Shift

  Dallas didn’t even glance at her. I got the feeling that a meteorite could’ve crashed through the ceiling right then and he still would’ve kept gazing at Miranda.

  ‘Who are you?’ he said. ‘I’m sure I know you from somewhere.’

  She laughed. ‘I’m just Miranda.’ Her arm slipped around my waist. ‘And this is my friend Olive.’

  I tensed up. Friend? Since when?

  ‘Well, I’m Dallas,’ said Dallas. As if we wouldn’t know that. ‘And I’m really pleased to meet you.’ His voice was so soft and intimate as he gazed at Miranda that I felt wrong standing near them.

  Next Dallas gave Vincent a slap on the back that almost sent him sprawling. ‘This is Vinnie. Our wunderkind and band mascot.’ Then he swung his other arm around Lachlan’s neck and mussed his hair. ‘And this good-looking guy is my baby brother, Lachie,’ he said. ‘He’s the reason we’re here tonight. The clever little monkey set it all up. Even did the posters.’ He chuckled. ‘I thought there must be some little indie girl he was trying to impress. But then he turns up on his own.’

  ‘Dal,’ muttered Lachlan, unpeeling Dallas’s arm. ‘We know each other. We’re at the same school.’

  Dallas looked delighted. ‘Is that right?’ he said, shaking his head and looking at us. ‘Have you noticed how hard it is to get information out of this guy? I bet you didn’t know he wrote some of our songs.’

  ‘No,’ I said slowly. ‘I didn’t know that.’

  Dallas whisked Miranda away to one side, leaving me and Lachlan standing together. Uncomfortable? Yeah, just a bit. Vincent stood nearby, looking like he might die from the awkwardness of this situation – and he didn’t even know what was going on. Lachlan wedged his hands into his back pockets and shifted his weight from one leg to the other. I suddenly couldn’t stand it any longer.

  ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’

  ‘Tell you what?’ said Lachlan.

  ‘Oh, I don’t know,’ I said. I think my voice might have jumped up an octave. ‘Maybe just a little bit about who you really are.’

  The bar girl came past, stacking glasses.

  ‘You already seemed pretty sure of that,’ Lachlan said. ‘I’m the sporty lifesaver guy.’

  ‘You could’ve corrected me!’ I exploded.

  The bar girl stopped, gathering up the empties on the table near us. The glasses clinked as they joined the stack.

  ‘Would you have listened?’ asked Lachlan quietly.

  ‘Of course!’

  Vincent coughed nervously. ‘OK, it’s time for me to go.’

  ‘Tell you what,’ said Lachlan, as Vincent disappeared. ‘Ask me something now. Whatever you like.’

  I examined his face. Was he teasing me? ‘All right then,’ I said, folding my arms. ‘If Dallas is your brother, why do you have different last names?’

  ‘He’s my half-brother,’ said Lachlan. ‘Same dad, different mums. He uses his mum’s last name.’

  ‘You seem pretty close. For half-brothers.’

  Lachlan nodded. ‘Our dad did a lot of stuff with both of us when we were growing up. Took us on camping trips, hikes, that sort of thing. I thought Dal was just the best thing ever when I was a kid. We catch up when we can. It’s been tricky since Mum and I moved out here.’ He looked at me, smiling just a little. ‘How am I going so far?’

  ‘Not bad,’ I said, trying not to let on how much I was enjoying just talking to him. I’d missed it. ‘Next question. Do you really write songs for Luxe?’

  ‘Dallas was exaggerating,’ Lachlan said, embarrassed. ‘There’s only one thing I’ve written for them that they actually perform.’

  ‘What’s that?’ I think I was holding my breath, waiting to hear what he’d say.

  ‘“Steeple Chaser”.’

  I found myself watching the bar girl working her way around the room. Her glass stack was so tall now that it swayed like a reed over her shoulder.

  ‘Did you arrange this gig?’ I asked.

  ‘If by “arranged” you mean “went in and asked” then yeah, I guess so. Maybe I should ask for a cut of the takings.’ He grinned and took a swig of his drink. ‘Anything else?’

  Yeah, I thought. Did you organise the gig to impress some girl, like Dallas said? And if so, which girl? But I couldn’t quite convince the words to come out.

  Miranda’s laughter – bright and high – made us both turn. She was leaning against the wall, her head tilted back and her long, white throat exposed. Dallas’s hand was resting just beside her on the wall.

  ‘That must be … bothering you,’ said Lachlan uncomfortably.

  ‘It’s not,’ I said quickly. ‘Not one bit.’

  ‘Really?’ said Lachlan, and for a moment his face had this look – all shiny and hopeful. And for a moment it seemed possible that I could reach out and take his hand. Say to him, ‘I’ve been so dumb.’ And that he might nod and smile and say, ‘Yeah, but I still like you.’ And that everything might be OK. Better than OK. Everything might be little-twinkling-stars sublime.

  But instead I blurted something stupid. ‘Why didn’t you tell me Dallas was your brother?’

  Lachlan’s face crunched in. ‘So I could introduce you to him? Sorry, Olive. I guess I’m just not that self-sacrificing.’

  ‘I didn’t mean it like that,’ I said. You wonk, Olive. Wonk, wonk, wonk.

  ‘Don’t worry,’ said Lachlan, his voice all dry and horrible. ‘Believe me, I’m used to it – Dallas has always been the big hot star. It’s never been an issue because generally the girls who fall for him aren’t –’ He stopped.

  ‘What?’ I said.

  Lachlan rubbed his hand slowly down his face. When he’d finished the anger was wiped away. Now he just looked sad. ‘They’ve never been you before.’

  I was suddenly only capable of starting sentences, not finishing them. ‘But I – what I really –’

  ‘It’s OK,’ said Lachlan grimly. ‘I haven’t forgotten what you said at the formal. You were right, we don’t match. So don’t worry. I’m not going to hassle you.’

  Someone had opened a window and a waft of sea air blew through the room, heavy with salt. Lachlan breathed in deeply and his unhappy look faded a little. ‘Feel like going for a swim?’ he said suddenly.

  ‘Who? Me?’ I said, dizzy with how quickly the conversation had changed direction. ‘Now?’

  ‘Yeah,’ said Lachlan. ‘Why not?’

  ‘Because it’s night-time,’ I said quickly. ‘And freezing. And we don’t have towels or bathers.’

  Lachlan tilted his head, looking at me intently. ‘When did you start hating the ocean so much?’

  ‘Let’s just say the sea and I had a falling out,’ I said eventually, trying to sound jokey while fighting to keep my breathing under control. It was still so hard to believe that Lachlan didn’t know what I’d done. What I’d attempted to do. But if he really didn’t, there was no way I was about to fill him in here, standing in the Rainbow.

  Lachlan kept watching me with those steady brown eyes. ‘You don’t have to tell me,’ he said. He didn’t sound angry. Maybe just a little disappointed.

  Vincent reappeared, eyeing us warily. ‘Lachlan, if you want a lift back with Pearl you have to come now,’ he said. ‘She’s parked in a loading zone and she’s not paying for another …’ he coughed, ‘… effing ticket.’

  Lachlan put down his glass. Zipped up his jacket. Even from where I was standing I could still smell him – a salty, warm-bread smell. ‘Want a lift somewhere?’

  ‘Um, no,’ I said, when really I meant yes. ‘I’m fine.’

  Lachlan nodded. Like he was expecting that response. ‘See you around then,’ he said.

  ‘Sure.’

  Stop, I found myself willing him. Turn around. And just near the door, he did stop and turn. ‘Hey,’ he said. ‘If you ever want to start over again, let me know.’

  I gulped.

  ‘With the ocean, I mean,’ he said. ‘Maybe I can help you patch things up.’
br />   ‘Oh,’ I squeaked. ‘Yeah. I’ll let you know.’

  I waited, a goofy smile frozen on my face until he had disappeared, and then I fled outside and cooled my face against the flaky wall of the Rainbow. Maybe if I pressed hard enough I could sink into the bricks and disappear completely.

  The door swung open and Miranda came out, her cheeks flushed. ‘Hey, I’m sorry,’ she said, coming over to me.

  ‘Huh?’

  ‘That you got stuck with Dallas’s brother,’ she said, shaking her head sympathetically. ‘But I’ve been raving to Dallas about you. He’s really interested, I can tell.’

  I gave a short laugh. ‘Somehow I don’t think it’s me he’s interested in.’ Tiredness was making me slump. ‘Hey look. I’m going home,’ I said.

  ‘Oh no,’ pouted Miranda. ‘Not yet. Dallas will be devastated.’

  ‘I think he’ll cope.’

  Miranda flung her arms around me, hugging me tightly. I don’t know what I thought it would feel like to be hugged by her. Spiky maybe. Or cold. But the hug felt good – warm and friendly. When she pulled back, her eyes were sparkling mischievously.

  ‘Sorry,’ she said. ‘I know that probably spun you out. But I’m just so glad you came tonight. It … well, it means a lot to me.’ She looked at me almost shyly then. ‘See you at school tomorrow?’

  I nodded, surprised at how natural this felt. ‘Yeah. See you then.’

  Later, when I was home in bed, I put my earphones in and played ‘Steeple Chaser’ on repeat. It sounded different now. Maybe because for the first time it wasn’t Dallas’s face I pictured as I drifted off to sleep.

  By the time Miranda appeared at school the next morning I’d almost given up on her coming at all. And the strangest thing was that I’d felt disappointed.

  She grabbed my hands, her eyes bright. ‘I have to talk with you,’ she said. ‘Now.’

  ‘Sure,’ I said. ‘Go ahead.’

  Miranda looked around with distaste. ‘Not here. Let’s ditch today.’

  I hesitated. ‘Well …’

  ‘Oh come on,’ pleaded Miranda. ‘Just for an hour. Seriously, I will bust if I don’t talk to you.’

  ‘Just one hour then,’ I said. That wasn’t breaking a promise exactly. Just bending it a bit. It didn’t matter if I missed PE anyway – it wasn’t like I’d be joining in.

  When I used to drop school in the old days I would wait until no-one was around and then slink out as quickly as I could. But Miranda just strode along like she had every right to be heading in the complete opposite direction to our home room. I trotted along beside her, fully expecting someone to jump out at any minute and ask what the hell we were up to. No-one did. We walked straight out of the front gate – past Mrs Deane’s office – and down the street.

  Around the corner from school Miranda stopped. ‘I have something to tell you,’ she said, chewing her lip. ‘Something really bad. And I can’t go any further until I get it off my chest.’

  ‘What is it?’ Crazy things had begun jumping into my mind. Things that would’ve set Dr Richter’s pen clicking. She’s going to tell you she is a shifter. And that you’re her next victim.

  ‘It’s about Dallas,’ said Miranda. ‘Last night after you went, he asked me out.’ She clenched her hands and pushed them together, her forehead creased. ‘You hate me now, don’t you? You’d just started not hating me and now you hate me all over again.’ She sighed. ‘I don’t blame you. It must feel awful to have the guy you like ask someone else out. Especially when it’s a guy like Dallas.’

  I laughed with relief. ‘It’s not your fault that Dallas likes you,’ I said. ‘It’d be pretty pathetic if I got upset about that.’

  The look on Miranda’s face was hard to decode. She looked surprised, but there was something else in there. It almost looked like she was annoyed. ‘Yes,’ she said slowly. ‘That would be pretty tragic, I guess.’

  ‘So,’ I said. ‘How do you feel about him?’

  Miranda closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around herself, swaying from side to side. ‘Dallas,’ she sang. ‘Dallas, Dallas, Dallas, Dallas.’

  ‘You like him that much already?’ I teased.

  ‘You know that feeling when you really connect with a guy?’ said Miranda. ‘When he just completely gets you, even though you’ve barely said a word to each other?’

  I thought of Lachlan. How surprising it was that he seemed to see and understand so much about me. How easy it was just to talk with him. ‘Totally,’ I said.

  ‘Well that’s how it feels with Dallas,’ said Miranda. ‘I mean, I only met him last night and it already feels like we’ve known each other all our lives.’

  ‘So when are you going out?’ I asked.

  Miranda sparkled. ‘Tonight!’

  ‘Wow!’ I said. ‘So soon.’

  I don’t know why I was surprised. That was how it worked – for people like Miranda and Dallas. They met, they liked each other, they arranged to go out. Simple. I, on the other hand, had managed to convince the guy I was crushing on that I didn’t care for him at all. Nice one, me.

  Miranda eyed me warily. ‘So you’re not pissed off?’

  ‘No.’ I said. ‘I’m happy for you.’

  Miranda grabbed my hands and danced me around. ‘That’s so great! Hey, let’s go shopping. I want to find something new to wear for tonight.’

  ‘You won’t find anything around here,’ I said. ‘Unless you want to wear a nice new tracksuit.’

  Miranda flicked her hand. ‘I don’t want to look around here,’ she said. ‘Let’s go into town.’

  ‘Now?’

  ‘Of course now.’

  The idea of some mindless shopping in town was weirdly appealing. Maybe because it was something I hadn’t done in ages, not since I was friends with Katie.

  Miranda must have seen me hesitating. ‘It’s just one morning,’ she urged. ‘We’ll be back this afternoon.’

  ‘All right,’ I said. One morning wasn’t so bad. ‘Train or bus?’

  Miranda released her hair from its ponytail. It looked darker, like the colour she’d been using while she was friends with Katie had begun to fade and now her natural colour was returning. It was funny though. I couldn’t quite remember what her natural colour had been.

  ‘Neither,’ she said. ‘Let’s drive.’

  I laughed. ‘Do you have a chauffeur, then?’

  ‘I can drive,’ said Miranda, without a trace of a smile. Then she gestured to the cars lining the street. ‘Pick one,’ she said. ‘I can get it open in about fifteen seconds.’

  ‘But the city is so crap for parking,’ I said. Just play along. Don’t look like a wonk. ‘Let’s get the train today.’

  Miranda shrugged. ‘Sure.’

  Usually the train ride into town was pretty dull – travelling through endless bland suburbs and industrial estates. But that morning I enjoyed it. We talked a bit about the Luxe gig – Miranda loved their music as much as I did – and then we talked about bands in general. Miranda had been to heaps of festivals while she was living in Europe, the same ones that I could only read about online and daydream about attending. I was almost disappointed when we arrived in town.

  ‘Where do you want to go?’ I asked as we got off at Central. The last few suits were marching off the train and heading into coffee shops on their way to work.

  Miranda looked around, her eyes kind of misty. ‘It’s weird to be here without Katie,’ she said. ‘Last time we were –’ She stopped, cleared her throat. ‘You know what? Let’s follow someone.’

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘That’s the way I find stuff,’ said Miranda. ‘I just look around for someone interesting and then I follow them.’

  ‘Well … OK then.’ It seemed like a pretty weird way to shop, but this was Miranda’s expedition.

  We hung around the train station waiting for someone interesting to come by. For a while it felt like no-one would measure up. We’d been there for almost an hour, drinki
ng hot chocolates and people-watching, when a woman with dark hair intricately twirled up on her head came past. She was wearing large sunglasses and her high-heeled boots clacked loudly on the concrete steps.

  ‘Her,’ said Miranda decisively. And we were off.

  We followed the woman for several blocks, loitering outside a café when she stopped to pick up a coffee and pretending to examine the window display of a chemist when she went to the bank. Frankly, I thought Miranda had made a bad choice. The woman seemed kind of dull. But then she turned off the main street and into an alley, making a series of quick left and right turns until we found ourselves in a crowded laneway. Cameras flashed. At the end of the street was a building covered with thousands of silver balloons. The woman strode through the crowd and showed something to the security guard out the front of the building. Some sort of pass. The guard nodded and held open the door for her. The door handle was in the shape of a bird, swooping upwards.

  ‘Interesting,’ said Miranda. ‘They must be opening a branch of Silver here today.’

  I looked around. ‘How do you know what it’s called?’ I couldn’t see a shop name anywhere.

  Miranda grinned. ‘I just know,’ she said. ‘Let’s go in. They have good stuff. You’ll like it. And their opening parties are a-mazing.’

  I hung back. ‘We haven’t been invited,’ I said. ‘And we’re in school uniform.’

  ‘Just relax,’ said Miranda, tucking her arm through mine. ‘It’ll be fine. Or do you want to go back to school? You could be back in time for chemistry if you hurry.’

  I laughed. ‘No thanks.’ I was a bit nervous about crashing this fancy-looking party but I didn’t want to leave either. I was having fun. Real fun. For the first time in ages.

  As we approached the door the security guard clicked his finger at Miranda and grinned. ‘Don’t tell me. You must be Isabel’s sister,’ he said. ‘Right?’

  Miranda smiled, and shook her hair. ‘We do look kind of the same, don’t we?’ she said sweetly. ‘Is she around? She forgot to give me our passes.’

  The guard almost tripped over himself in his hurry to open the door for us. ‘Just go in,’ he said. ‘Say hi to her from me, OK?’ Miranda stepped through, taking a firm hold of my hand like she thought I might make a break for it. ‘Will do!’ she chirruped.