Andrew looked unhappy.
I glanced at the kitchen clock. It was only 3:20.
“It is not my homework time yet,” I said. “I do not start my homework until four. And besides, today is Friday. I do not have to do my homework until Sunday.” (I did not mention that my schedule did not allow for homework on Sunday.)
“Why wait until four?” asked Mrs. Hamilton. “If you begin now, you will be finished sooner. Then you can relax all weekend. So hop to it!” She gave me a toothy smile. “Come along, Andrew.”
I took my social studies book out of my backpack. I turned to the chapter I should have read earlier in the week. It was all about Ellis Island. There was a picture of the Statue of Liberty (not the Empire State Building).
My goodness, was Mrs. Hamilton ever no-nonsense! Having her for a nanny would be like being in the army. I could tell she believed in rules, rules, rules. There was no way I would ever want …
Hmmm. Wait a second. Mrs. Hamilton was very firm, it was true. But so was my schedule. Mrs. Hamilton seemed like the kind of person who would appreciate someone like me, who lived on a strict schedule. If I explained to her how my schedule worked …
Ring, ring.
I heard Mrs. Hamilton pick up the telephone in the living room.
“Mrs. Engle is not available right now,” she said. “I see. Karen’s teacher. I will tell Mrs. Engle you called, Ms. Colman.”
Mrs. Hamilton poked her head around into the kitchen. “That was your teacher, Karen. It seems she wishes to speak with your mother.”
Mrs. Hamilton gave me a meaningful look, and I knew what the meaning was: I bet you need to straighten up at school.
Wonders Never Cease
“I hated her,” said Andrew. “She was awful. She was terrible. She was the worst.”
Seth passed me the mashed potatoes, and I plopped a big mound on my plate. We were eating dinner and talking about Mrs. Hamilton.
“Well, I guess we know how Andrew feels about Mrs. Hamilton,” he said. “Karen? How do you feel?”
“Hmm,” I said thoughtfully. Mrs. Hamilton had been kind of yucky. On the other hand, I still thought she was someone who might be open to the idea of my schedule. “I did not think she was so bad.”
“What?” Andrew almost fell out of his chair. “She was like Cruella DeVil, Ursula the Sea Witch, and the Wicked Witch of the West all rolled into one! Only meaner!”
“She was not that mean,” I said. “Okay, she was a little strict. But that is not necessarily a bad thing.”
“I will remember you said that next time you break a house rule,” Mommy said, smiling. “But seriously, Karen, you actually liked her?” I could tell that Mommy was surprised.
“Maybe ‘like’ is a bit strong,” I admitted. “But I did not hate her.”
Mommy shook her head. “Will wonders never cease?” she muttered. “Karen, you amaze me sometimes. I was certain you would say you did not like Mrs. Hamilton. You and she did not seem to get along. She said you were a — how did she put it? — ‘a headstrong, obstinate child.’ ”
I shrugged. Whatever that meant.
“I think perhaps Mrs. Hamilton would be happier nannying other children,” Seth observed. “For her own good, we should not offer her the job.”
“Great,” said Andrew. “Thank you!”
“Hmph,” I said.
“I agree, Seth,” said Mommy. “Since Andrew did not like Mrs. Hamilton, she is not the nanny for us. Remember, we must all agree on a nanny. We will have to keep looking.”
“Maybe the next candidate will be the one,” said Seth.
“I hope so,” said Mommy. She turned to Andrew and me. “I was sure you two would agree on a nanny. But Andrew liked Rose and Karen did not. And Karen liked Mrs. Hamilton and Andrew did not. I am wondering whether we will be able to find a nanny who will please everyone.”
I felt bad for Mommy. One of her New Year’s resolutions was to find us the perfect nanny. Now she was beginning to doubt whether that was possible.
Soon dinner was over. Seth started to clear the table, and I offered to help him.
“Why, thank you, Karen,” said Seth.
“Mrs. Hamilton told me that Ms. Colman called this afternoon,” said Mommy. “I think I will return her call now. Do you know what she wanted, Karen?”
“Um,” I muttered.
“Probably to tell you about some PTA meeting or something,” said Seth.
“Um,” I said again. Uh-oh. I did not want to be around when Mommy talked to Ms. Colman.
I checked the time. Five minutes to seven. Close enough.
“Seth, I just remembered I have something very important I have to do in my room right now,” I said. “Sorry. I will help you some other time.”
I ran to my room as quickly as I could and closed the door behind me. I put the Lemon Drops on the CD player, as I did every evening at seven o’clock.
The first, annoying notes of “It’s a Grrl’s Wrrld” filled the room. I gritted my teeth. I could not bring myself to dance around my room.
I had listened to the Lemon Drops every single day, and I had grown to hate them.
Karen’s Confession
The Lemon Drops were singing “2gether 4ever” (that is the way it is spelled) when I heard a knock on my door.
“Karen?” Mommy called. “May I come in?”
“Yes, Mommy,” I said.
Mommy sat on my bed.
I turned off the Lemon Drops and sat next to her with my hands folded in my lap. I could not look at her.
“I spoke to Ms. Colman,” Mommy said gently. “She is concerned about you. She said you have not been yourself at school lately. She said you have been disruptive. That you do not seem to know what is going on in class. And that you have not been doing your homework. Is this true, Karen?”
It was true. Suddenly, I realized that Ms. Colman and Hannie and Nancy were right. I had changed — and not for the better. Because of my resolution not to change, everything was a mess. My life had become a disaster.
I tried to say, “Yes, Mommy,” but I could not. I felt as if a huge ball of sticky gum were in my throat. My eyes were watering, and my glasses were beginning to mist up.
Finally I nodded my head yes, and a tear slid down my nose. It hung on the tip, and then fell onto my hand.
That did it. I burst into tears and buried my head in Mommy’s side. (I know it was a little babyish, but I was very upset.)
“Okay,” said Mommy. She stroked my hair. “It is okay.”
I sobbed for awhile. It felt as if I had been holding the tears in for a long time. Crying was a great relief.
“Please tell me what has been going on,” Mommy whispered.
I nodded and wiped away my tears. I was dying to tell someone. I could not tell Hannie or Nancy. I could not tell Ms. Colman. But I have always been able to tell Mommy everything.
“Do you remember how we all made New Year’s resolutions?” I began.
“Yes, I remember,” said Mommy. “Seth resolved to get more exercise. Andrew resolved to eat more cake and ice cream. And I resolved to find us a nanny and read Shakespeare.”
“Right,” I said. “And I noticed that none of your resolutions seemed to be working. So I decided to keep mine secret.”
“And what was your resolution?” Mommy asked.
“Well, everything kept changing,” I said. “I went to Chicago, then I came back. You and Seth and Andrew stayed there for awhile. Then you came back too. I was at the big house for months and months. Now I am at the little house again. The big house got a new cat, and then Boo-Boo died. I found out I was getting a nanny at the little house. It was too much change. Everything kept changing! So I resolved not to change in any way. To keep everything the same as much as possible.”
There. Now Mommy knew how all my problems began. I waited for her to tell me she understood.
“I am afraid I do not understand, Karen,” said Mommy. “What does this have to do with your trouble
at school?”
So I explained how I had set up a schedule for myself. I showed her the schedule. (She seemed very impressed.)
I told her about how I laid out my clothes at the beginning of each week, and how I always wore my hair the same way, and how I always ate the exact same breakfast in the morning, lunch at noon, and snack in the afternoon. Mommy nodded thoughtfully.
I told her about always lining up behind Bobby, and about raising my hand for every other question. I explained how, even though I tried, I had not been able to do any homework in weeks.
I told Mommy about how I had thought that not changing would make me more responsible. But I had ended up being less responsible than ever.
It took a long time to explain. Who would have thought that one little resolution could get so complicated?
“And the worst part,” I finished, “is that I cannot change back to the way I used to be. My resolution was to not change at all! I am stuck this way! Forever!” I burst into tears again.
The New New Year’s Resolution
“I think I know now why you did not like Rose and did like Mrs. Hamilton,” said Mommy. “Having Rose around would have made sticking to a schedule difficult, right?”
I nodded.
“And Mrs. Hamilton would have liked the idea of a strict schedule,” Mommy said. “Right?”
I nodded again.
“Oh, Karen,” said Mommy. She hugged me close. It felt great. “I understand how you feel — about too much change in your life. Sometimes I feel the same way.”
“You do?” I asked. Gee. It never occurred to me that Mommy might feel that way also.
“Yes, I do,” said Mommy. “And I have not been looking forward to the changes the new nanny will bring in all of our lives. I really like taking care of you and Andrew myself. I like us to have a lot of time together. And I do not really like the idea that I have to share you with a stranger. But although it will be difficult, in the end, I think it is the best thing for us as a family. I will be very happy working at my new job. And we will have a little more money, which will make things easier. But I cannot feel good about having a nanny unless you and Andrew are happy and comfortable with her. That is why it is especially important to me to find the perfect nanny.”
“I understand,” I said. “I would like to have the perfect nanny too.”
“I have an idea,” said Mommy. “Maybe it is not too late to change your New Year’s resolution. After all, it is still January.”
“Yes, but I told you, I resolved not to change,” I reminded her. “Changing my New Year’s resolution would be the biggest change of all.”
“Maybe not,” said Mommy. “Look at it this way: If you change your resolution about not changing, that breaks your resolution only once. If you stick with your resolution about not changing, every little change you make will break your resolution.”
“Hmmm,” I said. “You have a point.” I thought about it some more. The more I thought about it, the more it seemed like a good idea. I had to do something. “Okay,” I said. “I will change my resolution to something new. But what should it be?”
“I suggest you help me with my resolution,” said Mommy.
“But I am too young for Shakespeare!” I exclaimed.
Mommy laughed. “No, silly,” she said. “I want you to resolve to help find the family the best nanny ever. Do you think you can do that?”
I tapped my finger against my chin. “Yes, I guess so,” I said. “That will be my new New Year’s resolution. I will help find us a Mary Poppins of our own.”
“Great,” said Mommy, hugging me. “You know, not all change is bad, Karen. We need a little change every now and then, to keep us fresh.”
“I know,” I said. I hugged her back. “Just not all the time.”
“Right,” said Mommy. She stood up. “Well, I am glad we have solved this problem. And I hope things will get back to normal at school.”
“They will,” I said.
“Good,” said Mommy as she went out the door.
Mommy was right. A little change was good. I knew that. I could see that I had gone overboard, trying to stop all change. From now on I would try to deal with changes as they came.
Except for one thing.
For some reason, I still did not want to have to get used to a new style of peanut butter ever again. Going from crunchy to smooth was what had started this whole thing. Now that I was used to smooth, there was no way I was going back. It was smooth or nothing.
I promised myself that.
Many Apologies
Monday was a big day for me. It was also a very good day.
For the first time in weeks, my clothes were perfect for the weather. Plus, they matched. I wore black leggings and my yellow taxi sweater. I pulled my hair back in the center, not on the side, and wore a matching yellow scrunchie. I felt great!
On the playground before class, I found Hannie and Nancy. They were playing hopscotch. I waited till Hannie had finished hopping to eight and back. Then I said, “I am sorry I have not been much fun lately.”
Hannie and Nancy glanced at each other. Nancy said, “We do not understand what is going on. You have been cutting in line. You have been grumpy. And you looked so … strange. What is happening with you?”
I told them about my first New Year’s resolution. I explained how, instead of making my life better, it only made it harder. And when my life is hard, I am hard to be around.
“But I decided to change my resolution,” I said.
“Thank goodness!” said Hannie and Nancy. They both gave me big hugs. I hugged them back.
We were the Three Musketeers again! All for one and one for all!
Next I found Addie. She was playing wall-ball with Ian. Wall-ball is a cross between Ping-Pong and baseball. Addie is very good at it. (She was beating Ian, seventeen to six.)
“Ian, may I speak with Addie alone for a minute?” I asked him. (I sounded very grown-up and important.)
“Um, sure,” said Ian. He practiced tossing the ball against the wall while Addie rolled her chair after me.
“What do you want, Karen?” Addie asked. I could tell she was still mad at me.
“I want to apologize,” I said. “I have been a lousy planet partner. But I will make it up to you.” I did not think Addie needed to know about the New Year’s resolution, so I did not tell her. “Last night I read three chapters of a book about Jupiter. I took notes. I have been thinking about our report.”
“Really?” asked Addie. “It is due on Friday. Do you think we will be able to finish it?”
“Absolutely,” I said. “You will see. I will work hard on Project Jupiter. I promise.”
Addie nodded. “Okay,” she said. “Now I have to get back to my game.” She whispered to me, “Four more points and I will have beaten Ian five times in a row.”
I giggled. “You go, girl.”
Next I found Bobby. He, Hank, Ricky, the Barkan twins, and Sara were playing tag. Bobby was not happy when I dragged him away from the game.
“What is it?” he demanded.
“I am sorry,” I said.
“For what?” Bobby asked.
“I am sorry for cutting in line behind you all the time for the last two weeks.” I knew that I should really apologize to all the kids I had cut in front of. But that was too complicated. Apologizing to Bobby would have to cover it.
“What are you talking about?” Bobby said. He looked at me as if he thought I were a loony.
“Never mind,” I said. “Just tell me you accept my apology.”
“Fine,” he said. “Okay. Can I go back to my game now?”
I nodded. Bobby ran back to the tag game, shaking his head.
Three down, one to go. But the last one would be the hardest of all. I went inside to our classroom. Ms. Colman was at her desk, looking at some papers.
“Ms. Colman?” I said.
“Karen,” said Ms. Colman. “Come in. What can I do for you?”
&n
bsp; I stepped into the classroom. “I wanted to say I was sorry,” I said. “I did not mean to cause problems in class, or to let Addie down. But that is what happened, and I am sorry it did. I will not let it happen again.”
Ms. Colman smiled. “I believe you will not,” she said. “I am glad you are your old self again. I missed you.”
“Thank you. I am glad too,” I said. And I meant it.
Two Projects
Now that I did not have a schedule telling me what to do at every moment of the day, I was able to tackle Project Jupiter.
After school Mommy drove me to the library. I checked out three more books on the planets.
All afternoon I read Jupiter books. There was a lot of interesting information in them. For instance, Jupiter is 88,640 miles around its middle. (Earth is only 7,920 miles around.) I had not known that before.
After dinner Seth helped me surf the Internet. Just before bedtime we found NASA’s Web site. I did not have time to look through it, but I wrote down the URL (that is the Internet address). I would come back to it later.
Project Jupiter had finally taken off!
The next day I went to work on Project Nanny. I wanted to help Mommy find the best nanny ever. I had found such good information about Jupiter on the Internet, I thought I would try it for nannies too.
Boy, was I disappointed. Seth helped me search and search for a Web site listing perfect nannies, but I could not find anything.
Then Mommy suggested I try the library and the video store.
“Why?” I asked. “Do you think there will be a list of nannies there?”
“No,” she said. “But you could read Mary Poppins and get ideas from it. And we could rent the movie version of Mary Poppins. It was one of my favorites when I was your age.”
I checked Mary Poppins out of the library and started reading it to Andrew. (I am an excellent reader-alouder.) It was very funny. Andrew and I loved it.
We also rented Mary Poppins. The lady from The Sound of Music was in it (I had seen that on TV once). The boy and girl in Mary Poppins reminded Andrew and me of ourselves. They needed the perfect nanny, just like we did. Mary Poppins got four thumbs-up from Andrew and me.