The Decameron (Day 6 to Day 10)
Chichibio, _the Cooke to_ Messer Currado Gianfiliazzi, _by a sodainepleasant answer which he made to his Master; converted his anger intolaughter, and thereby escaped the punishment, that_ Messer _meant toimpose on him._
The Fourth Novell.
_Whereby plainly appeareth, that a sodaine witty and merry answer, dothoftentimes appease the furious choller of an angry man._
Madam _Lauretta_ sitting silent, and the answer of Lady _Nonna_ havingpast with generall applause: the Queene commanded Madame _Neiphila_to follow next in order; who instantly thus began. Although a readywit (faire Ladies) doth many times affoord worthy and commendablespeeches, according to the accidents happening to the speaker: yetnotwithstanding, Fortune (being a ready helper divers wayes to thetimorous) doth often tippe the tongue with such a present reply, as thepartie to speake, had not so much leysure as to thinke on, nor yet toinvent; as I purpose to let you perceive, by a prety short Novell.
_Messer Currado Gianfiliazzi_ (as most of you have both seene andknowen) living alwayes in our Citie, in the estate of a Noble Citizen,beeing a man bountifull, magnificent, and within the degree ofKnighthoode: continually kept both Hawkes and Hounds, taking no meanedelight in such pleasures as they yeelded, neglecting (for them) farremore serious imployments, wherewith our present subject presumeth notto meddle. Upon a day, having kilde with his Faulcon a Crane, neere toa Village called _Peretola_, and finding her to be both young and fat,he sent it to his Cooke, a _Venetian_ borne, and named _Chichibio_,with command to have it prepared for his supper. _Chichibio_, whoresembled no other, then (as he was indeede) a plaine, simple, honestmerry fellow, having drest the Crane as it ought to bee, put it on thespit, and laide it to the fire.
When it was well neere fully roasted, and gave forth a very delicatepleasing savour; it fortuned that a young Woman dwelling not far off,named _Brunetta_, and of whom _Chichibio_ was somewhat enamored,entred into the Kitchin, and feeling the excellent smell of the Crane,to please her beyond all savours, that ever she had felt before: sheentreated _Chichibio_ verie earnestly, that hee would bestow a leggethereof on her. Whereto _Chichibio_ (like a pleasant companion, andevermore delighting in singing) sung her this answer.
_My_ Brunetta, _faire and feat a, Why should you say so? The meate of my Master, Allowes you for no Taster, Go from the Kitchin go._
Many other speeches past betweene them in a short while, but in theend, _Chichibio_, because hee would not have his Mistresse _Brunetta_angrie with him; cut away one of the Cranes legges from the spit, andgave it to her to eate. Afterward, when the Fowle was served up tothe Table before _Messer Currado_, who had invited certain strangershis friends to sup with him, wondering not a little, he called for_Chichibio_ his Cook; demanding what was become of the Cranes otherlegge? Whereto the _Venetian_ (being a lyar by Nature) sodainelyanswered: Sir, Cranes have no more but one legge each Bird. _MesserCurrado_, growing verie angry, replyed. Wilt thou tell me, that aCrane hath no more but one legge? Did I never see a Crane before this?_Chichibio_ persisting resolutely in his deniall, saide. Beleeve meSir, I have told you nothing but the truth, and when you please, I willmake good my wordes, by such Fowles as are living.
Messer _Currado_, in kinde love to the strangers that hee had invitedto supper, gave over any further contestation; onely he said. Seeingthou assurest me, to let me see thy affirmation for truth, by otherof the same Fowles living (a thing which as yet I never saw, or heardof) I am content to make proofe thereof to morrow morning, till thenI shall rest satisfied: but, upon my word, if I finde it otherwise,expect such a sound payment, as thy knavery justly deserveth, to makethee remember it all thy life time. The contention ceassing for thenight season, Messer _Currado_, who though he had slept well, remainedstill discontented in his minde: arose in the morning by breake ofday, and puffing & blowing angerly, called for his horses, commanding_Chichibio_ to mount on one of them; so riding on towards the River,where (earely every morning) he had seene plenty of Cranes, he sayde tohis man; We shall see anon Sirra, whether thou or I lyed yesternight.
_Chichibio_ perceiving, that his Masters anger was not (as yet)asswaged, and now it stood him upon, to make good his lye; not knowinghow he should do it, rode after his Master, fearfully trembling allthe way. Gladly he would have made an escape, but hee could not by anypossible meanes, and on every side he looked about him, now before,and after behinde, to espy any Cranes standing on both their legges,which would have bin an ominous sight to him. But being come neere tothe River, he chanced to see (before any of the rest) upon the bankethereof, about a dozen Cranes in number, each of them standing but uponone legge, as they use to do when they are sleeping. Whereupon, shewingthem quickly to Messer _Currado_, he said. Now Sir your selfe may see,whether I told you true yesternight, or no: I am sure a Crane hath butone thigh, and one leg, as all here present are apparant witnesses, andI have bin as good as my promise.
Messer _Currado_ looking on the Cranes, and well understanding theknavery of his man, replyed: Stay but a little while sirra, & I willshew thee, that a Crane hath two thighes, and two legges. Then ridingsomwhat neerer to them, he cryed out aloud, Shough, shough, whichcaused them to set downe their other legs, and all fled away, afterthey had made a few paces against the winde for their mounting. Sogoing unto _Chichibio_, he said: How now you lying Knave, hath a Cranetwo legs, or no? _Chichibio_ being well-neere at his wits end, notknowing now what answer hee should make; but even as it came sodainlyinto his minde, said: Sir, I perceive you are in the right, and if youwould have done as much yesternight, and had cryed Shough, as here youdid: questionlesse, the Crane would then have set down the other legge,as these heere did: but if (as they) she had fled away too, by thatmeanes you might have lost your Supper.
This sodaine and unexpected witty answere, comming from such alogger-headed Lout, and so seasonably for his owne safety: was sopleasing to _Messer Currado_, that he fell into a hearty laughter, andforgetting all anger, saide. _Chichibio_, thou hast quit thy selfewell, and to my contentment: albeit I advise thee, to teach mee nomore such trickes heereafter. Thus _Chichibio_, by his sodaine andmerry answer, escaped a sound beating, which (otherwise) his master hadinflicted on him.