He doesn 't give a tinker's damn.
jACQUES
And besides I wanted to make
sure that Monsieur - that you
had gotten back all right last night
1 32
SAMUEL BECKETT
and then to tell you how happy
those words of yours have made
us, Marie and me.
GLAZIER
Words? He has been wording?
JACQUES
I am perhaps being impertinent,
but it has never been the same
house since you left, Monsieur
Victor. We were not told anything,
naturally, but we knew enough to
get an idea of the life you were
leading (Circling look) A faint
idea. We - I am not boring you
Monsieur? (A silence) I am boring
you, I knew it.
GLAZIER
It doesn 't matter. Go on.
JACQUES
I may go on, Monsieur?
VICTOR
(To the Glazier) You will let me
through?
GLAZIER
Get this straight. I ask only one
thing, that you take shape. The
faintest glimmer of sense, enough
to make people say, Ah, it's that,
now I am beginning to understand, and I vanish .
VICTOR
(To Jacques) Go on .
JACQUES
I don 't quite know how to say it. I
was only wishing that you knew -
GLAZIER
Might have known.
JACQUES
How touched we have been ,
Marie and me, by what you told
us. We would have liked to tell you
last night, but you left so abruptly.
ELEUTHERIA
1 33
GLAZIER
Patience, patience .
jACQUES
We had so often asked ourselves
what had happened, why you
never came to the house. It distressed us to see Monsieur so sad.
We didn ' t want to think badly of
you, you had been so good to us,
and yet there were times when -
So it gave us quite a turn when
you explained -
GLAZIER
Explained? What did he explain?
jACQUES
(Spluttering) Why - he explained to us - he told us why why he couldn ' t do otherwise .
GLAZIER
He explained that to you?
jACQUES
Yes.
GLAZIER
And you understood? Qacques
embarrassed) You haven ' t understood a thing.
jACQUES
That is to say -
GLAZIER
You recall what he said?
jACQUES
We understood that it was serious,
that it wasn ' t -
GLAZIER
I am asking you to repeat a sentence for me, one whole sentence.
(A silence) This is first-rate , it's
not enough that he insists on
explaining himself only in the
wings, but he requires imbeciles
to the bargain .
jACQUES
I t was clear at the time . It isn 't
something you can talk about. It's
1 34
SAMUEL BECKETT
a little like music.
GlAZIER
Music! (He walks back and forth
in front of the door) How many
crimes! How many crimes! (He
halts) Music ! I see it from here .
Life, death , freedom, the whole
kit and caboodle, and the disillusioned little laughs to show they
are not taken in by the big words
and the bottomless silences and
the paralytic's gestures to signal
that that's not it, they say that but
that's not it, it's a different matter,
an altogether different matter,
what can you do, language isn 't
made to express those things. So
let's keep quiet, decency, a little
decency, goodnight, let's get to
bed, we who senselessly dared to
speak of something other than
staple rationing. Ah, I hear it,
your music. You were all plastered, naturally.
jACQUES
Plastered?
GlAZIER
He speaks ! It's music. You listen to
him. You understand. You no
longer understand. He loses his
shoes. He loses his jacket. At four
in the afternoon he is still snoring. He's raving. The towers circumcised - fire - fire. You come to see if he got back all
right. It's clear. (To Victor) I bet
ELEUTHERIA
1 35
you don ' t recall a word you said.
VICTOR
What? I can leave now?
GLAZIER
You see this character?
VICTOR
I don ' t understand.
GLAZIER
He's a domestic.
VICTOR
Well, I know him.
GLAZIER
He purposely takes the trouble to
thank you for the revelations that
you were nice enough to make
last night, to him and to someone
by the name of Marie . That,
you've understood?
VICTOR
Revelations? (To Jacques) I made
revelations to you?
GLAZIER
Call it what you like . What did you
tell him?
VICTOR
Why - I don ' t recall exactly. It
was of no interest.
GLAZIER
Music of no interest. You were all
plastered, I am telling you.
jACQUES
I assure you that -
GLAZIER
You don ' t know these exceptional
temperaments. One look at a cork
and they are out of commission.
You ' re not going to make me
believe he could confront his
papa's remains without the aid of
a stimulant.
VICTOR
Don 't you be concerning yourself
about my father.
GLAZIER
(Rubbing his hands) Ah, that's
1 36
SA.fUEL BECKETI
how we 'll get him !
AuDIEI'CE MEMBER (Standing up in a stage-box) Stop !
(He straddles stiffly the side of the
stage-box and comes down cautiously onto the stage. He advances toward the bed) I am sorry for this intrusion .
GLAZIER
You've been elected?
AuDIEI'CE MEMBER No, not precisely. But I 've been at
the bar, in the lobby, and I have
been chatting with relatives,
friends. I even came across a
critic, at the first intermission .
GLAZIER
Was he on his way in or on his way
out?
AUDIENCE MEMBER He was on his way out.
GLAZIER
In a word, you've been seeing
which way the wind lies.
AUDIEI'CE MEMBER There you go !
GLAZIER
And it's what has blown you in .
AUDIENCE MEMBER If you like . But basically I had just
to listen to myself. For I am not
one audience member, but a
thousand, all slightly different
from each other. I 've always been
like that, like an old blotter, of
extremely variable porosity.
GLAZIER
You can ' t be o
ne to get bored silly.
AuDIEI'CE MEMBER (With high seriousness) Actually,
yes, it can happen .
GLAZIER
And you have always been like
ELEUTHERIA
1 37
that, like an old blotter?
AUDIENCE MEMBER Monsieur, when I was a baby my
mother would sometimes deny me
the breast, doubtless deeming that
I was overindulging. Well, I saw
her point!
(Enter Madame Karl)
MME . .K.ARL
I 've had enough .
GlAZIER
Me too.
MME .K.ARL
(Advancing toward the bed, to
.
Victor) For the la -
(She sees the Audience member)
Who is this one here?
GlAZIER
It is the people 's commissary.
MME .K.ARL
I didn 't see him go by.
.
GlAZIER
He carne through the roof.
MME . .K.ARL
(To the Glazier) You think you ' re
hot stuff, don' t you?
GlAZIER
Stuff? What stuff, Madame? What
is this new insinuation?
MME . .K.ARL
Ah ! (Gesture of disgust, to Victor)
For the last time, are you staying
or are you leaving?
VICfOR
What?
MME .K.ARL
.
(Violently) I am asking you if you
are staying or if you are leaving.
I 've had a bellyful.
GlAZIER
You ' re not the only one.
VICfOR
If I am staying or if I am leaving.
(He reflects) You want to know if I
am staying or if I am leaving?
1 38
SAMUEL BECKETI
GlAZIER
That's not it, you haven't understood. She wants -
MME. KARL
(To the Glazier) Shut up ! (To
Victor) Yesterday you were leaving, then you were no longer
leaving, this morning you were
still leaving, yet here you are. You
have the bill. Pay me and beat it. I
have two blokes after the room.
VICTOR
You cannot drive me out like that.
MME. KARL
Drive you out! You were the one
asking to leave !
VICTOR
I believe I made a mistake.
GlAZIER
And besides what do you mean by
this kind of behavior? Don 't you
see we are in conference? It is a
historic moment and you come
and pester us with your running
on about some furnished room.
MME. KARL
You know what you can do with
your conferences.
VICTOR
Listen, Madame Karl, I am going
out in a little while - (He falls
in to a reverie)
MME. KARL
You know -
GlAZIER
Shush ! He is meditating.
(A silence)
VICTOR
I am going out for some fresh air.
GlAZIER
What poetry! What profundity!
VICTOR
I will tell you on my way out what
I 've decided.
ELEUTHERIA
1 39
MME. KARL
And then on your way back you' ll
tell me that you changed your
mind.
VICfOR
No, Madame Karl, it will be a firm
decision, I promise you.
MME. �
Because I 've had just about
enough.
GlAZIER
And what do you think I 've had?
MME. KARL
Up to here . ( She indicates the
level. Exit)
(A silence)
AUDIENCE MEMBER That woman is right. (Pause)
What was I saying? Oh yes, my
mother, yes -
STAGE-BOX VOICE Enough blabbering! Cut to the
chase !
GlAZIER
Better you, obviously, than rotten
eggs.
AUDIENCE MEMBER I promise nothing. (Takes out his
watch) Ten-thirty. Which means
this has been going on for an
hour and a half. (He puts back his
watch. To Victor) Can you imagine?
VIcroR
What?
GlAZIER
Don ' t make things worse .
AUDIENCE MEMBER You are right. I will try to stay
calm. And to act quickly. For time
(He takes out his watch) is awasting. (He puts back his watch)
Sit down .
1 40
SAMUEL BECKETI
GLAZIER
Sit down?
AUDIENCE MEMBER Why, yes. We are all sick and tired
of seeing you float about like
leaves, in the void.
GLAZIER
But where?
AuDIENCE MEMBER On the floor, on the bed, wherever you like.
GLAZIER
(To Jacques) Well, my friend,
what do you say to that?
jACQUES
I must go.
AuDIENCE MEMBER (Vehemently) Sit down ! Qacques
and the Glazier, the latter with
feigned eagerness, sit on the bed,
one on either side of Victor who
has sunk back on his elbow and
whom the Glazier roughly sits
back up straight. The Audience
member turns around toward the
stage-box) Hand me a chair,
Maurice. (A chair is handed to
him) And my coat. ( His coat is
handed to him. He brings the
chair in front of the bed, puts on
his coat, sits down, crosses his legs,
runs his hand through his thinning hair, gets up again, goes back
under the stage-box) And my hat.
(His hat is handed to him, he puts
it on and goes back and sits down )
GLAZIER
I forgot my scratch-pad.
AuDIENCE MEMBER I will be brief. Interrupt only if
you are sure you can show off
ELEUTHERIA
1 4 1
your cleverness. We 've had to g o a
bit without up to now. (He clears
his throat) There. I ' ll try to stay
within the bounds of good taste .
This farce has - but I was forgetting. Before we start (to the Glazier) , where is your son today?
GlAZIER
He is sick.
AUDIENCE MEMBER Here we have an answer worthy of
this production . I am not asking
you how he is, I am asking you
WHERE HE IS.
GLAZIER
He is at home, in bed.
AUDIENCE MEMBER And the mother?
GlAZIER
(Threateningly) Don ' t you be
concerning yourself about the
mother.
AUDIENCE MEMBER All right, all right, that's all we
wan ted to know.
GlAZIER
Fortunately for you.
AUDIENCE MEMBER All right. This farce - (He again
clears his throat, but this time,
instead of swallowing the result,
he expels it into his handkerchief) - this farce has gone on
long enough .
GLAZIER
My very own words.
AUDIENCE MEMBER I say farce intentionally, in the
hope of covering for you. That's
what is done by our best
authors,
labelling their most serious works
in this way in case they can ' t
1 42
SAMUEL BECKETT
possibly be taken seriously.
STAGE-BOX VOICE No more farting around! The
chase, the chase .
AUDIENCE MEMBER It's odd. No sooner among you,
on the boards, than I start losing
my grip. (Pause) A by no means
inconsiderable one. (Pause)
Everything is becoming hazy,
vague, and I can no longer make
heads or tails out of it. ( Puts his
hand before his eyes) I don 't even
know any more what I was saying.
STAGE-BOX VOICE The play's the thing! Enough
already.
(The prompter emerges from his
box, climbs up on the stage, the
script in his hand)
PROMPTER
That's it! All over! You are not
following the script. You make me
sick. Goodnight. (Exit)
GLAZIER
The script! The script! Leave the
script with us ! (Enter the script by
air. It crashes to earth) We ' re
really in for it now!
AuDIENCE MEMBER I am going to make one last
effort.
GLAZIER
Just a minute ! (To jacques and
Victor) What are you muttering
for like that? (They go silent. To
the Audience member) What do
you expect me to do with a guy
like that?
ELEUTHERIA
1 43
AuDIENCE MEMBER Let me fill you in. Now it's all
coming back to me. This farce -
GLAZIER
But you don ' t need to repeat the
same thing ten times. You ' re not
in the lavatory any more , with the
critics. Next. Next.
AuDIENCE MEMBER You ' re wrong to go back over the
critics. They can 't bear more than
one kick per play. It's not like
cuckolds.
GLAZIER
Say what you have to say and let's
have done with it.
AuDIENCE MEMBER I notice one thing, I didn ' t leave .
Why? Out of curiosity? If you like.
For I am in part vile , by definition .
To see whether you ' re going to be
able to make him speak? If you
like. To witness your absurd poisoning scene? I admit it, I am as
much your village gossip as the
gentleman who doesn ' t get taken
in. And besides my friend's wife is
free only after eleven o 'clock and
for all that it's a little warmer here
than in the cafe . (He shivers,
turns up his coat-collar) But all
that isn ' t much . No, if I ' m still
here it's that there is something in
this business that literally paralyzes me and leaves me completely
dumbfounded. How do you
explain that? You play chess? No.
It doesn 't matter. It's like when
1 44
SAMUEL BECKETI
you watch a chess game between
players of the lowest class. For
three quarters of an hour they
haven't touched a single piece .