Jaq With a Q

  Silas didn’t comment on my growing community statement. He had something on his mind, something he needed to say. “I’m not okay with this at all, Oliver. Let’s get that straight right from the start.”

  “Really?” I sarcastically replied, my taste buds happy that my brother had found the coffee shop.

  “I’m being serious, Oliver. I don’t know what your plans are, and I’m not sure I want to, but I do trust you. There’s something burning in you that I haven’t seen in a very long time, probably since you used to stand over dad’s shoulder, watching him do nothing but write calculations and numbers for hours. I know there’s something going on here, I just don’t know what, but…because I know you and I know your intentions are nothing but good, I’ve got your back.”

  I nodded and slid onto the wobbly stool with a feeling of relief. This made things a whole lot easier for me. Having Silas on my side meant a lot. He’s all I had. Until now. Until Jaq. “Thanks, Silas. I needed that.”

  “Why the hell is her name Jaq anyway? Is it short for Jaqueline or something?”

  “Hmmm, I never thought about it. No, it’s Jaq. All the research I have found on her said Jaq. One elementary school I found even had her sex listed as male. I’m pretty sure that’s her birth name.”

  “What’s wrong with her?”

  “It’s not what’s wrong with her, it’s what happened to her. I don’t know, Silas.”

  Our talk about Jaq was interrupted by a car door. After a peculiar glance toward each other, we walked to the front door. Silas stepped out first and then me, the screen door creaking open and then slamming behind me.

  Silas stepped in front of me in a protective stance, one I didn’t understand just yet. Not until he spoke.

  “You the Benson boys?”

  My heart instantly dropped, my hands went numb, and a lump swelled in my chest. Angry adrenaline I hadn’t felt in years surged through my veins when I stepped around Silas and glared at him. His police car was updated, his uniform changed from gray to blue, and he looked older, but it was him.

  “You should know who we are,” I said, my voice sounding a lot stronger than I felt.

  “What are you doing here?”

  “We own the place. Taxes paid up and everything. What are you doing here?”

  “Oliver,” Silas said, a tight hand gripping my forearm when I tried to take another step.

  “No, he has no business here. This is private property and we didn’t give him permission to be here.”

  The cocky officer hadn’t changed a bit; he didn’t care that my dad was inside that building any more now than he had back then. “This is a courtesy call. Just because this place is miles from town, people still call me, and it’s still my jurisdiction. When I get calls about strangers lurking around, you can bet your ass I’m going to check it out. This is my town. Don’t you forget it. If you think you’re coming back here for a repeat of what happened to your old man, you might want to think again.”

  Silas’s response beat mine, a whole lot nicer than the one on the tip of my tongue. “We didn’t come here for any trouble, Sheriff, and lucky for you neither of us followed in our father’s footsteps. I’m a businessman and Oliver here writes text books. He’s going to fix the place up and work from here for a while. You don’t have to worry about science labs.”

  “Then welcome home. I truly am sorry about your dad. We’re having a spring festival downtown next weekend. You boys are more than welcome to come.”

  Again, Silas beat me to the punch. I wanted to tell the slime ball to get off my property and never come back, to go to hell, and fuck off. Silas handled it. Thank God. “Thank you, we’ll see if it works out. You have a nice day. It looks like it’s going to be a beauty,” he said, eye’s looking up to the beautiful blue sky, puffy white clouds, and the sun felt on our faces.

  The sheriff tipped his hat, smiled at us, and got in his car without another word.

  Silas leaned against the post, one arm crossing over the other, and eyes on the leaving car. “You’re not building a lab are you, Oliver?”

  I kept from telling the truth by ignoring it. “You have no idea how much I wanted to jump off this porch and beat the shit out of that guy.”

  “Oh, yes I do. Believe me. I wanted to hold him while you did it. Come on. I bought bacon and eggs. Let’s see if we can get the stove to work.”

  Silas made breakfast while I swept inches of pine needles from the picnic table, only to throw it off the deck, the wood too gone to save. We ate on the front steps, our plates in our laps, and the lake in our view. God, it felt so good to be there.

  “When are you planning to do all this, Oliver?”

  “Soon. I’m giving my two weeks’ notice Monday morning. Can you get me some Propofol?”

  Silas beat his chest, spitting the ingested coffee to the ground in front of him. “Please tell me you’re joking. Are you planning to kidnap her or kill her?”

  I rolled my eyes at the silly thought. “Please, give me a break. One, I’m only using it as an element, and I only need one CC. I’m not an idiot. I’m pretty sure this isn’t your department. You’re the businessman, remember?”

  Silas wanted to say more. Lots more, but he didn’t. He dipped his toast in his egg and agreed to help me. “Okay, I said I would trust you. I’ll see what I can do.”

  “Thank you.”

  Although it was written all over his face, Silas never said a word about girly things I piled into my cart. He wanted to, and I could tell he fought hard not to, but he didn’t. A few failed attempts to mask a groan, and many eye rolls, but no words. He even helped me pick out a mattress, deciding on a fluffy, soft pillow top. Lucky for me, it was in stock, but I had to pay the guy fifty bucks to bring it out in his own truck after he closed up for the night. It was either that or schedule a delivery that I couldn’t pinpoint. And to be perfectly honest, I intended to sleep way better than Silas. The much firmer bed I had chosen for myself wasn’t in stock. I would have to schedule that one.

  With trivial conversation to be polite, I answered the guy’s questions while he entered my information. From those meaningless words came useful information. I mentioned needing a garage built, and he gave his brother in-law a call, a general contractor for steel buildings. After a quick call to make sure it was okay, Silas and I headed there next.

  It just felt right. Like everything was in alignment, paving the way with my intent. This was meant to happen, and as crazy as it sounded, I believed that with everything in me. This guy knowing a roofer was proof. For me, anyway. Silas was still biting his tongue, his nails chewed to the quick.

  I talked to Jaq a few times throughout the day, and had an amazing time with my brother. We stopped and got beer, bait, and steaks, deciding to venture through the overgrown yard to the lake. Reminiscing about the fun we’d had off the dock neither of us dared to step upon, I texted the contractor, adding a new dock to my list. I could code the electronics for a rocket ship, but building a dock wasn’t in my best interest.

  We stayed down by the lake until the new mattress showed up wrapped in plastic. Silas helped me carry the old one to the burn pile I had started out back, and then to my surprise, he helped me with the room. He even ironed the wrinkles out of the transparent sheers before hanging them over the doors. I made the bed with the fresh white linen, a lavender scent filling the room. I thought about replacing the cherry wood furniture for something lighter but then thought against it. It was a nice matching set and with a little bit of white lace and hint of pink, I was sure Jaq would love it.

  “This doesn’t even look like the same room. Here, grab that end,” Silas ordered, his foot kicking out on the new rug.

  I placed my end on the floor and we both gave it a shove with the tips of our sneakers. “I know. She’s going to love it here. I can’t wait for her to see it. Oh, the pictures. Let’s hang those.”

  “You do that. I’ll decorate the bathroom.”

  For two grown men who knew noth
ing about fashion, we did a pretty damn good job, even if I have to say so myself. Silas took great pride in making sure my spotless bathroom looked perfect. Even with the rustic feel, it was pretty. A girl like Jaq would love it, especially the deep claw foot tub full of scented bubbles.

  “Damn, bro. This looks sick.”

  Silas beamed with pride, a goofy smile staring at me through the clean mirror. “Right, but aren’t you afraid of her hurting herself?”

  “What do you mean?” I questioned.

  Silas held up the white toothbrush holder with pink butterflies. “Glass. Do you really think you should let her have stuff like this?”

  I frowned and took it from his hand, placing it neatly on the swirly gray marble. “She’s not going to hurt herself with glass. She’s not like that.”

  With both hands in the air, Silas took a step back. “Whoa, Oliver. No need to get defensive. I didn’t mean anything by it. It was just a question.”

  I shook my head at myself and apologized. “Yeah, sorry. I’m just tired. Let’s call it a night. You can shower first.”

  “Shower? I’m soaking in this tub with these God-awful smelling bubbles. What the hell is this?”

  I laughed at the skew on Silas’s face, the purple bottle to his nose. “I don’t know. Lavender. The lady at the store told me it was soothing.”

  “Well, I’m about to be soothed.”

  I left Silas, walked out to the porch and breathed in fresh country air, a sense of wellbeing coming over me. For the first time in a very long time, I felt like I had a purpose, and it sure felt good to be back at the lake.

  Just when I was about to dial Jaq, my phone rang. She beat me to it. “Hello, my little Hershey’s Kiss.”

  “Why did you call me that? Is that a racial thing? It is, isn’t it?”

  I laughed, jugging the last of my beer. “No, Jaq. It wasn’t a racial slur. I honestly don’t know why I said that. It just popped into my mind.”

  “I know why. You think I’m the odd ball, a shiny piece of chocolate in a bowl full of Skittles.”

  Wow. I was a little impressed. That’s exactly what I was thinking. “You sort of are. I think that’s why I like you so much. Who wants to be like all the other Skittles?”

  “I think you’re the oddball in a bowl of Skittles, too. Maybe that’s why I don’t hate you. I don’t like you, but I don’t hate you.”

  I plopped to the top step, sitting with a smile. “Great, we’re a pair of chocolates wrapped in silver tin, the oddballs in a bowl of colorful Skittles. Perfect.”

  Jaq sounded more relaxed than she had since I had come to the lake, that hint of sass in her tone almost playful. We talked until Silas emerged thirty-minutes later.”

  “I’m going to go spend some time with my brother. I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay?”

  “Oh, okay, yeah, you should do that.”

  “Goodnight, Jaq.”

  “Ollie?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Maybe you can bring food tomorrow.”

  I smiled, a puff of air escaping from my lips. “That would be nice. We’ll talk about it tomorrow.”

  “I changed my mind. I like rose scented bubbles. My skin feels like a soft female. Smell me,” Silas said.

  I shoved his arm from my nose and took the offered beer from his hand. “I may not need the Propofol. I’m having supper with Jaq tomorrow night. If all goes as planned, she’ll come on her own free will.”

  “Thank God. That makes it a little better.”

  Silas and I parted ways at the airport at five o’clock the next morning. I hadn’t planned on leaving that early, but Silas had a business brunch and needed to get to Pittsburg. Of course, I wasn’t about to let him call a cab. We drove out of the sleepy little town, talking about how much it had grownup since we’d left there. We talked more about Jaq, and then what Silas had going on. No lucky ladies, of course, but even with the man-whore that he was, I was proud. Very proud.

  We hugged at his terminal, saying goodbye, and promising not to let so much time pass by before getting together again. “I’m going to want to meet this famous, Jaq. You know that, right?”

  I nodded, bumping his shoulder with mine. “In time. I haven’t even met her yet. That might take a minute.”

  Silas slapped me on the back, tossing his brown leather bag over his shoulder. “Yeah, I’m just going to jump on a plane and pretend like that doesn’t scare the hell out of me.”

  “Travel safe.”

  “Always.”

  I did a lot of soul searching during the wee hours of the morning. Knowing Jaq did her sleeping after sunrise, gave me five hours of nothing but open road. No music, the only noise coming from my own tires and an occasional car. The act of exaggerated silence filled me with a pure sense of calm, and I let it all go. For five straight hours I drove in somewhat of a trance, letting it all go. I didn’t think about the what if’s, the how’s, the questions, or the answers. Keeping my car between the lines was my only focus. Everything else was set aside. A minor case of curable amnesia reminded me how important being still was to my dad.

  Silas and I would lay on each side of him, a sky filled with fluffy white clouds, or a dark night full of twinkling stars. Sometimes for hours. No words, but a peaceful knowing that isn’t explainable, not without getting into quantum physics, complicated formulas, and debatable philosophies. I forgot how serene it was to just be still, promising to practice it again once I made it back to the lake with Jaq.

  It wasn’t until after Jaq’s late morning call that my mind started to think about all that I had to do. Of course she changed her mind about me coming for dinner, but that didn’t worry me. She promised I could come up after work the next day, but I wasn’t holding my breath. At least, it was something, more than I had gotten so far.

  Jaq seemed to be little bit better every day, with me anyway. She became very comfortable about calling me, very quickly. The last time I spoke to her was just before ten. She called me right after Silas called to tell me the good news. He’d just gotten involved with another merger, a business he couldn’t wait to dig his hands into. I was interested, and I was excited for him, but I was exhausted, tired from working all weekend, driving, and talking to Jaq all hours of the night.

  I felt bad for rushing our call, but I honestly couldn’t help it. I was beat. Jaq said she understood and sadly said goodbye. She promised again to let me come up the next morning, but I wasn’t holding my breath, sure she’d change her mind by morning.

  She didn’t. I was beginning to feel my nerves twitching by lunch time when she asked for Italian and cheesecake. I hadn’t thought about it really happening. It kept my focus the entire day, quick bouts of adrenaline rushing through my veins every time I thought about it. Would she talk to me like she did on the phone or would she clam up like she did when Wallace came in? I’d already decided it didn’t matter. I would still talk; I would talk and try like hell to get her to talk back, but it didn’t matter whether she spoke or not. Just being there with her was enough, a huge breakthrough.

  I had just decided to give my notice after my last break when I was called into Martin’s office. Might as well get it over with, I decided, taking a seat in front of his desk.

  “I had a lot of hope in you when you started here, Oliver,” he began, two fingers splitting the blinds behind his desk. “You’re very good at what you do, but I’m a little concerned about your attendance over the past month or so. Is there something going on you need to discuss with me?”

  I barely heard what he said. Wallace’s number strolling across my phone had my attention. Why would he be calling me? Wallace didn’t call me, I called him. “Excuse me, I have to take this.”

  “Oh, well, sure, go ahead.” Martin sarcastically replied, giving me permission with an open hand.

  “Wallace?”

  “Dude, they just take Jaq outta here in a squad.”

  For a brief second, I was stunned, all the blood in my body dropping to my feet. ?
??What do you mean? Why?”

  “Jake say she went crazy because the landlord busted the door in.”

  I walked out the door, uncaring of Martin’s threats to fire me if I left, extremely pleased that I’d driven, yet pissed off that it would take me twenty minutes to get it out of the parking garage and with the way traffic was, another hour to get to her.

  “Why? Why did he do that?”

  “She overflow the toilet and locked herself in the bathroom. She freaked the fuck out.”

  “Where is she? What hospital?”

  “Lower Manhattan.”

  Chapter Eight

  “Jaq Tarantino, where is she?”

  “Calm down, sir. Give me the first name,” the lady behind the window calmly said.

  “Jaq with a q, J-A-Q.”

  “And the last name?”

  “Tarantino, I just told you that. She was just brought in.”

  The lady dropped her arms, stopped what she was doing, and gave me a dirty look. “This is a big hospital, there are lots of people in the ER today. I’m trying to find him for you.”

  “Her, she’s a her, and I’m sorry.”

  “Apology accepted. Now, are you a relative?”

  “Not exactly. I’m a doctor. Psychiatrist,” I added, not telling the whole truth. I did have that degree, I just hadn’t taken the politically correct, continuous education to keep my license, nor did I take the mandated sate testing to legally practice. That job became boring very quickly, and I gave it up by the time I turned twenty-one.

  “Oh, well, next time tell me that up front. This way, Dr.?” she questioned over her shoulder.

  I anxiously followed, my nerves jumping out of my skin. “Benson.”

  The emergency room was busy, as busy as the rushing adrenaline, flooding my veins. I was about to see her for the first time, and I didn’t know how she would react, how I would react. What if she freaked out on me, too? What if she—.

  For a brief second, I froze. I couldn’t move, and I couldn’t explain why. Jaq was asleep, her wrists and ankles bound with leather straps. She looked so—so perfect.