UZZLES
By Abbott Walking Carbonic
Copyright 2016 Abbott Walking Carbonic
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Life, itself is a puzzle, but that’s not what puzzles us most. The four stories present to how life puzzles have been solved by humans and Gods. Enjoy!
THE LOVE PUZZLE
I am a fun of science fiction, however, this very time, I am saturated with non-fiction. Many times I have been held in queue of quandary by funny things that keep on bumping in the paths of Mathematicians.
As the disciple of the Truth, I may define a mathematician a being who stands the chance of interminably solving mind cracking puzzles that the Universe tends to bring forth. Heck! I hate my brain, for it has got a dangerous photographic memory: it keeps on flashing back quanta of the whimsical life of my fellow Mathematician. Of course, I will spare you and tell you only a small moiety of his social strains.
As the Mathematician pushed some of the books he had been using to give the Vortex Mathematics lectures from Arua Community College, into the shelves, the memories of the previous meetings brought him some dithers. Again he was to meet his girlfriend this evening. In the last meeting, his girlfriend had called him “Sweet Honey!” , a thing that blew all his wits that he had mattered: “eh madam, I 'tink it's a misnomer! I'm human, no, not your ex-animate honey!” The girlfriend had smiled heart-burningly and meltingly said; “dear, it's just a word used by lovers to mean their love...” Then he was left iteratively saying: “oh sorry, I'm sorry...”
“I wonder what a new thing she's going say …' growled the Mathematician and further pushed the books and then rose to dress up, well to meet the lady he now knew as his princess.
As soon as, the Mathematician stepped in the pub, he beheld a lady rising up, smiling, and exposing the milky teeth. She had smooth rather less cosmetic face. Her dark hair running in two bunches terminating into sweet tassels. On the brown laces of her dainty shoes smartly gurgled the mellifluous robe. “It's Comfort!” murmured the Mathematician.
The lady nimbly moved and kissed the Mathematician and led him to the table without a word and the two sat in silence.
The silence was broken by the Mathematician; “I'm sorry comfort, I'm no, not of your type”, said the Mathematician.
“Frank, that's not true,” said his girlfriend smilingly, “now what is the difference between you and me?”
The Mathematician looked puzzled. Then a faint smile wet his lips. At last he said; “It's me!”
“What are you?” His girlfriend wanted to know.
“Comfort , it's your love puzzle, you asked,” slowly started the Mathematician, “the difference between me and you…, so assuming I'm eks and you are wi, then if you get the difference – I mean if you take away wi, that's, you, we'll remain with eks that's, I. I promise you Comfort that won't happen, I won't be left alone here, and...”
“Okay, okay okay!!!” His girlfriend sanguinely cried, “I didn't mean anything akin to that.”
THE END OF THE LOVE PUZZLEBy Abbott Walking Carbonic
THE SOUL CAPACITOR
“What is it that you want to show us?’’ the very lady wanted to know.
‘’ Holy bananas, I guess, it looks like time traveler exhibition,” chuckled the young man.
“You will have to hold me bit by bit!” said Andia, “I will not tell anything before seep of coffee”
“Well, I will do that and we have our time-travelling machine exhibition, not so?” thrilled the Young man.
The Doctor bent over to his lap without any utterance apart from the recurrent clearing of the throat. The very lady flexed her face to her phone and the Young man getting the tea ready. For the case of Andia, he bent over to one side with his head supported by the left arm and you could see him lost in thought.
“So you thought I had lost brain when I dropped out of school?” asked Andia, looking in Doctor’s direction after he was done with his coffee. This question made the rest of the party to turn their attention to him. Apart from the Young man who kept his eyes on Andia, the two had been absorbed in other things: the very lady in her phone and the doctor in the ground that lay in front of him.
“Everyone thought of it that way!’ answered the Doctor
“So what laser gun have you invented?” the very lady wanted to know.
“Am sure it’s something akin to time travelling and I am ready to be the first Time-traveler, you may send me first sir” bubbled the Young man
“Well, that’s no significance!” exclaimed Andia, “the matter’s what I have called you for”
“But what is it?” The very lady wanted to know.
“Still, you will have to hold me bit by bit” said Andia
”As expected!” affirmed the Young man.
“Now, late during my high school days, you will realize that I was much drawn to the works on the nature of the human soul despite much criticism of theories…”started Andia.
“So you mean you have been trying to prove the Orchestrated Objective Reduction?” the very lady wanted to know.
“You will have to do the listening first…” said Andia
“As expected!” Affirmed the Young man
“One day during my high school class I figured it out that human soul was part of the universe though it has a weaker interaction with our consciousness that we could deem it in-existent
“But I prefer showing you what I have done than haranguing to you. You may follow me to the next room,” said Andia. From his pocket he drew a blue angular disc, something that bore some resemblance to the remote controls of radio televisions of two decades earlier; though, still the control buttons were touch pads. He pressed on the disc and the wall behind the very lady disappeared.
“Holy bananas, how on Earth did you make that?” thrilled the Young man.
“This is one of the upshots of what I dug out in the quest of Human soul; it’s a side effect of the main task. That wall you were seeing has just been shifted in space time dimension. I can bring it again and also make it disappear. Literally I can make any matter disappear at a wish by shifting its space and time dimension! I stumbled on this strange possibility when I was trying to understand why human soul disappears in upper dimensions.”
“Did you concoct all of it all?” The very lady wanted to know.
“Why not, I had every time I needed to do whatever”
“And the finance?” the very still wanted to know.
“Have you forgotten his mother’s mining company in Paider?” the Doctor reminded the very lady.
“Let’s try to hold onto to what called you here,” said Andia and led the way to the room and the rest of the party followed him, the Young man keeping closer to him.
The room was almost a hall. To the right stood a big work table with a higgledy-piggledy paper works on top, behind was a swivel chair. Behind the chair stood a long cupboard filled with books. The very lady picked interest in exploring them and at once she was at the shelves flipping papers.
The Young man ran to sit on the chair. ‘’t’s fifty cent comfit to sit on” He shouted. Andia pressed his blue disc, there the young man crumbled to the ground – the chair had disappeared in other dimensions.
This made even the Doctor to laugh!
“This is the funniest moment that I have ever beheld!” he exclaimed.
“Hope now you understand it all, why those days when you found this room open nothing used to be seen in here!” said Andia as he looked in Doctor’s direction, “I just prefer storing my properties in upper dimensions so that they remain safe as I found out that the fifth dimension has no beings that would tamper with my storage.”
The very lady simply simpered. ‘‘I can see you’ve kept all the hell of computing for the two decades,” she said.
“That’s not important!” said Andia.
“As expected!” affirmed the Young man. Then he pointed to the left where stood three machines wrapped in a transparent cover, “Isn’t that a Time-traveler?”
This question was no answered. Andia simply moved towards the machines, the young man keeping very close to him. The Doctor slowly followed the two and the very lady left behind opening one book to another, books that were now rare to find in 2040. One of the machines that looked like a chocolate machine in the factories stood close to the wall, cables running from it to a video output system and others to what Andia said to be the audio out-put unit.
“This is a soul capacitor, “Andia unwrapped the machine. The very lady dropped the book she was reading and hurried to his colleagues.
“Holy eyes, you mean it stores soul?” The young man exclaimed.
“Well said,” answered