Pillowtalk

  He noticed Kennedy bite back a grin at the state of the room. “Looks just like mine,” she said, and Aaron laughed, grateful that she took it all with good humor.

  “They’re clean,” he assured her as he dropped the towel and started sorting through his basket. He had a few shirts that that would most likely cover all of the private areas of her body, though Austin’s wardrobe would be a more appropriate covering. If Aaron was being honest with himself, however, he was looking through his own clothes purely for the selfish reason of seeing her in one of his shirts.

  His plaid overshirt was so wet that it kept dripping into the dry clothes as he searched. Getting frustrated with it, he laughed and wriggled it down his shoulders, the material slopping to the empty basket they kept on top of the washer for dirty clothes. Kennedy’s laughter at his struggle had him playfully glaring over his shoulder at her. Though there was a smile on her face, her gaze distinctly trailed down the length of his back and a stunning blush rose in her cheeks.

  He shook his head, his wet hair spraying his hands as he went back to his search. Damn it, he couldn’t even look at her without his blood rushing under his skin, draining from his head and making reason seem impossible. If she were anyone else, any other woman who happened to be in Lyra Valley at the same time as he, there would be no hesitation. If he’d connected with someone half as beautiful and easy to talk to and interesting and adorable and fun and deep and intoxicating, he’d have her up in his room, helping her out of her wet clothes and into a warm shower. He was half-tempted to do it now, but his better half knew better. She had been Jared’s, and if that weren’t reason enough, he believed that part of her, the most important part, still was Jared’s and always would be.

  His hand clenched around one of his plaid button-ups, knowing the long sleeves and extra fabric would give her the warmth and coverage she would need while her clothes went through the dryer.

  “This should do it,” he said, trying his best not to look directly at her as he handed it over. “I’ll let you change.”

  He wouldn’t allow himself to think she looked disappointed, or that she wanted to say something to the contrary, or that her hand twitched out to him as if she didn’t want him to leave. He couldn’t think those things, and he pushed all that away as he left and took a much-needed breath out in the hallway.

  Was this a test? A second chance to prove that he wasn’t a bad guy? If it was, he’d already failed, and he was doomed to fail even more. Kennedy was more than a pretty face that crossed his path—she had to be the person he was inexplicably drawn to and who had an addicting personality to top it off. She didn’t make him feel like such a bad guy, and was that really so wrong?

  “Ugh,” he groaned to himself, leaning against the wall and sliding down a few inches. He knocked the back of his head against it once, twice, three times, trying—and failing—to rid himself of the image of her stripping out of her wet clothing, running the soft towel over her pale skin, sliding her arms into the sleeves of his shirt. His gaze automatically flicked down the hallway, and his head jerked up as he noticed the laundry door cracked open.

  Turn away, his conscience told him. But the strip of skin he could see just through the crack locked him in, and a rush of warmth ran through his chest and almost had him picking up his feet and closing the gap between them.

  Kennedy stretched up her arms, her smooth, bare back facing him as she wrung out her short hair. The water fell onto her porcelain skin, tracking down over her shoulders and sneaking into the line in the center of her back, soaking into her skin near her hip, where a pair of damp pink panties covered a perfect, heart-shaped bottom. Aaron gulped, blinking through the lust spotting his vision and reaching down to adjust what it had done to him below the belt.

  He blew out a sigh, muttering, “Shit,” under his breath. “Shit, shit, shit.”

  Charlie, who had been lapping at the rainwater pooling around Aaron’s feet, plopped down on his hindquarters obediently, assuming Aaron was ordering him to “sit.” Aaron laughed at the pup, his arousal alleviated for a very brief moment until the sound of the dryer door opening brought his attention back up to Kennedy.

  Her silky-looking legs were crouched in front of the dryer, Aaron’s plaid bunched around her hips as she tossed in her bundle of wet clothing. A spot of pink dropped from her pile onto the tiled floor, and she quickly picked it up, revealing a plush, lacy bra. Aaron’s head fell back to the wall, and he rapped it a few more times, but all it did was give him a headache.

  “Um…Aaron?” she said, and he tried not to look so anxious as he gazed over to her peeking from the cracked door. “Did you want your clothes in here, too, before I start it?”

  His shoes squeaked against the floor as he made his way over to her, his breath locked tight in his chest. He tried his hardest not to be so obvious about it, but he couldn’t help but drop his gaze to the dry, warm plaid hanging limply on her body, the top three buttons left undone and open, giving him enough of a glimpse at her perfectly mounded chest. He gulped back a groan, resisted the urge to grasp her waist and pull her into him.

  She let out a long, raspy breath that broke him out of his haze. He flicked his gaze back up and watched her teeth slowly pull and play with her bottom lip in a way he wanted to try for himself.

  She’d asked him a question. For the life of him, he could not remember what it was.

  There was a six-, seven-second beat before Kennedy reached out, stopped to think about it, and then dedicated herself. Her fingers tucked under the hem of his wet undershirt, grazing his abdominals and leaving a fiery trail in their wake. Aaron held his breath, locking his eyes with hers to be sure it was really happening and not just his overactive imagination. She stepped into him, pushing the material up the muscles he usually hid. When she got to his pounding heart in his chest, he lifted his arms and pulled at the back of his neck to help her get the rest of it off his body.

  They both released a collective breath, as if the simple act had taken everything in them to do. Kennedy dropped the shirt into the dryer behind her, not taking her eyes off Aaron’s bare torso.

  “Tell me what you’re thinking,” she blurted out, slamming her eyes closed and tugging on the bottom of the plaid shirt she was wearing. Aaron’s mind was so far gone that he didn’t hold back the truth, though he probably should have.

  “I’m thinking…that Jared would kill me if he knew what I was thinking.”

  She let out a small laugh, her warm breath hitting the bare skin over his collarbone. With his roundabout admission of how she affected him, he assumed her confidence spiked, and she reached out and ran a tantalizing finger across his abdomen. His blood rushed south, and a few lightbulbs shut off in his overworked mind. He wrapped a hand around her hip, drawing her close enough that her warm, pliant body pressed firmly against his. He felt her supple breasts crush against his chest, her hesitant touch growing more sure as she put a hand on his shoulder and trickled her fingers down over his biceps.

  She shook her head, her hair tickling the scruff on his chin. It put a pause in his next move, and he swallowed hard above her.

  “You okay?”

  Her eyes floated up to his, a shiny wall built up over the deep brown irises. “No,” she said, her honesty lifting the corner of her lip for just a moment. “Are you okay?”

  Aaron leaned back at the unexpected question, not remembering the last time he’d been asked that by a woman. He exhaled against the top of her head, his grip tightening on her soft, warm hip. He’d made countless mistakes in his past, but there was still that giant one that had stayed with him even now, years later. And he knew…he knew right then that he was going to make it again.

  “No.” He pressed his lips together briefly. “No, I’m not okay.”

  Her beautiful eyes filled with unshed tears, and she set a hand on the beating pulse in his neck. The other found the back of his head, her fingers tangling in the wet strands of his hair. She pulled him to her lips, her body sh
ifting upward against him as she pushed up on her toes. It was Aaron who shook his head this time, knowing that going any further would break his control completely.

  “Please?” she whispered, her breath a hot rake over his lips. “Can we…try to make it okay? Just for a little bit?”

  Christ, how was he going to deny her that? How was he going to deny himself? He smoothed a hand along the length of her back and into her hair, swallowing back the guilt that was already starting to invade his thoughts. She wanted him to take away the pain in her heart, to make everything okay for the time she was in his arms. He wanted that from her, too, desperately, but he knew going there would only make things so much worse later.

  But…this wasn’t just about him. If it were, maybe he’d find the strength to push her away, to put up the wall, to keep her at arm’s length. Maybe.

  But with her wanting, needing something from him, he couldn’t say no. The devil on his shoulder danced as he covered her mouth, deepening the kiss almost immediately after their scorching lips touched.

  She moaned into his mouth, melting against his body as if he’d given her the drug she’d needed for an affliction she’d carried for far too long. Her tongue slid frantically against his, causing his grip to tighten, to keep her locked in place so he could taste more, feel more.

  There was a whine near their feet, and while it pained him to do it, he stepped forward, pushing Kennedy farther into the laundry room so he could kick the door closed and give them privacy away from his dog. Her perfect bottom knocked the dryer door shut with a bang, and he felt her lips tilt up in amusement through their passionate kissing. She shivered against him, and he ran his hands down her ribs, over her hips, and tucked them under the firm curve of her ass and hoisted her up on the dryer. With their new position, she cupped his face, played with his hair, trailed her nails over his jawline…Aaron held back a deep moan at the sensations, loving how she appreciated the features of his body, yet feeling guilty that he loved it. He turned his attention to her, his palms running over her thighs and up under the plaid shirt.

  She was completely bare underneath. He knew that, but feeling it under his hands was a whole different ballpark, and his erection strained in his wet clothes as his fingers dug into the soft flesh of her hips. She sucked in a harsh breath when Aaron’s thumb dipped down to her inner thigh.

  “Yes,” she said, their foreheads slick against each other from the rain in their hair and the sweat of their heated passion. “It’s okay, please. Please.”

  Aaron complied, inching his hand up and palming her hot and ready sex. All his trepidation flew out into the storm when he saw her eyes widen and her sexy mouth form into a perfect O at his touch. Her head tossed back, and he painted her lovely exposed neck with wet, openmouthed kisses, slipping a finger inside of her. She was swollen and wet with need, and Aaron blinked at the spots blurring his vision, his own arousal hard and painful now against the zipper of his soaked jeans.

  He grasped at her shirt with his free hand, popping the buttons so that her perfect, round breasts bounced free. He covered one with his lips, his tongue reaching out and flicking at the hardened nub. She jerked and bucked against him, holding on to the back of his head to keep him in place. Heavenly expletives rolled off her tongue in a sweet, sultry symphony that was perfectly in tune with the thunder rolling outside. He moved to the other breast, giving it equal attention as the first, speeding up his pace.

  “I…I need…” she uttered in a pleasured, broken voice. “I need…more. Please.”

  Those “pleases” were his kryptonite, weaving into his ear and crippling his self-control. Aaron withdrew his hand and kissed his way down her soft stomach, pulling open the remaining two buttons on the shirt. He set a palm between her breasts and coaxed her flat across the washer and dryer. Her dilated eyes widened as she realized he was not going to have sex with her in the way she’d thought; he was going to please her and only her. As he’d promised himself before, this wasn’t about him, and he wasn’t going to make it that way. If truth be told, though—and he shoved the thought away before it overtook him—giving Kennedy what she needed was going to give him more than enough pleasure in itself.

  He kissed her inner thigh, grinning against her skin when she twitched under his lips. Her body was tense, timid, and shy over the intimacy of the act, and he smoothed a hand over her knee to let her know that it was okay to trust him.

  Her legs slowly fell open, and Aaron kissed her center softly first, gently easing her into relaxation. She moaned when he bent his head again, sucking her swollen clit into his mouth for the briefest of moments. He had to let out a long, heady breath to get control over himself, to not say “screw it” and find his own release.

  She lifted her hips, silently asking for more. Aaron grinned before going down again, this time with more conviction, running a tongue over her folds. She jerked underneath him, her nails scratching the metal of the dryer as her fists clenched at her sides. He grabbed hold of her thighs and pulled her legs up on his shoulders. She bucked against his mouth, thrusting in tune with his tongue at a frantic pace. Aaron lost himself in the sounds she made, in the way her nails dug into his hair, how sweet she tasted. It wasn’t long before her back arched up off the dryer and he lapped at her sweet release.

  As she relaxed back down, Aaron withdrew, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and breathing hard to try to catch his breath. His eyes wandered over her lazy limbs, her arm draping off the side of the washer, her belly and breasts exposed with the button-down shirt hanging loosely by her sides. Her chest rose and fell to the same beat as his, and when he caught sight of her eyes, a fist locked around his heart.

  She was crying, softly at first, but as the seconds ticked by, her tears grew. Her hands came up and covered her face, her body starting to curl in on itself as she was overcome by whatever was plaguing her. If it was guilt, Aaron knew all too well how she was feeling, and his guilt doubled in size. Was she already regretting it?

  He pushed up off his knees, ignoring the ache in them from kneeling on the tile, and brushed her hair back. She kept her face covered, shaking her head back and forth, as if she felt that she didn’t deserve such a gentle touch after what they’d done.

  Aaron swallowed hard, pushing away the prickling sensations that were rushing to the surface. He coaxed her to a sitting position, carefully buttoned up the buttons that survived, and then pulled her onto his waist. She burrowed into his shoulder, her arms wrapping around his neck as he opened the laundry room door and took her to the living room couch. Charlie could be heard following them, but the pup stopped from jumping up with one sharp nod from Aaron.

  It was a mistake. Aaron knew it going in, but he did it anyway—rationalized it, thinking that he was being selfless, when he really was being selfish all over again. He gently put her down on the couch, sliding in next to her while she sobbed. His hand wrapped around the back of her head and eased her into his chest.

  “I’m sorry,” she said against his skin. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

  He softly shushed her apologies; they weren’t needed. At least not to him.

  But then his eyes drifted over to the urn propped up on the adjacent couch, and a part of him wondered if her apology was meant for him at all.

  Chapter 12

  Kennedy

  The twittering sound of birds just outside Aaron’s house roused Kennedy from a restless sleep. She hadn’t gotten much shut-eye, having drifted off at some point in the night, still tucked up in Aaron’s strong and comforting arms, but she woke after what felt like every few minutes from the crushing ache in her stomach.

  She had muttered half-broken apologies most of the night, and Aaron rocked and held her through it, only making her heart more and more confused. She’d thought it was only her body that was aching for a man’s touch, but the moment they collided, she felt something else—something she hadn’t felt for anyone besides Jared. It crushed her; she never thought in a hundred
years that she’d feel so connected to another person. She’d had her one, and she was a firm believer that one is all anyone is ever allowed to get.

  After her high, she’d crashed so hard that all that was left of her was a guilty conscience—not just for allowing another man to carry her over the falls of ecstasy, but for subconsciously comparing the experience to her previous ones…and knowing that it surpassed them all.

  She’d made love before. She’d been in the arms of and shared moments with a man who would own her heart forever…but…gah, there had to be a but…Aaron made her feel things that were not only familiar, but were so foreign and beautiful that she hadn’t believed they were possible. He hadn’t just given her pleasure, he’d sealed up wounds that were buried so deep she hadn’t even known they existed. Jared had loved her, but he’d never done that…because she never needed him to.

  She was an absolute traitor. Her heart was still cocooned for her first love, but her body wanted this new, powerful, and euphoric drug that Aaron provided.

  Her fingers twitched against the chest hair her hand had been resting on all night. She’d most likely ruined anything he’d been feeling for her, what with her inability to contain all her conflicting emotions. It was strange how this year had been the longest of her life, and nothing seemed to be moving forward. Then, suddenly, it went way too quickly.

  Aaron must have felt her waking, and he shifted underneath her, their skin sticking to each other from their shared body heat. Kennedy eased up, her muscles aching from the position she’d been in all night. She could only imagine what Aaron was feeling like, especially his neck as he tilted it from side to side.