Page 31 of Heaven


  I resolved to put into action his second suggestion.

  By the same author

  NOVELS

  Not a Penny More, Not a Penny Less

  Shall We Tell the President?

  Kane and Abel

  The Prodigal Daughter

  First Among Equals

  A Matter of Honour

  As the Crow Flies

  Honour Among Thieves

  The Fourth Estate

  The Eleventh Commandment

  Sons of Fortune

  SHORT STORIES

  A Quiver Full of Arrows

  A Twist in the Tale

  Twelve Red Herrings

  The Collected Short Stories

  To Cut a Long Story Short

  PLAYS

  Beyond Reasonable Doubt

  Exclusive

  The Accused

  PRISON DIARIES

  Volume One — Belmarsh: Hell

  Volume Two — Wayland: Purgatory

  DAY 725

  MONDAY 21 JULY 2003

  5.09 am

  I had a good night’s sleep and rose early to take a shower. I pack my bags, so that no time will be wasted once the tannoy calls me across to reception.

  I am touched by how many prisoners come to my room this morning, to shake me by the hand and wish me luck. However, it is not true, as one tabloid suggested, that I was given a guard of honour as I left the prison.

  7.00 am

  My last prison breakfast – cornflakes and milk. I can’t help looking at my watch every few minutes.

  8.09 am

  I am called to reception where – no surprise – there is a new bundle of forms to be signed before I can be released.

  At last, my release papers are completed by Mr Swivenbank, and he doesn’t try to hide a grin as he hands over my regulation £40. I place the notes in the charity box on the counter, shake hands with both officers and depart, with the seventh draft of a screenplay, tucked under my arm, and in my pocket a CD of a song that was performed by The Seven Deadly Sins at my farewell party last night. (See overleaf.)

  Will is sitting in my car parked outside the back door, waiting for me. He drives us slowly through the phalanx of journalists who litter both sides of the road. Just as we accelerate away and I think we’ve escaped them, we spot a Sky TV news helicopter hovering above us, as well as three motorbikes with cameramen glued to the back seats, and another five cars behind them, in close pursuit. Will never once exceeded the speed limit on the journey home to Cambridge.

  On arrival back at the Old Vicarage, Mary dashes out to greet me, and I make a short press statement:

  Press Release: Embargoed until midnight, Sunday 20 July 2003

  Statement by Jeffrey Archer

  I want to thank my wife Mary and my sons, William and James, for their unwavering and unstinting support during this unhappy period in my life.

  I should also like to thank the many friends who took the trouble to visit me in prison, as well as countless members of the public who sent letters, cards and gifts.

  I shall not be giving any interviews for the foreseeable future. However, I have accepted an invitation to address the Howard League for Penal Reform’s conference at New College Oxford in September, and several requests to do charity auctions in the run up to Christmas.

  JEFFREY

  (to the tune of ‘Daniel’ by Elton John)

  Jeffrey is leaving today down the lane

  I can see the paparazzi, flashing away in vain;

  Oh, and I can see Jeffrey waving goodbye;

  God, it looks like Jeffrey might have a teardrop in his eye.

  Oh, ooh, Jeffrey our brother, bet you’re glad to be free;

  Now you can tell the world what you think of Narey.

  You did time well, it’s now your time to tell;

  Jeffrey, you’re a star, go on, son, give ‘em hell.

  I have not given an interview to the press, or appeared on radio or television, since.

  During the last year, I have addressed a dozen or so organizations since speaking to the Howard League, including the Disraelian Society, Trinity College Oxford, the Thirty Club, the Hawks club and the Criminal Law Solicitors’ Association.

  I have also conducted twenty charity auctions, raising just over a million pounds, and run the Flora London marathon (5 hrs 26 mins) where I was overtaken by a camel, a phone box, a cake and a girl walking.

  Most of my spare time has been taken up with carrying out research for my next novel – and continuing to work on the screenplay of Mallory: Walking Off the Map.

  Notes

  1 NSC has two blocks, north and south, with about 110 prisoners resident in each.

  2 While tagged, you must remain at home between 7 pm and 7 am.

  3 You cannot escape from an open prison, only abscond. There are no walls, just a car barrier at the entrance and a public footpath at the back. Most prisoners who abscond do so in the first two weeks. Nine out of ten are back behind bars within forty-eight hours.

  4 There are five grades of governor; the top man or woman is known as the governing governor. I still haven’t met one.

  5 Matthew will end up serving five and a half months.

  6 This is only true in D-cats – open prisons.

  7 A two-year period of compulsory service in one of the branches of the armed forces, which ceased to apply for anyone born after 1940.

  8 the door to each inmate’s room has a large glass panel in it, covered in wire mesh. On the outside is a green curtain to stop casual passers-by peering in. However, during the night, prison officers hold back the curtain to check you’re in bed and haven’t absconded.

  9 Mr New banned all mouthwashes from the canteen following a similar incident a year ago. As Storr purchased the bottle at his last prison, Mr New is issuing a new directive, that any new prisoners arriving at NSC with mouthwash will have the bottles confiscated.

  10 The government dropped the bill in March 2004.

  11 I never phone Mary on her mobile because my two-pound phone card is gobbled up in moments.

  12 No suggestion of a scandal at Spring Hill appeared in the national press during the next twelve months.

  13 Because the last prison pays the expense of discharging a prisoner.

  14 See Volume II — Wayland: Purgatory.

  15 In Belmarsh., around 70 per cent of the inmates were black, in Wayland 30 per cent, and currently at NSC we have four black prisoners out of 207. I’m not sure what this proves: possibly there might be more black prisoners involved in violent crime than in fraud.

  16 An inmate who completes a quarter of his sentence and proves to be a model prisoner is eligible for outside work. First he must complete two town visits without incident. The next step is to apply for Community Service Volunteers work (CSV), perhaps in an old people’s home or an Oxfam shop. Once he’s completed a month of CSV without incident, he can move on to a wage-earning job, making perhaps £200-£250 a week. This gives a prisoner the chance to send money back to his wife or partner, and to build up some savings to fall back on once released.

  17 Interesting grammatical error.

  18 Frank flew from LA to London to appear in my trial to deny a statement by Angie Peppiatt that I had been in Rome with a mistress when in fact I had been with Frank attending the World Athletics Championships. Not that I think Mr Justice Potts gave a damn, as by then he had already made up his mind that I was guilty.

  19 Mr and Mrs Barker are now separated. Mrs Barker stood down from the parole board in September 2001.

  20 He was very distressed to learn last year that the Home Office was considering closing the prison.

  21 So-called vanity publishers are only too happy to publish your book – if, along with the script, you enclose a cheque for £3,000.

  22 The prison is entitled to keep you until midnight on the day of your release, but you’re usually off the premises by nine o’clock.

  23 Baroness Nicholson wrote to Sir John Stevens, Commission
er of the Metropolitan Police, in July 2001, demanding ‘an investigation into the involvement of Jeffrey Archer in funds raised and spent through the Simple Truth Appeal’. This precipitated not only a police enquiry, but a lengthy and expensive investigation by KPMG on behalf of the Red Cross. Baroness Nicholson’s insinuation that I had stolen money from the Appeal was irresponsible and wholly without foundation, and on 23 January 2002, the police closed their enquiry ‘in view of … the lack of any evidence from the informant’.

  24 He later wrote to tell me that his old firm took him back the day he was released, and treated the six weeks absence as holiday on full pay.

  25 Caused by the problem of overcrowding.

  26 The analgesic the inmates most commonly ask for is Kapake which is a mixture of paracetamol and codeine. The reason is that codeine will show up in MDT as an opiate, and thus disguise illegal opiates. The user can then protest, ‘But I’m taking Kapake which the doctor prescribed.’ Prison doctors are now trying to limit the use of Kapake and diazepam when a prisoner has a record of taking drugs.

  27 Mr Leighton is unable to make the decision himself. He reports back the following day that the BBC had already been in touch with the Home Office, and they have been turned down.

  28 The full report was published in the Criminal Law Review of August 2003.

  29 I was president of the World Snooker Association until I was arrested, when the board asked me to resign. Two other bodies expelled me, the Royal Society of Arts and the MCC.

  30 Two prisoners absconded during their first week at work. Both were caught and transferred to a B-cat in Nottingham. Two were found in a pub and are back working on the farm; while three were sacked for inappropriate behaviour – unwanted advances to the female staff. And that was in the first week.

  31 Most sex offenders, when housed in an open prison, are given a cover story should anyone ask what they are in for.

  32 They did. It was published in the Sunday Mirror the next day. (See overleaf.)

  33 See map page 414.

  34 I had no idea how important this lunch would turn out to be on the evening I wrote these words.

  35 When I first entered the Liberal Club, an elderly gentlemen remarked, ‘Prison is one thing, Jeff, but the Liberal Club?’

  36 I assume that Mr Beaumont was given Dr Razzak’s advice. If so, he ignored it.

  37 One officer pushes the prisoner’s head down, while another keeps his legs bent; this is known as being ‘bent up’ or ‘twisted up’. In the rule book it’s described as ‘control and restraint’.

  38 I am pleased to learn that David, the friendly schoolmaster at NSC who joined Clive’s company on leaving prison, quickly realized what he was up to, and resigned.

  39 There was a riot the week after I left, and seventeen inmates ended up in hospital.

  40 I wrote this in A Prison Diary Volume One – Belmarsh: Hell, and the Home Office have shown scant interest. There aren’t any votes in prisons.

  41 An area manager is senior to a governor, and can have as many as fifty prisons under his remit. He reports directly to the deputy director-general.

  42 Since Mr Beaumont’s suspension, Mr Hocking has addressed the tribunal, and made it clear that he was forced to resign by Beaumont, with the threat of being sacked. But who bullied Mr Beaumont?

  43 Two years and two prison diaries later, and I have not received one letter of complaint from a prisoner or prison officer about the diaries despite receiving some 16,000 letters in the last three years.

  HEAVEN. Copyright © 2004 by Jeffrey Archer. All rights reserved. For information, address St. Martin’s Press, 175 Fifth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10010.

  www.stmartins.com

  First published in Great Britain by Macmillan

  an imprint of Pan Macmillan Ltd

  eISBN 9781429953832

  First eBook Edition : March 2011

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Archer, Jeffrey, 1940—

  Heaven: a prison diary / Jeffrey Archer. p. cm.

  “Volume 3.”

  ISBN-13: 978-0-312-35479-4

  ISBN-10: 0-312-35479-7

  1. Archer, Jeffrey, 1940—Diaries. 2. Novelists, English—20th century—Diaries. 3. Archer, Jeffrey, 1940—Imprisonment. 4. Prisoners—Great Britain—Diaries. 5. Prisons—Great Britain. 1. Title.

  PR6051.R285Z467 2005

  828’.91403—dc22

  2005042882

  First St. Martin’s Griffin Edition: August 2006

 


 

  Jeffrey Archer, Heaven

  (Series: # )

 

 


 

 
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