Page 10 of Gómez Arias


  CHAPTER IX.

  Ye fair! Be greatly cautious of your sliding hearts! Dare not the infectious sigh; nor in the bower Where woodbines flaunt, and roses shed a couch, While evening draws her crimson curtain round, Trust your soft minutes with betraying man.

  _Thomson._

  In the most retired part of Monteblanco's garden, reclining on a rusticseat, under the fragrant canopy of the myrtle and arbutus, sat a femaleform enveloped in a loosely flowing dress of virgin whiteness. The airwas cool and serene, and except the rustling of the surrounding foliage,when agitated by the breeze, or the soft plaintive voice of thenightingale, no obtrusive sound disturbed the solemn silence. The bluevault of heaven, glittering with countless stars, the rich perfumeflung around by the orange flower and jasmine, and a stilly languor thatpervaded the spot, all disposed the mind to gentle and loving thoughts.

  Theodora, however, sat absorbed in silent sorrow and abstraction: herlong clustering tresses fell in luxuriance over her white and polishedneck, almost concealing in their profusion the traits of a countenanceovercast with grief and despondency.

  But a figure appears on the garden wall, and the sound as of some onefalling is heard on the soft turf. Theodora starts, yet a suddenrecollection seems to check her momentary fear. The nocturnal visitorwas Gomez Arias, who had received a hasty summons from Theodora, andsurmising that some unpleasant intelligence awaited him, he hurried inbreathless expectation to the place of appointment.

  What was his amazement, upon his arrival!--He beheld his Theodora, notin the joyful eagerness of affection springing forward to meet hisembrace, but silent and dejected. Her intelligent countenance no longerbeamed with that charming smile which his appearance never failed tocreate. Motionless and unmoved she appeared, amongst the flowery shrubsand verdant foliage of the garden, like some statue of chaste andclassical beauty, placed to embellish and diversify the sylvan spot.

  Gomez Arias is before her, and yet she seems hardly conscious of hispresence. He gazes on her with surprise, and then gently whispers herdear name. The well known voice recalls her scattered ideas, and itsmagic sound awakens her benumbed sensations to fresh warmth and life.She raised her head, threw aside the rich clusters of her hair, and astream of moonlight falling on her countenance revealed to Gomez Arias apicture of sorrowing love.

  Her eye was swollen with grief, and the big tears in quick successionchased each other down her pallid cheek.

  Don Lope approached her tenderly, and folding her in his arms,endeavoured to calm her emotion, by the most soothing and endearingexpressions.

  "Theodora, what means this sorrow? Whatever be the misfortune whichthreatens us, do not vainly yield yourself a prey to terror, before youknow the means I may have of averting it." Then, as if struck by apassing thought, he added--"You surely cannot entertain a distant doubtof the singleness--the devotedness of my affection?"

  "Doubt of your affection! Oh, heavens! do not even mention the appallingword; there is something more terrible than death in the very idea. No,no," she continued, with vivid earnestness; "I do not; I cannot; I willnot doubt of your affection. If ever such agonizing----"

  She could not proceed, for her imagination was so powerfully acted upon,even with the remote image of such a misfortune, that she was obliged toremain some time silent before she could control her emotions.

  "No," she resumed; "I cannot doubt your affection. But there is anothercalamity in store for me that will assuredly render wretched the rest ofmy existence."

  She again stopped, and her tears flowed more abundantly than ever.

  Gomez Arias felt relieved from a heavy foreboding; for the idea that hisengagement with Leonor de Aguilar had come to the knowledge of Theodora,had at first filled his mind with apprehensions. He was accordingly moreat ease, feeling an inward conviction that however distressing thedreaded intelligence might prove, he should still find resources withinhimself to avert its dangers.

  "Speak, my Theodora; unfold the cause of your extraordinary sorrow, anddo not weep and tremble thus."

  "Oh, Lope!" she despondingly cried, "I must renounce you for ever."

  "For heaven's sake, calm this agitation, Theodora, and let me know theworst. But yesterday you were as happy as a heart teeming with genuineaffection, and blessed with a most unbounded return, can make a mortal,and now----"

  "He is come," she fearfully interrupted him; "my destined husband iscome."

  Gomez Arias appeared staggered at this unexpected information, butimmediately recovering himself in apparent calmness, demanded the nameof his rival. "Who is it," he cried, "that boldly claims the hand of myTheodora?--No doubt some noble and distinguished cavalier."

  "Alas! your supposition is but too just," replied the weeping girl; "andit is that circumstance which adds to the poignancy of my grief: were hea less estimable character, were he divested of those amiable qualitiesthat render man dear to the eyes of woman, my reasons for refusing hisaddresses would be unanswerable. In that case, if I were made a victimto parental authority, some consolation might be found in the convictionthat the inextinguishable hatred which I bore him was grounded onjustice. But the man that seeks an alliance with our house is one whosechoice would confer the greatest honor on the most exalted of the land.Brave, generous, of noble birth, and alike distinguished for thesuperiority of his mind and person, he is in the highest favor with thequeen, who has intrusted him with the command of one of the divisionswhich are now marching against the rebel Moors."

  Theodora made these observations in the perfect simplicity of her heart,but she unconsciously excited an idea of the most galling nature in themind of her lover. Not that he felt the pangs of jealousy, for he wastoo confident both in his own merit, and the unparalleled affection ofhis beloved; but yet he was inwardly mortified at the encomiums bestowedon another, inasmuch as they gave rise to a comparison which he couldnot easily brook. He, therefore, with some asperity of tone, inquiredthe name of this accomplished knight; and Theodora, who perceived theinward workings of his soul, with a faultering voice pronounced the nameof Don Antonio de Leyva. The sound operated like an electric shock onthe mind of Gomez Arias, and despite of his habitual self-command, signsof uncommon perturbation were discernible in his countenance.

  "What!" he cried, "Don Antonio de Leyva,--that presumptuous, thatdetested youth!"

  Here he checked his emotion; pride resumed the mastery over hisirritated feelings, and with a forced gaiety of manner, he continued,--

  "Certainly Don Antonio is a gallant cavalier, and well calculated tocaptivate a woman's affections."

  He stopped; for his surprise had been too abrupt, and his manner too illdisguised to continue long in this constrained suppression of his realfeelings. Gomez Arias hated Don Antonio on no other plea, than the famehe was daily acquiring for his valour and brilliant qualities. Besides,he could not forget his adventure in the tournament, when Don Antoniocrossed him in his career, and well nigh endangered the reputation hehad that day acquired. He looked on him, therefore, as a dangerousrival, and felt chagrined at the command with which the queen hadinvested him, as it would afford him opportunities of grounding hisclaims to her royal favor on the firmest foundation.

  Theodora was far from suspecting the cause of her lover's agitation. Shenaturally attributed to a feeling of jealousy, what was in fact theeffect of restless emulation. A long pause ensued, during which thestate of Theodora became more distressing, as she perceived her lover'scountenance gradually assuming an unusual expression of sternness.Various passions seemed to be contending for mastery in his bosom, butthe feeling of wounded pride soon appeared to predominate. His eyesglistened with indignant fire, his lip curled with a bitter smile, andthe flush of anger mantled on his brow.

  "Theodora!" he said, fixing earnestly his eyes on the trembling girl;"Theodora, you have deceived me!"

  "Deceive you, Gomez Arias!" She looked petrified at the baresupposition. "Deceived you! And can you for a mo
ment harbour such acruel, such a degrading suspicion? Oh! Lope, is it possible you canthink thus basely of your Theodora?"

  "Why was not I made acquainted with this engagement before?"

  "I was ignorant of it myself; the marriage had been settled between myfather and Don Antonio, without consulting my inclination. Alas! thefirst intelligence I received, was to bid me prepare for the ceremony,which is to take place immediately.--My dearest Lope," she added withtenderness; "Oh! never again harrow up my feelings, with doubts unworthyof our mutual passion."

  She clung to Don Lope's neck, and pressing him with the earnestness ofunbounded confidence and love--"Never," she continued, "had Theodora asingle thought concealed from you; you, the absolute master of my heart,and the most secret wishes of my soul."

  Then in a more composed manner, she proceeded; "It was but this morningthat Don Antonio arrived, when my father immediately proceeded toannounce the purport of his visit. My amazement at first knew no bounds;I remonstrated on the abruptness of the proposal, and endeavoured, bygentle expostulation, to ward off the threatening blow. But myentreaties, and my tears were in vain. My father, strenuously bent onthe accomplishment of his wishes, left me the only option of yieldingimplicit obedience to his mandates, or passing the rest of my existencein the solitary gloom of a convent. My choice is made; I lose you,Lope;"--and here her anguish almost overpowered her utterance; "I loseyou for ever, but your dear image shall be constantly before me in thosedark abodes of penitence and woe. Thither must I go, and leave all thesedear scenes, and the dearer sight of you, consigned to unrelentingmisery. Not humbly, alas! to pray; not to abjure the world; for ah! Icannot abjure that world which contains the fondest object that links meto life. I go not in the humble mood of a repentant sinner, to weep overa guilty life, but in the desponding resolution of a fond woman, eagerto keep her faith unbroken to him of her heart's first and onlyattachment. For you, oh Lope, my tears will flow; you alone will be thetheme of my constant meditations--my fervent prayers. In my hopelesssolitude, I may perhaps feel one glimpse of consolation;--the idea thatyou may be happy, and that even in the glittering scenes of ambition,you will sometimes revert to the cheerless abode of Theodora. This willafford me some solace in my affliction. And when the hand of deathreleases me from my odious chains, your tears will tenderly fall on thegrave of her, whose greatest crime was that of loving you too well."

  "Theodora!" exclaimed Gomez Arias, moved by the picture she had drawn;"and is this then the only remedy you can devise?"

  "What!" cried she eagerly, "is there any other to be found?"

  She paused, and gazed on Gomez Arias, with anxious expectation,breathless with hope.

  Don Lope, after a momentary lapse, with a chilling coldness,observed--"You do not love me, Theodora!"

  "Oh Heavens!" she cried in the hurried accents of terror--"Never, Lope,never utter those killing words;--what do you require of me?--Speak,Gomez Arias, speak: I will do all, to convince you of the sincerity ofmy affection, and the cruel injustice of your words."

  "You must fly then from the abode of parental oppression," calmlyreplied Don Lope; "and in your lover you shall find that tenderness,which a father denies; nay, start not, these words may perhaps alarmyou, yet consider it is our only resource, and that imperious necessityis a law to which we must all submit. In a short time you shall be minein the face of heaven, and now, you must resolve to follow me."

  Theodora started at the proposition. She fixed her eyes on Gomez Arias,and with a deep but tranquil anguish exclaimed--"Alas, Don Lope! Isthis the remedy you propose? Can you indeed tempt me to abandon myfather in his declining years, to regret and shame?"

  "You had already determined to abandon him," observed Gomez Arias.

  "No, Lope," she replied; "by that step, I should only disappoint him inhis expectations--not incur his merited hatred and malediction;--hisgrief would be tempered by resignation, not corroded with the sting ofshame." "Don Lope," she then continued with dignity, "command my life;but oh! never, never require of me the commission of a crime, as theproof of my love."

  "Stay, Theodora," interrupted Gomez Arias, with a composure that illagreed with the terrific cloud gathering on his brow; "stay, you areright, and I must retract my words: the offer was dictated in thetransports of sincere and ardent love, and as the only means left us inthe hour of danger. But I perceive that I have mistaken yoursentiments; such actions were only made for souls capable of feelingand appreciating the extent of a true passion; not for cold and timorousbeings like yourself. I flattered my fond pride, that in you I had metwith a miracle of deep and all-absorbing affection, but I am deceived,and sorely shall I repent my delusion; I now see you in your truecolours; you are like the rest of your feeble sex, pleased with thegratification of their vanity, but incapable of a bold and generousresolution in favor of the man they pretend to love. I will not upbraidyou; but from this moment cast you from me as a piece of inanimate clay,a painted thing, alike incapable of estimating and sharing my regard."

  Saying this he rudely disengaged himself from her arms, whilst theunfortunate Theodora, affrighted at the violence of his manner, fixed onhim a wild and vacant stare, the intensity of her grief depriving her ofthe power of reflection. But when she saw her lover actually recedingfrom the place, her mind started from its abstraction, and her thoughtswere fixed upon the dreadful desertion that now threatened her. She gavea frantic shriek, and fell lifeless on the ground.

  Alarmed at the effect produced by his passionate and cruel proceeding,Gomez Arias hurried back to the spot, and raising the lovely victim fromthe ground, gazed on her with all the anxiety of returning affection.Theodora was in his arms, but, alas! her beautiful eyes were closed, hercheek was colourless, and a cold suffusion bathed her stiffened limbs.The vital spark had apparently deserted its frail tenement, for no signof conscious life was there. Don Lope's angry feelings had given way tohis fears for her safety, and as he wiped the cold dew from her face, heperceived blood trickling slowly down her marble brow. In the violenceof her fall upon the gravelled walk, a flint had wounded her forehead,and the crimson drops that issued from it contrasted mournfully with thefrozen paleness of her countenance.

  Gomez Arias was moved as he gazed intensely on the angelic creature nowbefore him. This was no artful fiction, no solemn mockery of woe: a fewwords had worked that dreadful revolution in her mind. Perhaps there isat times an indescribable cruelty in love that prompts a man, in acertain degree, to enjoy the misery which is wrought by an excess ofaffection towards him, and triumph now mingled with compassion in theabandoned lover's heart. He was, however, soon called to more generoussentiments. Anxiety and regret took place of vanity, while his passionfor Theodora acquired new intensity as he scanned her beauteous figureand contemplated the distress he had occasioned. With the most endearingefforts he endeavoured to reanimate the lifeless form of Theodora. Heardently pressed the yielding burthen to his heart, placed his glowingcheek by the cold one of his mistress, fervently kissed the crimsonstain upon her forehead, and then bound it with a scarf.

  Theodora, however, for some time gave no sign of life. Don Lope calledher by the most tender names, sprinkled her face with the water of aneighbouring fountain, and exhausted himself in efforts to revive her.At last she gently opened her eyes, a scarce perceptible motion shookher frame, and shortly after she raised her white fingers to herforehead, as if conscious of sensation. She heaved a deep sigh, andGomez Arias watching with anxious gaze the progress of her revivingsenses, strove with soothing fondness to hasten their return. Her eyesgently opened, and a sad smile played upon her lip, as she acknowledgedthe tender solicitude of her lover, unable as yet to express herself bywords.

  "Theodora, my dearest, don't you know me?"

  Her abstracted senses awoke as if from a horrid dream, and with fearfuland convulsive clasp she hung to Don Lope's neck.

  "He is not gone--no, no, I have him here--" The rest of her sentence waslost in a hysteric laugh.

  "No, my love," ten
derly said Gomez Arias, "I am not gone, nor ever will.I am a barbarian to treat you thus. I do not merit such excellence asthine, and, I crave thy forgiveness for the misery I have inflicted."

  Theodora, now perfectly restored, saw the stain of blood on her lover'slip, then she felt the bandage on her forehead, and when Gomez Ariasexplained the nature of her wound, the fond girl rejoiced at a causethat had called forth her lover's anxiety and caresses.

  They remained in profound silence, which they were both afraid to break,for they trembled to renew a subject which had produced such melancholyeffects.

  But time was swiftly flying, and Gomez Arias again urged the necessityof adopting some resolution.

  "Theodora," he said, "the night is wearing fast away, her friendly shadewill but for a short time longer favor us, and the morning must, alas!throw still darker shadows over our brightest hopes."

  Theodora sighed deeply, but was unable to reply.

  "What is to be done?" demanded Don Lope. "Is it your wish that we shouldpart for ever?"

  "Part for ever!" cried Theodora; "Oh Heavens! the idea is more than Ican endure."

  "There is no other alternative left us," said Gomez Arias, "unless youfeel yourself courageous enough to--" and here he cast an inquiringglance, and waited her reply; for though the purport of his meaning wasobvious, he felt almost afraid to convey it by language.

  Theodora's distress increased, and her fond arms that had till nowencircled her lover's neck, loosened their hold, whilst her head droopeddespondingly upon her bosom.

  After a short pause--"My love," continued Gomez Arias, "you must decide,and instantly, we have but a short time more to remain."

  "Don Lope," exclaimed the afflicted girl, with impassioned eagerness,"pity! oh pity my horrible situation, and do not tempt me with a crime,to which my own fond woman's heart urges me but too strongly. No, do notexert that uncontrollable power which you possess over my very soul, tosink me deeper into the abyss of misery, that must embitter my futureexistence. Do not force me to destroy the tranquillity and comfort of avenerable parent--of that parent, whose greatest fault is his excessivefondness and solicitude for his child. Though by his last determinationhe has completed my misery, he is nevertheless more deserving of pitythan reproach. Alas! while he destroys my felicity and repose, hecherishes the idea, that he is laying the foundation of the futurehappiness of his child."

  "Yes!" cried Gomez Arias, smiling bitterly, "by forcing her to waste herlife in a cloister."

  "No," exclaimed Theodora, "he does not suppose me capable of such aterrible resolution; he is ignorant that my affections areirretrievably bestowed on another, fondly imagining that I shall notlong be insensible to the merits of the husband he has chosen."

  She fell on the ground, and clasping the knees of her lover, proceededwith redoubled emotion--"Oh, Lope, I know but too well my own weakness!Take, therefore, compassion on my distress, urge me no further, and donot avail yourself of the tenderness and self-devotion of one who adoresyou, to render her a cruel and delinquent daughter."

  Gomez Arias was powerfully struck with the earnestness of her manner; henever imagined he should meet with such opposition from a heart soenthusiastically devoted. He could not but admire the generosity andnobleness of feeling which thus voluntarily condemned itself to a lifeof solitude and despair, rather than deviate in the smallest degree frommoral rectitude. Yet he was inwardly mortified at her superiority, andwould fain have persuaded himself that her scruples proceeded ratherfrom a deficiency of passion than from a sense of honor and filialduty. He looked on her with a mixture of compassion and disappointmentas he endeavoured to raise her from the ground.

  "No, never," she cried, "never will I rise till you grant my request."

  "Rise, rise, Theodora," said he gloomily, "and listen to me for the lasttime.--Since it is your desire, I will no longer, press a sacrifice Iwas naturally bound to expect from your repeated, and apparentlysincere, protestations of regard. Since you will have it so, I mustyield. I will begone immediately; but if you are to be for ever lost tome, think not I will tamely submit to my wrongs. I will seek out thecause of our misfortunes, and if he is the valiant knight report speakshim, I shall then find the only solace left me in my desolation, that oftaking ample vengeance or falling nobly by his weapon. And now," headded after a short pause, "farewell Theodora! Farewell, for we part forever!"

  "No, you cannot," franticly cried Theodora, "you must not leave methus. Oh Lope! you were always tender, and generous, and kind.--Neverdid you in the slightest manner wound my heart till this dreadfulnight."

  "True," replied Don Lope, "and never till the present moment could Idoubt your love."

  "Oh Lope! Lope! and is it to your Theodora you speak thus! In pityrecall those dreadful words."

  "Silly girl," vehemently exclaimed Gomez Arias, "what do you require ofme? Or what is it that you wish? You have chosen your path, let me nowtake mine, unless you force me in my anguish to curse the hour when Ifirst beheld you."

  "Curse the day you saw me!" As she uttered this exclamation aninvoluntary chill crept over her, which seemed to have frozen thesprings of her heart.

  "Theodora," he now said in a tone of sad reproach, "dry your tears--youwill soon have bitter occasion for them. May you enjoy that reposewhich you have for ever destroyed in my heart--Farewell! Farewell!"

  As he said this he gently strove to disengage himself from her hold. Thestruggle was too powerful for her nature, and like the poor bird whenunder the magic influence of the serpent, yields itself to thedestructive charm, Theodora, unable any longer to combat with heroverpowering feelings, threw herself into her lover's arms, andexclaimed passionately upon his bosom--"No, no, dear Lope, we will notpart. Let it be as you will." She paused, and then added withsolemnity--"It is decreed that I must be wretched, but you at leastshall never have reason to reproach me."

  Gomez Arias clasped her fondly to his breast, and in the transports ofhis joy, endeavoured to draw a glowing picture of their futurehappiness.

  "My dearest Theodora, hush your apprehensions and unreasonable fears. Atthe first opportunity we marry. Your father will at last relent, andeven if he should prove deaf to the appeal of nature, the love andgratitude of Gomez Arias will supply the loss."

  "Oh that is my only consolation," she interrupted with eagerness. "Loveme, Lope, love me even as I love you. No, no, that is not possible. But,oh, if thy love should ever decrease--deceive me! in pity deceive me! Donot let me suspect the dreadful truth--No, let death first conceal fromme so terrible a secret."

  Gomez Arias again tenderly essayed to calm her agitation, and then urgedthe necessity of quitting the place with the utmost expedition. She madeno longer any resistance, for she had advanced too far now to recede,and leaning on her lover she was almost carried along the garden.

  Gomez Arias quickly made a signal, and a ladder of ropes was thrown fromthe other side. At the sight Theodora could scarcely restrain the agonyof her feelings. A crowd of thoughts distracted her mind--a load ofanguish was upon her breast, and had it not been for the support of herlover, she would have fallen. Gomez Arias bore the trembling girlacross the wall, but as she stood for an instant on the summit, she casta long melancholy look on the home of her innocence and childhood--thenow deserted abode, of a venerable parent, and with a heart throbbingwith anguish, she intrusted herself to the protection of her lover.

 
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