History of Tom Jones, a Foundling

  Chapter xiv.

  A most dreadful chapter indeed; and which few readers ought to ventureupon in an evening, especially when alone.

  Jones swallowed a large mess of chicken, or rather cock, broth, with avery good appetite, as indeed he would have done the cock it was madeof, with a pound of bacon into the bargain; and now, finding inhimself no deficiency of either health or spirit, he resolved to getup and seek his enemy.

  But first he sent for the serjeant, who was his first acquaintanceamong these military gentlemen. Unluckily that worthy officer having,in a literal sense, taken his fill of liquor, had been some timeretired to his bolster, where he was snoring so loud that it was noteasy to convey a noise in at his ears capable of drowning that whichissued from his nostrils.

  However, as Jones persisted in his desire of seeing him, a vociferousdrawer at length found means to disturb his slumbers, and to acquainthim with the message. Of which the serjeant was no sooner madesensible, than he arose from his bed, and having his clothes alreadyon, immediately attended. Jones did not think fit to acquaint theserjeant with his design; though he might have done it with greatsafety, for the halberdier was himself a man of honour, and had killedhis man. He would therefore have faithfully kept this secret, orindeed any other which no reward was published for discovering. But asJones knew not those virtues in so short an acquaintance, his cautionwas perhaps prudent and commendable enough.

  He began therefore by acquainting the serjeant, that as he was nowentered into the army, he was ashamed of being without what wasperhaps the most necessary implement of a soldier; namely, a sword;adding, that he should be infinitely obliged to him, if he couldprocure one. "For which," says he, "I will give you any reasonableprice; nor do I insist upon its being silver-hilted; only a goodblade, and such as may become a soldier's thigh."

  The serjeant, who well knew what had happened, and had heard thatJones was in a very dangerous condition, immediately concluded, fromsuch a message, at such a time of night, and from a man in such asituation, that he was light-headed. Now as he had his wit (to usethat word in its common signification) always ready, he bethoughthimself of making his advantage of this humour in the sick man. "Sir,"says he, "I believe I can fit you. I have a most excellent piece ofstuff by me. It is not indeed silver-hilted, which, as you say, dothnot become a soldier; but the handle is decent enough, and the bladeone of the best in Europe. It is a blade that--a blade that--in short,I will fetch it you this instant, and you shall see it and handle it.I am glad to see your honour so well with all my heart."

  Being instantly returned with the sword, he delivered it to Jones, whotook it and drew it; and then told the serjeant it would do very well,and bid him name his price.

  The serjeant now began to harangue in praise of his goods. He said(nay he swore very heartily), "that the blade was taken from a Frenchofficer, of very high rank, at the battle of Dettingen. I took itmyself," says he, "from his side, after I had knocked him o' the head.The hilt was a golden one. That I sold to one of our fine gentlemen;for there are some of them, an't please your honour, who value thehilt of a sword more than the blade."

  Here the other stopped him, and begged him to name a price. Theserjeant, who thought Jones absolutely out of his senses, and verynear his end, was afraid lest he should injure his family by askingtoo little. However, after a moment's hesitation, he contented himselfwith naming twenty guineas, and swore he would not sell it for less tohis own brother.

  "Twenty guineas!" says Jones, in the utmost surprize: "sure you thinkI am mad, or that I never saw a sword in my life. Twenty guineas,indeed! I did not imagine you would endeavour to impose upon me. Here,take the sword--No, now I think on't, I will keep it myself, and showit your officer in the morning, acquainting him, at the same time,what a price you asked me for it."

  The serjeant, as we have said, had always his wit (_in sensupraedicto_) about him, and now plainly saw that Jones was not in thecondition he had apprehended him to be; he now, therefore,counterfeited as great surprize as the other had shown, and said, "Iam certain, sir, I have not asked you so much out of the way. Besides,you are to consider, it is the only sword I have, and I must run therisque of my officer's displeasure, by going without one myself. Andtruly, putting all this together, I don't think twenty shillings wasso much out of the way."

  "Twenty shillings!" cries Jones; "why, you just now asked me twentyguineas."--"How!" cries the serjeant, "sure your honour must havemistaken me: or else I mistook myself--and indeed I am but half awake.Twenty guineas, indeed! no wonder your honour flew into such apassion. I say twenty guineas too. No, no, I mean twenty shillings, Iassure you. And when your honour comes to consider everything, I hopeyou will not think that so extravagant a price. It is indeed true, youmay buy a weapon which looks as well for less money. But----"

  Here Jones interrupted him, saying, "I will be so far from making anywords with you, that I will give you a shilling more than yourdemand." He then gave him a guinea, bid him return to his bed, andwished him a good march; adding, he hoped to overtake them before thedivision reached Worcester.

  The serjeant very civilly took his leave, fully satisfied with hismerchandize, and not a little pleased with his dexterous recovery fromthat false step into which his opinion of the sick man'slight-headedness had betrayed him.

  As soon as the serjeant was departed, Jones rose from his bed, anddressed himself entirely, putting on even his coat, which, as itscolour was white, showed very visibly the streams of blood which hadflowed down it; and now, having grasped his new-purchased sword in hishand, he was going to issue forth, when the thought of what he wasabout to undertake laid suddenly hold of him, and he began to reflectthat in a few minutes he might possibly deprive a human being of life,or might lose his own. "Very well," said he, "and in what cause do Iventure my life? Why, in that of my honour. And who is this humanbeing? A rascal who hath injured and insulted me without provocation.But is not revenge forbidden by Heaven? Yes, but it is enjoined by theworld. Well, but shall I obey the world in opposition to the expresscommands of Heaven? Shall I incur the Divine displeasure rather thanbe called--ha--coward--scoundrel?--I'll think no more; I am resolved,and must fight him."

  The clock had now struck twelve, and every one in the house were intheir beds, except the centinel who stood to guard Northerton, whenJones softly opening his door, issued forth in pursuit of his enemy,of whose place of confinement he had received a perfect descriptionfrom the drawer. It is not easy to conceive a much more tremendousfigure than he now exhibited. He had on, as we have said, alight-coloured coat, covered with streams of blood. His face, whichmissed that very blood, as well as twenty ounces more drawn from himby the surgeon, was pallid. Round his head was a quantity of bandage,not unlike a turban. In the right hand he carried a sword, and in theleft a candle. So that the bloody Banquo was not worthy to be comparedto him. In fact, I believe a more dreadful apparition was never raisedin a church-yard, nor in the imagination of any good people met in awinter evening over a Christmas fire in Somersetshire.

  When the centinel first saw our heroe approach, his hair began gentlyto lift up his grenadier cap; and in the same instant his knees fellto blows with each other. Presently his whole body was seized withworse than an ague fit. He then fired his piece, and fell flat on hisface.

  Whether fear or courage was the occasion of his firing, or whether hetook aim at the object of his terror, I cannot say. If he did,however, he had the good fortune to miss his man.

  Jones seeing the fellow fall, guessed the cause of his fright, atwhich he could not forbear smiling, not in the least reflecting on thedanger from which he had just escaped. He then passed by the fellow,who still continued in the posture in which he fell, and entered theroom where Northerton, as he had heard, was confined. Here, in asolitary situation, he found--an empty quart pot standing on thetable, on which some beer being spilt, it looked as if the room hadlately been inhabited; but at present it was entirely vacant.

  Jones then apprehended it might l
ead to some other apartment; but uponsearching all round it, he could perceive no other door than that atwhich he entered, and where the centinel had been posted. He thenproceeded to call Northerton several times by his name; but no oneanswered; nor did this serve to any other purpose than to confirm thecentinel in his terrors, who was now convinced that the volunteer wasdead of his wounds, and that his ghost was come in search of themurderer: he now lay in all the agonies of horror; and I wish, withall my heart, some of those actors who are hereafter to represent aman frighted out of his wits had seen him, that they might be taughtto copy nature, instead of performing several antic tricks andgestures, for the entertainment and applause of the galleries.

  Perceiving the bird was flown, at least despairing to find him, andrightly apprehending that the report of the firelock would alarm thewhole house, our heroe now blew out his candle, and gently stole backagain to his chamber, and to his bed; whither he would not have beenable to have gotten undiscovered, had any other person been on thesame staircase, save only one gentleman who was confined to his bed bythe gout; for before he could reach the door to his chamber, the hallwhere the centinel had been posted was half full of people, some intheir shirts, and others not half drest, all very earnestly enquiringof each other what was the matter.

  The soldier was now found lying in the same place and posture in whichwe just now left him. Several immediately applied themselves to raisehim, and some concluded him dead; but they presently saw theirmistake, for he not only struggled with those who laid their hands onhim, but fell a roaring like a bull. In reality, he imagined so manyspirits or devils were handling him; for his imagination beingpossessed with the horror of an apparition, converted every object hesaw or felt into nothing but ghosts and spectres.

  At length he was overpowered by numbers, and got upon his legs; whencandles being brought, and seeing two or three of his comradespresent, he came a little to himself; but when they asked him what wasthe matter? he answered, "I am a dead man, that's all, I am a deadman, I can't recover it, I have seen him." "What hast thou seen,Jack?" says one of the soldiers. "Why, I have seen the young volunteerthat was killed yesterday." He then imprecated the most heavy curseson himself, if he had not seen the volunteer, all over blood, vomitingfire out of his mouth and nostrils, pass by him into the chamber whereEnsign Northerton was, and then seizing the ensign by the throat, flyaway with him in a clap of thunder.

  This relation met with a gracious reception from the audience. All thewomen present believed it firmly, and prayed Heaven to defend themfrom murder. Amongst the men too, many had faith in the story; butothers turned it into derision and ridicule; and a serjeant who waspresent answered very coolly, "Young man, you will hear more of this,for going to sleep and dreaming on your post."

  The soldier replied, "You may punish me if you please; but I was asbroad awake as I am now; and the devil carry me away, as he hath theensign, if I did not see the dead man, as I tell you, with eyes as bigand as fiery as two large flambeaux."

  The commander of the forces, and the commander of the house, were nowboth arrived; for the former being awake at the time, and hearing thecentinel fire his piece, thought it his duty to rise immediately,though he had no great apprehensions of any mischief; whereas theapprehensions of the latter were much greater, lest her spoons andtankards should be upon the march, without having received any suchorders from her.

  Our poor centinel, to whom the sight of this officer was not much morewelcome than the apparition, as he thought it, which he had seenbefore, again related the dreadful story, and with many additions ofblood and fire; but he had the misfortune to gain no credit witheither of the last-mentioned persons: for the officer, though a veryreligious man, was free from all terrors of this kind; besides, havingso lately left Jones in the condition we have seen, he had nosuspicion of his being dead. As for the landlady, though not overreligious, she had no kind of aversion to the doctrine of spirits; butthere was a circumstance in the tale which she well knew to be false,as we shall inform the reader presently.

  But whether Northerton was carried away in thunder or fire, or inwhatever other manner he was gone, it was now certain that his bodywas no longer in custody. Upon this occasion the lieutenant formed aconclusion not very different from what the serjeant is just mentionedto have made before, and immediately ordered the centinel to be takenprisoner. So that, by a strange reverse of fortune (though not veryuncommon in a military life), the guard became the guarded.