The kitchen was dark. The trees were black on the sky. Dan came waddling out from under the steps and chewed my ankle. I went around the kitchen, where the moon was. Dan came scuffling along, into the moon.
“Benjy.” T. P. said in the house.
The flower tree by the parlor window wasn’t dark, but the thick trees were. The grass was buzzing in the moonlight where my shadow walked on the grass.
“You, Benjy.” T. P. said in the house. “Where you hiding. You slipping off. I knows it.”
Luster came back. Wait, he said. Here. Dont go over there. Miss Quentin and her beau in the swing yonder. You come on this way. Come back here, Benjy.
It was dark under the trees. Dan wouldn’t come. He stayed in the moonlight. Then I could see the swing and I began to cry.
Come away from there, Benjy, Luster said. You know Miss Quentin going to get mad.
It was two now, and then one in the swing. Caddy came fast, white in the darkness.
“Benjy.” she said. “How did you slip out. Where’s Versh.”
She put her arms around me and I hushed and held to her dress and tried to pull her away.
“Why, Benjy.” she said. “What is it. T. P.” she called.
The one in the swing got up and came, and I cried and pulled Caddy’s dress.
“Benjy.” Caddy said. “It’s just Charlie. Dont you know Charlie.”
“Where’s his nigger.” Charlie said. “What do they let him run around loose for.”
“Hush, Benjy.” Caddy said. “Go away, Charlie. He doesn’t like you.” Charlie went away and I hushed. I pulled at Caddy’s dress.
“Why, Benjy.” Caddy said. “Aren’t you going to let me stay here and talk to Charlie a while.”
“Call that nigger.” Charlie said. He came back. I cried louder and pulled at Caddy’s dress.
“Go away, Charlie.” Caddy said. Charlie came and put his hands on Caddy and I cried more. I cried loud.
“No, no.” Caddy said. “No. No.”
“He cant talk.” Charlie said. “Caddy.”
“Are you crazy.” Caddy said. She began to breathe fast. “He can see. Dont. Dont.” Caddy fought. They both breathed fast. “Please. Please.” Caddy whispered.
“Send him away.” Charlie said.
“I will.” Caddy said. “Let me go.”
“Will you send him away.” Charlie said.
“Yes.” Caddy said. “Let me go.” Charlie went away. “Hush.” Caddy said. “He’s gone.” I hushed. I could hear her and feel her chest going.
“I’ll have to take him to the house.” she said. She took my hand. “I’m coming.” she whispered.
“Wait.” Charlie said. “Call the nigger.”
“No.” Caddy said. “I’ll come back. Come on, Benjy.”
“Caddy.” Charlie whispered, loud. We went on. “You better come back. Are you coming back.” Caddy and I were running. “Caddy.” Charlie said. We ran out into the moonlight, toward the kitchen.
“Caddy.” Charlie said.
Caddy and I ran. We ran up the kitchen steps, onto the porch, and Caddy knelt down in the dark and held me. I could hear her and feel her chest. “I wont.” she said. “I wont anymore, ever. Benjy. Benjy.” Then she was crying, and I cried, and we held each other. “Hush.” she said. “Hush. I wont anymore.” So I hushed and Caddy got up and we went into the kitchen and turned the light on and Caddy took the kitchen soap and washed her mouth at the sink, hard. Caddy smelled like trees.
I kept a telling you to stay away from there, Luster said. They sat up in the swing, quick. Quentin had her hands on her hair. He had a red tie.
You old crazy loon, Quentin said. I’m going to tell Dilsey about the way you let him follow everywhere I go. I’m going to make her whip you good.
“I couldn’t stop him.” Luster said. “Come on here, Benjy.”
“Yes you could.” Quentin said. “You didn’t try. You were both snooping around after me. Did Grandmother send you all out here to spy on me.” She jumped out of the swing. “If you dont take him right away this minute and keep him away, I’m going to make Jason whip you.”
“I cant do nothing with him.” Luster said. “You try it if you think you can.”
“Shut your mouth.” Quentin said. “Are you going to get him away.”
“Ah, let him stay.” he said. He had a red tie. The sun was red on it. “Look here, Jack.” He struck a match and put it in his mouth. Then he took the match out of his mouth. It was still burning. “Want to try it.” he said. I went over there. “Open your mouth.” he said. I opened my mouth. Quentin hit the match with her hand and it went away.
“Goddam you.” Quentin said. “Do you want to get him started. Dont you know he’ll beller all day. I’m going to tell Dilsey on you.” She went away running.
“Here, kid.” he said. “Hey. Come on back. I aint going to fool with him.”
Quentin ran on to the house. She went around the kitchen.
“You played hell then, Jack.” he said. “Aint you.”
“He cant tell what you saying.” Luster said. “He deef and dumb.”
“Is.” he said. “How long’s he been that way.”
“Been that way thirty three years today.” Luster said. “Born looney. Is you one of them show folks.”
“Why.” he said,
“I dont ricklick seeing you around here before.” Luster said.
“Well, what about it.” he said.
“Nothing.” Luster said. “I going tonight.”
He looked at me.
“You aint the one can play a tune on that saw, is you.” Luster said.
“It’ll cost you a quarter to find that out.” he said. He looked at me. “Why dont they lock him up.” he said. “What’d you bring him out here for.”
“You aint talking to me.” Luster said. “I cant do nothing with him. I just come over here looking for a quarter I lost so I can go to the show tonight. Look like now I aint going to get to go.” Luster looked on the ground. “You aint got no extra quarter, is you.” Luster said.
“No.” he said. “I aint.”
“I reckon I just have to find that other one, then.” Luster said. He put his hand in his pocket. “You dont want to buy no golf ball neither, does you.” Luster said.
“What kind of ball.” he said.
“Golf ball.” Luster said. “I dont want but a quarter.”
“What for.” he said. “What do I want with it.”
“I didn’t think you did.” Luster said. “Come on here, mulehead.” he said. “Come on here and watch them knocking that ball. Here. Here something you can play with along with that jimson weed.” Luster picked it up and gave it to me. It was bright.
“Where’d you get that.” he said. His tie was red in the sun, walking.
“Found it under this here bush.” Luster said. “I thought for a minute it was that quarter I lost.”
He came and took it.
“Hush.” Luster said. “He going to give it back when he done looking at it.”
“Agnes Mabel Becky.” he said. He looked toward the house.
“Hush.” Luster said. “He fixing to give it back.”
He gave it to me and I hushed.
“Who come to see her last night.” he said.
“I dont know.” Luster said. “They comes every night she can climb down that tree. I dont keep no track of them.”
“Damn if one of them didn’t leave a track.” he said. He looked at the house. Then he went and lay down in the swing. “Go away.” he said. “Dont bother me.”
“Come on here.” Luster said. “You done played hell now. Time Miss Quentin get done telling on you.”
We went to the fence and looked through the curling flower spaces. Luster hunted in the grass.
“I had it right here.” he said. I saw the flag flapping, and the sun slanting on the broad grass.
“They’ll be some along soon.” Luster said. “There some now, but they going away. Come on a
nd help me look for it.”
We went along the fence.
“Hush.” Luster said. “How can I make them come over here, if they aint coming. Wait. They’ll be some in a minute. Look yonder. Here they come.”
I went along the fence, to the gate, where the girls passed with their booksatchels. “You, Benjy.” Luster said. “Come back here.”
You cant do no good looking through the gate, T. P. said. Miss Caddy done gone long ways away. Done got married and left you. You cant do no good, holding to the gate and crying. She cant hear you.
What is it he wants, T. P. Mother said. Cant you play with him and keep him quiet.
He want to go down yonder and look through the gate, T. P. said.
Well, he cannot do it, Mother said. It’s raining. You will just have to play with him and keep him quiet. You, Benjamin.
Aint nothing going to quiet him, T. P. said. He think if he down to the gate, Miss Caddy come back.
Nonsense, Mother said.
I could hear them talking. I went out the door and I couldn’t hear them, and I went down to the gate, where the girls passed with their booksatchels. They looked at me, walking fast, with their heads turned. I tried to say, but they went on, and I went along the fence, trying to say, and they went faster. Then they were running and I came to the corner of the fence and I couldn’t go any further, and I held to the fence, looking after them and trying to say.
“You, Benjy.” T. P. said. “What you doing, slipping out. Dont you know Dilsey whip you.”
“You cant do no good, moaning and slobbering through the fence.” T. P. said. “You done skeered them chillen. Look at them, walking on the other side of the street.”
How did he get out, Father said. Did you leave the gate unlatched when you came in, Jason.
Of course not, Jason said. Dont you know I’ve got better sense than to do that. Do you think I wanted anything like this to happen. This family is bad enough, God knows. I could have told you, all the time. I reckon you’ll send him to Jackson, now. If Mr Burgess dont shoot him first.
Hush, Father said.
I could have told you, all the time, Jason said.
It was open when I touched it, and I held to it in the twilight. I wasn’t crying, and I tried to stop, watching the girls coming along in the twilight. I wasn’t crying.
“There he is.”
They stopped.
“He cant get out. He wont hurt anybody, anyway. Come on.”
“I’m scared to. I’m scared. I’m going to cross the street.”
“He cant get out.”
I wasn’t crying.
“Dont be a fraid cat. Come on.”
They came on in the twilight. I wasn’t crying, and I held to the gate. They came slow.
“I’m scared.”
“He wont hurt you. I pass here every day. He just runs along the fence.”
They came on. I opened the gate and they stopped, turning. I was trying to say, and I caught her, trying to say, and she screamed and I was trying to say and trying and the bright shapes began to stop and I tried to get out. I tried to get it off of my face, but the bright shapes were going again. They were going up the hill to where it fell away and I tried to cry. But when I breathed in, I couldn’t breathe out again to cry, and I tried to keep from falling off the hill and I fell off the hill into the bright, whirling shapes.
Here, looney, Luster said. Here come some. Hush your slobbering and moaning, now.
They came to the flag. He took it out and they hit, then he put the flag back.
“Mister.” Luster said.
He looked around. “What.” he said.
“Want to buy a golf ball.” Luster said.
“Let’s see it.” he said. He came to the fence and Luster reached the ball through.
“Where’d you get it.” he said.
“Found it.” Luster said.
“I know that.” he said. “Where. In somebody’s golf bag.”
“I found it laying over here in the yard.” Luster said. “I’ll take a quarter for it.”
“What makes you think it’s yours.” he said.
“I found it.” Luster said.
“Then find yourself another one.” he said. He put it in his pocket and went away.
“I got to go to that show tonight.” Luster said.
“That so.” he said. He went to the table. “Fore caddie.” he said. He hit.
“I’ll declare.” Luster said. “You fusses when you dont see them and you fusses when you does. Why cant you hush. Dont you reckon folks gets tired of listening to you all the time. Here. You dropped your jimson weed.” He picked it up and gave it back to me. “You needs a new one. You bout wore that one out.” We stood at the fence and watched them.
“That white man hard to get along with.” Luster said. “You see him take my ball.” They went on. We went on along the fence. We came to the garden and we couldn’t go any further. I held to the fence and looked through the flower spaces. They went away.
“Now you aint got nothing to moan about.” Luster said. “Hush up. I the one got something to moan over, you aint. Here. Whyn’t you hold on to that weed. You be bellering about it next.” He gave me the flower. “Where you heading now.”
Our shadows were on the grass. They got to the trees before we did. Mine got there first. Then we got there, and then the shadows were gone. There was a flower in the bottle. I put the other flower in it.
“Aint you a grown man, now.” Luster said. “Playing with two weeds in a bottle. You know what they going to do with you when Miss Cahline die. They going to send you to Jackson, where you belong. Mr Jason say so. Where you can hold the bars all day long with the rest of the looneys and slobber. How you like that.”
Luster knocked the flowers over with his hand. “That’s what they’ll do to you at Jackson when you starts bellering.”
I tried to pick up the flowers. Luster picked them up, and they went away. I began to cry.
“Beller.” Luster said. “Beller. You want something to beller about. All right, then. Caddy.” he whispered. “Caddy. Beller now. Caddy.”
“Luster.” Dilsey said from the kitchen.
The flowers came back.
“Hush.” Luster said. “Here they is. Look. It’s fixed back just like it was at first. Hush, now.”
“You, Luster.” Dilsey said.
“Yessum.” Luster said. “We coming. You done played hell. Get up.” He jerked my arm and I got up. We went out of the trees. Our shadows were gone.
“Hush.” Luster said. “Look at all them folks watching you. Hush.”
“You bring him on here.” Dilsey said. She came down the steps.
“What you done to him now.” she said.
“Aint done nothing to him.” Luster said. “He just started bellering.”
“Yes you is.” Dilsey said. “You done something to him. Where you been.”
“Over yonder under them cedars.” Luster said.
“Getting Quentin all riled up.” Dilsey said. “Why cant you keep him away from her. Dont you know she dont like him where she at.”
“Got as much time for him as I is.” Luster said. “He aint none of my uncle.”
“Dont you sass me, nigger boy.” Dilsey said.
“I aint done nothing to him.” Luster said. “He was playing there, and all of a sudden he started bellering.”
“Is you been projecking with his graveyard.” Dilsey said.
“I aint touched his graveyard.” Luster said.
“Dont lie to me, boy.” Dilsey said. We went up the steps and into the kitchen. Dilsey opened the firedoor and drew a chair up in front of it and I sat down. I hushed.
What you want to get her started for, Dilsey said. Whyn’t you keep him out of there.
He was just looking at the fire, Caddy said. Mother was telling him his new name. We didn’t mean to get her started.
I knows you didn’t, Dilsey said. Him at one end of the house and her at the other. You let
my things alone, now. Dont you touch nothing till I get back.
“Aint you shamed of yourself.” Dilsey said. “Teasing him.” She set the cake on the table.
“I aint been teasing him.” Luster said. “He was playing with that bottle full of dogfennel and all of a sudden he started up bellering. You heard him.”
“You aint done nothing to his flowers.” Dilsey said.
“I aint touched his graveyard.” Luster said. “What I want with his truck. I was just hunting for that quarter.”
“You lost it, did you.” Dilsey said. She lit the candles on the cake. Some of them were little ones. Some were big ones cut into little pieces. “I told you to go put it away. Now I reckon you want me to get you another one from Frony.”
“I got to go to that show, Benjy or no Benjy.” Luster said. “I aint going to follow him around day and night both.”
“You going to do just what he want you to, nigger boy.” Dilsey said. “You hear me.”
“Aint I always done it.” Luster said. “Dont I always does what he wants. Dont I, Benjy.”
“Then you keep it up.” Dilsey said. “Bringing him in here, bawling and getting her started too. You all go ahead and eat this cake, now, before Jason come. I dont want him jumping on me about a cake I bought with my own money. Me baking a cake here, with him counting every egg that comes into this kitchen. See can you let him alone now, less you dont want to go to that show tonight.”
Dilsey went away.
“You cant blow out no candles.” Luster said. “Watch me blow them out.” He leaned down and puffed his face. The candles went away. I began to cry. “Hush.” Luster said. “Here. Look at the fire whiles I cuts this cake.”
I could hear the clock, and I could hear Caddy standing behind me, and I could hear the roof. It’s still raining, Caddy said. I hate rain. I hate everything. And then her head came into my lap and she was crying, holding me, and I began to cry. Then I looked at the fire again and the bright, smooth shapes went again. I could hear the clock and the roof and Caddy.
I ate some cake. Luster’s hand came and took another piece. I could hear him eating. I looked at the fire.
A long piece of wire came across my shoulder. It went to the door, and then the fire went away. I began to cry.
“What you howling for now.” Luster said. “Look there.” The fire was there. I hushed. “Cant you set and look at the fire and be quiet like mammy told you.” Luster said. “You ought to be ashamed of yourself. Here. Here’s you some more cake.”