Ray rolled his eyes in disbelief. “No. No! Look, Courtney is my friend. We’ve worked together for a lot of years. She knows my family and I care for her, but it’s nothing like that. My concern for her was because of this nut job. I only came here because of the emails he sent. Just talk to him. He’s insane.”
“What I have at this point is simply a woman who is not home. There are no signs of struggle, and nothing out of place. Her boss, who shouldn’t be inside her apartment snooping around, is telling me she’s dead and blaming a respected surgeon.”
“I didn’t say she was dead. I’m just concerned for her safety.”
Detective Wilkins squinted, daring Ray to find fault with his diagnosis or maybe make sense of it. He chewed on an unlit cigarette.
“Detective, I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“I don’t want you to say anything. It might actually be in your best interest not to. We came because of an anonymous caller, hell, it could’ve been you. You check out so far, so I’m going to let you go, but if this girl turns up missing or dead, I’ll see you again, you got me?”
“I’m telling you, she’s already missing. You need to find her. Can you at least call this guy and ask him?”
“You want me to call someone and say, ‘hey, did you kidnap or kill anyone recently?’”
Ray shook his head in defeat. “What about his message about the prints and telling me not to call the police?”
“I don’t even know that message came from him. Or that he even exists. I’m starting to think you might need a vacation. I’m very sorry for your loss, sir, but it might have just taken its toll on your thinker.”
The detective patted him on the shoulder. “Go home before I arrest you just so you don’t hurt yourself.”
***
Courtney’s body was found dismembered and left in chunks on the lawn in front of her apartment building the next morning. It wasn’t long before the police were knocking on Ray Noonan’s front door. The doorbell woke Stephanie first. She stood next to his bed, tugging on the blanket that covered him as he slept. “Daddy, there are men at the door,” she said.
It frightened him. Stephanie yawned and showed no concern about the men or what they might want with her daddy so early on a Saturday morning.
Ray panicked. “Men?”
“Yep. Two of them but I didn’t answer the door. I just peeked out the window.”
“Good girl.”
BANG BANG BANG. The fists pounded on the door, followed by a second ring of the doorbell. Ray slid out of bed and quickly into a t-shirt. He hurried down the stairs and opened the door to see Detective Wilkins again, holding up his badge. The man with him was a sour looking man with dark skin and greying hair.
“Mr. Noonan,” Wilkins said.
“Detective. What can I do for you?”
Wilkins looked him up and down, and then looked at the little girl who was peeking around her daddy’s leg. He knelt down and his face formed something that resembled a smile. “Hello there,” he said.
Stephanie ducked behind her father and Ray put a reassuring hand on her head. The detective straightened back up and looked at Ray. “Can we talk in private?”
Ray nodded. “Steph, baby go upstairs and play. I’ll make breakfast in a few minutes.” She took her monkey and disappeared, smiling and without argument. “I will still be here in a few minutes, right?” he said to the police.
The detective held his hand out. “I think we got off on the wrong foot, Mr. Noonan. This is my partner, Detective Frank Allen. May we come in?”
Ray shook the hand and then stepped aside. “What’s going on detective?”
The detectives stepped inside and looked around. Ray led them into the kitchen and turned on the coffee maker.
“Nice place you got here,” Allen said.
“Thanks, what’s this about?” Ray repeated.
Wilkins cleared his throat. “Look, I got a call about two hours ago to go look at the pieces of your secretary.”
“Oh God,” Ray said. He backed into one of the wooden chairs at the breakfast table and sat. “Pieces?”
“Sorry about that. I shouldn’t have…” Wilkins started.
“Pieces? That fucker cut her up?”
“Mr. Noonan, I came here with the intention of arresting you, but you look rested. You don’t look like the guy who was up all night doing…well, doing what was done. Can you just tell me where you were between the time we last spoke and now?”
Ray’s lip began to quiver, but anger straightened it. “I came home. I spent the afternoon with my daughter and my mother. We ordered pizza and played board games until almost nine. My mother can vouch for me until then. She went home after we put Stephanie to bed.”
“Stephanie is your little girl?” Allen said.
“Yes. I went to sleep after that, sometime around ten. I’ve been sleeping on the couch ever since my wife…Look, have you talked to Babbit yet? Have you found him?”
The two cops looked at each other. “Yes, I spoke to James. I’ve known him a long time. We play golf occasionally. This was not the work of a surgeon, Mr. Noonan. It was too sloppy. James Babbit might be arrogant, even an ass at times, but he’s meticulous,” Allen said.
Wilkins looked at the floor.
“Then he’s working with someone,” Ray blurted.
“Okay, okay. I know you’re upset. Your wife is gone, and she was in this guy’s care…” Wilkins said.
Ray interrupted. “Look, Detective, I know how it sounds.”
“Yeah. It sounds bad. Like I said, I wanted to come here and arrest you, but you’re obviously not the guy. If you hear anything else, or get any more weird emails, let me know, but please, don’t try and do anything else on your own. Going to that girl’s apartment was not only stupid, but dangerous. Whoever did this could have also gotten to you.”
Ray grabbed his cell from the counter and opened his email just to check while they were still there. The detectives watched him in anticipation. Ray sank when his screen came up blank. “Nothing,” he said.
Wilkins gave a silent nod. He stood up and motioned for Allen to follow him out the front door. Once past the threshold, he turned. “If I need any information about Miss Black, I can come to your office?”
“Anything at all I can do, you just ask,” Ray said.
Then he closed the door and leaned on it, watching out the sidelight as the police car drove away. He stared blankly out that window for quite some time, thinking about his wife and now poor Courtney. The phone in his hand buzzed. A new email was there.
Fix the child breakfast, Ray. If you contact my friend Frank again, it will be her last.
J.
Ray dropped his phone and ran up the stairs to find Stephanie playing quietly with a homemade dollhouse. She was surrounded by bits of construction paper and covered in glitter glue. Also in on the game were a few action figures and dolls, and of course, the stuffed monkey.
“Daddy, I’m hungry,” she said. “Bananas is hungry, too.”
“I know. Come on downstairs.”
Ray trotted down the steps and she came lazily behind him, holding the handrail as she was taught. Ray looked out the kitchen window, searching for the intense eyes of Dr. James Babbit, but didn’t find him waiting to pounce through the glass. He opened the refrigerator and pulled out a gallon of milk, then grabbed the cereal.
“Pancakes!” she chanted.
“Not today,” Ray said. “Today we have things to do.” He filled a bowl and stuck it on the table with a spoon before walking to the front window. There were no cars or people that shouldn’t be out there. It was quiet, almost abnormal outside, the way the woods go silent when something large and hungry walks through them.
“Hurry up, baby. We’re going to see Grandma today.”
Ray wasn’t sure what his plan was, but something had to be done. His cell phone was on the floor, its battery and cover popped loose. He gathered the parts, put it back together and h
oped it still worked. When it booted back up, he opened his wallet, fished out the business card and dialed Dr. Babbit’s office number.
It rang while he poured his coffee. A woman answered. “I need to speak to James Babbit,” he said.
“Sir, Dr. Babbit is unavailable at the moment…”
Ray interrupted, maintaining calm as best he could, “Ma’am, tell him Ray Noonan is on the phone and I’m sure he’ll be available.”
There was a long pause before she said, “Hold please.”
Ray smiled at his daughter, who grinned back. It was a full grin covered in bits of Froot Loops. A grin that told Ray they might just survive the loss of his wife, her mother, if only he could protect her from that awful man. Shuffling sounds on the phone caught Ray’s attention and as he heard the man’s voice on the phone, he stepped out of the kitchen and into his living room for privacy.
“Good morning Mr. Noonan.”
“Cut the shit,” Ray whispered.
“I’m sorry?”
“You heard me, Babbit. Are you just getting to work? Tired from a late night?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Mr. Noonan?”
Ray heard what sounded like an office door closing in the background. “You know exactly what I’m talking about.”
“Easy, Noonan. I was just going to say that it wasn’t so much a late night as it was an early morning. In her weakened state, Courtney didn’t cause too much trouble. In fact, she didn’t struggle much at all after her first leg came off. It was hard to keep her conscious after that.”
“You are the devil.”
“No, but I should be. Ray, I know you’re mad at me, but patients die on operating tables every day. There’s such great responsibility heaped on the shoulders of doctors, especially surgeons. It is always a relief when a loved one gives us permission to make a mistake.”
“Fuck you.”
“Easy, the child is listening.”
Ray covered the mouthpiece and leaned around to check on Stephanie who ate her cereal and hummed quietly to herself.
“Like I was saying,” Babbit continued, “Occasionally, we have to let one slip. It’s rejuvenating. It eases the tension…and there’s no way you can prove it.”
“I could be recording this conversation,” Ray said.
“You aren’t.”
Ray cursed under his breath. He wasn’t recording but should have been. He should have thought of it. “I want this to be over,” he said.
“What are you saying, Ray? You don’t enjoy our little secret? Our chats? What about the emails? I feel like a school girl with a crush, trading notes with you.”
“I want you to leave us the fuck alone.”
“I can live with that. I’ve done a delicious amount of damage to your family. More would just be gluttonous, don’t you think? Besides, I have another patient being prepped right now, must go.”
The line went dead and Ray stood, sweating.
“Dear God let this be over.”
***
Things were quiet for the remainder of the weekend. He took Stephanie to the humane society and found her a wonderfully shaggy mixed-breed dog. She named it Rocko and professed her undying love by dragging it around by its ears or its tail. The dog seemed eager to please her.
“Mommy would love him!” she shouted.
Ray agreed. “Yes, I think she would have.”
I love you. No matter what happens tomorrow, I love you.
“Except for cleaning up his mess.”
Housebreaking wasn’t something he had thought through, but when he called his mother to warn her about the new addition, she was excited.
“Oh, there’s nothing to housebreaking a dog, especially an older dog. I think it was a fabulous idea for her, Raymond.”
“So you don’t mind cleaning up the occasional accident?”
“Well, I won’t enjoy it, but it will be worth the smile on her face. That will be enough payment.”
Ray knew what she meant. He couldn’t let anything happen to that smile. It was the last thing he had that was truly part of Tabby. And the dog served two purposes. The first was companionship and the other was protection. Ray hoped it would make one hell of a racket if anyone came sneaking around their house.
“Mom?”
“What is it?”
Ray watched his little girl romp with the dog and he watched the dog wag its tail with vigor.
“Nothing. I’ll see you in the morning.”
***
On his way into his office, Ray stopped and put his hand on Courtney’s desk. It was covered with flower arrangements. A funeral announcement was taped to the edge so everyone could see it. Several of his colleagues stood around and talked about her, most had tears in their eyes.
Ray closed his door so he wouldn’t have to see the empty desk and sat in his familiar chair. He powered up his monitor and opened the note from Tabby and read it. It calmed him somehow. Upon his second reading, Ray’s desk phone buzzed and the light began to flash. He pushed the intercom button and didn’t get a word out before his boss spoke.
“Morning, Ray. Horrible news, isn’t it? I figured I’d come down and talk to you this morning. How are you?”
“It’s been rough, Alex.”
Alex sighed.
“Hey,” Ray continued. “Do you remember that job that was available at our office in Boston?”
“Yes. It’s still open if you want it. I hate to lose you, but I don’t blame you for looking for a new start.”
“Can you grease the wheels a bit?” Ray said.
“I should be able to. I’ll forward you the info and make some phone calls.”
“Thanks.”
“Hell of a loss. Great women, Courtney and your wife, both.”
Ray hung up the desk phone and looked up just in time to see Detectives Wilkins and Allen at his door. He remembered what the email had said about his daughter’s last breakfast before he waved them in.
“Mr. Noonan, I’m just here to check her things. Have you gotten any more of those emails?” Wilkins said.
Ray ran through the note in his mind. He pictured Stephanie playing with the dog and shook his head. “No. It’s been delightfully quiet since Saturday morning.”
“Good.”
“While you’re here, I’m planning on transferring. I didn’t want it to be some secret. We just need to move forward, Stephanie and I. Is that going to be a problem?”
“Do you mean, will it make you a suspect? No. I can’t blame you,” Allen said. “But we would appreciate it if you kept in touch, at least until we get this sorted out.”
“Do you have any leads at all?” Ray said.
“Not much, but we’re working it. Hey, let us get out of your hair. I’m sure you have work to do.”
“All right. I have your number if I hear anything else,” Ray said. Inside, he was shaking. Outside, putting on his best performance. He shook the detective’s hands and went back to his desk. The detectives were joined by two other officers and they did a respectful job of checking Courtney’s computer, going through her things and speaking to other members of the staff.
Ray watched them through the glass of his office window. It felt like a television show or a film to him, strangely detached on the other side. They took her computer’s hard drive and several other things from her desk and put them in plastic bags. After thirty minutes, they were gone and the flowers were all back in place.
The rest of the morning flashed by like a school of fish dodging a predator. Ray was engrossed in a spreadsheet when someone knocked on his office door. A man in a uniform shirt stood there with a package. His shirt said ‘Joe’.
Ray stood and opened the door. “Yes?”
“Ray Noonan?”
“Yes.”
“Can you sign for this?”
“Who is it from?” Ray asked.
“Says, ‘Keller Automotive’ on the return address.”
Ray nodded and scribbled hi
s name on the electronic signature pad. The delivery man thanked him and handed over a small box, about the size of a school lunchbox. He gave an uncomfortable glance at Courtney’s desk as he left.
Ray took the box to his desk and pulled a letter opener from the top drawer to sever the tape.
“That must have been an amazing presentation after all,” he said as he pulled the flaps open and removed the tissue paper on top. Inside was a stuffed monkey, well-worn and well loved. Bananas. He knew it well. Ray left the monkey in the box and pulled out a folded sheet of paper.
I told you not to speak to the police anymore. Next time it will be something else in the box.
Ray’s fingers dialed his cell phone, calling home as he walked toward the elevator. He kept the box tucked underneath his arm.
“Hello?” Stephanie answered.
“Hi baby. Are you alright?”
The little girl was crying, she didn’t answer him.
“Steph? It’s daddy, are you okay? What’s wrong. Is Grandma there?”
“You did it,” she said amongst the sobs.
He stopped in his tracks. “What? What did I do, baby?”
“You killed my mommy!” She screamed, a high pitched wail of frustration, and the phone hit the floor.
“Stephanie?” Ray’s heart felt like it might burst.
“Ray?” his mother said.
“Mom, what is that all about?”
“I don’t know. We took Rocko for a walk and he got away from her in the park. Stephanie ran after him. She lost her stuffed monkey.”
“Is that what she’s upset about?”
“I guess. I don’t know what that horrible outburst was. She’s probably just upset, you know how kids are. The lost toy just makes her miss Tabby that much more. She’ll be okay.”
“Did you get the dog?” He pushed the button on the elevator a dozen times, trying to hurry it up.
“Oh yes, some nice man caught him and brought him to us. He told Stephanie that her smile ‘looked just like her mother’s’. I told him I was flattered, but I was her…”
“Mom, I’m coming home. I’ll be there soon,” Ray said.
“Well, okay. Raymond, is…”
Ray pocketed his phone and got into the waiting elevator. He tossed the box into his car and drove several blocks just so he could think. One thing flashed through his mind over and over, the email from Tabby. No matter what happens and I’ll see you on the other side.