“You say that now, but what happens when we’re not home and they’re alone together?” I ask, watching as Daisy runs in and out from between the big dog’s legs then jumps up and down, trying to get him to play with her. “Okay, so maybe they’ll be okay, but I just don’t know.”
“Come here, Sophie.” Nico holds out his hand in my direction. I scoot around the dog before taking his hand so he can pull me onto his lap.
“I think I’m getting too big to sit on your lap,” I tell him.
“Never.” He kisses the side of my head. “Now come here, Goose.”
“Goose?” I repeat quietly, watching the dog come towards us. “What kind of name is Goose?”
“Goose is his name because he’s as white as a goose.”
He is white—pure white, with one black ear, a pink nose, and blue eyes. Nico holds my hand out for him to smell. I have been around Asher and November’s Beast a few times. He’s a nice dog, great with all the kids, and very protective. He’s just so big. I always try to avoid him.
“Relax, babe. He’s a good dog.”
I un-ball my fist, cautiously holding my hand out to him. His cold, wet nose touches my palm, and then his tongue runs over my skin. Daisy jumps on the couch so she can get closer to Goose, and once she’s in front of him, she starts licking his face and barking, trying jump on him. He pushes her out of the way with his head, forcing her to the side so he can lay his head on my lap. His nose goes to my stomach, and I wonder if he smells the babies. Daisy’s still going crazy trying to get his attention, but he just ignores her, pressing himself even closer to me so I’ll pet him.
“The best part is he’s already house broken, and he’s full grown.”
“Where did he come from?” I ask, starting to relax and enjoy the comforting feeling of his big, warm head against me.
“A friend of mine who’s in the military is getting ready to go overseas and can’t take him with him.”
“So we’re going to have to give him back in a couple years?” I wonder out loud, not liking the idea of getting attached to him and then having him taken away in a few years when his owner comes back.
“No, babe. He’s ours permanently,” Nico assures me.
I laugh as he rubs his big head against my stomach, wanting me to pay attention to him. “Okay, so he’s kinda cute,” I finally agree.
“He’s well trained. That’s what’s important.”
“You’re not still worried, are you?” I ask. Since moving, I never even think about what happened at my old house.
“I will be worried until we find out who the person behind what happened to you is.”
“Nothing has happened in forever. Maybe what happened before was a complete coincidence.” I shrug my shoulders, the movement making Goose look up at me with big puppy-dog eyes.
“Maybe, maybe not, I’m not willing to take that chance.”
“So I guess we just got a new dog.” I sigh, finally placing my hands on each side of the giant head nuzzling my belly and stroking his short but surprisingly soft fur.
“Glad you’re seeing things my way.” He smirks.
“I love when you ask me how I feel about something, knowing you’re just going to do whatever you want anyways.” I scratch behind Goose’s ears and giggle when one of his back legs starts to shake.
“When it comes to your safety, I will do what’s necessary.” He kisses the side of my neck, and Daisy decides to jump up on the back of the couch, where she can prop her front paws on Nico’s shoulder and lick both of our faces.
My hormones take over for a moment and my heart swells. “Two fur-babies before our two real babies get here. It’s gonna be a full house.”
*~*~*
I sit down in the glider that was just delivered for the babies’ room and tap my pen on the paper in my lap. I need to reply to my dad’s letter. I’ve been putting it off for a long time, trying to figure out what I want to say, what I really want our relationship to be like, or if I even want a relationship with him at all. The closer my due date gets, the more I think about my babies having their grandfather—not just Nico’s dad, but my dad as well—at least in some capacity. I know it’s what my mother would have wanted. I look down at the paper again, wondering how to even start the letter off. Do I write Dear Dad, or do I write his name? Why does this have to be so difficult?
“Whatcha doing in here?” I look up when I hear Nico’s voice.
“Sorry?” I ask him, lost in the way he looks. His torso is covered in sweat, his tattoos even more pronounced from the sun shining into the room, his body looking bigger than it used to for some reason.
“What are you doing, baby?” he repeats.
“Trying to write my dad,” I mumble out, my eyes locked on the V of his hips. “Did you have a good workout?” I look up when I hear him laugh. “What’s funny?”
“Baby, the look on your face makes me think you didn’t get enough this morning.”
“Sorry.” I smile. I’m not really sorry; my hormones are insane. I want him all the time, but the part that sucks is that we are forced to only use a couple of different positions with how large I have gotten.
“Don’t be sorry. Come shower with me.” He bends over me, his body caging me in with an arm on each side of the chair.
“I really need to write him. I keep putting it off.”
“You can write when you’re ready.”
“I have been ready. I just don’t know what to say. I don’t even know how to address the letter. I mean, do I say, ‘Dear Dad,’ or something else?” I sigh, leaning my head back against the chair.
“What do you feel like addressing him as?”
“Dad… I don’t know.” I close my eyes and then open them when his lips touch my forehead. “He’s my dad, even if he didn’t act like one, but after everything that’s happened…I just don’t know.”
“You address him and talk to him about anything,” he says softly, his words spoken against my skin. “He’ll be happy to hear from you, no matter what you say.” He kisses my forehead again and then my lips before running a finger down my cheek and leaving the room.
I watch the spot he just left for a long moment before putting my pen to the paper for the hundredth time.
Dear Dad,
How are you? This is awkward, and I don’t really know what to say, but as Nico told me once, awkward is okay as long as you don’t feel uncomfortable. I don’t feel uncomfortable. I feel like this is something I have needed to do for a long time. I have thought about your letter a lot since I read it. I have been trying to understand where you were coming from and what you must have been going through after Mom passed away. Now that I have Nico, I can’t imagine him being taken away from me without warning. I pray I never have to go through something like that.
I wish I could say I forgive you for everything, and hopefully, with time, I’ll find a way to do that. I want you to know your grandkids. Nico and I are expecting twins. We don’t know the sexes yet because we want to be surprised when they get here. Everyone has been making bets since we found out we were pregnant. I think they are both girls, but Nico swears they are boys, but I can tell he really wants at least one girl. I know he is going to be a great dad. His family is amazing. His parents are very supportive and loving, and they have accepted me as I am. He has three brothers, and each of them is married and has kids of their own. I hope you don’t think I’m saying these things to upset you. That’s not what this is. Honestly, before Nico, I had Maggie, Devon, and a few other friends, but now my life is full and I’m happy.
Nico also just bought us a beautiful home in the country—a house Mom would have loved. I sometimes sit out on the front porch at sunset and read. I hope when the babies get here I can sit outside and read to them like Mom used to read to me. I wish I had some of the photos of us so I could show them my side of the family when they get older.
Well, I don’t know how to end this letter, but I hope you are okay and that when you read this, i
t brings you some kind of happiness.
XOXO,
Sophie Mayson
I set the letter down on my lap and close my eyes. When they open, I look around the nursery at the light-grey walls Nico and his brothers painted last week. Then I look at the mural of a white tree with silver leaves his mom just painted. My gaze drifts over the two cribs that were added to the room two days ago, with a changing table between them. The room is beautiful and will be perfect for either sex once the babies get here. The room represents so much—not only the start of our family, but also Nico’s family, the love they have for each other, and what it means to have a real family. I smile and stand up, going in search of my husband and praying that I find him before he gets dressed.
Chapter 14
Nico
“Cap’ wants you to start,” Leo says, and I sigh into the phone and look out from the patio into the backyard, where Goose and Daisy are playing. Well, Daisy is playing; Goose is just walking around while Daisy jumps in and out between his feet.
“I can’t, man. I hate leaving Sophie right now. She just reached the eighth-month mark, and the doctor said she could go into labor any time. Her doctor’s appointments have moved to every week. They’re concerned because she’s already begun to dilate.”
“We could really use you right now.”
“I told you before—Sophie’s my priority,” I remind him. When this whole thing started, I told everyone that I’m not going to start working until after the babies are born and I know Sophie will be okay on her own with them.
“I know. I just thought you would relax some after you moved,” he confesses.
“I can’t relax. I still have no clue who was after her or if they still are. Now, with her due date getting closer, I’ve gotten even more nervous. I swear I feel like I’m constantly on edge. I know something’s going to happen. I just don’t know when or how to prepare for it.”
“Has anything happened?”
“No, nothing.” I rub my hand over my face.
“You’re probably just nervous about becoming a dad. When Jenna had Lynn, I was a nervous wreck.”
I’m not nervous about becoming a dad; that’s the one thing I never really worry about. I know that, with Sophie as my kids’ mother, the rest will fall into place. Plus, I have a shitload experience with kids now. I’m not nervous about having my own; I’m ready for that, even knowing how much work it will be.
“How are Jenna and Lynn?” I forgot all about his fiancée and daughter because he never talks about them.
“Jenna is a bitch and Lynn is beautiful.”
“What? I thought you guys were getting married.”
“Yeah, I thought we were getting married too until I found out she was sleeping with her high school sweetheart behind my back,” he growls into the phone.
“Shut the fuck up. She did that?” I knew Jenna had a tendency to act like my old neighbor Deb, but I never imagined her cheating.
“She did. And had been doing it for about six months when I found out.”
“Why didn’t you ever say anything?”
“You mean why didn’t I tell everyone my ex-fiancée was having an affair when she was supposed to be at work? I felt like an idiot, and when I caught on to what was happening, she blamed me and my job, saying I wasn’t around when she needed me.”
“Shit. I’m sorry,” I tell him, rubbing the back of my neck.
“I’m not. I’m glad I found that shit out before I gave her my last name.”
“True, man. How are things with Lynn? She’s what, three now?”
“Perfect. If it wasn’t for her, I would be pissed I wasted so much time on her mother. That’s why I’m tellin’ you Sophie’s safe. You’re just nervous about having not only one, but two kids.”
“It’s not that, man. You’re a cop. You know that feeling you get in your gut when something is off. That’s what I feel. It’s not nerves.” I shake my head.
“You want me to do anything?”
“I don’t think there is anything anyone can do right now. That’s the fucked-up part. I have done all I can to make sure she is safe and that, even if I’m not around, she will be okay.”
“Well, you know if you need me I’m here.”
“Thanks. As soon as I know when I can start, I’ll let you know.”
“Looking forward to it. Everyone’s excited to have Nico Mayson on board. Cap’ wanted me to see about Kenton joining the team too, but I told him that shit was not gonna happen.” He chuckles.
“Yeah, not happening, especially not right now.”
“Why? What’s going on right now?”
“Nothing. Kenton just doesn’t like red tape.”
“Your cousin’s crazy.”
He’s not wrong; Kenton does his own thing and doesn’t like anyone telling him when or how it should be done.
“All right, man. We’ll talk soon.”
“Yeah, man. Talk to you soon.” I hang up, watching Daisy and Goose for a few more minutes before heading inside to check on Sophie. I still have that feeling in my gut, and I have no idea what I’m going to do to get rid of it, but I want it gone before my kids are born.
*~*~*
“Goose, what the fuck?” I yell, chasing him up the stairs to where Sophie is supposed to be taking a nap. The moment I get to the second floor and look down the hall towards our bedroom, I see the giant dog scraping the door, trying to get inside. “What the hell?”
I run to the door, swinging it open. Sophie’s on the floor, her body wrapped around her belly. Her face is red and sweaty, and tears are running down her face onto the hardwood floors.
“Baby.” I get down on my knees in front of her, running a hand over her head.
“Something’s wrong!” she cries out, wrapping herself tighter around her belly.
“Are you having contractions?”
“Yes, but I think there’s something wrong,” she cries harder, her body trembling. My first instinct is to pick her up and get her to the car, but something is off, and I don’t want to make this worse for her.
“I don’t think I should move you,” I tell her, grabbing the phone off the nightstand and dialing 911.
Once the dispatcher answers, I tell her what’s going on. She tells me that I need to check Sophie over, so I lift the bottom of her nightgown up to her waist before helping her onto her back and pulling off her panties. I spread her legs and don’t see the babies, so I take that as a good sign. I tell the woman on the phone that there is no blood or anything else I can see just as I hear sirens outside.
“Oh God!” Sophie screams, shoving her face into my lap, and then, without warning, I feel her teeth sink into the skin of my thigh. I grit my teeth, running a hand down her hair. Whatever pain I’m feeling right now is nothing compared to what she’s feeling.
“I gotta get the door, babe,” I tell her becoming more concerned.
Her face has paled, her breathing is more shallow, and her skin is now cool and damp. She doesn’t say anything, but she whimpers when I stand to leave.
“I’ll be right back. Goose, come.” I point to the floor where Sophie is. He whines, laying his head on top of her arms still wrapped around her waist.
I run down the stairs and throw the door open, not even bothering to make sure they’re following before I run back up the stairs. “My wife is eight months pregnant and was laying down for a nap. I found her on the floor of our room, and she said she’s having contractions, but something’s wrong.”
“We’ll take care of her,” one of the EMTs says.
As soon as we enter the master bedroom, Goose stands up in front of Sophie and growls. I knew he was a good dog before that, but guarding my girl just earned him free rein—especially since he’s the reason I knew something was wrong to begin with.
“Goose.” I point to the floor next to the bed, and he immediately goes there to stand guard. The EMTs hurry over to Sophie. I kneel above her head, putting my lips on her forehead, telling her soft
ly that everything will be okay.
“We need to get her to the hospital,” one of them barks at his coworker.
Everything is such a blur around me that I don’t even have time to think before they’re carrying her downstairs on a gurney. I see my dad’s cruiser pull up as I’m climbing into the back of the ambulance. He nods, letting me know that he will follow as the doors close behind me.
“What’s going on?” I ask when there is a lull in activity.
The one carefully placing an IV in Sophie’s arm looks at me, his face telling me more than I want to know right now. “We’re not sure, but we think one of the babies’ cords is tangled, and she’s going to have to have an emergency C-section as soon as we get to the hospital.”
I look down at Sophie. She’s the most important person in my life. I can’t imagine something happening to her, and that thought alone scares me more than anything else. I nod at the EMT and hold her hand a little tighter, my other hand going to her belly and rubbing it once before closing my eyes. As soon as we arrive at the hospital and get her out of the ambulance, they run us down the hall towards an operating room that I hear a nurse say is already prepped and waiting.
“I’m here, baby. Everything’s going to be okay,” I tell her, seeing her nod as tears begin to form in her eyes.
“It’s going to be okay,” I repeat as the bottom of the gurney she’s on slams through the door ahead of us.
“Sir, I’m sorry, but you’re not allowed past this point,” a small woman wearing scrubs says, wrapping her hand around my arm.
“That’s my wife and kids,” I growl.
“I understand, sir. I’m sorry, but until I get the okay from the doctor, you’re not allowed,” she says calmly.
“Go get the fucking okay from him then. My wife is in there alone. I promised her—” I hear the break in my voice and try to swallow it down. Sophie’s back there by herself and scared, and there is nothing I can do for her.
“As soon as they get her prepped for surgery, I will talk to the doctor. For now, why don’t you come with me and get changed. That way, you’re ready if you’re allowed to be with her.” I immediately follow the nurse into another room, where she hands me a stack of clothes. “Just put these on and I’ll be back in a few minutes,” she says quietly.