Glancing over to my father, he smiled and motioned with his head for me to keep talking.
“I tried like hell to stay away from her.” With a chuckle, I looked at him and asked, “Do you remember when I went to Durango that summer?”
He nodded.
“She was there. I couldn’t believe it when she walked up to me and told me about some stupid bet she was in with her sister and friends. It was almost like a sign or something. Anyway, I ran into her one day back at school and ended up going back to her apartment. Things started to get a bit . . . heavy . . . but she stopped it and dropped the news on me that she was a virgin.”
“Oh God,” my father whispered. “Please tell me you didn’t?”
My father and I had always had such a close relationship. Finally being able to allow myself to talk to him about what was going on was somewhat of a relief. I knew he would listen and not judge me.
“As much as I wanted to, nothing happened. She wanted to stop, so we did. I respected her too much. But then she started talking about her plans after school and how she wanted to be some financial analyst for her grandfather and it hit me. Our lives would never go down the same path.”
With a huff, he shook his head. “Why?”
“Dad, for one, she’s way too good for me. Beautiful, smart as hell, and wants a life in the city. I’m a rancher. My life consists of mending fences, raising cows, and coming home smelling like fucking hell.”
He lifted a brow. “Do you wish you had gone a different route?”
I sighed heavily. “No. I mean at one point I wasn’t sure, but I know this is the life for me. This is the life I want and I would never ask her to give up her dreams to be with me.”
“So instead you told her how you felt?”
“Um . . . not exactly. I ignored her mostly.”
His hands slapped against his face as he made some horrible sounds and dragged them down before dropping them to his sides. “You ignored the girl?”
“Mostly. When I couldn’t take it, I’d send her a text or talk to her just to hear her voice. Dad, I’m no good for her. I fucking woke up with a girl in my bed one night after seeing Taylor at a party. I got so drunk I screwed around with two different women. Who does that kind of shit if they care about someone else? The guilt about tore me in two. I had to tell her about it just to get it off my chest.”
His mouth fell open. “You . . . you didn’t. You told her that?”
I slowly nodded my head. “Well, I kind of left out the fact I had slept with two girls on the same night and mentioned just the one.” He pushed off from the truck and walked up to me and slapped the living shit out of the back of my head. “What kind of idiot did I raise? First off, don’t ever mention the other girl to her. She doesn’t need to know what one stupid drunk night led you to do.” Shaking his head, he asked, “Why in the world would you tell a girl about sleeping with another girl?”
“I-I don’t know! She confuses me!”
He shook his head. “She confuses you? Tell me you didn’t do anything else to hurt this poor girl.”
I swallowed hard. “I um . . . I tried to stay away from her, Dad. I honestly did, but every time I would look at her, she would be looking at me. I thought we could make it work.”
His face fell. “What. Did. You. Do?”
I dropped my hands to my knees as I tried to bring air into my lungs. “It was in Paris. I couldn’t take it any longer. I needed to tell her how much I wanted her and loved her.”
“Loved her?”
“She skipped lunch and I went to her hotel room.”
“Oh mother of God, I’m not liking where this is going. Did you say you loved her?”
I dragged in a deep breath. “Yes, Dad. I said I love her.”
He swallowed hard and motioned for me to keep talking. “I told her I didn’t think I was good enough for her and she said it was nonsense. She asked me to make love to her and . . . and . . . I did. I made her mine.”
Standing up, I turned to him. “I told her I loved her and she told me she loved me and always would. That freaked the hell out of me. Afterwards, I ran into Cammie who told me Taylor would never be happy with me and I freaked out.”
“Who is Cammie and define you freaked out?”
“Cammie is the girl I slept with that I told Taylor about.”
He nodded his head. “The freaking out? What did you do?”
“I told Taylor things between us wouldn’t work and she got upset.”
He let out a curt laugh and walked away from me as he said, “I would imagine she would be upset seeing as you just had sex with her. Tell me, was she still a virgin, and please for the love of all that is good in this world say no.”
I frowned and shook my head. “I did what I thought was best. If I kept acting like everything was okay, we would have grown apart and you know I’m right. She would have been in Austin and me here. How would that have worked, Dad? I mean, when I talk to her I can still feel—”
He opened the door to the truck, grabbed something and then slammed it shut before walking over to me.
“When you talk to her? You still talk to this girl?”
“Of course I do. I love and care about her.”
His mouth fell open. “Listen to what you just said. You have toyed with this girl’s heart, Jase. You took her virginity, told her you loved her and then five minutes later told her things wouldn’t work out, yet you still talk to her?”
“I love her, Dad! I can’t help the way I feel.”
My father scrubbed his hands down his face and moaned. “That poor girl. If I was her father I’d hunt you down and shoot you in the balls.”
I moved my hand and adjusted myself. The very thought of being shot in the balls made my stomach turn.
“I said I messed up!”
He shook his head and pointed his finger at me. I’d never seen my dad so mad before. “No, Jase, you didn’t mess up. You fucked up. You royally fucked up.”
I closed my eyes and silently cursed myself. “I know and I feel like I can’t function right. My sleeping is off, I never feel like eating, and yesterday she said she had a date.”
“Good. I’m glad she had a date. You can’t take something like that from someone and then change your mind. You deserve whatever punishment she gives you.”
My mouth snapped shut as I stared at him.
“She is moving on. Jase, if you have no intention of making a future with this girl, you have to let her go.”
I’d never in my life felt the urge to cry. Except for when my mother accidentally dumped my fish into the garbage disposal. I actually cried then. Poor, Shark. He didn’t stand a chance.
“I can’t let her go.” Turning away before the threat of tears turned into a water show, I shook my head. “I can’t let her go, Dad.”
His hand gripped my shoulder as he squeezed it. “Jase, you either love this girl enough to let her go, or you go after her and drop down on your knees and beg her to forgive the stupid ass way you handled things. If it’s meant to be, love will figure out a way.”
With a slight push, he mumbled something about the apple not falling far. “Come on, let’s get this stuff put in the truck and get back to the house. Your mother will have dinner ready soon.”
The entire ride back to the house I stared out the window. My heart told me what I should do, if only my head had the same plan.
Taylor
“How was the date?”
Gazing down at my beautiful niece, Charlotte, I smiled and said, “It was okay.”
“Okay? That’s it?”
With a shrug, I made baby sounds while Charlotte stared off into space. “Yep. That’s it.”
“Huh.”
Glancing over my shoulder, I stared at my sister. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
With a shrug of her shoulders and a smirk, she replied, “Nothing. It’s just you haven’t really been the same since your little encounter with Jase in Paris.”
The
mention of his name had my body reacting. “I don’t want to talk about him.”
“Huh.”
“Ugh. Stop saying that, Meg!”
“I’m not saying anything.”
I placed Charlotte in her bassinet and sighed as I fell back onto the couch. “You’re implying something.”
“I’m doing no such thing.”
Peeking over to Grace, I couldn’t help but notice her holding back a smile as she held her son, Trey, in her lap. “What are you smiling about?” I snapped.
“Damn girl, settle your tits. I’m not smiling about anything.”
Turning to look at Meagan, Grace frowned as Meagan said, “Told you.”
Standing, I shook my head. “So, I hardly ever get to come to town and hang out with y’all and this is how it’s going to be?”
“Sorry, Tay, it’s not fair of us. We’ll stop,” Meagan said as Grace laughed.
“The hell we will. I’m guessing by your bitch mood you’re in, the date didn’t go like you planned and you most likely thought about Jase the entire night.”
“I did not.”
Grace lifted her eyes and gave me a really look.
“As much as I love hanging out here, I think I’m going to go visit Lauren. She won’t mention Jase.”
Grace made a huff sound as my sister laughed.
Twenty minutes later I was knocking on my best friend Lauren’s door.
“Oh my glitter! Tay, what are you doing here?”
I couldn’t help but smile as I took in Lauren. Something was different about her. Her face seemed to be glowing.
“Just wanted to come visit everyone. I was missing home.”
Pulling me in, Lauren engulfed me in a hug and started crying.
“It’s . . . so . . . good . . . to . . . see . . . you!”
I patted her back as I replied, “It’s good seeing you too, sweetie.” Pulling back, I looked at her cautiously. “Lauren, is everything okay?”
With a wave of her hand, she nodded. “Yep. I’m just so happy to see you.”
I had known Lauren my whole life and I knew something was not right. She was never this emotional. “Did you and Colt have a fight?”
Her head pulled back in surprise. “What? God no! Everything with Colt is amazing. It’s beyond amazing.”
Breaking down into tears again, I wrapped my arms around her and led her over to the couch. “Please tell me what’s wrong, Lauren.”
She wiped her tears away and smiled. “Oh, Tay, nothing is wrong. Everything is perfect. It’s amazing. It’s beyond amazing.”
Her eyes were a beacon of happiness. “Yes. You’ve already said that. Dang, you must have had some good sex this morning to be in this good of a mood.”
With a slight push, she shook her head. “I’m about to burst!”
“With?”
Placing her hand over her mouth, her eyes teared up again.
“Okay, you’re freaking me out. Are you about to burst because something happy has happened?”
She nodded.
“With you?”
She nodded again.
I laughed and said in a kidding tone, “You’re pregnant.”
Lauren stared at me with the biggest smile on her face I’d ever seen.
“Oh. My. Lauren! You’re pregnant?”
We both jumped up at once and wrapped each other up in a hug while jumping like fools.
“I’m pregnant!”
“You’re pregnant!”
When we finally settled down, I held her out at arm’s length. “No wonder you’re glowing. I noticed it the moment you opened the door. When did you find out?”
“Ten minutes ago!”
“Oh wow . . . wait. What? You just found out?”
She jumped up and down as she screamed out, “Yes!”
“Holy . . .”
“Shit! Holy shit!” Lauren said as she grabbed my hand and pulled me to the master bathroom. When she picked up the pregnancy test, she squealed and shoved it in my face.
Jumping back, I yelled out, “Gross! You peed on that thing!”
“Look! Look! Look!”
Laughing, I shook my head and said, “I can see it from here. It for sure says you’re pregnant.”
For one brief moment, jealousy raced through my veins before I quickly got it under control. “Does Colt know?”
She wrapped her arms around her body and shook her head. “No. I didn't even tell him I was suspecting it.”
“Have you been trying?”
“No. I started feeling kind of tired lately and when I didn’t get my period, I got curious.”
I took her hand in mine. “I take it this news makes you happy, then?”
Pressing her lips together, she nodded as more tears rolled down her face. “Colt?”
“I . . . I think he’s going to be happy. We hadn’t planned on kids this soon, but I swear to God there is something in the water here!”
Laughing, I pulled my best friend into my arms. “Remind me to drink bottled water.”
Lauren gasped and pulled back. “What? Are you having sex? With who? Why haven’t you told me?”
I held up my hands. “Whoa. Settle down, girl. I’m not having sex.”
Lauren frowned. “Well, that sucks.”
“Yeah, I kind of liked it the one and only time I tried it. It would be nice to experience it again.”
Lauren hooked her arm in mine as we made our way to her kitchen. As we walked through the house, I couldn’t help but smile. Everything about the house screamed Lauren. It was decorated in a French country theme, like something straight out of a home and garden book.
Walking into the kitchen, I looked around. “Did you paint your cabinets?”
Lauren glanced over her shoulder and stared at me. “No. They’ve always been this color.”
“Huh. Well did you do something different in here?”
She placed two glasses on the counter and pulled out the orange juice as she looked around the kitchen. “Nope. Nothing’s changed.”
With a frown, I brushed it off.
“Okay, so talk to me. I thought you had a date last night. No go?”
“Oh, it was a go. I mean he certainly thought it was a full on green light.”
With a giggle, Lauren took a sip of the orange juice and then sat on a stool at the kitchen island. “Do tell.”
Chewing on the corner of my lip, I replied, “There’s really nothing to tell. David is a nice guy, cute, a good sense of humor, kisses okay.”
“But . . .”
“But nothing. He’s just not . . . he’s not . . .”
“Jase?”
With a frustrated sigh, I mumbled. “Oh, not you too.”
“Okay, well help me understand why you didn’t have sex with this nice, cute, good sense of humor, good kisser.”
“Because I’m not about to jump into bed with every guy I date.”
Lauren grinned. “And . . .”
With a roll of my eyes, I huffed. “And he moved too fast. I mean, he had his hand up my dress before they served dessert.”
With a snicker, Lauren shook her head. “Damn . . . well, you can’t blame him. Look at you. What guy wouldn’t want to stick his hand up your dress?”
With a weak smile, I looked away.
Jase.
“Change of subject. How’s work?”
Ugh. That subject isn’t any better. “It’s okay. My grandfather is driving me crazy, and if my grandmother tries to set me up with one more guy, I may have to leave my job.”
Lauren perked up. “Seriously? Because if you’re serious, I could really use your help here.”
I chuckled. “Oh, right. Like you could use a financial analyst on the payroll of your breeding business.”
The smile that spread across Lauren’s face caused my breathing to hitch. “You’re serious?”
Lifting the glass to her lips, she finished off her juice and set it down on the counter. “I’ve never been more serious in my entire
life.”
Jase
“Damn, dude, you never want to do anything anymore. What happened to you?”
Pulling the hay bale off the trailer, I wiped the sweat off my face. “What do you mean what happened to me?”
Rick lifted his hat and wiped his forehead. “I’m just saying, before you went off to Paris last summer you were fun. Now you’re a stick in the mud.”
“I’m not a stick in the mud.”
The smell of the hay caused me to take in a deep breath. Something about that smell brought back memories of following my father and Reed around the ranch, trying to be just like them.
“You never want to go out. You never want to hook up with anyone either. When was the last time you got some pussy?”
With a roll of my eyes, I shook my head. “Nice, Rick.”
He pointed his finger at me and shouted, “See! Like that. The old Jase wouldn’t have cared less if I had said the word pussy or not.”
“I don’t care if you say pussy.” I shrugged and grabbed another bale. “I’m not in the mood to date any of these girls we grew up with. All the good ones left and moved on with their lives.”
“Damn. The good ones?”
“You know what I mean.”
We worked for a few minutes in silence and I enjoyed every second of it, until he started talking again.
“You remember Jill Gates?”
“I should hope so. I dated her senior year and took her to prom.”
Rick laughed as he unloaded another bale of hay and stacked it in the barn. “Yeah well, she’s back in Llano.”
“I thought she moved to Oregon or something.”
“Washington.”
“She didn’t like the rain?” I asked with a smirk.
Rick shook his head. “She didn’t like that her fiancé was sleeping around. My mom said she decided to come back and work for the elementary school. She’s a teacher.”
“Huh. I bet she hates that. All she ever talked about was leaving Llano.”
“Well, she’s back and rumor has it . . . she was asking about you.”
I stopped and looked at him. “Me, huh?”