Shreiber and Tome: Unlucky Vamps

  8. Science Makes My Head Hurt.

  The sun was only just rising when Lil awoke, stiff and tired, but unable to fall back to sleep. As she washed her face in the bathroom sink, she caught sight of her reflection in the mirror. It was a horror show. She had a black eye, and most alarmingly, several long bruises on her neck shaped like fingers. She showered and changed, picking out a shirt with a high collar to hide the bruises. Then she made her way to the office.

  It was just before seven when she arrived. To her surprise, Amy was already there, sitting at her desk, and she could see Tome moving behind the frosted glass window of the office door.

  “Wow,” said Amy. “You look like crap.”

  “Coming from you, I take that as a compliment.”

  “Ho ho. Oh, there was a message for you. Some guy called, said he’d drop by sometime this morning.”

  “What guy?”

  Amy shrugged. “A guy.”

  “Well what did he want? A case? To kill Mike?”

  Amy shrugged again, and went back to reading the screenplay open on her desk. Lil shook her head and went to her office.

  She found Tome sitting on her desk, talking on the phone. He had changed his clothes as well. He was almost neat in a crisp white shirt, and black pants with a matching black vest. He also wore a purple tie covered with yellow runes, and his grubby coat was draped over the back of his chair.

  He looked up as she entered. “Hang on,” he said in the phone. “She’s here, I’ll put you on the speaker.” He fumbled with the phone controls before finally getting it right. “Okay. Still there, Frankenstein?”

  “Still here, my wizardly friend,” came a familiar voice over the tiny speakers. It was Poe, the coroner at Sub-Human Control. “Lilijana?”

  “I'm here, Poe. How you doing?”

  “Not bad, all things considered. Young Hugh is keeping me occupied. Never a moments peace these days. Vampires dropping left, right and centre. Body parts everywhere. It’s bliss.”

  “You are a deeply disturbing man sometimes, Poe.”

  “Thank you. I like to think I have the heart of twelve year old boy. It should still be in my desk. I can show it to you if you like.”

  “Pass,” said Tome quickly.

  “So did you call for a reason, or are the patients giving you attitude again?” Lil asked.

  “Sadly no, they are all uncommunicative. It’s sad. If only people talked more. Anyway, I did find something that will be of interest to you. You are still working the case, aren’t you?”

  “Definitely,” Lil said without hesitation.

  “Well then. I spent last night doing the autopsy for your unfortunate friend from the hotel. When something absolutely, astoundingly obvious occurred to me. We were looking for a connection between the victims...”

  “They knew Sabrina Jeunet,” put in Tome. “Except for Olson...”

  “Yes. Tell me, how much do you know about vampiric transformation?”

  “What’s to know? They bite you, you get an overwhelming urge to wear black and act like a prat.”

  “Succinct, but to the point,” said Poe. “However, the actual process is rather more complicated. Many researchers have only just begun to break the surface in understanding the many biological and biochemical changes that take place. It’s a very fascinating field.”

  “Sure,” said Tome. “You can find the gene that makes them such unlikable twats.”

  “Funny you should say that,” replied Poe. “Have you ever heard of a Haemophagic Long Chain Molecule?”

  “Sixties rock band?” suggested Lil. “Or were they the Haemorrhagic Legion of Crazy Mothers?”

  “That wasn’t until the eighties,” corrected Tome. “They had that song, Don’t Bleed On Me.”

  “A classic,” said Poe. “But no. A Haemophagic Long Chain Molecule is a type of lipoprotein found in vampires, primarily bound in the cellular membranes of red blood cells.”

  “I was just about to say that,” said Tome, who could barely pronounce lipoprotein.

  “It is the source of much interest in the field of bio-necrology. So far we have very little idea the LCM’s exact function. It seems to play a role in the vampirisation of body tissues. It’s one of the first signs of vampirism in an infected subject. We’re trying to get an over-the-counter blood test manufactured. Although,” Poe said with a chuckle, “it’s proving quite hard. Antibody therapy doesn’t work because a vampire’s haemocytes simply assimilate anything they touch...”

  “I’m understanding about one in three words here,” Tome said to Lil.

  “I’ll explain later,” she whispered.

  “Anyway,” Poe continued. They could tell he was getting excited explaining this to them. “A recent study undertaken at the Chapter City University, in part by yours truly, has uncovered another interesting facet of the HLCMs. After much examination, we've discovered that the sequence of these molecules are unique to certain vampire blood lines. All vampire’s that have evolved from a certain progenitor have the same HLCM sequence as one another.”

  Tome looked blank. “Could you repeat that part?”

  “What part?”

  “Well, you were doing good until just after “Good morning”. After that, things started getting fuzzy.”

  “No, I think I get it,” said Lil. She looked amazed. “Are you trying to say that all vampires that carry the bloodline of a certain vamp, have the same molecular sequence. That you can actually track the lineage of vampires.”

  “In short, yes.” She imagined the little coroner beaming proudly. “I spent all night testing the blood, running it through all the usual methods. Restriction fragment length PCR seems to work quite well...”

  “You know,” commented Tome. “The difference between the dark arts and science, is that at least with magic, we know we’re talking gibberish.”

  “What did you find?” asked Lil. “All of our victims have the same sequence?”

  “Not all. Just the ones whose names were found underneath one of those pretty circles the erudite Master Tome found at the crime scenes.”

  “Wait, even Jack Olson, the second victim?”

  “Even he.”

  “And Sabrina?”

  “The girl from last night. Yes, her as well.”

  “But she said she didn’t even know him,” said Tome. “Didn’t recognise him from the news...”

  “Well, either she was lying, and did vamp him,” said Lil thoughtfully. “Or, whoever made her a vampire, vamped him as well. So they would have the same sequence.” She paused, and looked at Tome.

  He reached the same conclusion. “Bill,” they said together.

  “Pardon?” asked Poe.

  “Nothing. Did you tell Hugh about this?”

  “Of course. I’m sure he grasped its relevance, but not nearly as quickly.”

  “You could get into trouble for telling us,” said Lil.

  “I realise that,” Poe said truthfully. “However, as clever as I am sure young Hugh is, in matters such as this I find you, my dear Lilijana, to be much more understanding. Good luck. And be careful now.”

  “I will. Thanks, Poe.”

  He hung up. Lil looked up at Tome and grinned. “Well, why don’t we pay Killed Bill a visit?”

  Tome looked serious, which took her by surprise. It wasn’t an expression she saw often. Even less often than she saw him pay for something with actual cash. She decided to be worried.

  “About that,” started Tome. “I think I’ll go talk to Bill alone.”

  “What?”

  “I’m going to finish this myself. You go home and get some rest.”

  Lil waited for the punch line, but not for long. “You just want the money all for yourself,” she joked, not being amused.

  “Well, as nice as all that moolah would be, I wouldn’t dream of ripping you off.”

  “Yeah right.

  “Well, not so obviously. I just think that maybe you should skip this one.”

  Lil no
ticed him looking at the neck of her shirt. She sighed in irritation. “Look,” she snapped. “If you’re going to get all sensitive on me-”

  “Oh, please. I don’t do sensitive this early in the morning. This whole thing is getting seriously screwed up on a whole new level. I don’t want to be the one to get you hurt a second time-”

  “Second time? Ha! We’ve been in the teens for long while now, buddy.”

  “Alright, fine. Let’s overlook the blinding physical pain we are likely to be on the receiving end of again soon, and skip right to the finale. We’re dealing with an angel now. We know that, for certain. And he may be a complete drooling lunatic, but he’s still an angel. An Ascended Being, a being of purity. Whatever his reasons for being here, we are about to go against it. There are only a few ways this whole thing can end. The good one being us living and him not. That is some seriously bad karma, Lil. The guys upstairs might not look kindly on us, especially if the guy ends up in the hands of Von Drais.

  “Just hear me out,” he said quickly as Lil tried to speak. “Because I don’t think you’re fully grasping just how serious this is. We can die. Fine, we know life doesn’t end there, so to speak. Now, when I go, I know exactly where I’m ending up. There’s a cesspool down below with my name on it, not to mention a whole host of blood thirsty demons and Descended Beings fighting each other for a piece of my soul. And that’s just the ones that actually like me. You, on the other hand are special. You’re half angel. I don’t know exactly how it works, but I’m pretty sure your soul already belongs up there. Unlike most of the unlucky sods down here, you were born with one foot in the pearly gates. Now, you’re probably already in the bad books because of the company you keep. But selling out an angel? No one comes back from that. It’s irredeemable. So go home. There’s no reason for us both to get shafted.”

  She looked at his concerned expression and sighed. “I know you’re worried about me. And I appreciate the concern, Mike, really.” She took a breath. “But I can’t walk away, not now. I don’t think this angel has a choice in what he’s doing, but some part of him is still uncorrupted. He could have killed us, and he didn’t. I have to... No, I need to do something.”

  “He’s not your father.”

  “I know that! But... he knew him. I think. I can’t turn away from this. Besides,” she grinned. “You get into all sorts of trouble without me. How are you going to work solo? You get distracted too easily.”

  “Fine. But don’t let it be said I wasn’t the voice of reason in this case,” he said. He looked up at the ceiling. “And this counts as a selfless act, you bastards,” he snapped at heaven.

  “Enough talk,” said Lil. “I’m itching to get my hands on Bill. He’s got some serious explaining to do...”

  The intercom beeped loudly. Amy’s voice came over, “That guy’s here.”

  “What guy?” Lil asked impatiently.

  “The guy that wanted to see you.” There was a pause. “He says his name’s Rosewood.”

  Tome made a disgusted sound and screwed up his face.

  “Friend of yours?” asked Lil.

  “Hardly. He’s the filth.” He saw Lil’s blank look. “Regulatory Guild. Wizard police.”

  “What do they want?” She looked at him suspiciously. “You haven’t been cursing people for profit again?”

  “I’m strictly non-profit, you know that.”

  “Yeah, right. Well, let’s get rid of him, quick.” She settled into her chair behind her desk to look more professional. “Send him in,” she told Amy.

  The man who entered didn’t look like any stereotypical magic user. He was a handsome black man, clean shaven and with short dark hair. His clothes were completely black. Jacket, pants, shirt, and tie. His shoes shone so bright they were almost blinding. Almost as blinding as his teeth, which were unnaturally white. He did have a nice smile though, charming, but in a sincere way. She could tell why Tome hated him.

  “Ah, Miss Shreiber,” he said politely. He had the faintest trace of an English accent. A nice one, not like Tome’s. “It’s so nice to meet you,” he told her. His gaze turned to Tome, who leaned against the window sill behind Lil glaring at the newcomer, and for a brief second, the smile faltered. His mouth stayed still, but his eyes flared with intense dislike. “Michael Saint-Tome,” he said stiffly.

  “Roseweed,” Tome replied. “Long time no see. Not long enough of course. So, what trumped up charges are you hoping to get me with today?”

  “We both know that nothing I ever charged you with was ever trumped up.”

  “If that were true, I wouldn’t be here. I’d be doing a stretch with your other fallguys.”

  “Which reminds me,” Rosewood said icily. “Antonin says hello, and that he’ll see you soon.”

  If Tome was phased by the mention of his old mentor, he didn’t show it. “I say again, because you’re obvious getting deaf in your old age: What do you want?”

  Rosewood sat down opposite Lil and crossed his legs. His socks were, unsurprisingly, black.

  “It would seem,” he said to Lil. “That you and I have some common ground. You’re working a case that raised a few alarms in the Guild.”

  “In what way?” Lil asked.

  Rosewood reached into his jacket and pulled out a sheet of paper. He held it up for her to see. It was the copy of the summoning circle Tome had drawn and sent to his old school friend for investigation. “Derrick O’Reilly found this in his inbox yesterday,” he explained. “When he realised its relevance, he immediately sent it to us. We were surprised to say the least. I’d have been here sooner, but the customs agents in this country work in their own time zone.”

  “How is O’Reilly?” Tome asked.

  “Fine. Oh, he wanted me to give you a message, what was it...? That's right, “Get stuffed, Tome”.”

  Tome chuckled. “Ah, Derrick. Still the same old pillock.”

  “What exactly is your interest in the circle?” Lil asked. “You didn’t come all this way just to insult my partner I hope, though, believe me, I understand the sentiment.”

  “It’s not the circle that interests us at the Guild,” said Rosewood. “It’s this.” He tapped the symbol in the centre of the design. “Do you know what this is?”

  Lil hesitated. When Tome remained silent, she said, “It’s the sign of an angel. He’s being used to kill vampires that are related by blood transformation.”

  “Really?” Rosewood raised an eyebrow. “Then perhaps you would be interested to know that the angel’s name is Halaphael, and that he is one of the light keepers of the Highest Realm.”

  “Come again?” said Tome.

  “I said...”

  “I know what you said. How could you morons at the Reg Guild possibly know that? You barely know what country you’re in half the time. I once got arrested by a guy in London, who read me my rights in Spanish. I mean, do I look Spanish to you?”

  “Maybe from the side,” said Lil, not turning her gaze from Rosewood. “In the dark. If you’re really short sighted. How do you know that?” she asked Rosewood.

  “We have our sources,” Rosewood said, settling in his seat. “Halaphael has ranked quite highly in our list of interests. That he has actually manifested here in Chapter City is quite unexpected.”

  “Who is he? A fallen one?”

  “No. No angel has fallen from grace for quite some time now. Halaphael, as we are led to believe, is one of the enlightened ones. The scribes of knowledge. They compile the histories of the realms and safeguard the records. Halaphael himself is said to be a rather learned individual, a sage of great knowledge.” He paused, and brushed a speck of invisible dust from his jacket. “We have it on good authority that within the last few years, Halaphael ascended to the Highest Realm.”

  He paused again to let this sink in. “You do understand the relevance of that?”

  Lil nodded solemnly. She understood that the Highest Realm was the antithesis of the Lowest Realm. If the Lowest Realm was the
place of absolute darkness, then the Highest Realm would be the world of absolute light.

  Tome breathed out loudly. “If he was promoted, what’s he doing here?”

  “I’m getting to that. You know that when someone ascends to the Highest Realm, they don’t come back. They become part of the Light. There is no higher cause than to become a part of the Divine Light. To become one with God. Well, things aren’t what they used to be in the Higher Realms. Halaphael came back.”

  Lil gaped. Tome was silent.

  “We don’t know the specifics of this,” continued Rosewood, “but one day he was ascended upwards, the next, he was back again. But not in his entirety. He became the light, and when he descended down again, he brought some of it back with him. None of the other Ascended Beings understood this. They were confused, and Halaphael didn’t help matters. He was changed, different. Unstable. It seemed he was now capable of great violence. The others were afraid.

  “What happened next is just conjecture. We think that Halaphael was frightened himself of what he had become. The light hurt him, but he could not get rid of it, it was part of his soul now. So, he left the Higher Realms, and descended downwards into the darkness, where he hoped to quench the Light inside.”

  “He went to the Lower Realms?”

  “Bet he scared the living crap out of the locals,” said Tome.

  Rosewood nodded. “A while ago there was quite a ruckus down below. Quite a few denizens of the First Realm crossed over illegally to get out. It was the Light. It didn’t belong in that place. Halaphael hoped to quell it in the dark, but it only got worse. Desperate, Halaphael acquired a soul stone, and tried to draw the light out of himself and into it. Of course, the Light is now part of his soul. By placing it in the soulstone, he trapped his own soul.” He sighed in disappointment. “After that, we don’t know. The angel disappeared, and so did the soulstone...”

  Until, Lil thought, it was acquired by a certain cross-dressing demon and sold to a vampire. An image came to her mind. The previous night, when Tome had tried to blind the angel by throwing revelation power in its face. There had been light, blinding, painful light...

  My God, she thought. Light from the Highest Realm, and it’s here in Chapter City.

  Holy crap.

  “How can you know all of this?” she asked Rosewood.

  He shrugged. “For some time now, we’ve been compiling a vast database on the activities in the Higher Realms.”

  “Why?”

  “For a very simple reason: know thy enemy.”

  Lil almost laughed. “Your enemy?” she asked in disbelief. “Ascended Beings? How are they your enemy?”

  “I think it would be rather obvious. You have some rudimentary knowledge of the Lower Realms,” he said. “Tell me, do you know the names of all the known Desecended Beings?”

  “I can give you my address book if you want,” said Tome.

  “My point exactly,” said Rosewood, almost proudly. “We’ve spent centuries recording the names and actions of countless demons, devils and other dark beings because we’ve always considered the forces of the Lower Realms to be the serious threat. The most serious threat that has ever faced the Plane of Existence. All this time we’ve been ignoring the real threat.”

  “See,” Tome said to Lil. “I told you the Regulatory Guild were all prats.”

  “I’m starting to believe you,” she said truthfully. “Ascended Beings are creatures of purity. That is generally why they ascended upwards, rather than going downstairs with the riff raff.”

  “Oh,” said Rosewood coldly. “You’re one of those. Brought up a Christian right?”

  Lil thought about her Grandmother telling her that she would be the whore of the devil and would be sentenced to a life in damnation if she didn’t eat her greens.

  “You could say that,” she said. “Religion tends to blind people to the truth. I’ve long since weeded the crap from the facts.”

  “But you still believe that, deep down, there is a higher power in the universe that is basically good and has only our best interests at heart. But the fact is, they aren’t interested in what’s best for us, only in what’s best for them. We are basically just pawns in some unknown, divine plan, to be moved, and used, sacrificed even, to meet their own goals. I’m a simple man. I sin like the rest, but in the end, I stand on the line and keep the powers of the darkness on their side without sacrificing my ideals.”

  Tome made a rude, disbelieving noise.

  “But I find the thought that, despite everything that I do, my actions may be twisted to suit the ends of some higher beings very disturbing. Here on earth, we should not have to live our lives according to the whims of some unseen power.”

  “The Higher Realms,” Lil said, taking a tone as if she were talking to a child, “exist to show us the paths of right and wrong. Maybe to point the right course-”

  “Miss Shreiber, there is a very fine distinction between pointing out the way and luring someone to walk the path of your choosing. And if an Ascended Being wants you to walk its path, do you really think anyone would have the power to resist?”

  “You aren’t here just to be helpful are you?” said Tome darkly. “You’re here for the angel.”

  Rosewood smiled. “Of course. An honest to god angel right here on earth. One of the enlightened ones, with his soul already trapped in a soulstone. Think of what we could learn! An angel, and a sample of the divine light...”

  “You can’t be serious,” said Lil. “This is an Ascended Being we’re talking about, not a damn lab rat! You want to dissect something, take him,” she nodded at Tome. “He’s a walking mystery of medical science. His brain alone could keep scientists busy for years.”

  “Yeah,” agreed Tome with pride.

  “Oh, come now,” Rosewood said irritably. “You didn’t get that black eye sparring in the gym, Miss Shreiber. Halaphael is no longer in his right mind. He is dangerous. Seven dead already. Surely you can see that control is needed?”

  “And I suppose you want us to help you catch him?” asked Lil.

  “You seem to have a good understanding of the situation. Your assistance would be greatly appreciated.”

  “Bugger that,” said Tome. “I’d be the laughing stock of the Lower Realms. I have my reputation to think about. Why would I want to be seen working with a tosser like you?”

  Rosewood ignored him, and stared at Lil. “You understand,” he told her. “Halaphael needs help. We can help him.”

  “I don’t think you understand what it means to help someone,” said Lil. “Now, I have work to do. Please leave.”

  Rosewood stood. He seemed rather disappointed. “Perhaps, if you give yourself time to consider...”

  “If you don’t leave in the next few seconds,” Lil said levelly. “I’m going to let Mike curse you.”

  Tome looked up happily. “Really?”

  “Really.”

  He rubbed his hands together. “Heheh,” he laughed evilly. “I’ve been wanting to do this for ages...”

  “Spare me your petty threats,” said Rosewood. “I don’t intend to leave this country empty handed. And I can leave with the Guild either as your best friend or your worst enemy. You have a good day now, Miss Shreiber.”

  He left without a fuss.

  “Pity,” Tome grumbled. “I had an Altarni voodoo doll I’ve been itching to try out.”

  “We haven’t seen the last of him have we?”

  “Nope. Bloody Guild are like cockroaches. Squash one, and there are still twenty scuttling around. And Roseweed is one bloody, big-arse roach. Half of his arrests are done under suspicious circumstances. Hell, there was no way he got Antonin legally.”

  “How come you got away?” Lil asked out of interest.

  “Oh, I saved his life once,” said Tome in disgust. “Don’t look at me like that. It was an accident. I wouldn’t have done it had I realised it was him. Besides, I know the bastard. He’s the type to wear black so he can hide the dirt.
If he tries to give me the ol’ telephone book treatment, I’ll sing like a canary hooked to a nine volt battery. He wants to get rid of me, he’ll have to kill me.”

  “Would he?”

  “I don't doubt.”

  Lil shook her head. “Why does everyone want to kill you?”

  “I’m a people person. Besides, you don’t want to kill me.”

  “No, I’m your friend. I just want to kill you humanely.”

  “Thanks, appreciated. What now?”

  “Let’s find Bill.”

  “Do you even know where he is?”

  Lil thought for a second. “It’s Thursday right? I have an idea.”

  Bill’s coffee shop was joined to the building next door. He had long since converted the place into a lounge where mainly students hung out. Vampires liked students. They were considered the living version of fast food, though Bill always made the attempt to discourage eating patrons on his property.

  “You sure he’s here?” asked Tome as he climbed out of their mini.

  “Open mic night tonight. He gets the place all fixed up for the beatniks.”

  “Ew, beatniks. Let’s not hang around.”

  “Hey,” Lil said as he moved off. “Pay up.” She pointed at the parking meter.

  “Ah, I can do better than that,” said Tome happily. He took a small, round, furry ball on a piece of string from his coat and hung it on the meter. Lil had a strange urge to pet it.

  “You’re kidding,” she said. Then shrugged. “Well, you’re paying the fine.”

  She pushed open the doors and entered the darkened room. It was large and round, with a medium sized stage in one corner and the floor filled with tables.

  “Close the damn door!” yelled a recognisable voice. “I told you to use the back entrance.” Bill looked up from behind the counter and saw them. “Oh, it’s you.” He went back to wiping down the counter.

  “Expecting someone?” Lil asked.

  “Delivery men. They’re late as always, the little shites.” He wiped at a stain half-heartedly. He was still wearing the same suit they had seen him in the previous night. It was wrinkled and dishevelled. “What do you want?”

  “We’ve got to talk,” said Lil.

  “You and everyone else. As always.”

  “Spare me. I heard your misunderstood vampire routine yesterday. You lied to me.”

  “No I didn’t. I told you everything you needed to know.”

  “You said you didn’t know Anton Philips. Sabrina Jeunet said he worked for you. Which is it?”

  Bill threw down the cloth he was using and glared at her. “I suppose we get to do this all over again? I’m not in the mood.”

  “Me neither. I almost got my head ripped off last night. Your friend wasn’t so lucky.”

  “So I heard. Fat lot of good you two were. I told her you were going to help.”

  “We tried, Bill. Really.”

  “You could have tried harder,” Bill glared at her. “You know, everyone else who’s met this thing has died. How is it that you two idiots got away with hardly a scratch?”

  “I wouldn’t call this hardly a scratch,” Lil gestured to her face. “It was just dumb luck.”

  “Well, goody for you.”

  There was an awkward silence. Then Bill asked, “Did you at least see what it was?”

  “Uh, yeah.”

  “And?”

  “It was an angel, Bill.”

  He looked at her. “Exactly how hard did you hit your head?”

  “Honest to god, Bill. It’s an angel. A real Ascended Being. Someone’s using it to kill vampires.”

  “And not just any vampires,” added Tome.

  “Yeah. We figured out what connects the victims. Blood.”

  Bill turned pale. Well, paler. “Terrific.”

  “We need to clear up a few things,” Lil went on. “For starters, why did you lie about Anton Philips?”

  “Self preservation. He worked for me. I needed a few odd errands run for me. In exchange, I let him and his little coven stay in one of my buildings,” Bill shrugged. “He didn’t do anything illegal. Not that illegal anyway. Just a few things that, let’s just say, aren’t exactly smiled upon in this day and age. I have enough on my plate without Saint Ryan gunning after me on some trumped up charge.”

  “You could have just told us.”

  “I know how chummy you are with the FBI nowadays, Lil.”

  Lil gave a small laugh. “Funny how everyone but the FBI seems to think that. So tell me something, do you know who made Sabrina into a vampire?”

  “What does that matter? That’s history.”

  “All the victims, at least the one’s that the angel has specifically gone after were made into vamps by Sabrina. All except Jack Olson. They’re all dead. Someone’s killing all the vamps that come from a specific bloodline, from one specific vampire.”

  Bill groaned. “Well, that’s just... Shit. Shit shit shit!”

  “What?” asked Lil. “Bill? Is there something you want to share with the rest of the class?”

  “You two should probably take a look at something,” he replied, visibly agitated.

  He stormed away into a back room, Lil and Tome following behind. It was filled with piles of large boxes that smelled strongly of coffee. With a savage kick, he knocked away a single box that stood by itself in one corner of the room to reveal a silver summoning circle, exactly the same as all of the others that Lil had seen over the past two days, with the name William Frederick Fitz ald de Hood IV written underneath in neat handwriting. One of Bill's middle names was partially rubbed out, and the circle smeared and broken in several places.

  “God, Bill. How did you find it?” asked Lil.

  “How do you think?” said Bill. “I have enemies, some of them are smart. I always check the place for curses. Easier to pay a scryer than it is to fight off an assassin. Better for business too. My guy found this last night. I broke it as best I could. I was looking over my shoulder all night long. And I don’t dare go to sleep now...”

  “Well, you did break it,” said Tome. “It should be powerless now.”

  “Oh, sure, this one is. What about the next one? I’m a marked man. I know what this thing does. And I have no idea why someone wants to kill me, so don’t bloody ask.”

  “I have to ask, Bill,” said Lil gently. “Did you vamp Sabrina?”

  Bill sighed. “Come on,” he said sadly. “I need a drink.”

  He led them back into the lounge, where he poured out three coffees.

  “I thought you said a drink,” said Tome with mild disappointment.

  “I don’t do the hard stuff this early in the morning. Caffeine gives the system a proper jolt. You could use some. Take that cross eyed expression off your face.”

  Tome sipped his ruefully. “Not bad,” he admitted.

  Bill snorted. “How do you even know all this stuff? About the vampires being related.”

  “Apparently all of the victims have some kind of similar genetic sequence thingy. It means that they were all vamped by either the same vampire or by vampires made by that vampire.”

  “How do you know that?”

  “Science. All of the vampires killed stem from a similar bloodline. Sabrina had the same blood as all of the victims, even ones she didn’t vamp. So, did you vamp Sabrina?”

  He nodded slowly.

  “How about Jack Olson?”

  He nodded again. “A long, long time ago."

  “So,” Lil said. “He’s not killing vamps that have Sabrina’s blood type. He’s killing the ones with yours.”

  “Boy, someone must really hate you,” commented Tome.

  “You know how it is,” said Bill. “You can’t make an omelette without pissing off a few vegans.”

  “So,” said Lil thoughtfully. “The question remains, who has it in for your bloodline?”

  “Jesus Christ, you want the whole list?” said Bill impatiently. “I’m ex-royalty. Deposed. I have so many e
nemies in the old country, I couldn’t walk down the street without getting spat on.”

  “Might have something to do with the fact that you tended to eat your loyal subjects,” pointed out Tome.

  “Hey, they knew the rules. They got peace, reduced taxes, land. And if I needed to feed once in a while...”

  “Come to think of it,” said Lil. “How do we even know it’s Bill they’re after. I mean, who vamped you?”

  “Never caught her name,” said Bill with a shrug. “Some Countess. Quite the looker as I recall. Great arse. Nice pair of-”

  “Bill.”

  “Please, Lil, let the man speak,” said Tome.

  “Doesn’t matter,” Bill went on. “She got sent to the bonfire the same night. Some iffy business about bathing in the blood of virgins. I never saw the problem myself.”

  “Sure. Who doesn’t like to take a long soak in someone’s bodily fluids from time to time?”

  “That’s the point,” said Lil. “What if the killer is after everyone of her bloodline?”

  “Not likely,” said Bill with certainty. “The royal bloodlines are old. They can be charted back centuries. To the birth of mankind even. My blood comes from one of the original vampire families. They rose to power when human beings were still living in huts made of animal poop. You don’t go giving that out to every Tom, Dick and Harry that you meet.”

  “Uh, Bill, considering the vast number of vampires with your bloodline who are currently deceased...”

  “Yes, but I’m no longer royalty. Exiled, aren’t I? Cast out from the monarchy. I can vamp whomever I bloody well want. But your purebloods, your lords and princes like Von Drais, they’re bound by oath to maintain the bloodline. They are allowed to make only a single successor, and that’s it. No more. That’s why they’re so popular you see. They can’t leave victims lying about still breathing, because if their victims become infected, if they become a vampire, the royal bloodline passes to them, and with it, a right to the throne. They kill who they eat. Not particularly polite, if you ask me. Which no one ever did, which is why I’m here, and not lording over some European kingdom somewhere.”

  “So what, when the time comes to choose an heir, you just pick someone out of the crowd and vamp them?”

  “Well they have to have specific qualities,” explained Bill. “Characteristics that add to the bloodline. Like, say, looks. Athleticism. Intelligence.”

  “So how did you get in?” asked Tome, looking at Bill’s shiny scalp.

  “I’ll have you know, I have many fine qualities that added to the royal bloodline.”

  “Yeah, when you’re around, no one needs to carry a mirror.”

  “So you don’t think it’s possible,” said Lil, “that maybe someone from your past is trying to wipe out your bloodline? Remove any trace of you from returning to your throne?”

  “Please. Monkey face here is more likely to get to the throne before I do. It’s written in a charter somewhere. “Under no circumstances must William de Hood IV be allowed to return to power.” And who’d want to? I have it made here. Power, wealth. Clean streets. Do you know, they still have horses and carts running through the streets in my home country? Imagine that on a summer’s day.”

  Lil sighed. Back to square one. Again. She drummed her fingers on the counter top.

  “Well, is there anyone else that might want your entire bloodline wiped out?”

  “I already told you,” said Bill as he cleared away their mugs. “I have no idea. You two are supposed to be the detectives.”

  “Yeah, but I do detective work the same way I sit for exams,” said Tome. “Keep asking until bugger next to you gives you the answer.”

  “Which explains why you failed every test you’ve ever sat,” said Lil.

  “But no one has ever beaten my record. Twelve consecutive fails. Now that takes skill.”

  “Look, I’m glad we had this little chat,” said Bill. “And I glad we managed to clear up any misunderstandings we might have had. But I have a lot to do today. I have to settle my affairs, and get the hell out of town before sundown.”

  “You’re running?” asked Lil.

  “I know when I’m beaten. I have no intention of meeting the phantom head twister any time soon. I’m leaving the country for Paris, or maybe Greece... Either way, I have a lot of ground to cover, so if you don’t mind...” He pointed to the door.

  Lil stood up, and froze. She stared at Bill’s out stretched arm with unusual interest. “What are those?” she asked pointing to a long scar that ran completely around Bill's arm, just below the right elbow.

  “What?”

  Tome followed her gaze. “Well look at that,” he said.

  “It’s not polite to stare,” said Bill in irritation, rolling down his sleeve.

  “I’ve seen scars like that before,” said Lil. “On Delios. You’ve sewn that arm back on, haven’t you.”

  Bill rolled his eyes. “Look, it’s nothing to make a big deal about. Just a mild case of the plop, all right. But with a little treatment, plus my superior vampire immune system...”

  “But you only get CBP from the Lower Realms,” Tome said suspiciously. “What naughty things have you been up to?”

  “You know I don’t deal with the Lower Realms. I honestly don’t know how I got the plop. Probably from that little shite Evan. You know, Von Drais’ goon. I knew I shouldn’t have shaken his hand. God knows where it’s been... Hey!”

  Lil had suddenly run from the building, ignoring Bill’s annoyed cries to shut the damn door. Outside there was a traffic warden standing by their car. He was reading the meter and about to write out a ticket, when he noticed the cute, furry charm Tome had left for him. So cute and cuddly he seemed to find this, that he gave it a pat, made a few googly noises at it, and forgot all about giving them a parking ticket.

  “Told you,” said Tome as the warden walked off, and he pocketed the charm. “Money saver this. A little distracting, since it’s just so cutesy wootsy...” He shook his head to clear the spell. “Anyway, where are we going?”

  “Just get in,” said Lil, already starting the car. She almost had a head on collision as she pulled out, so engrossed with her own thoughts as she was. She kept thinking about Mister Evan, and particularly the way he kept his arm in his jacket all the time they had met him the previous night.

  “Tell me, Mike,” she said to Tome. “What are the chances of two individuals involved in the same case coming down with some obscure demonic disease?”

  “Pretty high,” said Tome catching on. “If they happened to meet in secret...”