Page 20 of Fake Boyfriend


  Jake gave a slight bow. “Always happy to be of service.” He propped his chin in his hand mockingly, like a doctor. “What seems to be the problem?”

  “They want this mortal released from my hold and I will be more than happy to oblige … but not without a price. It is up to you to determine the price, my son.”

  As if that was his cue, Gabriel emerged from the shadows.

  “What do you want in exchange for the boy’s life?” he said. A sudden sick feeling gripped me that I couldn’t explain. My brother and sister seemed to be coming forward like sacrificial lambs and I didn’t like the smug expression on Jake’s face.

  “Well, well, so now the Arch is prepared to bargain?”

  “Just name your terms,” Gabriel said tonelessly.

  Lucifer turned his head invitingly toward Jake’s ghost.

  “Go ahead.”

  Ghost or not, Jake wasn’t about to let this moment pass without milking it.

  “Hmm … Let me see,” he said theatrically, drumming his fingers together and enjoying this momentary return to glory. “What shall I ask for?”

  “Make it quick,” Ivy said, almost growling at him. “Before we change our minds.”

  “I’m in no rush.”

  “Jake…” I said warningly.

  “All right.” He held up his hand and laughed. “I propose a trade.”

  “What kind of trade?” I asked.

  “Not with you,” Jake replied dismissively. “For once, this isn’t about you, Bethany. Besides, it wasn’t your hand that killed me.”

  I felt as if someone had kicked me in the chest as I watched his eyes fall on Gabriel. Was he going to ask me to give my brother in exchange for my husband? I opened my mouth to tell him it was never going to happen, when Gabriel stepped in front of me.

  “Let me handle this,” he said. “His vendetta is against me.”

  “But Gabe…” I caught hold of his hand, my voice becoming suddenly soft and child-like. “You’re my brother.”

  “Yes.” Gabriel touched his forehead to mine and a lock of blond hair fell across his eyes. “I’m your brother, so let me do this for you.”

  From the bed, Lucifer let out a cracking laugh and Jake smiled.

  “If we’re all done with the sentimental moment, I’m ready to name my terms.”

  “Go on,” Gabriel replied in a somber tone.

  “His life…” Jake smiled haughtily. “In exchange for your wings.”

  * * *

  AT first I thought I hadn’t heard him right. The demand was too preposterous to be taken seriously. I almost laughed except Lucifer beat me to it.

  “Oh, Arakiel,” he said in between peals of laughter that reverberated around the room. “It’s times like these I’m proud to call you my son.”

  “What did you say?” Ivy asked, her eyes wide with a mixture of rage and surprise. Lucifer tried to adjust his features to look consoling.

  “Don’t worry, they’ll grow back in a few centuries. It just means your brother might be earthbound for a while.”

  Any hopes I’d harbored of a compromise crumbled. They must have known what they were asking of Gabriel was tantamount to extinguishing his existence. Without his wings Gabriel would be forced to live a half-life, devoid of purpose or meaning. Jake knew full well what he was doing—his request had seemed offhanded, but I knew he had given it careful consideration and chosen so as to hurt us all the most. With Gabriel powerless, Ivy would lose her partner and Xavier and I would be minus our protector, our mentor, and our guide. Not to mention, it would throw Heaven into turmoil. If an Arch willingly surrendered his wings to a demon, it was like giving his divinity as a gift—the ultimate sacrifice. It would signify more than I understood and prevent Gabriel’s return to Heaven. He would be doomed.

  “You’re such an ass!” I yelled at Jake. I would have taken a swing at him, but there was nothing for my fist to collide with.

  “Now, now, language.” He wagged a flimsy finger at me. “I think it’s a fair price, seeing as he cost me my life.”

  “You are the only one to blame for your death,” I snapped. “For being so selfish and destructive.”

  “Sticks and stones,” Jake replied with a casual shrug.

  “Why do you want his wings?” I asked, even though I already knew the answer. “What do you get out of it?”

  “Victory,” Jake said. “Satisfaction.”

  “He gets the great pleasure of seeing one of God’s mightiest cut down,” Ivy answered for him.

  “You know me well,” Jake said, winking. “So, deal or no deal? Let’s move this along, I have places to go, people to haunt.”

  “Absolutely not,” I said emphatically. “You’re out of your mind.”

  “This is a travesty,” Ivy added. “He will never allow it.”

  “I accept,” said Gabriel.

  I stopped dead, not believing my ears. I felt like he was speaking some foreign language and his words made no sense. Gabriel turned away, keeping his face hidden, like he didn’t trust his resolve if he allowed himself to look at us. Anguish was written all over his features.

  “Gabriel,” Ivy whispered, edging closer to him. “Please, Gabriel, don’t do this.”

  But he merely held up a hand to stop her. Their eyes locked for a moment and I saw desperation in my sister’s face and a sort of tragic acceptance in my brother’s.

  “Don’t be a martyr!” Ivy cried. “You don’t even know if he’s telling the truth!”

  “A deal’s a deal,” said Gabriel in a voice so flat I almost didn’t recognize it. “He’ll keep his word.”

  “Demons lie!” my sister protested. “You’re too noble for this! You cannot bow to Lucifer!”

  “I’m not bowing to him,” Gabriel murmured. “I’m protecting man, like Our Father would want.” He walked over to the bed and placed his ringed hand on the pillow beside Xavier’s head. “Our love for mankind has long tortured you, hasn’t it, little brother? But I will defend my Father’s creation unto the end.”

  Then I watched him, my brother, the Archangel and warrior, revered by Heaven and earth, fall to his knees. He bowed his head in a gesture of submission that on him looked like an aberration in nature. He slowly unbuttoned his shirt and let it slip to the floor. In the gloom, his magnificent body glowed softly. The room filled with the scent of rain when he unfurled his splendorous wings. They filled the space, feathered and tipped with silver. They looked as heavy as concrete, but I knew they weighed next to nothing. They were as light as gossamer and yet as protective as an arbor in a storm. Daylight began to filter down through an aperture in the wall above him, mingling with his hair like moonlight on the sand.

  “Gabriel, please!” Ivy cried. “We’ll find another way.”

  But her protest went unheeded. I wanted to speak, but couldn’t find the words. I wanted to throw my body over his and shield him, but I knew it would do no good. So I did nothing, but cover my eyes and sob like a child. That was when they came, a crawling mass of fiendish ghouls was unleashed in the basement. Their faces were waxy and the color of cooked crab. They seemed to spring from below us but I couldn’t be sure. They had teeth like carving knives and darting tongues. I noticed they couldn’t stand upright but scuttled across the floor in crouching positions, like huge, monstrous insects. Behind them, stunted wings fanned out like wrinkled parchment.

  Hideous as they were, what they carried terrified me most. In their knotted claw-like hands each gleefully wielded a cutting implement in the form of rusty handsaws.

  20

  Raphael

  GABRIEL didn’t even put up a fight. It was horrifying and heartbreaking to watch. My brother, who was a pillar of strength in my mind, was on his knees succumbing to the will of the demons. They clambered over him, their claws scratching the skin of his back and chest, until all that could be seen of him was his mussed blond hair and the flashes of silver that were his wings.

  The creatures enjoyed the mutilation—that much wa
s clear. They clipped his wings first, sending silver tips floating into the air. Then they began to hack into them and blood the color of liquid amber ran in rivulets, pooling on the dirty floor where it glowed like precious myrrh. The spilling of his blood seemed to incite fervor. The blood of an archangel was reputed to have life-giving properties; one drop could bestow immortality upon the one who consumed it. The vile creatures began to dip their hands in it and used it to anoint their faces. They slurped it up noisily with their darting tongues. All the while they waved their gruesome weapons in the air, reveling in their victory, while in Xavier’s body Lucifer looked on in approval.

  Through it all, Gabriel remained motionless, his head bowed and his eyes closed. The only changes were the color draining from his face, and the dark circles now ringing his rain gray eyes. It must have been painful, excruciating and drawn out, but he refused to give them the satisfaction of making a sound. His lips moved silently and I knew he must be praying for strength.

  Ivy stood paralyzed, tears pouring down her soft cheeks. Gabriel had been her partner for thousands of years. Their bond ran deep and unbreakable. I didn’t know how she could stand it. I moved forward and took her hand, which seemed to shock her out of her trance. I didn’t say anything; I just followed Gabriel’s example, bowed my head and began to pray. In a situation such as this, there was nothing we could do but rely on higher powers. Ivy stared at me for a moment, her eyes full of devastation. But then I felt her fingers tighten around mine and her eyelids fluttered shut. I could feel the combined energy of our prayers passing between our bodies. I felt myself fill up with it, like it was pushing against my walls from the inside, wanting to burst free. Prayer was a powerful force and ours was answered almost immediately.

  Above the cacophony, I heard the sound of screeching tires as a car pulled up outside. The front door slammed and there were footsteps in the hall. The man that appeared in the basement looked nothing like an angel, although I knew he was one. In my mind I always pictured angels to be a variation of my brother, but this one was smaller in stature, with flaming red hair and an open face—much less severe than Gabriel’s. The biggest difference was how surprisingly human he looked.

  I took him in as he came tripping down the stairs and I noticed the dusting of freckles across his nose, the vibrant emerald green cashmere scarf draped around his neck. I caught a whiff of expensive cologne.

  “Raphael,” Ivy whispered. Although it was out of character, she ran and buried her face in his chest. “Thank goodness you’re here.”

  “Well, this party sucks,” said Raphael, extricating himself from her embrace to appraise the damage. “I can’t believe I left a river cruise on the Nile for this.”

  I couldn’t tell whether he was joking until he winked at me. The devils in the meantime had ceased their work and stood frozen and bemused. Raphael gave them a congenial smile before pointing a finger at them and reciting a few words by rote. The bolts shooting from his finger caused them to disintegrate violently before our eyes, leaving behind only little mounds of gray ash. With the devils dispatched, Ivy rushed to Gabriel, who looked on the verge of passing out. Her hands went to work, making crackling sounds as healing currents passed over the ragged parts of his wings. Where she touched I saw skin knit over and wounds close, stopping further blood loss, but the broken quills didn’t grow back. Xavier was lying motionless on the bed. Had Lucifer left him?

  Raphael came toward me with an extended hand. I noticed his tie was patterned with tiny yellow fish.

  “Good to finally meet you, Bethany.”

  “Likewise,” I said, shaking his hand and wondering both how he knew me and what made him think there was time for niceties.

  “Rumor has it that you’re a bit of a rebel.” The way he said it made notoriety sound like a good thing.

  “I guess that’s true,” I mumbled. It was awkward making small talk with this stranger while the lives of my brother and husband hung in the balance.

  “You’re prettier than I imagined you,” Raphael said.

  “Uh … thank you,” I said. “But I don’t really…”

  “Wait, wait, I’ve got one,” he interrupted. “Somebody better call God. Because Heaven’s missing an angel!”

  He burst out laughing and slapped his thigh.

  “What?” I demanded.

  “I found a book,” Raphael explained. “One hundred best pickup lines.”

  “You do know Xavier and I are married?” I narrowed my eyes.

  “How’s that working out for you?”

  “Can we please try to concentrate?” I said. “Xavier’s possessed … if you hadn’t noticed.”

  Raphael continued to stare at me, in no hurry to get started. “You know the best way to get rid of a demon, right?” he asked with a serious face. I caught Ivy rolling her eyes as I shook my head.

  “Exorcise a lot!”

  Ivy caught my expression of dismay. “It’s okay, Beth. He’s famous for his bad jokes. We’re still waiting for him to grow up.”

  “And like Peter Pan I hope to avoid that at all costs,” Raphael declared.

  The idea of an archangel with a sense of humor didn’t gel in my mind. I was hardly in the mood for jokes.

  “Can you help us or not?”

  “’Course I can,” Raphael said. “I’ve got swag.”

  “Great,” I muttered. “Whatever that means.”

  “What it means”—he strode across to me—“is that your brother and sister have been running on reserve power. But don’t worry, I’m fully charged.”

  “And you’re sure you know what you’re doing?” I asked.

  “Trust me.” He winked. “I’m a doctor.”

  Under different circumstances I might have mistaken him for a college kid trying too hard to impress. Finally Raphael focused his attention on the task at hand and gravitated with mild interest toward the bed.

  “Lucifer, what’s up, bro?”

  I blinked in surprise, not quite believing the casual manner in which Raphael was addressing him.

  Xavier’s eyes snapped open and he gave a tight smile.

  “Don’t tell me you’re the backup?”

  “Surprised?”

  “A little,” he admitted. “Aren’t you taking a risk getting involved in this?”

  “Ah, well.” Raphael sighed. “What’s life without a few risks?”

  “No need to tell me,” Lucifer rasped.

  “Anyway”—Raphael clapped his hands together—“I’d love to stay and chat, catch up on old times, but I think we better cut to the chase.”

  Lucifer raised an inquisitive eyebrow. “Go on.”

  Jake’s ghost looked on wordlessly. It was strange to see him present and yet so inactive. He watched, wide-eyed, like a little boy at a pantomime.

  “I’m gonna need the kid back,” Raphael said simply.

  “Sorry, can’t help you.”

  “Let’s not play games. It’s insulting to both of us.”

  “No games. We had a deal and it fell through. Ask Beth.”

  “Look.” Raphael adjusted his cashmere scarf. “We can make this clean and simple or we can make it messy and complicated.”

  “I have no pressing engagements, so let’s go with messy and complicated.”

  Raphael looked nonplussed. “Fine by me but you’re wasting your time.”

  “Am I?”

  “There’s something you don’t know.” Raphael’s tone was slightly teasing.

  “Please do enlighten me.”

  “It’s nothing earth-shattering.” Raphael smiled cheekily. “It’s just that, well, I’m stronger than you.”

  “Are you indeed?”

  Lucifer’s words hung in the air for a moment and then Xavier began to retch. The veins in his neck pulsed and strained as he was gripped by a paroxysm of coughing. We waited for the fit to pass but it showed no sign of abating. Xavier’s eyes rolled back and he gripped the bed rail. A bluish tinge appeared on his lips. Despite his medium stat
ure, when Raphael spoke in his angelic voice, it was as intimidating as thunder.

  “Depart this temple of the Lord! Show your face no more.”

  “He’s choking!” I yelled. “Do something!”

  Raphael ran to break the fetters around Xavier’s wrists and together we helped him sit up. Raphael brought the palm of his hand down hard between Xavier’s shoulder blades, again and again, until the source of the obstruction flew forward. The coughing changed to rasping breaths and Xavier fell back onto the bed. I knew how exhausted he was when his head lolled to one side as if it were made of stuffing. Beside him on the mattress I saw the problem: a handful of grisly talons, blood-stained from where they’d torn his throat. I picked one up to examine it. It was a grayish color and curved with sharp tips as if designed for clutching prey. It looked like it belonged to some predatory bird.

  Raphael seized this hiatus to perform the exorcism rite, speaking in a measured voice but without stopping to draw breath, as if pausing might interfere with the results.

  “I adjure you in the name of your Creator to depart this child of God. Depart, Seducer of Men, Corruptor of Nations, Prince of Darkness. You must bow to a power far greater than yours.”

  “There is no greater.” Lucifer’s voice was already fainter, crackling as though it were reaching us through a bad phone connection.

  “Do not resist. Your plans will come to nothing. Depart now this holy vessel. Stubborn dragon, the longer you delay the harsher your punishment shall be. We repel your power. Yield. Yield!” He repeated the last word like a powerful mantra.

  My heart sank hearing Xavier’s coughing resume. Did this mean defeat? But then I noticed the coughing was different this time. Xavier wasn’t choking; he was trying to expel something. From his open mouth something long, dark, and reptilian emerged. It was black and scaly apart from a white pulsating throat like a frog. It took me a moment to realize it was a snake, as it forced its way out of Xavier’s body, where it must have been coiled deep inside him. It slithered off the bed onto the concrete floor where it writhed and turned, navigating its way along until it found what it was looking for. It settled over a crack that began to widen immediately with a jarring sound. When it was large enough, it swallowed the snake whole with a sucking sound and the crack closed over, leaving only a putrid smell and a black oil stain where it had passed. Jake’s ghost vanished with it.