The Decameron, Volume II

conspicuous example in poor blunderingCalandrino, who, for the better cure of that with which in his simplicityhe supposed himself to be afflicted, had no sort of need to discover inpublic his wife's secret pleasures. Which affair has brought to my mindone that fell out contrariwise, inasmuch as the guile of one discomfitedthe good sense of another to the grievous loss and shame of thediscomfited: the manner whereof I am minded to relate to you.

  'Tis not many years since there were in Siena two young men, both of age,and both alike named Cecco, the one being son of Messer Angiulieri, theother of Messer Fortarrigo. Who, albeit in many other respects theirdispositions accorded ill, agreed so well in one, to wit, that they bothhated their fathers, that they became friends, and kept much together.Now Angiulieri, being a pretty fellow, and well-mannered, could not brookto live at Siena on the allowance made him by his father, and learningthat there was come into the March of Ancona, as legate of the Pope, acardinal, to whom he was much bounden, resolved to resort to him there,thinking thereby to improve his circumstances. So, having acquainted hisfather with his purpose, he prevailed upon him to give him there and thenall that he would have given him during the next six months, that hemight have the wherewith to furnish himself with apparel and a goodmount, so as to travel in a becoming manner. And as he was looking outfor some one to attend him as his servant, Fortarrigo, hearing of it,came presently to him and besought him with all earnestness to take himwith him as his groom, or servant, or what he would, and he would besatisfied with his keep, without any salary whatsoever. WheretoAngiulieri made answer that he was not disposed to take him, not but thathe well knew that he was competent for any service that might be requiredof him, but because he was given to play, and therewithal would at timesget drunk. Fortarrigo assured him with many an oath that he would be onhis guard to commit neither fault, and added thereto such instantentreaties, that Angiulieri was, as it were, vanquished, and consented.So one morning they took the road for Buonconvento, being minded there tobreakfast. Now when Angiulieri had breakfasted, as 'twas a very hot day,he had a bed made in the inn, and having undressed with Fortarrigo'shelp, he composed himself to sleep, telling Fortarrigo to call him on thestroke of none. Angiulieri thus sleeping, Fortarrigo repaired to thetavern, where, having slaked his thirst, he sate down to a game with somethat were there, who speedily won from him all his money, and thereafterin like manner all the clothes he had on his back: wherefore he, beinganxious to retrieve his losses, went, stripped as he was to his shirt, tothe room where lay Angiulieri; and seeing that he was sound asleep, hetook from his purse all the money that he had, and so went back to thegaming-table, and staked it, and lost it all, as he had his own.

  By and by Angiulieri awoke, and got up, and dressed, and called forFortarrigo; and as Fortarrigo answered not, he supposed that he must havehad too much to drink, and be sleeping it off somewhere, as was his wont.He accordingly determined to leave him alone; and doubting not to find abetter servant at Corsignano, he let saddle his palfrey and attach thevalise; but when, being about to depart, he would have paid the host,never a coin could he come by. Whereat there was no small stir, so thatall the inn was in an uproar, Angiulieri averring that he had been robbedin the house, and threatening to have them all arrested and taken toSiena; when, lo, who should make his appearance but Fortarrigo in hisshirt, intent now to steal the clothes, as he had stolen the moneys, ofAngiulieri? And marking that Angiulieri was accoutred for the road:--"Howis this, Angiulieri?" quoth he. "Are we to start so soon? Nay, but wait alittle. One will be here presently that has my doublet in pawn forthirty-eight soldi; I doubt not he will return it me for thirty-fivesoldi, if I pay money down." And while they were yet talking, in came onethat made it plain to Angiulieri that 'twas Fortarrigo that had robbedhim of his money, for he told him the amount that Fortarrigo had lost.Whereat Angiulieri, in a towering passion, rated Fortarrigo rightsoundly, and, but that he stood more in fear of man than of God, wouldhave suited action to word; and so, threatening to have him hanged by theneck and proclaimed an outlaw at the gallows-tree of Siena, he mountedhis horse.

  Fortarrigo, making as if 'twas not to him, but to another, thatAngiulieri thus spoke, made answer:--"Come now, Angiulieri, we were besthave done with all this idle talk, and consider the matter of substance:we can redeem for thirty-five soldi, if we pay forthwith, but if we waittill to-morrow, we shall not get off with less than thirty-eight, thefull amount of the loan; and 'tis because I staked by his advice that hewill make me this allowance. Now why should not we save these threesoldi?" Whereat Angiulieri waxed well-nigh desperate, more particularlythat he marked that the bystanders were scanning him suspiciously, as if,so far from understanding that Fortarrigo had staked and lost his,Angiulieri's money, they gave him credit for still being in funds: so hecried out:--"What have I to do with thy doublet? 'Tis high time thou wasthanged by the neck, that, not content with robbing me and gambling awaymy money, thou must needs also keep me in parley here and make mock ofme, when I would fain be gone." Fortarrigo, however, still persisted inmaking believe that Angiulieri did not mean this for him, and onlysaid:--"Nay, but why wilt not thou save me these three soldi? Think'stthou I can be of no more use to thee? Prithee, an thou lov'st me, do methis turn. Wherefore in such a hurry? We have time enough to get toTorrenieri this evening. Come now, out with thy purse. Thou knowest Imight search Siena through, and not find a doublet that would suit me sowell as this: and for all I let him have it for thirty-eight soldi, 'tisworth forty or more; so thou wilt wrong me twice over." Vexed beyondmeasure that, after robbing him, Fortarrigo should now keep him claveringabout the matter, Angiulieri made no answer, but turned his horse's head,and took the road for Torrenieri. But Fortarrigo with cunning malicetrotted after him in his shirt, and 'twas still his doublet, his doublet,that he would have of him: and when they had thus ridden two good miles,and Angiulieri was forcing the pace to get out of earshot of hispestering, Fortarrigo espied some husbandmen in a field beside the road alittle ahead of Angiulieri, and fell a shouting to them amain:--"Takethief! take thief!" Whereupon they came up with their spades and theirmattocks, and barred Angiulieri's way, supposing that he must have robbedthe man that came shouting after him in his shirt, and stopped him andapprehended him; and little indeed did it avail him to tell them who hewas, and how the matter stood. For up came Fortarrigo with a wrathfulair, and:--"I know not," quoth he, "why I spare to kill thee on the spot,traitor, thief that thou art, thus to despoil me and give me the slip!"And then, turning to the peasants:--"You see, gentlemen," quoth he, "inwhat a trim he left me in the inn, after gambling away all that he hadwith him and on him. Well indeed may I say that under God 'tis to you Iowe it that I have thus come by my own again: for which cause I shallever be beholden to you." Angiulieri also had his say; but his wordspassed unheeded. Fortarrigo with the help of the peasants compelled himto dismount; and having stripped him, donned his clothes, mounted hishorse, and leaving him barefoot and in his shirt, rode back to Siena,giving out on all hands that he had won the palfrey and the clothes fromAngiulieri. So Angiulieri, having thought to present himself to thecardinal in the March a wealthy man, returned to Buonconvento poor and inhis shirt; and being ashamed for the time to shew himself in Siena,pledged the nag that Fortarrigo had ridden for a suit of clothes, andbetook him to his kinsfolk at Corsignano, where he tarried, until hereceived a fresh supply of money from his father. Thus, then,Fortarrigo's guile disconcerted Angiulieri's judicious purpose, albeitwhen time and occasion served, it was not left unrequited.

  NOVEL V.

  --Calandrino being enamoured of a damsel, Bruno gives him a scroll,averring that, if he but touch her therewith, she will go with him: he isfound with her by his wife who subjects him to a most severe andvexatious examination.--

  So, at no great length, ended Neifile her story, which the companyallowed to pass with none too much laughter or remark: whereupon thequeen, turning to Fiammetta, bade her follow suit. Fiammetta, with mienmost gladsome, made answer that she willingly obeyed, and thus began:
--AsI doubt not, ye know, ladies most debonair, be the topic of discoursenever so well worn, it will still continue to please, if the speakerknows how to make due choice of time and occasion meet. Wherefore,considering the reason for which we are here (how that 'tis to make merryand speed the time gaily, and that merely), I deem that there is noughtthat may afford us mirth and solace but here may find time and occasionmeet, and, after serving a thousand turns of discourse, should stillprove not unpleasing for another thousand. Wherefore, notwithstandingthat of Calandrino and his doings not a little has from time to time beensaid among us, yet, considering that, as a while ago Filostrato observed,there is nought that concerns him that is not entertaining, I will makebold to add to the preceding stories another, which I might well,