot.
When the door shut behind her, I walked to the chair by the bed and sat down. Rider watched me the whole way. My attention fell to the cross-shaped scar on his chest. I felt fuck-all remorse.
“So this is what’s gonna happen.” Rider watched my hands like a hawk. “Since you’re married to Mae’s sister and it would kill my bitch if she left over your stupid ass, you ain’t gonna die.” I saw Rider’s chest lift up and down as he breathed hard. I leaned forward. “But that’s where the fuckin’ charity ends. Mae will only be happy if Bella is close. But Bella bein’ close means your rat-ass bein’ close.” I shrugged. “Then again, it means we can track your every move. And we will. Everywhere you go will be monitored. You won’t take a shit without one of us knowing about it. And if you ever try and do anythin’ to fuck with the club, there’ll be no more second chances.” Rider looked like he wanted to speak, but I didn’t wanna hear his fucking excuses. I shook my head, warning him not to even try and talk. He didn’t.