Page 47 of Swan Song


  “I lived through the blast in Manhattan. So did Artie. How come the radiation hasn’t already killed us?”

  “Some people seem to be more resistant than others. It’s a fluke. But that doesn’t mean you can keep absorbing radiation and shrug it off.”

  “Doctor, if I was going to die from radiation, I’d be bones by now. And the air’s full of the shit anyway—you know it as well as I do! The stuff’s everywhere!”

  “The wind’s carried it, yes,” he admitted. “But you’re wanting to walk right back into a supercontaminated area! Now, I don’t know your reasons for wanting to go to—”

  “No, you don’t,” she said. “And you can’t. So save your breath; I’m going to rest here for a while, and then I’m leaving.”

  Dr. Eichelbaum started to protest again; then he saw the determination in the woman’s stare, and he knew there was nothing more to be said. Still, it was in his nature to have the last word: “You’re crazy.” Then he turned and stalked away, figuring he had better things to do than trying to keep another fruitcake from committing suicide.

  “Kansas,” Artie Wisco said softly. “That’s a long way from here.”

  “Yeah. I’m going to need a good pair of shoes.”

  Suddenly Artie’s eyes glistened with tears. He reached out and grasped Sister’s hand, pressing it against his cheek. “God bless you,” he said. “Oh ... God bless you.”

  Sister leaned down and hugged him, and he kissed her cheek. She felt the wetness of a tear, and her own heart ached for him.

  “You’re the finest lady I’ve ever known,” he told her. “Next to my wife, I mean.”

  She kissed him, and then she straightened up again. Her eyes were wet, and she knew that in the years ahead she would think of him many times, and in her heart she would say a prayer for him. “You go to Detroit,” she said. “You find her. You hear?”

  “Yeah. I hear.” He nodded, his eyes as bright as new pennies.

  Sister turned away, and Paul Thorson followed her. Behind her, she heard Robot say, “Man, I had an uncle in Detroit. I was kinda thinkin’ about ...”

  Sister wound her way through the hospital and out the doors. She stood staring at the football field, which was covered with tents, cars and trucks. The sky was dull gray, heavy with clouds. Off to the right, in front of the high school and under a long red canopy, was a large bulletin board where people stuck messages and questions. The board was always jammed, and Sister had walked along it the day before, looking at the pleas scribbled on scratch paper: “Searching for daughter, Becky Rollins, age fourteen. Lost in Shenandoah area July 17 ...”; “Anybody with information about the DiBattista family from Scranton please leave ...”; “Looking for Reverend Bowden, First Presbyterian Church of Hazleton, services urgently needed ...”

  Sister walked to the fence that surrounded the football field, set the duffel bag on the ground beside her and wound her fingers tightly through the mesh. Behind her came the sound of a woman wailing at the bulletin board, and Sister flinched. Oh, God, Sister thought, what have we done?

  “Kansas, huh? What the hell do you want to go way out there for?”

  Paul Thorson was beside her, leaning against the fence. There was a splint along the bridge of his broken nose. “Kansas,” he prompted. “What’s out there?”

  “A town called Matheson. I saw it in the glass ring, and I found it in the road atlas. That’s where I’m going.”

  “Yeah, but why?” He pulled up the collar of his battered leather jacket against the cold; he’d fought to keep the jacket as hard as Sister had fought for her duffel bag, and he wore it over the clean white coveralls.

  “Because ...” She paused, and then she decided to tell him what she’d been thinking since she’d found the road atlas. “Because I feel like I’m being led toward something—or someone. I think the things I’ve been seeing in that glass are real. My dreamwalking has been to real places. I don’t know why or how. Maybe the glass ring is like ... I don’t know, like an antenna or something. Or like radar, or a key to a door I never even knew existed. I think I’m being led for some reason, and I’ve got to go.”

  “Now you’re talking like the lady who saw a monster with roaming eyeballs.”

  “I don’t expect you to understand. I don’t expect you to give a shit, and I didn’t ask you. What are you doing hanging around me, anyway? Didn’t they assign you a tent?”

  “Yeah, they did. I’m in with three other men. One of them cries all the time, and another one can’t stop talking about baseball. I hate baseball.”

  “What don’t you hate, Mr. Thorson?”

  He shrugged and looked around, watching an elderly man and woman, both of their faces streaked with keloids, supporting each other as they staggered away from the bulletin board. “I don’t hate being alone,” he said finally, “I don’t hate depending on myself. And I don’t hate myself—though sometimes I don’t like myself too much. I don’t hate drinking. That’s about it.”

  “Good for you. Well, I want to thank you for saving my life, and Artie’s, too. You took good care of us, and I appreciate that. So—” She stuck out her hand.

  But he didn’t shake it. “What have you got that’s worth a damn?” he asked her.

  “Huh?”

  “Something valuable. Do you have anything worth trading?”

  “Trading for what?”

  He nodded toward the vehicles parked on the field. She saw he was looking at a dented old Army Jeep with a patched convertible top painted with camouflage colors. “You got anything in that bag you could trade for a Jeep?”

  “No. I don’t—” And then she remembered that deep down in her duffel bag were the chunks of jewel-encrusted glass she’d picked up, along with the ring, in the ruins of Steuben Glass and Tiffany’s. She’d transferred them from the Gucci bag and forgotten them.

  “You’re going to need transportation,” he said. “You can’t walk from here to Kansas. And what are you going to do about gasoline, food and water? You’ll need a gun, matches, a good flashlight and warm clothes. Like I say, lady, what’s out there is going to be like Dodge City and Dante’s Inferno rolled into one.”

  “Maybe it will be. But why should you care?”

  “I don’t. I’m just trying to warn you, that’s all.”

  “I can take care of myself.”

  “Yeah, I’ll bet you can. I’ll bet you were the bitch of the ball.”

  “Hey!” somebody called. “Hey, I’ve been lookin’ for you, lady!”

  Approaching them was the tall man in the fleece-lined coat and Stroh’s beer cap who had been on sentry duty and heard the gunshots. “Been lookin’ for you,” he said as he chewed a couple of sticks of gum. “Eichelbaum said you were around.”

  “You found me. What is it?”

  “Well,” he said, “I kinda thought you was familiar the first time I seen you. He said you’d be carryin’ a big leather bag, though, so I guess that’s what threw me.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “It was two, three days before you folks got here. Fella just come ridin’ along I-80 like he was out on a Sunday afternoon; he was on one of them French racin’ bicycles with the handlebars slung low. Oh, I remember him, ‘cause ol’ Bobby Coates and me was up in the church tower on lookout, and Bobby punches me in the arm and says, ‘Cleve, look at that shit!’ Well, I looked and I seen it, but I still didn’t believe it!”

  “Speak English, friend!” Paul snapped. “What was it?”

  “Oh, it was a man. Pedalin’ that bike along I-80. But what was real weird was that he about had thirty or forty wolves followin’ him, almost at his heels. Just paradin’ along. And just before he gets to the top of the hill, this fella gets off his bike and turns around—and them wolves cower and slink like they was face-to-face with God. Then they broke and ran, and this fella walks his bike to the top of the hill.” Cleve shrugged, puzzlement scrawled across his bovine face. “Well, we went out to get him. Big fella. Husky. Ha
rd to tell how old he was, though. He had white hair, but his face was young. Anyway, he was wearin’ a suit and tie and a gray raincoat. Didn’t seem to be hurt or anything. He had on two-tone shoes. I remember that real well. Two-tone shoes.” Cleve grunted, shook his head and directed his gaze at Sister. “He asked about you, lady. Asked if we’d seen a lady with a big leather bag. Said you was a relative, and that he had to find you. He seemed real eager and interested to find you, too. But me and Bobby didn’t know nothin’ about you, o’ course, and this fella asked the other sentries, but they didn’t know you, either. Said we’d take him into Homewood, give him a meal and shelter and let the Red Cross folks look him over.”

  Sister’s heart had begun pounding, and she felt very cold. “What ... happened to him?”

  “Oh, he went on. Thanked us kindly and said he had miles to go yet. Then he wished us well and pedaled on out of sight, headin’ west.”

  “How’d you know this guy was looking for her?” Paul asked. “He could’ve been searching for some other woman carrying a leather bag!”

  “Oh no,” Cleve answered, and smiled. “He described this lady here so well I could see her face right in my head. Just like a picture. That’s why I thought you looked familiar at first, but I just this mornin’ put it together. See, you didn’t have a leather bag, and that’s what threw me.” He looked at Sister. “Did you know him, ma’am?”

  “Yes,” she replied. “Oh, yes, I know him. Did he ... give you his name?”

  “Hallmark. Darryl, Dal, Dave ... somethin’ like that. Well, he’s gone west. Don’t know what he’ll find out there. Too bad you two missed each other so near.”

  “Yes.” Sister felt as if her ribs had been laced with steel bands. “Too bad.”

  Cleve tipped his cap and went on about his business. Sister felt as if she were about to faint, and she had to lean against the fence for support.

  “Who was he?” Paul asked—but the tone of his voice said that he was afraid to know.

  “I’ve got to go to Kansas,” Sister said firmly. “I’ve got to follow what I’ve seen in the glass ring. He’s not going to give up looking for me, because he wants the glass ring, too. He wants to destroy it, and I can’t let him get his hands on it—or I’ll never know what I’m supposed to find. Or who I’m looking for.”

  “You’re going to need a gun.” Paul was spooked by both Cleve’s story and the terror in Sister’s eyes. Nobody human could’ve gotten through those wolves without a scratch, he thought. And on a French racing bicycle? Was it possible that everything she’d told him was true? “A real big gun,” he added.

  “There’s not one big enough.” She picked up her duffel bag and started walking away from the high school, up the hill toward the tent she’d been assigned to.

  Paul stood watching her go. Shit! he thought. What’s going on here? That lady’s got a ton of guts, but she’s going to get herself slaughtered out there on old I-80! He thought she had about as much chance to get to Kansas alone as a Christian in a Cadillac had of getting to Heaven. He looked around at the hundreds of tents in the wooded hills, at the little campfires and burning lanterns that surrounded Homewood, and he shuddered.

  This damned town’s got too many people in it, he thought. He couldn’t stand having to live in a tent with three other men. Everywhere he turned, there were people. They were all over the place, and he knew that pretty soon he’d have to hit the road or go crazy. So why not go to Kansas? Why not?

  Because, he answered himself, we’ll never get there.

  So? Were you planning on living forever?

  I can’t let her go alone, he decided. Jesus Christ, I just can’t!

  “Hey!” he called after her, but she kept going, didn’t even look back. “Hey, maybe I’ll help you get a Jeep! But that’s all! Don’t expect me to do anything else!”

  Sister kept walking, burdened with thought.

  “Okay, I’ll help you get some food and water, too!” Paul told her. “But you’re on your own with the gun and gasoline!”

  One step at a time, she was thinking. One step at a time gets you where you’re going. And oh, Lord, I’ve got such a long way to go

  “Okay, damn it! I’ll help you!”

  Sister finally heard him. She turned toward Paul. “What’d you say?”

  “I said I’d help you!” He shrugged and started walking toward her. “I might as well add another layer to the shitcake, huh?”

  “Yes,” she said, and a smile played at the corners of her mouth. “You might as well.”

  Darkness came, and an icy rain fell on Homewood. In the woods the wolves howled, and the wind blew radiation across the land, and the world turned toward a new day.

  47

  THE BICYCLE’S TIRES MADE a singing sound in the dark. Every so often they thumped over a corpse or veered around a wrecked car, but the legs that powered them had places to go.

  Two-toned shoes on the pedals, the man leaned forward and pumped along Interstate 80, about twelve miles east of the Ohio line. The ashes of Pittsburgh flecked his suit. He’d spent two days amid the ruins, had found a group of survivors there and looked into their minds for the face of the woman with the circle of glass. But it wasn’t in any of their heads, and before he’d left he’d convinced them all that eating the burned meat of dead bodies was a cure for radiation poisoning. He’d even helped them start on the first one.

  Bon appetit, he thought. Below him, his legs pumped like pistons.

  Where are you? he wondered. You can’t have come this far! Not yet! Unless you’re running day and night because you know I’m on your ass.

  When the wolves had come out to first snap and then fawn at his heels, he’d thought they had gotten her, way back in eastern Pennsylvania. But if that were so, where was the leather bag? Her face hadn’t been in the minds of the sentries back at Homewood, either, and if she’d been there, they would be the ones to know. So where was she? And—most importantly—where was the glass thing?

  He didn’t like the idea of its being out there somewhere. Didn’t know what it was, or why it had come to be, but whatever it was, he wanted to smash it beneath his shoes. Wanted to break it into tiny fragments and grind those pieces into the woman’s face.

  Sister, he thought, and he sneered.

  His fingers clenched the handlebars. The glass circle had to be found. Had to be. This was his party now, and such things were not allowed. He didn’t like the way the woman had looked at it—and he didn’t like the way she’d fought for it, either. It gave her false hope. So it was a humane thing, really, to find the glass circle and smash it and make her eat the shards. There was no telling how many others she could infect if she wasn’t stopped.

  Maybe she was already dead. Maybe one of her own kind had killed her and stolen her bag. Maybe, maybe, maybe ...

  There were too many maybes. But no matter who had it, or where it was, he had to find the glass circle, because such a thing as that should not be, and when it had gone dark and cold in his grip he’d known it was reading his soul.

  “This is my party!” he shouted, and he drove over a dead man lying in his path.

  But there were so many places to search, so many highways to follow. She must have turned off I-80 before she’d reached Homewood. But why would she? He remembered her saying, “We keep going west.” And she would follow the line of least resistance, wouldn’t she? Could she have taken shelter in one of the small hamlets between Jersey City and Homewood? If so, that would mean she was behind him, not ahead.

  But everything and everyone was dead east of Homewood and that damned Red Cross station, right?

  He slowed down, passing a crumpled sign that said NEW CASTLE NEXT LEFT He was going to have to pull off and find a map somewhere, maybe retrace his route along another highway. Maybe she’d gone south and missed Homewood entirely. Maybe she was on a rural road somewhere right now, crouched by a fire and playing with that damned glass thing. Maybe, maybe, maybe ...

  It was a big c
ountry. But he had time, he reasoned as he swung off I-80 at the New Castle exit. He had tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that. It was his party now, and he made the rules.

  He’d find her. Oh, yes! Find her and shove that glass ring right up her ...

  He realized the wind had died down. It wasn’t blowing as hard as it had been even a few hours before. That was why he hadn’t been able to search properly yet. He had trouble searching when the wind was so rough—but the wind was his friend, too, because it spread the party dust.

  He licked a finger with a cat-rough tongue and held it up. Yes, the wind had definitely weakened, though errant gusts still blew in his face and brought the smell of burned meat. It was time—past time—to get started.

  His mouth opened. Stretched, and began to stretch wider still, while his black eyes stared from a handsome face.

  A fly crawled out onto his lower lip. It was a shiny, ugly green, the kind of fly that might explode from the nostrils of a bloated corpse. It waited there, its iridescent wings twitching.

  Another fly crawled from his mouth. Then a third, a fourth and a fifth. Six more scrabbled out and clung to his lower lip. A dozen others seeped out like a green tide. In another few seconds there were fifty or more flies around his mouth, a green froth that hummed and twitched with eager anticipation.

  “Away,” he whispered, and the movement of his lips sent the first group of them into the air, their wings vibrating against the wind until they found their balance. Others took off, nine or ten at a time, and their formations flew to all points of the compass. They were part of him, and they lived down in the damp cellar of his soul where such things grew, and after they made their slow radius of two or three miles they’d return to him as if he were the center of the universe. And when they came back, he’d see what they’d seen—a fire burning, sparking off a ring of glass; or her face, asleep in a room where she thought she was safe. If they didn’t find her tonight, there was always tomorrow. And the next day. Sooner or later, they would find a chink in a wall that brought him down on her, and this time he’d Watusi on her bones.