The Decameron, Volume II

had Ibeen minded to deviate from the truth, have disguised, and so recountedit to you, under other names; but as whoso in telling a story divergesfrom the truth does thereby in no small measure diminish the delight ofhis hearers, I purpose for the reason aforesaid to give you the narrativein proper form.

  Niccolo Cornacchini, one of our citizens, and a man of wealth, had amongother estates a fine one at Camerata, on which he had a grand housebuilt, and engaged Bruno and Buffalmacco to paint it throughout; in whichtask, for that 'twas by no means light, they associated with them Nelloand Calandrino, and so set to work. There were a few rooms in the houseprovided with beds and other furniture, and an old female servant livedthere as caretaker, but otherwise the house was unoccupied, for whichcause Niccolo's son, Filippo, being a young man and a bachelor, was wontsometimes to bring thither a woman for his pleasure, and after keepingher there for a few days to escort her thence again. Now on one of theseoccasions it befell that he brought thither one Niccolosa, whom a vilefellow, named Mangione, kept in a house at Camaldoli as a commonprostitute. And a fine piece of flesh she was, and wore fine clothes, andfor one of her sort, knew how to comport herself becomingly and talkagreeably.

  Now one day at high noon forth tripped the damsel from her chamber in awhite gown, her locks braided about her head, to wash her hands and faceat a well that was in the courtyard of the house, and, while she was soengaged, it befell that Calandrino came there for water, and greeted herfamiliarly. Having returned his salutation, she, rather becauseCalandrino struck her as something out of the common, than for any otherinterest she felt in him, regarded him attentively. Calandrino did thelike by her, and being smitten by her beauty, found reasons enough why heshould not go back to his comrades with the water; but, as he knew notwho she was, he made not bold to address her. She, upon whom his gaze wasnot lost, being minded to amuse herself at his expense, let her glancefrom time to time rest upon him, while she heaved a slight sigh or two.Whereby Calandrino was forthwith captivated, and tarried in thecourtyard, until Filippo called her back into the chamber. Returned tohis work, Calandrino sighed like a furnace: which Bruno, who was everregardful of his doings for the diversion they afforded him, failed notto mark, and by and by:--"What the Devil is amiss with thee, comradeCalandrino?" quoth he. "Thou dost nought but puff and blow." "Comrade,"replied Calandrino, "I should be in luck, had I but one to help me." "Howso?" quoth Bruno. "Why," returned Calandrino, "'tis not to go farther,but there is a damsel below, fairer than a lamia, and so mightily in lovewith me that 'twould astonish thee. I observed it but now, when I went tofetch the water." "Nay, but, Calandrino, make sure she be not Filippo'swife," quoth Bruno. "I doubt 'tis even so," replied Calandrino, "for hecalled her and she joined him in the chamber; but what signifies it? Iwould circumvent Christ Himself in such case, not to say Filippo. Of atruth, comrade, I tell thee she pleases me I could not say how.""Comrade," returned Bruno, "I will find out for thee who she is, and ifshe be Filippo's wife, two words from me will make it all straight forthee, for she is much my friend. But how shall we prevent Buffalmaccoknowing it? I can never have a word with her but he is with me." "As toBuffalmacco," replied Calandrino: "I care not if he do know it; but letus make sure that it come not to Nello's ears, for he is of kin to MonnaTessa, and would spoil it all." Whereto:--"Thou art in the right,"returned Bruno.

  Now Bruno knew what the damsel was, for he had seen her arrive, andmoreover Filippo had told him. So, Calandrino having given over workingfor a while, and betaken him to her, Bruno acquainted Nello andBuffalmacco with the whole story; and thereupon they privily concertedhow to entreat him in regard of this love affair. Wherefore, upon hisreturn, quoth Bruno softly:--"Didst see her?" "Ay, woe's me!" repliedCalandrino: "she has stricken me to the death." Quoth Bruno:--"I will gosee if she be the lady I take her to be, and if I find that 'tis so,leave the rest to me." Whereupon down went Bruno, and found Filippo andthe damsel, and fully apprised them what sort of fellow Calandrino was,and what he had told them, and concerted with them what each should doand say, that they might have a merry time together over Calandrino'slove affair. He then rejoined Calandrino, saying:--"'Tis the very same;and therefore the affair needs very delicate handling, for, if Filippowere but ware thereof, not all Arno's waters would suffice to cleanse us.However, what should I say to her from thee, if by chance I should getspeech of her?" "I'faith," replied Calandrino, "why, first, first of all,thou wilt tell her that I wish her a thousand bushels of the good seed ofgeneration, and then that I am her servant, and if she is fainof--aught--thou tak'st me?" "Ay," quoth Bruno, "leave it to me."

  Supper-time came; and, the day's work done, they went down into thecourtyard, Filippo and Niccolosa being there, and there they tarried awhile to advance Calandrino's suit. Calandrino's gaze was soon riveted onNiccolosa, and such and so strange and startling were the gestures thathe made that they would have given sight to the blind. She on her partused all her arts to inflame his passion, primed as she had been byBruno, and diverted beyond measure as she was by Calandrino's antics,while Filippo, Buffalmacco and the rest feigned to be occupied inconverse, and to see nought of what passed. However, after a while, toCalandrino's extreme disgust, they took their leave; and as they benttheir steps towards Florence:--"I warrant thee," quoth Bruno toCalandrino, "she wastes away for thee like ice in the sunlight; by thebody o' God, if thou wert to bring thy rebeck, and sing her one or two ofthy love-songs, she'd throw herself out of window to be with thee." QuothCalandrino:--"Think'st thou, comrade, think'st thou, 'twere well Ibrought it?" "Ay, indeed," returned Bruno. Whereupon:--"Ah! comrade,"quoth Calandrino, "so thou wouldst not believe me when I told theeto-day? Of a truth I perceive there's ne'er another knows so well what hewould be at as I. Who but I would have known how so soon to win the loveof a lady like that? Lucky indeed might they deem themselves, if they didit, those young gallants that go about, day and night, up and down, astrumming on the one-stringed viol, and would not know how to gather ahandful of nuts once in a millennium. Mayst thou be by to see when Ibring her the rebeck! thou wilt see fine sport. List well what I say: Iam not so old as I look; and she knows it right well: ay, and anyhow Iwill soon let her know it, when I come to grapple her. By the very bodyof Christ I will have such sport with her, that she will follow me as anylove-sick maid follows her swain." "Oh!" quoth Bruno, "I doubt not thouwilt make her thy prey: and I seem to see thee bite her dainty vermeilmouth and her cheeks, that shew as twin roses, with thy teeth, that areas so many lute-pegs, and afterwards devour her bodily." So encouraged,Calandrino fancied himself already in action, and went about singing andcapering in such high glee that 'twas as if he would burst his skin. Andso next day he brought the rebeck, and to the no small amusement of allthe company sang several songs to her. And, in short, by frequentlyseeing her, he waxed so mad with passion that he gave over working; and athousand times a day he would run now to the window, now to the door, andanon to the courtyard on the chance of catching sight of her; nor didshe, astutely following Bruno's instructions, fail to afford himabundance of opportunity. Bruno played the go-between, bearing him heranswers to all his messages, and sometimes bringing him messages fromher. When she was not at home, which was most frequently the case, hewould send him letters from her, in which she gave great encouragement tohis hopes, at the same time giving him to understand that she was at thehouse of her kinsfolk, where as yet he might not visit her.

  On this wise Bruno and Buffalmacco so managed the affair as to divertthemselves inordinately, causing him to send her, as at her request, nowan ivory comb, now a purse, now a little knife, and other such daintytrifles; in return for which they brought him, now and again, acounterfeit ring of no value, with which Calandrino was marvellouslypleased. And Calandrino, to stimulate their zeal in his interest, wouldentertain them hospitably at table, and otherwise flatter them. Now, whenthey had thus kept him in play for two good months, and the affair wasjust where it had been, Calandrino, seeing that the work was coming to anend, and bethinking him that, if it did so before h
e had brought his loveaffair to a successful issue, he must give up all hopes of ever so doing,began to be very instant and importunate with Bruno. So, in the presenceof the damsel, and by preconcert with her and Filippo, quoth Bruno toCalandrino:--"Harkye, comrade, this lady has vowed to me a thousand timesthat she will do as thou wouldst have her, and as, for all that, she doesnought to pleasure thee, I am of opinion that she leads thee by the nose:wherefore, as she keeps not her promises, we will make her do so,willy-nilly, if thou art so