Drunk Dial

  “Oh, my God. What did you do?”

  “I decided to bite the bullet. I’m gonna turn this into another food truck. I have an appointment with the university next week to talk about getting a permanent spot for it on campus.”

  “I can’t believe I never thought of that. That’s seriously an awesome location for it.”

  “I hope it works out. It’s gonna take some time to fix it up and to get it exactly the way I need it inside, but I won’t know if I don’t try, right? I have to spend some time figuring out how to brand it. I sold the Landon’s Lunch Box name and the app. So, it’s going to really be like starting from scratch, but my hope is to build something as good, if not better, than the old one.”

  Landon spent some time showing me around the new truck before we returned upstairs to the apartment.

  “Once it’s up and running,” I said, “I can help you during the day, since I only have to work in the evenings.”

  “I was counting on you as my sidekick a few days a week. That would be awesome.”

  The thought of getting to work alongside him was seriously making me giddy. I remembered how much fun it was in California.

  “Someone is going to have to help fend all those college girls off of my hot, tatted boyfriend. I’m going to be spewing venom.”

  “One look at my girlfriend with the snake around her shoulders…I’m pretty sure they’ll all run away.” He wrapped his arm around my neck and kissed my forehead. “Actually, I was thinking that my belly dancing princess would probably be a huge draw for the college guys. I’m gonna need to make it crystal clear that you belong to me. Just the thought of some kid flirting with you in front of me makes me crazy. I might lose my shit and my business right then and there.”

  I smiled at my crazy-hot boyfriend. Some days, I couldn’t believe he was actually mine now. I think a part of me would always feel jealous, insecure, and especially protective when it came to him.

  Feeling like I needed to relax, I grabbed a bottle of wine. “Let’s celebrate.” When I opened the drawer, I took notice of the butt plug that had been sitting there since the day my father walked in on us. “Remember this?”

  “I do.” His voice lowered. “I wouldn’t mind playing around with that right now, actually.”

  “I think I’m going to need a lot more than a glass of wine, then.”

  He examined my face. “You think it’s something you need to be drunk for?”

  “Honestly, it scares me a little…anal.”

  “Really…what are you scared of?”

  “I’ve never had anything…you know…in there before.”

  “I know I’ve spoken about how much I want to do it with you, and part of the reason I get excited about it is because I know I’d be your first. I selfishly want to claim every inch of you. But we have a lot of time. I don’t ever want you to feel pressured. I didn’t realize it scared you. You need to tell me stuff like that. Now, I feel like an ass—pun intended.”

  “I do want to try it. I’m just afraid it will hurt. You’re not a small man.”

  “You think I’m just going to stick it in? There’s an art to anal. And if it doesn’t feel so fucking amazing that you’re screaming in pleasure, it’s not being done right. It shouldn’t feel painful.”

  I almost asked him how he got to be so experienced, but I bit my words. I didn’t even want to think about him doing something so intimate with anyone else. I’d gotten pretty good at not letting my mind go there anymore, and I didn’t want to regress.

  Landon’s face was in mine. “You will know when you’re ready. And you sure as hell aren’t gonna need to be drunk with me. If a person needs to be drunk for it, then their partner isn’t doing it right. There is a big difference between pressure and pain. It should never be painful. But the pressure should be pleasurable. But before we even get to that part, I’d tease you until you couldn’t take it anymore. There’s no way my dick would be in your ass unless you were begging me to put it there.”

  Hearing those words come out of his mouth just flipped a switch inside of me. I couldn’t recall ever feeling hornier in my life. The muscles between my legs contracted. “Well, I’m intrigued.”

  He gritted his teeth. “And I’m hard as fuck.”

  “I want to try it.”

  I didn’t have to say it twice.

  His eyes lit up. “If you don’t like it, we’ll just stop.”

  He took the butt plug from me, and I followed as he led me to our bedroom.

  Landon slowly undressed me until I was completely naked.

  Covered in goosebumps, I lay back on the bed and closed my eyes as he planted soft kisses down the length of my body. He just kept doing it until he could sense that I was completely relaxed.

  Kneeling over me, he unbuckled and lowered his jeans, letting them hang halfway down his legs. I could see the wetness seeping through his underwear.

  “I’m a little too excited,” he rasped.

  I took my foot and rubbed it along his erection, which was covered by the material of his boxer briefs.

  Landon reached over to grab the butt plug from the end table. He also took out a tube of something and squirted it over the tip. Apparently, he’d kept it readily available for this moment.

  Spreading my legs open, he looked at me and said, “Relax your muscles. This is gonna feel a little cold at first.”

  Landon began to slowly insert the toy into my ass. It felt strange at first, but he was going as easy on me as possible, pushing it in a little at a time then pulling it out again. The sensation when he’d take it out slowly felt odd but not in any way uncomfortable. As my muscles expanded slowly, the feeling of the butt plug moving in and out became more pleasurable.

  “I wish you could see this, Rana, how beautiful your ass is opening and closing like this. Fucking incredible. I’ve never seen you like this.”

  “It feels really good.”

  “I’m gonna keep it in you for a while. It will help stretch you for me.”

  Landon’s cock had to be quadruple the thickness of the plug. I tried not to freak out at the thought, but I felt a lot better about it now than before.

  While the plug was fully inside, he lowered his mouth to my clit, lapping me with his tongue. The sensation of his mouth on my pussy along with the pressure of the toy in my ass was extremely arousing.

  He’d almost made me come several times but always seemed to know when to stop before I climaxed.

  I felt him reach down and slowly pull the butt plug from my ass. Despite the odd sensation, I longed to be filled again. I craved him. He was right. There would be a point where I would beg him to enter me. So desperate, I didn’t care anymore about the potential of pain. I just wanted him inside of me.

  “How do you feel? You want me to put it back in?”

  “I want you there.”

  “You want me where?”

  “Are you gonna make me say it?”

  “Fuck, yes.”

  “I want you in my ass.”

  With a smug grin, he lowered his boxers. The sight of his engorged cock springing forward momentarily gave me pause.

  Did I just ask him to put that thing inside of my butt?

  He lowered his mouth again, but this time, I felt the heat of his tongue rimming my ass slowly. Closing my eyes, I enjoyed the slow circles of heat, the feel of his hot breath blowing into my hole. He stuck his tongue all the way inside and groaned. It felt fucking phenomenal.

  He stopped then said, “Breathe, don’t tense up. I’m gonna use my fingers for a while first.”

  Instinctively, I did exactly as he told me not to do. I tensed up.

  Realizing it, I said, “I’m sorry.”

  “For what? It’s okay.”

  He stopped to kiss me before squirting some lube onto his fingers. He then eased them inside of me, moving in and out slowly just as he had with the plug.

  When I’d totally entered a zone, he pulled his fingers out and gave me fair warning.

>   “I need to fuck your ass now.”

  I looked up to find him gazing down at me as he jerked his cock.

  “I’m going to take this even slower than before,” he said. “If at any point, I’m hurting you, just tell me to stop.”

  I nodded eagerly. It surprised me how much I desperately wanted this, how little I cared if it hurt anymore.

  Squeezing a copious amount of lube on his dick, he rubbed it all over his shaft before lowering himself down onto me.

  His lips moved over mine slowly as I felt his crown at my entrance. He inched in ever so slowly then moved out of me just as he’d done with the sex toy.

  There was no comparison though. Feeling his warm flesh entering me was infinitely more arousing, not only because having him in my asshole felt entirely different but because of his own stimulation.

  Landon’s eyes were shut tight as he continued to fuck my ass ever so slowly, the tip moving gently in and out. Each time he would reenter me, he would go just a tad deeper until eventually, he was all the way inside. All of my nerve endings were activated. Now that he was fully inside, the pressure seemed to ease up a bit.

  “This is unreal, Rana. So tight.” He eased his movement for a moment. “Still feel okay?”

  “Yes.”

  I didn’t know whether it was the taboo aspect of what we were doing or what, but it just felt so much more intense than anything Landon and I had ever done before. Despite his size, he had used so much lube that it didn’t hurt. Like he’d promised, there was pressure but no pain. I realized that he was probably the only man in the world I could have experienced this with, because he was the only person I trusted implicitly. It was a very vulnerable situation to be in, but as I was finding, with the right person it could be amazing.

  “You feel so incredible. Please, tell me this feels good for you.”

  “Crazy good. You can go faster.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes.”

  Landon fucked my ass harder but quickly lost it. “Oh, fuck…shit.”

  Now I knew why he’d been going so slowly. Apparently, he couldn’t take it. His body shook in concession. Feeling him throbbing inside of me just put me over the edge. Almost as soon as his warm load filled my ass, I rubbed my clit to orgasm. He’d come so hard, and I could feel his semen dripping down my thighs.

  He was still panting when he asked, “Are you surprised that you liked it so much?”

  “No. Not with you.” I grinned. “What does it feel like for you?”

  “It’s tighter—hard to describe. I love sex both ways equally, to be honest. This was your first time and because you were just so tight, it felt almost too good—obviously, you saw how fast I came.” He kissed me. “Thank you for trusting me.”

  “Thank you for making it easy.”

  BATHTUB THERAPY

  Landon made me put my hands over my face. “Close your eyes. Keep them closed.”

  “What is going on?”

  Leading me blindly outside, he reiterated, “Don’t open them yet.”

  “This is crazy,” I said, trying not to trip.

  When we finally stopped, I heard him say, “Okay, open them.”

  I opened my eyes and gasped.

  Landon’s new truck was parked outside. He’d taken it to get detailed, so it had been gone for a couple of weeks. He wouldn’t tell me what he was doing to it. Now, I knew why.

  My mouth was agape. “It’s…” I couldn’t even gather my thoughts enough to speak.

  “Amazing, right?”

  I tilted my head to look at her from a different angle. I say her because plastered on the front of the truck was a giant decal of…me along with the name Rana’s Banana. It wasn’t a photo of me, but rather a cartoon caricature. She had my big eyes, long, black hair, and was dressed in a belly dancer outfit. She was buxom and even had a snake around her neck with her hands holding it at both ends. The snake’s tongue was sticking out like it was slithering. And I was sitting on a giant banana.

  “I can’t believe you did this.”

  “Why not? You’re my muse. From the moment you came into my life, that’s how I’ve felt.”

  “That’s very sweet, baby. I just…this is…” I had no words.

  His enthusiasm was really cute. “I couldn’t imagine walking by this truck and not stopping. And when people come for lunch, they can meet the real Rana if you happen to be working with me that day. That will be quite a draw.”

  I didn’t have the heart to tell him that the idea of being on public display didn’t appeal to me at all. But this was clearly a done deal. He must have paid a fortune to have this designed. And it was sweet that he wanted to dedicate his business to me.

  There was only one response. “I love you. Thank you for this gesture.”

  The excitement in his eyes was palpable. “Thank you for inspiring me, beautiful.”

  It was the grand opening of the truck, and the weather was unusually warm for spring in Michigan.

  Landon had parked Rana’s Banana right outside of the campus green. He’d been given a license to operate at that location for a year.

  Students flocked to the unusual food truck, curious about its contents based on the sultry caricature of me. I had to admit, Landon’s edgy marketing idea was pretty clever. The bustling crowd of hungry students proved that he’d sparked their curiosity with the sexy image. And it seemed he’d also tapped into something that was missing, because there were no other food trucks in the vicinity.

  Perhaps, even more special than the decal of me was his other idea. On the opposite side of the truck, he’d attached a giant dry erase board. At the top was written: Tell Me Something Funny. It was a tribute to the question he’d always ask me when he was feeling down.

  The students really got a kick out of it and took turns borrowing the marker.

  Within an hour, the board was full of funny sentences. There were a wide variety of jokes, some humorous, some dumb, and some bizarre. Things like:

  I sharted in class today.

  or

  My roommate ended up with breast implants after getting drunk and losing a bet in Thailand. He’s currently raising money to get them removed.

  The idea was ingenious because the students would stop to write something then smell the amazing food and decide to order.

  Landon had five specialty sandwiches on the menu, and I worked hard to memorize the ingredients of each.

  The best part of the first day was when the lunch crowd died down, and Lilith came by in the late afternoon. Her nanny had picked her up after school and brought her down to check out the truck.

  Landon leaned out of the window. “What can I get for you, Sassypants?”

  “That is seriously the scariest picture of Rana I have ever seen.”

  “You don’t like it?” He laughed.

  “No, I meant scary close to how she looks.”

  “Oh, good. I agree.”

  “Can I see the inside?”

  “Of course, you can,” I said.

  The nanny stayed back reading a book on the grass while we entertained Lilith inside the truck for a bit.

  Landon’s mood always seemed to brighten when Lilith was around. I think she reminded him of being a kid, an innocent time in our lives, especially given that she looked like my younger self.

  “What can I make for you, Miss?”

  “I’ll take a Fickle Pickle, but I want to help make it.”

  “Okay. Rana’s gonna grab us the ingredients, and I’ll let you make it yourself.”

  I stood back with my arms crossed, watching as Landon guided her through the process.

  “I don’t know, Landon. I think Lilith might be vying for my position as your assistant.”

  He looked over at me and winked. Watching Landon with her gave me a serious warm and fuzzy feeling. I knew he would make an amazing father someday, that is, if he wanted kids; we’d never discussed it. Up until very recently, I was pretty sure I would never have another child
.

  One thing I knew for certain was that Landon would always look out for Lilith. She didn’t realize it, but the handsome goofball helping her make that sandwich was someone who would always have her back, just like he had mine.

  During a visit with Lilith a few weeks later, I was completely blindsided.

  I probably never realized how much I needed Landon until that afternoon when I literally ran from Lilith’s house to the university.

  Landon was closing the truck down for the afternoon when I’d arrived on campus.

  He immediately recognized that something was off. “What’s wrong, Rana?” Dropping everything, he ran out of the vehicle and held me. “You’re shaking. Did someone try to hurt you?”

  “No, I’m fine.”

  “What happened?”

  “I was with Lilith and…” I sucked in some air.

  “What?”

  “She started talking to me about how she often wonders where she came from.”

  He took me in his arms. “Oh, baby. I’m sorry.”

  “I knew this day would come, but I still wasn’t prepared for it.”

  “I know you weren’t.”

  “I’m realizing now that I can’t do this. I can’t pretend to not know anything and lie to her face. I’ve gotten really lucky up until now, but I just don’t know how to fake it. It just seems cruel.”

  “How did you handle it?”

  “I barely did. I feel like she could tell something was wrong with me. I listened to her, nodded a lot. It was awful. I pride myself on being open and honest with her. But this is the one thing I can’t talk about, not until they give me permission.”

  My breathing was becoming choppy really fast. Landon knew I was prone to panic attacks. He continued to hold me tightly until I calmed down.

  “Hop in the truck. Let’s go home. We need to talk about some stuff, and it can’t wait.”

  “I can’t handle anything more today, Landon.”

  “It’s not anything bad—at all. I promise. It’s just a long overdue conversation, and it relates to what happened today.”

  He finished the last of his cleaning up as I sat there in a daze.