The Story of a Doctor's Telephone—Told by His Wife
CHAPTER V.
Once in a while sympathy for a fellow mortal kept the doctor's wife aninterested listener at the 'phone. Going, one morning, to speak to afriend about some little matter she heard her husband say:
"What is it, doctor?" A physician in a little town some ten or twelvemiles distant, who had called Dr. Blank in consultation a few daysbefore, was calling him.
"I think our patient is doing very well, but her heart keeps getting alittle faster."
"How fast is it now?"
"About 120."
"But the disease is pretty well advanced now--that doesn't mean as muchas it would earlier. But you might push a little on the brandy, or thestrychnine--how much brandy have you given her since I saw her?"
"I have given her four ounces."
"Four ounces!"
"Yes."
"Four ounces in three days? I think you must mean four drachms."
"_Yes._ It _is_ drachms. Four ounces _would_ be fixing things up. I'vebeen giving her digitalis; what do you think about that?"
"That's all right, but I think that strychnine would be a littlebetter."
"Would you give her any aromatic spirits of ammonia?"
"Does she rattle?"
"A little."
"Then you might give her a little of that. And keep the room open andstick right to her and she ought to get along. Don't give her much toeat."
"Is milk all right?"
"Yes. You bet it is."
"All right then, doctor, I believe that's all. Good-bye."
On another occasion, Mary caught this fragment:
"She's so everlastin' sore that she just hollers and yells every time Igo near her. Would you give her any more morphine?"
"Morphine's a thing you can't monkey with you know, Doctor. You want tobe mighty careful about that."
"Yes. I know. How long will that morphine last?"
"That depends on how you use it. It won't last long if you use too muchand neither will she."
"I mean how long will it last in the system?"
"O! Why, three or four hours."
"Well, I think she don't need no more medicine."
Mary smiled at the double negative and when she laughingly spoke of itthat night her husband assured her that that doctor's singleness ofpurpose more than offset his doubleness of negative. That he was a finefellow and a good physician just the same.
* * * * *
One morning in March just as the doctor arose from the breakfast tablehe was called to the 'phone.
"Is this Dr. Blank?"
"Yes."
"Doctor, will it hurt the baby to bathe it every morning? I've beendoing that but some of the folks around here say I oughtn't to do it;they say it isn't good for a baby to bathe it so often."
The doctor answered solemnly, "The baby's fat and healthy isn't it?"
"Yes, sir."
"And pretty?"
"Yes, _sir_."
"Likes to see its mamma?"
"You _know_ it."
"Likes to see its papa?"
"He does that!" said the young mother.
"Then ask me next fall if it will hurt to bathe the baby every morning."
"All right, Doctor," laughed the baby's mamma.
"The fools are not all dead yet," said John, as he took his hat anddeparted. On the step he turned back and put his head in at the door."Keep an ear out, Mary. I'm likely to be away from the office a good bitthis morning."
An hour later a call came. Mary put the ear that was "out" to thereceiver:
"It's on North Adams street."
"All right. I'll be out there after awhile," said her husband's placidvoice.
"Don't wait too long. He may die before you git here."
"No, he won't. I'll be along pretty soon."
"Well, come just as quick as you can."
"All right," and the listener knew that it might be along toward noonbefore he got there.
About eleven o'clock the 'phone rang sharply.
"Is this Dr. Blank's house?"
"Yes."
"Is he there?"
"I saw him pass here about twenty minutes ago. I'm sure he'll be back tothe office in a little bit."
"My land! I've been here three or four times. Looks like I'd ketch him_some_ time."
"You are at the office then? If you will sit down and wait just a littlewhile, he will be in."
"I come six miles to see him. I supposed of course he'd be in _some_time," grumbled the voice (of course a woman's).
"But when he is called to visit a patient he must go, you know,"explained Mary.
"Y-e-s," admitted the voice reluctantly. "Well, I'll wait here a littlewhile longer."
Ten minutes later Mary rang the office. Her husband replied.
"How long have you been back, John?"
"O, five or ten minutes."
"Did you find a woman waiting for you?"
"No."
"Well, I assured her you'd be there in a few minutes and she said she'dwait."
"Do you know who she was?"
"No. Some one from the country. She said she came six miles to see youand she supposed you'd be in your office _some_ time, and that sometimewas mightily emphatic."
"O, yes, I know now. She'll be in again," laughed the doctor and Maryfelt relieved, for in the querulous tones of the disappointed woman shehad read disapproval of the doctor and of herself too, as the partnernot only of his joys and sorrows, but of his laggard gait as well. Thepeople who wait for a doctor are not apt to consider that a good manymore may be waiting for him also at that particular moment of time.