Home Is Where the Heart Break Is

  He lifted his face and looked toward the ceiling. “Listen. The rain has slowed. I’ve got a flashlight and a pair of jeans in the truck. I’ll go get them.”

  I followed right behind him as if I was attached to a short tether. I stayed on the porch as he ran to the truck. Rain water dripped from the overhang and small gusts of wind still shot through the trees, but the thunder and lightning had moved farther to the east.

  Nico turned on the flashlight and came across the front yard with a pair of pants on his arm. We walked back inside and shut the door. Even though the worst of the storm had passed, there was still no electricity, and the temperature inside the cabin was dropping fast.

  “I wonder how long it will take them to get the power back on,” I said.

  “They work on the areas with the densest populations first.” He looked down at me. “I think King’s Road will be last on their list.”

  “So I guess we’ll have to cuddle under a blanket on the couch in the dark,” I said.

  “Sounds rough, but it looks that way.”

  I took hold of the flashlight. “I’ll lead you to the bathroom so you can change.”

  We got down the hall, and I looked longingly at the light in my hand.

  “Keep it,” he said, “I can change in the dark.”

  “I’ll get the blanket from my bed.” I followed the yellow stream of light airily into my room to grab my quilt as if the night had gone along swimmingly and I had not just spent the last half hour paralyzed in fright.

  Nico and I met in the hallway. He’d changed into jeans but his chest was bare. I used the flashlight like a spotlight and shined it at his great physique.

  “I’ve got to say, you’ve filled out astonishingly well, my friend,” I said.

  Without warning he grabbed my arms and pulled me against him. The flashlight dropped to the ground and rolled against the wall, lighting the small hallway with a warm yellow glow. The blanket puddled around our feet. The storm outside had quieted, and the only sound in the powerless cabin was the sound of our breathing.

  He gazed down at me. “Funny, I was thinking the same thing about you, my friend.” He circled his arms around my back and pulled me even closer. I could feel the coolness of his skin through my shirt. Then his mouth came down hard over mind and he kissed me long and deep. My hands reached up behind his head, and I held him tightly not wanting the kiss to end. Suddenly the lights popped back on, the refrigerator whirred again, and the heater fired up.

  I smiled up at Nico, who peered down at me through his dark lashes. “Of course, now they come back on,” I said.

  He bent down and picked up the blanket and flashlight. “That can easily be resolved.” We walked out to the couch, and he reached up with his elbow and flicked off the light switch as we passed it.

  Nico drew the blanket around us as we sat down. He kissed me again, and I pressed tightly against him, reveling in the heat between us.

  “I guess you found the right moment for the kiss right over there in the dark hallway.” I pressed my lips against the skin of his shoulder. He tasted clean and fresh like rainwater.

  “I don’t know if it was the right time or not, but I couldn’t wait any longer. It’s all I’ve been thinking about, and tonight, after you threw yourself into my arms, my willpower shattered and I knew I had to kiss you.”

  “Thank goodness because if you hadn’t kissed me soon I was going to have to take matters into my own hands.”

  A cocky grin appeared. “Well, don’t let me stop you.”

  I climbed into his lap and wrapped my arms around his neck. It seemed now that we’d started kissing it was going to be impossible to stop.

  The sound of a throat clearing woke me. Sleep cleared from my head and I lowered the cover from my head. “Mom?”

  Nico moaned in his sleep as he stretched out the arm that I’d been sleeping on.

  The yellow beam of the flashlight highlighted our faces and Nico opened his heavy lids. Forgetting that I was sitting in his lap, he jumped up from the couch and dumped me on the ground in front of his feet. “Oh crap, Jessa, I’m sorry.” He gave me his hand and pulled me to my feet. Mom dragged the light of the flashlight over his bare chest. Even in the dim light I could see her brow crease in annoyance. “I guess I should be glad that he has his pants on,” she said derisively.

  “The lights had gone out so Nico knew I’d be afraid but he was wet--”

  While I rambled, Mom sauntered over to the light switch and flicked it on. “I guess the power is back on now.” She looked over at Nico. “It’s late. You should probably head home.”

  He scrubbed his hair with his fingers and searched quickly for his shoes. He grabbed them but didn’t stop to put them on. He was upset and I was angry at my mom for making him feel so uncomfortable.

  “See you later, Jessa.” He turned to my mom and nodded then raced out the door.

  “Mom, he came tonight because he knew I would be scared. Why did you do that?” I wasn’t about to let him leave without thanking him. I shoved my feet into my fuzzy slippers and raced out the door.

  Nico had just reached his truck.

  “Nico.” I trudged across the muddy yard nearly losing my slippers in my trek. I hopped up on my fuzzy toes, threw my arms around his neck, and kissed him. Then I dropped back down. The look of anguish in his face made nearly broke my heart. “Don’t worry. She’s not really mad. She just likes to act like a mom occasionally.” I ran back to the house.

  I left giant fuzzy slipper mud tracks all the way across the floor then closed my door sharply only to remember that my quilt was on the couch. Mom stood in the kitchen drinking a glass of milk and silently watching my angry march back to my blanket and back to my room. I heard her laugh as I shut the door.

  Chapter 14

  Mom had given me the cold shoulder most of the morning and had even threatened to ground me which I knew she wouldn’t go through with because she never had before. Plus she’d made the idle threat while holding back a grin.

  I decided to stick around the shop and have lunch with Mom and Sadie instead of inflating the couch scene by heading to the marina for lunch. The only problem was that Nico was certain the cancelled lunch meant Mom hated him and that he was going to be banned from my house forever.

  Aunt Sadie had asked me to broom the sidewalk in front of the shop. I used it as an opportunity to talk to him privately or at least out of earshot of Mom and Sadie.

  “Hey, Duchess,” he answered sulkily.

  “I can tell you’re pouting just by the sound of your voice.”

  “I’ll just live with the reality that your mom hates me.”

  Nico’d had such an awful family life, he grew up believing that adults didn’t trust him. Truthfully, even the teachers at school never gave him much of a break. But the principal, Mrs. Carlton, treated him compassionately because she knew about his home life, mostly because my mom had taken the time to go in and talk to her about it. Mrs. Carlton had even made several attempts to turn Nico’s father in to social services, but it never seemed to go anywhere. I know they came out to talk to his father once because Nico had shown up the next morning looking pale and strained. I’m certain social services saw the luxurious house he lived in and decided nothing bad could be happening inside such an expensive home.

  “She was angrier at me for tracking mud through the house.”

  There was a long pause then Nico spoke again. “Jessa, she wouldn’t forbid you from seeing me, would she?” He sounded so upset I regretted cancelling lunch with him.

  “You know my mom isn’t like that. I promise you she’s not that upset. I just thought I’d stick around and eat lunch with her. That’s all. Nothing is going to keep me away from you, Nico. You’re stuck with me.”

  There was a long a pause. “Sometimes I can’t even believ
e you’re back in my life, Duchess. Yesterday I woke up and wondered if was just dreaming it.”

  “Well if it is a dream that worries me, because I woke up with swollen lips this morning.”

  He laughed. “I’ve got to get back to work. I guess we’ll go tubing tonight if you still want to go.”

  “I do. I’ll text Chase to let him know we’re going. See you later.”

  ***

  Highlanders were lined up around the corner to get a free river ride. “I didn’t realize there were so many kids living up here,” I said as we stepped into line. Strangely, it seemed every head in line turned back to look at us. I leaned closer to Nico. “Why do I feel like everyone’s watching us?”

  Nico shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s just a stupid ass town. Vanessa told me we are the topic of the day in Pinecliff.”

  “We’re a topic? Hmm, I’ve never been a topic before.” Some kids were super obvious, and they would just turn around and stare blankly. Others would sneak clandestine glances over their shoulders. “I don’t think I like being a topic.”

  Nico threw his arm around my shoulder and dragged me close to him. “Screw ‘em.”

  “Jessa!” Chase called from the back of line where at least twenty more people had filled in behind us.

  I leaned out and waved back. “Hey guys.” There was no return wave from Susie. “Why don’t you come up here with us?” I yelled back to them. Chase said something to Susie but she shook her head.

  Chase waved back dejectedly. “No thanks.”

  “Who do you think she’s trying to avoid the most-- me or you?” I asked Nico.

  He glanced back at Chase and Susie then smiled down at me. “I know she hates my guts, but I’m pretty sure it’s you, Duchess.”

  “But why? I never did anything to her.” I sighed.

  “Growing up, our circle was pretty impenetrable. I think that has stuck with her.”

  “I think she’s making a mistake. Chase brought me a pastry yesterday morning, and we sat down in front of the shop and talked. He was really looking forward to hanging out with us on this river trip. He likes Susie a lot but I think if she doesn’t lighten the reins, she’s going to push him away.”

  “Totally agree with you there.”

  Like a bunch of black rubber Cheerios floating on blue milk the inner tubes covered surface of the water. Laughter, loud talking, and music rolled up from the banks of the river. The previous night’s storm had left an extra clear sky and a slightly more rambunctious current.

  I took hold of Nico’s hand. “I haven’t gone tubing for a long time so stay close to me.”

  He squeezed my hand. “If I must.”

  We were a few people from the front of the line when Vanessa stepped out of nowhere to greet us. A grin nearly split her face in half. “I’m so glad you guys decided to come.” She motioned to the tall, thin guy handing out inner tubes. Her eyes twinkled at me. “Do you remember my brother, David?”

  I took a closer look. “I do. Wow, he grew up so tall.”

  “Yeah, he’s a real pain, but I love him.”

  I looked past her. “I thought your boyfriend might be with you.” I’d already forgotten his name so I used the generic boyfriend term to not seem completely inconsiderate.

  “Oh yeah, he had to work. It’s a bummer.” She gazed up at Nico and it seemed a smidgen of the childhood crush still lingered. “Nico, your dad wanted me to remind you that the gasoline truck is coming to fill the gas station tanks tomorrow.”

  “Yep, thanks,” Nico said. He was always a bit terse with her, and it bothered me that he didn’t show her a little more kindness. Of course they worked together all day, so maybe there was stuff I didn’t know about.

  “See you on the water.” Vanessa walked back over to her brother. He handed her a tube, and she carried it down to the water and jumped on.

  That was when I saw a tall brunette also hopping on her tube. I’d only seen her once, but I knew it was Regina. Nico saw her too. He watched her for a second then seemed to sense that I was looking at him.

  “What do you want me to say? She works here,” he said.

  “I didn’t say a word.” There was plenty I wanted to say, but I would have felt like a hypocrite after my philosophizing about Susie and her relentless control of Chase. After all, if Nico preferred Regina then I would just accept it and go back home with my heart in a million pieces.

  Vanessa’s brother handed me a tube with a giant red patch on it. Nico followed with his down to the water.

  “How come mine looks like it has been around the block, or I should say the rapids, a few times.” I pointed to the red patch.

  “They test them every morning. Mine has a patch too but it’s black so it’s not as noticeable.” He lifted the tube to prove his point.

  We walked to the river’s edge and dropped in the tubes. Mine seemed stable enough. I climbed on, and we pushed off into the current and into the mass of other floaters.

  My mood had soured some after catching Nico staring at Regina, but I had to admit that coasting along the crystal clear river, between rows of towering pines and beneath a dark blue sky where the stars were waiting to make their appearance, was extremely cool. The storm churned water made it hard to stay near Nico, and eventually I ended up between two girls who looked somewhat familiar.

  One girl had ginger hair and a pretty spray of freckles across her nose and I remembered her name as soon as she spoke. “Hey, Jessa. It’s so cool that you came back for the summer.”

  “Tanya, I thought that was you. How’s it going?”

  “Great. I’ll be graduating early next year and then I’m going to study abroad in Australia.”

  “That’s awesome. You are so lucky.” I shifted my weight because I felt like I was getting really wet. The skin of my legs squeaked along the rubber, and I could swear my butt grazed a submerged rock.

  Tanya squinted ahead to a clump of tubes in front of us. “Everyone was wondering if you and Nico would become an instant item. Is Chase here too?”

  I decided to ignore the comment about Nico and me. I pointed behind. “Chase and Susie are back there somewhere.”

  “Most people thought they would be finished after junior year and then when rumors swirled that you were coming back that sort of cemented the idea, but I guess he’s going to stick it out. Anyhow, I think everyone knew you were meant for Nico.”

  My mouth was hanging open and I knew it, but I could hardly bring myself to close it. This town really needed to get a life. I was glad when another tube came between us and the current steered me away from Tanya. I was beginning to feel like tabloid fodder.

  The sun was disappearing behind the tall ridge of the mountains, and the sky muted into a charcoal gray color. I rested my head back and closed my eyes to enjoy the movement of the river.

  “Duchess,” Nico called from somewhere in the collection of inner tubes. He lifted up his arm and waved. He was stuck in the center. This time I was moving ahead of him. As I passed by, a girl on one of the tubes near him turned around to look at me. It was Regina with an unpleasant expression.

  As the bottom of the river became rockier, the current picked up, and I twirled around involuntarily. I was suddenly anxious to get to the end of the trip. And to think I’d been looking forward to it. On top of it all, I seemed to be getting much wetter than everyone else. I pushed on the rubber beneath my arm. It was soft. My tube was leaking and I was sinking. I glanced back to see how far Nico was from me and he seemed to sense I was in trouble. I saw him push up from his tube and our eyes met. He started paddling with his arms, but I could swear Regina was purposely blocking him from moving toward me.

  I shifted my weight. The air in the half-filled tube shifted to one side and I capsized. The shock of the water stunned me at first, and I kicked my legs as I struggled to hang on to my collapsing tube. A
few people giggled under their hands as they passed, but no one stopped to help. Then my shin struck the sharp edge of a submerged rock and agonizing pain shot through me. I felt the warm trickle of blood mix with the cold river water.

  I could barely hold on as the current moved even faster. Finally someone seemed to notice that I was struggling. The boy leaned over his tube and tried to get hold of my arm as he passed by, but the water was moving too fast. The searing pain in my leg was taking its toll on my strength and courage. Hidden giggles were replaced by worried looks as a few more people attempted to grab hold of me but to no avail.

  Then in the shadows of the fading sunlight and tall trees someone was swimming toward me at a pace much faster than the current. Nico dragged his tube behind him making the swim that much more arduous. I let out a whimper of relief as he reached me. He grabbed hold of my waist and hoisted us both back onto his tube. I lay crisscross over him, rested my head against his shoulder, and cried. I was shivering like crazy and my leg throbbed.

  His arms held me tightly against him. “Jessa, you’re bleeding.”

  Through bleary eyes I glanced down at my leg. Blood ran in rivulets from a gash in my shin. I felt dizzy and sick to my stomach. I rested my head against Nico’s shoulder. My hot tears ran down his chest.

  “Hang in there, Duchess. We’re almost to the end. They’ll have trucks there to drive us back to the parking lot.”

  I nodded weakly and tried to bury myself against the warmth of his bare chest but nothing, not even the comfort of Nico’s strong arms would stop the uncontrollable tremble that had taken control of my body.

  When we got near the small rocky strip of sand where the jeeps and buses parked to pick up the riders, Nico yelled to shore. “A little help.”

  Tears had blurred my vision and my head felt heavy and tired, but I could see one of the workers wade into the water to meet us.