‘I find it hard to believe he’d know about Aruhani.’
‘Seeing as you’ve been trying so hard these past few years to uncreate the dehar you created?’
‘What do you mean by that?’
‘You know.’ Lileem knew this was not the time and place to introduce such a sensitive topic, but couldn’t help herself. ‘Ever since the Uigenna took you, you’ve turned your back on all your work. Something happened, didn’t it? Something you didn’t like. I felt you call upon Aruhani, when I was crouched in the cellar of the white house with Mima. He came, didn’t he?’
‘Maybe I was playing with fire,’ Flick said in a fierce low voice. ‘I am not like Orien, or even Ulaume. I thought I was something, then I found out I wasn’t. I’m not a great magus, Lee. I called up a demon and learned how dangerous that can be. That’s all I’ll say.’
‘You’re wrong,’ Lileem said. ‘Whatever happened, you shouldn’t turn away from the dehara. Aruhani helped us escape the Gelaming. He is not a demon.’
‘I created him from the darkest corners of myself,’ Flick said. ‘Perhaps he can be something else for you, but for me he will always be the amoral force that made me…’ He shook his head. ‘You don’t understand. I was like them, Lee. It was pelki, and I wanted it. Enjoyed it. I never want to feel like that again.’
Lileem stared at him for some moments. She wasn’t absolutely sure what he was trying to tell her, but it was nothing like she’d imagined. She’d believed Aruhani had made him violent, made him kill. He hadn’t spoken of this before, she was sure. He hadn’t even told Ulaume. ‘He is the dehar of life and death,’ she said, ‘as well as aruna, in all its aspects. Maybe you didn’t know him then as well as you thought you did, and maybe you called upon the wrong aspect, or weren’t specific enough, but you can’t blame him for what happened.’
‘I don’t. I blame myself. Aruhani came from me.’ Flick rubbed his face with his hands and pushed back his hair. For a few moments, he stared up at the smoke blackened beams of the ceiling, his fingers pressed against his scalp. ‘Strange I should speak of this now. I never thought I would.’
Lileem embraced him and he laid his head on her shoulder. ‘It’s gone,’ she said. ‘You let it out like Ulaume let out the scream ghosts from Pell’s old home.’
Flick squeezed her briefly. ‘I wonder,’ he said.
A fog descended from the mountains and poured over the river. The Freyhellan long boat moored at the river docks looked ghostly in its misty shroud. Galdra accompanied the travellers to the boat to see them off, as did many other Freyhellans. Lileem felt as if they were leaving old friends: the visit here had been too brief. But perhaps a day would come when she could return.
For some reason, Galdra singled Lileem out as they walked to the docks. She sensed he had something to say, something he didn’t want the others to hear. While they engaged in small talk, he wouldn’t reveal what was on his mind, so Lileem fell silent, hoping that Galdra would find the silence too uncomfortable and open up. After a minute or so, he drew in his breath. ‘Last night, I dreamed of my son,’ he said.
‘Your son?’ Lileem frowned. She hadn’t seen a harling of Galdra and Tyr’s in Freyhella.
Galdra sighed. ‘I do not yet have a son.’
‘Oh…’
‘He gave me a warning… if it was that… or maybe just a message.’
‘What did he say?’
‘That I could not escape my destiny. That it would find me. He said that in the wake of grief I would travel to Immanion. I would find in that place a love that would consume me, change my life. He said he would come to me soon after and that a har like no other would help him find me. He spoke a name.’
‘A name.’ Lileem hardly dared ask. ‘What was it?’
Galdra stared at her for a few seconds. ‘Yours,’ he said.
‘Galdra…’ Lileem stopped walking. ‘I don’t understand what you…’
‘I love Tyr,’ Galdra said. ‘He is my life. Without him, I am nothing. There can be no other love.’
‘It was just a dream,’ Lileem said, knowing how unconvincing that sounded. ‘It couldn’t have been my name.’
‘Like I said, a warning.’ Galdra shrugged. ‘Do you have no idea what it might mean?’
‘No,’ Lileem said. ‘I really don’t. I can never go to Immanion. There is no…’ She drew in her breath. ‘There is no recognition between us, Galdra. We will never be together. It isn’t me. It can’t be.’
‘I know that,’ he said. ‘That’s not what I meant. But you are part of it.’
‘I know nothing of what you speak. I wish you no ill. You must know that.’
He nodded. ‘Yes. But I had to tell you. Remember it.’
She put a hand on his arm. ‘I will, but please…’ She shook her head. ‘I think it was just a dream.’
Galdra only smiled at her rather sadly. He said nothing more.
The Roselane hara began to embark while Lileem and her companions bid farewell to Galdra. A few Freyhellans would travel with them, and once the river was no longer negotiable, the passengers would leave the boat, which would then return to Freygard. Galdra had given them currency and generous supplies.
Just before Lileem and her party were about to board the boat, a har on horseback rode up to Galdra and pulled his mount to a halt. ‘Tiahaar, I have a message.’
Galdra paused in the act of embracing Ulaume in farewell, but didn’t let him go. ‘What is it?’
‘There is a har in the high meadows who summons the Megalithicans. He has horses and says that they must not ride the river. They must go with him.’
Galdra released Ulaume. ‘Who is this har?’
‘I know not. He would not give a name. He said the har Lileem would know to follow him.’
Lileem glanced at Flick. Could it be Pellaz? ‘I’ll go and see,’ she said. ‘I’ll go at once.’
‘Wait!’ Tel-an-Kaa snapped. ‘You can’t be serious, Lee. It could be Gelaming.’
‘It isn’t,’ Lileem said. ‘He knows my name.’
‘That is no basis for…’
‘I’m going,’ Lileem said.
‘I’ll come with you,’ Mima said.
‘No!’ Without asking for permission, Lileem jumped up onto the back of a horse tethered nearby and called to the messenger. ‘Take me to him.’
‘Lileem!’ Tel-an-Kaa cried and tried to grab hold of the horse’s reins to prevent her leaving, but Lileem was too quick for her. She did not look back, but she heard Flick say, ‘Let him go. He knows what he’s doing.’
And Mima’s voice: ‘I wish I did! We must follow them.’
But whatever Flick said to that, Lileem did not hear.
The Freyhellan led the way out of town up into the forested hills behind it. Lileem could hear the muffled tocking of bells worn by sheep or cattle. Her guide led her to a sheer sloping meadow. Tall pines around it were mere black shadows in the fog.
‘He is here somewhere,’ said the Freyhellan.
Lileem called, ‘Hello! It is I, Lileem!’
After a few moments, a figure emerged from the fog. He did not move, but the mist around him simply drew apart like a veil. Behind him were a number of spectral white horses. They stood with lowered heads, as if asleep.
‘Wait here!’ Lileem said to her guide, and leapt down from her horse. It was as if she stepped into a different world. The har before her was swathed in a cloak of shimmering grey fabric. The heavy hood was trimmed with wolf fur, which obscured most of the har’s face, but for the mouth and chin.
Lileem went up to him. ‘I am Lileem. Who are you?’
The har stood motionless, unnaturally so. ‘I have brought you transport of a more suitable nature,’ he said, in a low, musical voice. ‘Whatever your destination, you may reach it quickly through this means.’
‘Are you Gelaming?’
‘Yes, but no enemy of yours. The Tigron has sent me.’
‘He heard me,’ Lileem said softly, still amazed in s
pite of her conviction.
‘There is little he does not hear,’ said the Gelaming. ‘Bring your companions to this place, and make haste. Bring only those closest to you. The others can travel by more conventional means.’
‘This could be a trap.’
‘Except that it’s not and you know it.’ The har lifted long pale hands and threw back the hood of his cloak. Dark red hair fell forward over his shoulders. His face was elfin, the eyes large and dark. ‘I am Vaysh, the Tigron’s aide. Only he and I know of this visit.’ The Tigron’s aide could have stepped from an ancient myth: he seemed barely har, more unearthly than that, but perhaps all Gelaming appeared that way. They could cloak themselves with glamours as Tel-an-Kaa could.
‘Why is Pellaz helping me?’ Lileem asked. ‘How does he know of me? Does he know of the dehara? Does he know about Terez and…?’
‘Quiet!’ said Vaysh. ‘I am not here to answer your questions, merely to facilitate your journey. You would be wise to fetch your companions at once, because there are others sniffing around this part of the world whose sole aim is to take you to Immanion.’
‘Why?’
‘There are not many things the Tigron does not know,’ said Vaysh, ‘but Lord Thiede has his private agendas upon certain issues. He fears most what he cannot kill.’
Lileem had no idea what the Gelaming was talking about. ‘Did Terez reach Immanion?’ she asked. ‘You must tell me that at least.’
‘I have no knowledge of such a har,’ said Vaysh. ‘You called to Pellaz and he heard you. That is all I know.’
‘I’ll bring my friends at once,’ Lileem said. ‘Don’t go away.’
Vaysh said nothing. He was as much like a statue as her vision of Pellaz had been.
Lileem’s companions waited fearfully for her return. Flick wondered whether in fact she would and sensed the Zigane had the same concern. ‘Silly little fool!’ Tel-an-Kaa muttered, more than once.
But very shortly after her departure, Lileem’s horse came hurtling back. From the expression on her face, Flick could tell something amazing had occurred. She told them exactly what in excited, garbled words.
‘Travel with the Gelaming?’ Tel-an-Kaa asked scornfully. ‘I hardly think that is a wise idea.’
‘It isn’t a trap,’ Lileem said earnestly. She turned to her companions. ‘Isn’t this what we’ve all wanted, the Tigron’s help? Didn’t you all complain that Pellaz had forgotten you and turned his back on the past? Well, he hasn’t, so stop being so stupid and come with me, will you? Vaysh might get impatient and leave. Hurry up!’
‘I don’t know,’ Tel-an-Kaa began, but fortunately Mima took control.
‘Let’s go,’ she said. ‘Let’s look these gift horses in the mouth. Are we going to be flying up into the sky? I, for one, don’t want to miss that!’
‘Me neither,’ Ulaume said. ‘Flick?’
Flick shrugged. ‘I’ll go with the majority.’ He saw Lileem’s furious expression. ‘OK, OK, let’s do it.’
The Zigane was outnumbered.
‘Go with the blessings of Freyhella,’ Galdra said to them. ‘May the spirits of air keep you safe.’
‘Farewell, Galdra har Freyhella,’ Lileem said. ‘May the spirits keep you safe also.’
Galdra smiled grimly and raised a hand in farewell. He gestured to his hara and they resumed their work in helping the rest of the Roselane embark upon the river boat. ‘Adinn, go with the others to the Gelaming,’ he said to one of his hara. ‘Bring the horses back afterwards.’
‘As you wish, tiahaar,’ the Freyhellan responded, and indicated Lileem’s party should all mount up and follow him.
Flick felt very uncomfortable with the whole idea, but if the offer from the Gelaming was genuine, it would save them a lot of time, and as Mima had pointed out, this was hardly an experience they could refuse. They rode their Freyhellan horses to the mountain meadow, and there Vaysh was still waiting for them. Lileem said it looked as if he hadn’t moved a muscle since she’d left him. The horses behind him were magnificent and immense, even more so than the Varrish animals, which had been the largest Flick had ever seen. He sensed that the Zigane would take over the whole proceedings and speak to Vaysh, so before she could do this, Flick pushed his way to the front of the group. ‘I have two questions to ask you,’ he said, to the stern and haughty har before him, ‘and we will not go with you until you answer them.’
Vaysh regarded him stonily. ‘I am not here to answer questions. I am here to help you on your journey.’
‘Is it true?’ Flick asked. ‘I must know. Did Pell really die?’ Despite what Seel had told him, part of him still believed that Thiede had spun some grand illusion.
‘Yes,’ Vaysh replied.
‘Was he made this Tigron thing against his will?’
‘No. Are you ready? We should depart at once.’
Two questions were not enough but the answers Flick had received effectively silenced him. In the world he inhabited, hara did not come back from the dead, or if they did, they were like Orien, mere shadows.
‘You expect us to ride these Gelaming monstrosities?’ Tel-an-Kaa enquired icily.
‘Yes,’ Vaysh said. ‘Do not fear. I am quite capable of guiding you all.’
‘Then you will know of our destination, where we are.’
‘We will know of that, in any case.’
Now it was Mima’s turn to push to the front. ‘How much do you know?’ she snapped. ‘Are you aware, for instance, who I am?’
Vaysh fixed her with a stare. ‘No. It is of little consequence to me who any of you are. Please, mount the horses. My time is precious.’
‘But…’ Mima began.
Tel-an-Kaa reached out to touch her shoulder. ‘Hush,’ she said gently. ‘Say no more.’
The Tigron may know many things, Flick thought, but he does not know about the Kamagrian. Perhaps he cannot see them as he sees the rest of us. He must be like a ghost, a powerful spirit, but he has limitations. The Pell I knew is dead. I must remember that.
‘Where do you wish to go?’ Vaysh asked Tel-an-Kaa.
‘Roselane in Jaddayoth,’ she replied, with clear reluctance. ‘Do you know of it?’
‘I know little of Jaddayoth. You must send me enough information to find it.’
Flick could tell the Zigane was far from happy about that. Perhaps she feared what Vaysh might pick up if she communicated with him by mind touch, but she had no other choice. They were being given a free ride, and the journey otherwise could take months.
After the reality-splitting experience of otherlane travel, the one thing Flick was sure of was that he wanted to keep his horse. Unlike Seel had in the past, he didn’t find the journey unsettling at all. In the space between the worlds, he felt utterly free, at one with the entity that bore him. Every care of his life fled away from him like a shrieking spirit. He laughed aloud and the sound left his essence in sparkling bubbles, leaving a trail behind him. This, he considered, was pure joy, pure being. It was like going through a spiritual cleanse.
When the horse leapt out into familiar reality once more, Flick was still laughing. His companions’ mounts all slid to a halt, but he kept on riding, galloping ahead. He still felt as if he were flying. He was high above the ground because the horse was so big. They had emerged into the mountainous landscape of Roselane, where spires of stone reared towards a cloudy sky. Eagles soared high above and the land seemed to go on forever, unspoilt and seething with power. Flick heard voices calling him back, but he didn’t care. He could very easily ride off into obscurity now. He had a magical Gelaming horse. He could go anywhere, except that he didn’t know how to pass into the otherlanes. Vaysh had controlled the animals on their journey, perhaps to avoid giving Gelaming power away to lesser hara.
Eventually Flick brought the horse to a stamping halt in a high mountain meadow, a valley between immense cliffs. If this was Roselane, he knew he was going to enjoy staying there for a time. It was like being in the landscape of a vis
ualisation, such as those he’d once visited with Itzama, so much bigger than reality should be. If he went into one of the caves on the rock faces, perhaps he would meet the shaman again. You see, I have grown. I have learned. I have passed through one of the gates now. I understand. Thank you.
Flick dismounted and led the horse up the valley. It nudged his back with its nose, snorting. Occasionally, it strained away from his grip to graze upon the lush mountain grass, like any normal beast. Although it was huge, and very powerful, it appeared to have a sweet nature. Around them, the trees were bare, and already snow coated the high peaks, but Flick guessed this would be paradise in summer time.
His reverie was cut short by the arrival of Vaysh, who didn’t look angry or impatient. His expression was impassive. He rode alongside Flick for a while and neither of them spoke. Then, Vaysh said, ‘Your friends are upset. You should return to them.’
‘I’m enjoying the solitude,’ Flick said. ‘I haven’t been alone for a long time.’
‘I cannot stay. I must return the sedim to Immanion. The creature you rode is not a horse exactly. It is a sedu.’
Flick stopped walking and stroked his horse’s neck. ‘Sedu…Can’t I keep him?’
Vaysh regarded him thoughtfully. ‘That is impossible.’
‘Pell’s brother stole my horse,’ Flick said. It was a small lie, but perhaps worth it. ‘I think that deserves compensation, and the Tigron can surely afford it.’
‘Pell’s brother…’
‘Yes, the Tigron might be interested to know about him, but then doesn’t he know everything already?’
Vaysh said nothing, but his expression was eloquent.
‘You can tell him Terez is har, as is Dorado, who I have not met. The last time I saw Terez he vowed to find Immanion. Do I take it that quest has not been successful?’
‘It occurred to me that the dark-skinned har in your company was once related to Pellaz,’ said Vaysh.