“I think this will be the best Christmas ever,” Kate whispered.
“We all got our gifts early this year.” Bran stared down as he watched his sons meet each other for the first time.
“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” Caleb agreed.
Chapter 3
Felix
Dec 21st
“Was that made-for-TV perfect or what! I felt like I was watching a Hallmark Christmas special.” Felix couldn’t seem to stop smiling. Claybourne was driving them back to their home after dropping off the unneeded medical supplies at the clinic. It had been a long time since he was able to celebrate Christmas. This year seemed to be kicking off wonderfully.
“You are a goof. The mother and both babies are healthy, that’s all that matters.” Claybourne yawned. The delivery had taken them into the next morning.
“Why do you think we were ambushed by Rebecca at the clinic? She wasn’t happy until she took our pictures,” Felix said, turning on the radio to a Christmas station. Seconds later in the middle of White Christmas, Claybourne turned the radio off. Felix sighed. His mate had been a huge Ebenezer Scrooge ever since Thanksgiving. If he didn’t know better he would say the man hated Christmas.
“No telling with her. I know that she was relieved to hear that everyone was okay,” Claybourne said, pulling into their driveway.
From the outside you couldn’t tell it was four days until Christmas. There were no lights, no garland. No dancing snowmen or flashing candy canes. Felix had mentioned once and only once that maybe they should get some decorations for the house and that idea had been shot down.
We’ll just have to take it down again in a few weeks, it’s a waste of effort.
Maybe his mate did hate Christmas.
“All I want is to lie down for fourteen hours.” Claybourne parked the car and got out, slamming the car door shut. Frowning, Felix watched as his mate, seemingly forgetting he existed, unlocked the front door, opened it, walked in and closed it behind him.
He crossed his arms and waited, tapping his foot. After ten minutes he came to the realization his mate had truly forgotten him and was probably asleep in bed. He got out of the car and walked to the front door. He turned the knob to discover it had been locked. Staring at the knob in shock he reached for his wallet and pulled out a single key. He unlocked the front door and marched right into the master bedroom. Sure enough, there was his mate in his lounge pants, face down, out like a light.
Motherfucker!
He debated waking his mate up but rejected the idea. His mate had worked hard last night bringing two new souls into the world, and he deserved a rest before he got his ass chewed out, and not in the good way either. Suddenly feeling like a stranger in his own bedroom Felix grabbed the pajamas he had left draped over the chair and walked out.
He headed to the den and sat down on the sofa. He couldn’t get the soul-searing love he had seen between Kate and her mates out of his mind. Had his own mating fizzled already? Would having a child bring back that fire? That need to be with your mate more than you needed your next breath?
He sat cross-legged on their sofa and hugged the pillow to his chest. What could he do to bring back their passion? Maybe Claybourne was simply tolerating him. He couldn’t lose his mate. Not now. He looked around the house and realized that there was nothing of him in any of the rooms. If he packed up all his clothes and left, no one would ever know he had lived here. Disgusted, he threw his pajamas on the sofa beside him and stood up.
Claybourne was his mate and this was his home, dammit! If he wanted to celebrate Christmas, hang mistletoe and dance naked to “Good King Wenceslas” then he was going to. Grabbing the car keys, he headed out the door.
* * * *
“Thanks for the help, Rian, Sebastian,” Felix said, putting the last box of decorations in the car.
“Thanks for taking this stuff off my hands, it doesn’t really go with the feel I’m trying to portray.” Rian waved his hand at the princely way the pride house was decorated. It looked like something out of Better Homes and Gardens.
“I can’t believe you guys didn’t have any decorations.” Sebastian frowned.
“Hey guys, I gotta go check on my baked gingerbread ornaments. If you need any advice just text me a picture,” Rian offered, and ducked back inside.
“That man is a genius when it comes to decorating. Hey, quick question, did Rebecca make you pose for pictures?” Felix asked. Good thing Rian had over-ordered, as that meant more free, high-quality decorations for him. Lucky!
“Yeah, she got most of the pride in the diner this morning, she has been all over town like a tiny camera Nazi,” Sebastian shook, eyeing Felix.
“Is everything okay?” Sebastian asked. Felix looked at his extremely pregnant best friend and decided now would not be the best time to share that he thought his mating was going down the toilet.
“Yup, I’m going to surprise Claybourne with a festive house when he wakes up. Maybe even bake some pie or something,” Felix said. Sebastian’s frown deepened.
“You? You want to bake? Okay, what is going on?” Sebastian demanded, crossing his arms.
“Nothing, just getting into the Christmas spirit,” Felix said cheerfully.
Sebastian smiled, nodded, then jumped up and put Felix in a headlock, raking his knuckles over his friend’s scalp. Not wanting to hurt the baby, Felix didn’t fight back.
“Ow fucker! No fair, you’re totally playing the pregnant card to avoid getting your scrawny ass kicked,” Felix yelled.
“Damn right, bitch. Now spill!” Sebastian said, tightening his grip.
“Fine! I think Claybourne is sick of me and doesn’t care if I’m there or not,” Felix yelled.
Sebastian released Felix and stepped back. “That’s not true. That man loves you to pieces,” Sebastian protested.
“He forgot me. Today he forgot I was even in the car with him. He went into the house, locked the door, changed into his pajamas and went to sleep,” Felix mumbled.
“I am so going to kick his ass,” Sebastian growled.
“Kitten, are you okay?” Liam asked, opening the front door concernedly.
“I’m fine, hun. Be right in.” Sebastian smiled up at his mate. Liam looked at Sebastian a second longer and then dubiously shut the door.
“Seriously though, do I need to beat some sense into him?” Sebastian asked. Felix wiped at his eyes. He should have known his best friend would be on his side.
“No, I need to do this for myself. Thanks for the offer though, Shamu,” Felix joked.
“Har har. Just wait until it’s your turn. This shit is not fun. I don’t know how normal human women do this. Rebecca is a damn goddess in my opinion.” Sebastian grunted.
“Let’s get my mate remembering I exist before we plan babies, okay?” Felix rubbed Sebastian’s belly.
“I am not a Buddha statue, stop it.” Sebastian batted Felix’s hand away.
“Okay hun, I gotta go blow his mind with Christmas decorations, then blow him, before I allow him to blow me.” Felix wagged his eyebrows.
“Onward, horny soldier!” Sebastian gave a salute.
“Love ya.” Felix called, getting into the car.
“Love ya back. Oh and Felix,” Sebastian yelled. Felix stood back up next to the car.
“Yeah?”
“Merry Christmas.”
“Merry Christmas to you too.” Felix got in the car and waved as he drove off.
* * * *
Felix was just putting the finishing touches on the tree when he heard his mate behind him.
“What in the hell is all of this?” Claybourne demanded.
“It’s Christmas decorations. I couldn’t sleep and realized we didn’t even have a tree, so I went out to get one. Of course the stores are picked clean, it’s a good thing that Rian had too much in his effort to overthrow Martha Stewart.” Felix put the empty ornament box on the coffee table.
He had put up a pre-lit Christmas tree, a garla
nd on the fireplace, and all kinds of Christmas knick-knacks around the room. He had even found two stockings at the grocery store that were perfect for them. One had a stethoscope around it, the other a thermometer.
He decided that pie was beyond him, but he got a tube of Pillsbury cinnamon rolls and they made the house smell heavenly. There was even eggnog waiting for him later in the fridge.
“Take it down. Take it all down.” Claybourne’s fists shook beside his body.
“What?” Felix whispered.
“Take it down! It’s gaudy and tacky and, and messy!” Claybourne exploded.
“No! Do you know how hard I have worked to make this special for us? It’s our first Christmas together, we should celebrate,” Felix protested, feeling a ball of ice form in his stomach.
“Did you ever stop to think about what I would want? The tree and the garland are littering needles all over the place. The little snowman is just clutter that I’ll have to move to clean since you don’t feel like you have to. You just created more work for me!” Claybourne ground out from between his clenched teeth.
“What? What!” Felix couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He couldn’t stop the wave of nausea that crept up the back of his throat. Pushing past his mate, he ran to the guest bathroom and locked the door. He had just enough time to raise the lid and his stomach emptied all of the candy he had been snacking on all morning in fits of nervousness.
“Felix! Felix open the door! Are you all right? Let me in!” Felix could hear Claybourne’s frantic yells.
“You forgot me,” he whispered. The pounding on the door stopped.
“What?” Claybourne asked.
“This morning you forgot me. You locked the door behind you and went to bed. When I came in I looked around and realized that there was nothing of me in the house. That if you got rid of my clothes I would disappear from your life.” Felix panted and fought back another wave of nausea.
“That’s not true,” Claybourne whispered.
“It’s my first Christmas out of that cage. For years I didn’t get to have Christmas. I wanted this to be special. I wanted to be special to you. I can’t do this anymore.” Felix wept and threw up again.
“Felix, just open the door, baby, let me check on you please.” Claybourne pounded on the door. Exhausted, Felix realized he was losing track of time, he was only catching bits and pieces of what Claybourne was saying.
When the pounding on the door turned into a full-out attack Felix shifted into a two-thousand-pound walrus and lay against the door.
Bah fucking humbug!
* * * *
“Felix, come on buddy, shift back and open the door.” Felix opened his eyes and looked down. He remembered what had led to him shifting and he felt his heart break.
“Felix, you’re scaring me to death. Open the door.” Felix realized that it was Sebastian calling out to him, not Claybourne. Shifting back, he struggled to get up. He grabbed a towel from under the cabinet and knotted it around his waist. His clothes lay in tatters around him. He opened the door and peeked out. Sebastian pushed the door open, cracking him in the forehead and squeezing inside before closing the door again.
“What happened? Claybourne called me losing his damn mind. He said that you were sick and wouldn’t open the bathroom door. I’ve never seen that man lose his composure the way he did when he couldn’t get to you, not even when y’all were racing to find a cure to the virus. He is absolutely frantic. Kent and Liam had to get him to shift and go for a run.” Sebastian sat down on the toilet seat.
“He’s probably just concerned because he’s a doctor and it would look bad if I died in his bathroom or something,” Felix said, hopping up on the counter.
“Die! Who said anything about dying? What in the hell is going on?” Sebastian said, panic edging into his voice.
“Calm down, Papa Smurf, I’m fine. He got me so upset I tossed my candy-laden cookies into the toilet. I probably passed out due to stress and due to the fact that I’d been up for over twenty-four hours when he decided to get all pissy.” Felix relaxed against the mirror.
“You’re fine though, right? You’re not pregnant?” Sebastian asked. Felix shook his head.
“Things have been so rocky lately I haven’t even brought it up.”
“What do you mean he got pissy? Because according to him, he was a complete and utter insensitive ass and you were leaving him.”
“Leaving him?” Felix sat straight up, struggling to remember what he had said.
I can’t do this anymore.
“Oh fuck, I may have said something like that. But I didn’t mean it that way. All I wanted was to enjoy Christmas with my mate. How did things go so wrong?”
“How was he an insensitive ass?”
“He told me to take down all of the Christmas decorations, that they were gaudy and tacky.” Felix wiped away his tears.
“Tacky! There’s no way Rian would buy anything that was tacky!”
“I know right!”
“What else?”
“That was pretty much it. Oh, and I created more work for him since I don’t clean around here and all the Christmas stuff would make it harder for him to keep the house picked up.”
“He’s right.”
“What?”
“He was an insensitive ass.”
“I just wish he would have just talked to me about it, like an adult. He just ordered me around and belittled me like a child,” Felix complained.
“No, like my father,” Claybourne said slowly, opening the door.
“Come on, Sebastian, let’s give them some space,” Liam said from the hallway where he waited with Kent.
“Let’s get one thing straight, Doc. I love you, because to me Felix is my brother and you are his mate. But if you hurt my brother again I will bring down a world of hurt on you. I’ve kept my mouth shut up until this point hoping you’d pull your head out of your ass and see how shitty you’ve been treating him. This is your first and last warning. You better start treating my brother right or you will see what kind of scary shit I can shift into, because I have tricks that even Felix doesn’t know about.” Sebastian stood up and stretched, rubbing his back.
“Now make up and give me a niece or nephew to spoil.” He grinned evilly at Claybourne, who swallowed hard.
“Oh and Doc, I’ll see you tomorrow for my appointment at nine a.m.” Sebastian waddled past Felix and Claybourne to Liam.
“Good luck, Doc,” Liam said, and all three walked down the hallway.
“Felix I’m…” Claybourne started.
“I’m stealing your cinnamon rolls!” Felix heard Sebastian yell from the kitchen.
Smiling, he yelled back, “Go ahead, what’s another ten pounds!”
“Fuck you! And for that I’m taking all of them.” Felix smiled until he heard the front door close and his friend was gone.
“You were right!” Claybourne blurted out.
“Huh? About what?” Felix asked, wanting clarification.
“All of it. You’re right, we should be enjoying our first Christmas together. You’re right, you don’t have a presence in our home, that’s my fault. Every time you bought something, it would seem out of place, you were considerate of my feelings and got rid of it. I had no idea that’s what I was doing. It wasn’t because you aren’t special to me.” Claybourne dropped to his knees, crying.
“I never even realized that it was your first Christmas being free, of course you’d want to celebrate. But once again it was all about me. I freaked out that things were different. There were needles on the floor. The lights weren’t symmetrical on the tree. The snowman on the left side of the fireplace has a button missing. I turned into the one person I hate most in the world.” Claybourne pounded his fists into his thighs. Felix jumped off of the counter and dropped onto the floor beside his mate, grabbing both hands.
“I should have thought about what these changes would do. I just thought that it would be okay since it was Christmas and who
doesn’t like Christmas?”
“Stop it! Stop making excuses for me. You are always compromising, always being selfless and putting what you want aside for my own asinine ways.”
“You’re my mate, of course I’ll compromise. It just hurt the way you came at me like that,” Felix admitted softly.
“We never celebrated Christmas when I was a child. Christmas meant mother would be busy with dinner parties and father would open a new bottle of whiskey. The house was never decorated. The one time I tried to put up a tree like my friends had, that is what my father yelled, ‘Take it down, it’s tacky and gaudy!’ After I left home, I didn’t know how to celebrate. It was just me, so I never started.” Claybourne looked up and Felix could see the stark terror in his eyes at the thought of becoming like his father.
“Come with me.” Felix stood and pulled his mate up. He walked him back into the family room.
He sat Claybourne on the sofa. He ran to the kitchen and grabbed the dustpan and foxtail. He quickly swept up the loose plastic needles and threw them away. Next he grabbed a black Sharpie from the utility drawer and drew a button on the snow man. He stood in front of his mate.
“Okay, what needs to be changed with the lights?” he asked. Claybourne looked at him for a second like he had lost his mind. Felix rolled his hand in front of him.
“Come on.”
“The branch on the right, there is a light strand that dips down lower than on the left.”
Felix turned and eyed the tree before he saw what his mate was talking about. He adjusted the light strand and stood back.
“What else?”
“I hate purple bulbs. Purple is just not a Christmas color.”
Felix easily plucked off the handful of purple bulbs.
“Now, tell me what you like.”
“I like that the tree’s lights are white. It seems to make it glow. The color ones are never organized evenly. I like the smell of cinnamon. I love our stockings. I saw them when I came back out here for the phone to call Sebastian. You really scared the hell out of me.” Claybourne looked up at him. This time the fear he saw there reached all the way to his mate’s soul.