In The Dark
Not that she cares. I don’t think she goes to school for academic pursuits. More like to get drunk and party.
“Hey Audrey.” I give her a hug because she’s not giving me any choice. She practically tackles me, her arms going around me tight. “You knew I’d be here, remember?”
“Oh, that’s right. I guess I forgot.” She laughs and steps out of my embrace, then nudges her equally skinny friend with an elbow in the ribs, like they’re in on some joke. “It’s so good to see you! You look amazing.”
“Yeah, you’re looking good too,” I offer weakly, glancing around her to see if I can spot the yellow dress, but she’s gone.
Shit.
“What have you been up to?” Audrey asks.
“Not much.” I shove my hands in the front pockets of my shorts, glancing around, seeing nothing, no pretty yellow dress and long, wavy dark hair. I want out of here. I don’t want to talk to Audrey, I want to go home and forget this stupid night ever happened. What a waste of time. I pull my keys out of my pocket and clutch them tight.
“Don’t tell me you’re already leaving. It’s still early.” Audrey reaches out and touches my wrist, trying to wrap her fingers around it. “We only just got here. I’d love to catch up with you. See what you’re up to.”
“Yeah, sorry I can’t stick around but I gotta go.” I offer her a sympathetic smile. “I have an early class tomorrow and being the first day and all, I don’t want to make a bad impression right out the gate. You know what I mean?” I’m so full of shit it’s almost painful.
“Oh wow. Who knew you were so studious?” She offers me a coy smile. “That’s so sexy.”
I almost roll my eyes but refrain myself. “I’ll see you around then?”
“You know it,” she says just before she and her friend dissolve into giggles as they rush toward the front door of the bar. They push open the glass door, loud music and the sound of drunken females singing off key wafting out and I wince.
“Damn it,” I mutter once the door shuts behind them, thankful the bad singing is nothing but muffled, indistinct noise now. I run my hand through my hair and stare off into the distance, going over what I saw—what I thought I saw. Thwarted in my pursuit of the yellow dress. Though it was most likely pure speculation on my part. I want to find Lucy so fucking bad I think I see her in every dark haired chick out there. I’m being stupid.
I’m acting like a damn fool.
My last class of the day is packed, in one of those auditorium style rooms where there are rows stacked upon rows of seats with those tiny desks that can barely accommodate a tablet, let alone your laptop. The giant room could probably seat two hundred, maybe even more, and I swear the room was more than half full.
More like mostly full.
Considering the university has a strong business program I guess I shouldn’t be surprised at the packed attendance. I’m not a business major, but I thought a course in Principals in Marketing would be a smart choice since I’m a marketing major. Plus, it sounded interesting. I took the majority of my general education courses in community college but there are a few I still need to pick up. This semester includes one general ed course and the rest are classes that go toward my major.
If I work really hard and push myself to take summer school, I’ll graduate in another two years. That’ll save me time and money, both things I desperately need.
I finally found the building after trudging across the huge campus in the boiling hot sun, and dashed into the room with barely a minute to spare. Hot and pretty much out of breath, I sat in a seat in the back row at the very top.
The professor was down at the bottom of the room, so far away he was just a tiny speck of a man standing next to the podium, a desk to his right just behind him. He looks young, dressed in a pale blue button down with the sleeves rolled up and khakis, and when I glance around the room, I realize I’m in a class mostly filled with females. Many of them are watching him with what I can only describe as adoring looks on their faces, with lots of giggling and whispering included.
Hmm. Looks to me like they’re hot for teacher.
The room is warm and it’s early afternoon. I’m tired from staying up too late last night at the bar with Gina and waking up early this morning with a serious case of nerves—plus the teeniest hangover. I’ve been going to the local community college for the last two years, went there straight after high school. You’d think this was no big deal, transferring to a big university.
But the campus is huge, like this sprawling, intricate maze I keep getting lost in. There are so many people here, way more than at my old college. I lost my way more than once today, getting completely turned around even after having a tour of this place and a map to follow. I even used Siri on my phone and that bitch was no help.
Doesn’t help that Professor Bailey is droning on about the class syllabus, what he expects from us, how we’re going to be working on group projects a lot throughout the semester and our final grade will depend a whopping fifty percent on them. A lot of the same type of information I heard in my previous classes so I’m feeling a little bored. A lot sleepy. I rest my chin on my fist, my elbow propped on the tiny desk and my eyes slide kind of half closed.
Okay, there’s no kind of about it. My eyes are closed. It’s warm. So very, deliciously warm. And he keeps talking in this deep, monotone voice I find soothing. He’s attractive yes, but it’s not a good trait when he can put me to sleep within ten minutes of hearing him talk. Not that I’m hot for teacher. No, I’m completely ridiculous and still holding onto feelings for a guy who’s completely unattainable.
At least I had him though, right? Even if only for a little while…
My mind drifts down the rabbit hole known as Gabe Land. Just thinking about him makes me tingle in all the good places. I saw a guy earlier today walking ahead of me while I was trying to find the building for my second class, and the way he moved reminded me of Gabe. He almost swaggered, his posture perfect, his wide shoulders straight. He wore a T-shirt and cargo shorts, something Gabe would wear and I was so tempted to run up and catch him. Grab his hand and anticipate seeing his handsome face as he turned to look at me.
Then again, I wouldn’t want Gabe to be on campus with me…would I? It was difficult enough, having to keep up the pretense of being a rich girl with him. Not that it seemed to matter. Most of the time when we hung out, we never talked about our pasts or our families, or money or any of that stuff. We kept it easy. Simple. I know he’s not a big fan of his family and really, I kept my mouth shut most of the time. I was so quiet most of the time that he told me I intrigued him.
Me. The mysterious girl. Imagine that.
But with Gabe, I was. I pretended to go along with his assessments of me because his speculation gave me a break. I didn’t have to come up with a backstory and it was awesome. He did all the hard work for me. And though I played along with his plan, like I was the poor little rich girl neglected by her daddy and always seeking his love, it kind of sucked.
I didn’t like being a liar. It hurt, holding back my truth from him. Would he really care? He didn’t seem judgmental but I don’t know. I’m sure his parents wouldn’t approve of me. Maybe Gabe ultimately wouldn’t approve of me either. Fun enough to fuck around with, but get serious with the girl? That was another thing entirely.
Ouch. Just thinking that is painful.
Though I was the one who insisted on it being just a summer affair between us, I did that to save my heart. I didn’t want to develop feelings for him because it was pointless. Nothing would ever happen between us.
Nothing.
The professor is still droning on and I close my eyes briefly once. Twice. A little longer every time. I could sleep just like this. Well, maybe not full on sleep but definitely doze. Yeah, doze off for a little bit. Not like I’m missing anything. I already read the class syllabus online earlier this morning when I couldn’t sleep. I know what’s expected of us for the semester. After class, I still need to g
o to the bookstore and pick up a few books. I only have two classes tomorrow and I’ll be done by noon. I’m taking fifteen units this semester and if I can get a job on campus I could earn a couple more units for that as well…
My elbow gives out and I nearly drop my chin on the desk as I fall forward. The entire thing happened in maybe five seconds tops but that was enough to create a loud ruckus that caused every head in the room to swivel up and look straight at me.
“Did you have something you wanted to say?” Professor Bailey called up to me.
I shake my head, my cheeks hot with embarrassment. I’m such an idiot. First day of school and I make a horrible impression. Tonight I’m going to bed early, I don’t care what Gina wants to do. I refuse to fall into the partying lifestyle. I can’t put my education at risk. It’s about the only thing I’ve got to help me gain a solid career and a better life. “No, I’m sorry to interrupt.” I offer him a tiny smile.
He doesn’t smile in return, just resumes talking. What a grump. Slowly, surely, everyone turns around and faces him once more and I breathe a sigh of relief. Could I be more obvious or what?
It’s like someone is still watching me though. I feel every hair on my body stand on end and I subtly look around, hoping to catch someone blatantly staring at me. But I see no one looking in my direction. My skin feels hot. Itchy. I press my lips together and drop my head, staring blindly at my tablet’s empty note page. I broke down and bought an iPad for school, though it’s used. I couldn’t bring myself to spend top dollar.
That being watched feeling is still so strong. I lift my head quickly, hoping to catch someone and that’s when I see him. A quick turn of his head, like he was never looking in my direction in the first place, and I stare at the back of his head, practically willing him to turn around with my mind.
He doesn’t. I continue to stare. It’s like he knows I’m watching him now and I drop my head, let my hair fall in front of my face, though I can still see him.
Slowly, surely, he turns back around and when I catch that first glimpse of his face, I suck in a harsh breath, nearly choking myself. He doesn’t hear it though. Actually, he looks happy. Like, really tremendously happy.
It’s Gabe. Freaking Gabe. My Gabe. My beautiful, sexy, gorgeous, impossible Gabe.
I methodically load my iPad into my backpack, zip it up and hustle my ass out of there as fast as I can.
Lucy rises from her seat, slings her backpack over her shoulder and exits the room like the hounds of hell are chasing after her. I watch in a silent stupor, the clang of the door slamming behind her startling me, surprising the entire classroom and Professor Bailey glares at Lucy’s abandoned seat.
“Perhaps she’s decided she’s not prepared to take my course after all,” he says haughtily, sounding like a complete asshole. Everyone laughs in response, some of them uncomfortably and I decide in that instant I’m getting the hell out.
Leaping into action, I grab my backpack and follow after Lucy, quietly moving by everyone in my row, ignoring the girl who whispers, “You should call me,” as I pass by her. Have I met her before? Probably. Possibly banged her? That’s probable too. Not that I care about that girl, or the professor, or anyone else sitting in that room.
I only care about finding Lucy.
I exit the classroom, making sure the door shuts quietly behind me because I have to go back to that class, I don’t have a choice and I don’t feel like pissing off the professor on the first day. Bad enough that I bailed out but it’s not like I had much choice.
The hallway is empty and I look left, then right, deciding to go left since that’s the way the majority of people enter the building in the first place. Pushing open the double doors, the bright sunlight casts a harsh glare in my face and I shield my eyes as I make my way outside.
There are people everywhere. First day of school and everyone’s gung ho and ready to show up, pretend they’re going to stay on top of things this semester. Eventually as time goes on, the crowds will thin out and everything will return to normal but for now, it’s a giant cluster fuck out here.
And that giant cluster fuck of people is making it impossible for me to find Lucy.
I start to jog down the path that leads back to the campus square, hoping like hell it’s the direction she’s taken. I keep scanning the crowds, looking for a glimpse of her, my heart racing with a mixture of panic and fear as I realize I can’t find her.
Was it her I saw in the yellow dress last night at the bar? I’d been so sure of it but then told myself I’d find her in everything if I looked close enough. Just because I missed her doesn’t mean she’s around here. She could be long gone for all I know. She should be long gone.
This was my rationale last night when I was lying in bed and couldn’t sleep.
The fucking crazy thing is she’s really here. I stared right at her while we were in class. She looked so adorable, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment when everyone turned to stare at her. I have no idea what she did to bring so much attention to herself. All I know is I was so shocked to see her sitting there I wondered for a minute if I was hallucinating. When she turned to look at me, I looked away like some sort of idiot teenager who just got caught drooling over his first crush.
That’s when I caught her watching me in return. And the look on her face when she realized it was actually me…she didn’t look that pleased. No, more like she was completely freaked out right before she got up and bolted out of the room.
Why the hell would she react like that? We ended everything on good terms—at least I thought we did. Hell, I could hardly let her go the morning we left for the airport. She’d held me close and kissed me so hard I could feel the imprint of her lips on mine the rest of the day. I didn’t take a shower that morning because I wanted to smell her on my skin.
Sounds disgusting but damn it, she smells so fucking good. I was in deep mourning when I finally had to take that shower and rid myself of her scent once and for all. I sound like a crazy man. Even in my thoughts, I sound insane. I’ve lost my damn mind.
All over a girl—a girl who now acts like she wants nothing to do with me.
I’d planned on coming to Santa Barbara and picking up my car before I headed back to Santa Augustina for school and I mentioned that I was stopping by. When we were first texting after I left, I asked if she wanted to get together when I returned but she said she wouldn’t be there. And she hadn’t lied about that. When I flew back to Santa Barbara and picked up my car in the long-term parking lot, I’d driven out to her house, but it was empty.
I wrote her off. Told myself to remember her fondly like the summer fling that she was. Didn’t really work but I did try my best. And now she’s here. That first moment of seeing her, realizing that it was really her, in the flesh, sitting mere feet away from me, the excitement, that pure rush of relief at seeing her, had rendered me stupid.
I thought she’d be glad to see me but that wasn’t the case. Worse? My heart cracked when she ran. Like, splintered right down the middle.
She ran like she saw a ghost. Or her worst enemy.
Fucking sucked. Bad.
“Gabe.” The singsong voice is coming at me straight out of my nightmares. Swear to God she’s stalking me.
I turn to give her a strained smile. She is the last person I want to see. “Hey, Audrey.”
“Fancy meeting you here.” She cocks her hip and rests her hand on it, trying her best to look cute. Coy. And I’ll give it to her. She looks pretty damn good, wearing extremely short shorts and an extremely tight shirt. But I’m not interested. She does nothing for me. I look at her and it’s like I’m looking at a dude.
Well. A dude with long blonde hair and his tits in my face. Meaning she’s not like a dude at all.
I need to get the hell out of here stat. “Listen, I gotta—”
“Want to come to a party tonight? It’s at my house.” She smiles prettily, her eyes wide and full of hope.
I slowly shake my head. I’m ge
tting together with Shep and Tristan this evening along with our small staff to go over the grand reopening of the gambling house. “Sorry, I’ve got plans.”
She purses her lips into a mock pout. “Aw, that’s too bad. I really wanted you to come. I’d love to spend time with you, considering we’re here together and all.”
“Maybe some other time,” I say, not wanting to be rude. But not really wanting to encourage her either.
“Yeah?” She brightens. “That would be great. Maybe we can go out this weekend. What do you think?”
“I have plans this weekend too.” I don’t have to bother with an excuse. My plans are for real. The first weekend we’re open when school is back in session is always insane. I’ll be at the house the entire time, supervising everything.
Audrey’s face falls and I swear I catch a flash of anger in her eyes. “Sounds like you’re trying to avoid me.”
Nothing like getting right to the point—she’s got balls, I’ll give it to her. “I’m serious. I have plans. It has nothing to do with avoiding you or not.” I’m not about to divulge what my plans are either. In fact, I never considered this before. Audrey finding out I’m running a gambling business in my house is bad. She could run right to my parents and tell them what I’m doing.
Or use that information against me as blackmail.
A sigh escapes her. “Whatever. You should remember that our moms think we make a perfect match. I happen to agree with them. Don’t you want to make them happy?”
I couldn’t give a shit about either of them at this particular moment but I’m not about to tell Audrey that. And she really believes we make a perfect match? I think that’s stretching it. “Do you really believe we’re compatible?”
Her mouth drops open and she feigns shock. “You don’t think so?”
I don’t feel like being mean but she’s not making this too easy. “Listen, I didn’t really feel a connection with you over the summer, and I know you felt the same way. And besides…I met someone, okay? Someone who means a lot to me and I don’t want to lead you on.”