But the feel of Ash between her legs, the touch of his lips against her own, his hot mouth around her nipple . . . she’d dreamed about this for years.
She cried out when he captured her other nipple between his teeth, nipping gently. Her fingers scraped against his scalp to keep his head against her breasts, and the urge to rip off his clothes, to remove any barrier between them, was burning all her rational thought to dust.
“Not enough,” he muttered. “Need more.”
He fell backward and pulled her on top of him, his hands clawing at her waistband. Just before he could undo the button, Noelle’s voice sounded from behind the door.
“Cate,” the woman called. “We’re loading Jim up in five minutes.”
A curse got lodged in her throat. Every inch of her was throbbing, aching for Ash, but it was difficult to hold on to that arousal at the mention of her father.
Obviously Ash felt the same way because he swiftly pushed to his feet and held out his hand to hoist Cate off the bed.
Neither of them spoke as they smoothed out their rumpled clothing on their way to the door. But their attempts to de-sex themselves failed miserably because Noelle wore a slight smirk when they joined her in the hall.
“Sorry to interrupt,” she said mockingly.
“It’s fine,” Cate answered, averting her gaze in embarrassment. “We were just . . . talking.” She moistened her lips, which felt swollen from Ash’s greedy kisses. “So the doctor said it was safe to move Jim?”
“He wasn’t thrilled, but he signed off on it. Our bigger concern right now is smuggling Jim off this base without alerting Rivera. That bastard has eyes all over this city.”
Noelle walked off without delay, leaving Cate and Ash to hurry after her. When they reached the medical wing, the blonde was already in Jim’s room, standing at the end of the bed glaring down at him.
“If he wasn’t already out of it, I’d smack him upside the head for making this more difficult than it has to be,” she growled without turning around.
“That’s Jim for you. Always trying to get you to do things his way,” Cate said lightly.
“Right. Asshole.” Noelle knocked her fist against the metal frame at the foot of the bed. “Say your goodbyes and be quick about it. We’re on a tight schedule.”
With her heart in her throat, Cate nodded and stepped toward the bed. She picked up Jim’s large hand with its many scars and calluses and hugged it to her chest. This man had been such a powerful presence in her life—both before and after she’d met him. It was too soon for him to go, though. She’d only just begun to know him.
“Jim . . . Dad. This is no time to be sleeping on the job. Noelle’s going to leave you. And me?” She pulled the limp fingers to her lips. “Get better soon or I’ll marry the worst, baddest mercenary alive and we’ll send our operatives out to crash all your missions and steal all your clients.”
“D’s already taken,” Ash remarked dryly.
Cate glanced over and grinned at him but the humor faded as she gently laid Jim’s hand back on the bed. “Do you want a moment?” she asked, gesturing toward Jim.
“Nah. I’ll say something to him when he wakes up. I can be the one person to tell him that I never once thought he was going to kick the bucket. Maybe he’ll give me a raise.” Ash thumped his fist against the bed frame. “You hear that, old man? Stop being a dick and wake up. No prince is going to come along and save your ugly mug.”
Cate snorted.
“We’re ready to roll,” a voice said from the doorway. Holden appeared, wearing a blue jumpsuit. When he strode past Cate, she saw that the words “CableVision” were stitched along the back.
Kane and D walked in a moment later, wearing similar jumpsuits and holding a backboard that they lined up next to the bed.
“On my count,” Holden said. “One. Two. Three.” On three, he and Ash lifted Jim’s body and shifted him from the bed to the waiting backboard.
Holden unhooked the IV and laid the bag at Jim’s side. At his sharp nod, Kane and D carefully maneuvered Jim out of the small room and down the hallway. Cate followed silently, her heart aching at the sight of her big, strong father in such a vulnerable position.
Out in the main courtyard, two satellite trucks idled on the dusty ground. Timo Varela was already out there, clad in military fatigues and sporting a regretful expression.
“I really am sorry I can’t let you use one of our choppers,” he was telling Noelle, “but it would raise too many red flags, especially since you want to leave the country unnoticed.”
“It’s fine,” she answered briskly. “We’re more comfortable taking our own jet anyway.”
Varela glanced at Jim’s unconscious body in dismay as the men carted the stretcher toward one of the waiting trucks.
Cate noticed that Noelle looked equally distressed, which told her the woman must really be worried, because she never revealed a sliver of emotion if she could help it.
Swallowing, Cate walked over and touched Noelle’s arm. “You should go with him.”
Noelle bit her lip.
“Go,” Cate urged. “I know you trust Kane—I do too, of course—but you’ll feel a lot better if you’re with him. And it’s only a few hours there and back. You’ll be back in Guatana before midnight.”
After another long beat, Noelle gave a decisive nod. “You’re right. Fuck it. I’m going.”
She hid a smile. “Good. Now get in the truck and make sure nothing happens to my dad—”
Noelle was marching off before Cate had finished her sentence.
A soft chuckle had her turning her head. She found Ash standing beside her, looking amused. “I swear, you’re one of the few people who can get away with giving that woman orders. Anyone else, she’d pull a gun on.”
“I’m very skilled at dealing with alphas,” Cate said with a sigh.
She started to shift her gaze back to the trucks but Ash lightly grasped her arm to stop her. “Cate. About what happened before Noelle interrupted . . .”
Her shoulders tensed. Of course. He was about to tell her what a big, fat mistake it had been. That he’d kissed her, touched her, because of some bout of temporary insanity. That she was an inexperienced little girl and the mighty David Ashton didn’t fuck girls—he fucked women.
“What about it?” she said tersely.
“I don’t—”
“Ash,” Kane called from across the courtyard. “Need to talk to you before we go.”
Resignation flashed in his eyes. “We’ll talk later,” he murmured before darting off in Kane’s direction.
Cate stared after him in frustration. I don’t . . . He didn’t what, damn it? Didn’t regret kissing her? Didn’t want to do it again? He couldn’t have finished that one measly sentence instead of leaving her here to wonder?
She was so tired of Ash walking away from her. One of these days she was going to tie him down, though what she was going to do with him once she had him secured, she wasn’t sure. Either fuck him or kill him.
Maybe both.
Chapter 25
It was just past nine o’clock when a soft knock sounded on Cate’s door. She barely heard it over the loud thumping of her heart, the hum of anticipation in her blood. She’d been riddled with anxiety all day and evening, wondering when Ash would come to see her. If he’d come to see her.
Despite his assurance that they would “talk later,” he’d kept his distance ever since the others had departed. Cate had spent the day studying the pictures she’d taken of Camila Rivera, searching for any clue that might lead them to the location of the woman’s husband.
Another rap on the door alerted Cate to the fact that she hadn’t responded. “Yeah?” she called.
“It’s Ash,” he said unnecessarily.
“Come in.”
Nervously, she smoothed her hands d
own the front of her shirt. With Ethan, Juliet, and D handling surveillance tonight, Cate had no reason to leave the base, so she’d already changed into pajamas, which consisted of a tank top and teeny cotton boxers, both thin enough to make her feel like she wasn’t wearing anything at all.
Ash opened the door and shut it quietly behind him. He was still dressed in pants, boots, and a tight T-shirt, but his hair was wet. Had he showered? On closer inspection, she realized his chin was clean-shaven too. The perpetual scruff he sported was gone.
Cate rose and walked over to him. In an almost involuntary reflex, she reached up to touch his face. The skin felt soft beneath her fingers. “You shaved,” she said dumbly.
He rubbed a hand over his jaw. “Yeah.”
Her core began to throb. A man didn’t shower and shave for the fun of it. This could only mean one thing.
Heart thudding a million miles a minute, Cate searched his eyes and found what she was looking for. Heat. Desire. “What were you going to say earlier? Before Kane called you over.”
Ash didn’t shy away from her imploring gaze. “Twenty years.”
She blinked. “What?”
“I was going to tell you that I don’t want to be like Noelle and your dad.” His throat bobbed as he swallowed. “I don’t want you and I to dance around each other for another twenty years.”
Warmth flooded her heart. “Neither do I.” She started to reach for him but he took a maddening step back.
“No.” When her mouth opened in outrage, he corrected himself. “Not yet. I mean it, Cate. If we’re really going to do this, we need to talk about a few things first.”
“Seriously? I might not be a man whisperer like Noelle’s chameleons but since when do men want to talk when they can be naked?”
Ash snickered before going serious again. “Humor me, okay? Because this needs to be said.”
“Fine.” She waved a hand. “Talk away.”
He drew a deep breath, then exhaled in an unsteady puff of air. “Last year . . .” He inhaled again. “The night I found you naked in my room . . .”
Her stomach twisted at the memory. “What about it?”
“I lied to you that night. Every single word I said was a goddamn lie, sugar.” Remorse floated across his handsome face. “I was trying to push you away. I knew Morgan didn’t want the two of us hooking up, and I said all that shit because I wanted you to hate me. I wanted you to get over me.”
“I suspected as much.” Another knot formed inside her. “But . . . it hurt, Ash. It really fucking hurt.”
“I know.” He moved closer as if he was going to touch her, changed his mind, and took a step back. “You have no idea how sorry I am. That look on your face when I . . .” He swallowed. “It haunts me.”
She fisted her hands on her hips. “So you pushed me away back then. Why aren’t you pushing me away now? It’s not like Jim is suddenly waving around a flag of approval. What’s changed?”
“Twenty years,” Ash repeated through clenched teeth. “I just told you—I’m not willing to torture the both of us for twenty fucking years. I want you. I wanted you from the moment I met you, and I don’t give a shit if it’s wrong.”
A smile curved her lips. “Then why are you still not touching me?”
His low growl heated the air. “Because I’m not done talking.”
“Do that again.”
“Do what?” he said warily.
“That growling thing. It’s hot.”
Now he grumbled in frustration. “Would you just let me finish?”
“Sorry. Go on.” Her hand made a zipping motion across her mouth.
“So yeah . . . I told you how I feel,” he said awkwardly. “Now I need to tell you how I am.”
She eyed him in confusion. “What does that mean?”
“It means I’m not like those young college guys you’re used to.” His cheeks hollowed as if he was grinding his molars together. “I’m not gentle or sweet when it comes to sex. I have a filthy mouth. I can be rough. I—”
“Why are you telling me all this?” she interjected, sputtering with laughter.
“Because I want you to know what you’re getting into. What I’m like in bed.” He shifted his feet. “I want to make sure you can handle it, that it won’t scare you away.”
Grinning, she gripped the hem of her tank top and slowly dragged the thin material upward. “Tell me—do I look scared?”
The shirt hadn’t even cleared her head before Ash was on her. His hands fondled her bare breasts roughly, summoning a gasp from her lips.
“This what you want, Cate?” he demanded. “What you really want?”
“Yes,” she answered breathlessly.
“Yeah? You want my cock inside your pussy? You want me to suck on your tits until you squirm and then fuck you with my tongue? Because once I start, I’m not gonna fucking stop.”
She curled her fingers around his biceps, her body clenching in desire at every lust-drenched word. But she couldn’t be passive here. Ash already thought that she was too young for him, too inexperienced. She had to meet him word for word, thrust for thrust.
“What about you, Ash?” she challenged. “You want my mouth on your cock? You want my fingers in your ass?”
His expression lit up. “So it’s going to be that way, is it?” he said with a chuckle.
“Yeah. It’s going to be that way.”
Still laughing, he pulled his T-shirt off with one hand while the other dropped to his pants. Somehow he was able to toe off his boots, ditch the pants, and back her toward the small twin bed in one fluid motion. Then he reached down and gripped his impressive erection.
“You sure about this?” he muttered, his eyes blazing with unadulterated lust. “Because I haven’t had a woman in a long time and I need this so fucking bad. Three days from now you’ll still be aching from the pounding I’m about to give you. This isn’t going to be sweet or pretty. Last chance, sugar.”
His Southern accent crept in, slurring his words together like melted syrup. Cate wanted to lie back on the bed and bathe in them. And his intentionally coarse words did nothing to scare her off. They only wound her up tighter.
She smiled at him. “I don’t care.” Then she threw herself on the bed and spread her legs. “Do your worst, baby.”
He growled again, and damned if that didn’t make her hotter.
She’d never felt so ready in her life, and yet when Ash climbed onto the bed, kneeling above her like some conquering lord, a frisson of apprehension spiked into her. She’d never seen him like this. Features stretched harshly across his skin, dark red color riding high on his cheekbones, pupils black with arousal. And his cock hung heavy and hard, sending a rush of moisture to her core.
Cate’s inner muscles clenched in anticipation. She’d wanted this for as long as she could remember. She’d spent four years fantasizing about this moment, and she was reveling in the fact that he hadn’t been with anyone for a long time, that he was going to take her rough and hard.
“Fuck me,” she begged when he still hadn’t moved.
The words acted like a switch. One moment he was still and the next he was curling his lean, muscular body over her. He palmed one breast as he took the other one in his mouth, the deep suction sizzling right down to her pussy. Her knees came up to trap him between her legs. The throb in her core needed his thigh, his hand, his tongue. Shit, anything.
She writhed in agitation as he bit and sucked and kissed every inch of her breasts. He tongued her nipples until they were so hard it was almost painful. They were aching. Everything was aching.
“Ash, please.”
“You hungry, sugar? You need something?” His words were mocking but his face belied the light tone. Every taut plane of his body screamed of a man in need.
“You,” she whispered. “I need you. Inside of m
e. Now.”
Her hands fumbled with her boxers, but he brushed her fingers away and wrenched the shorts down. He left her lacy panties on.
“Jesus. You wear these skimpy things all the time under your clothes?”
A strong hand cupped her and Cate squirmed against the grip. She wanted him to remove that last layer between them and shove something, anything inside her. “Y-yes. Why?”
“Those college boys see this, Cate? You show these fuck-me panties to those punk-ass, pink-shirt-wearing boys?”
“What?” She couldn’t understand what he was talking about. Her mind was foggy from arousal, spurring her to desperately reach between them for his cock.
He shifted out of reach. “Answer me,” he ordered. “How many of those assholes have seen you like this?”
“None,” Cate hissed. “None of them. I didn’t let even one of them touch me.”
No, it wasn’t until she’d been in the field that she’d finally accepted that Ash wouldn’t be her first. She’d given her V-card to a reporter, more out of loneliness than desire, and it had never, ever felt like this. She’d never felt this alive. Every nerve ending tingled. Every cell crackled with awareness. Every part of her was desperate for release.
“Right answer,” Ash drawled, and then he shoved her panties aside and thrust two fingers inside her.
The orgasm came without warning. Cate couldn’t help it, couldn’t stop it. Ash had detonated the fuse that had been burning for four years, and her back arched off the bed as a wave of pleasure rocked through her.
“Fuck. You are so fucking tight.”
Her eyes flicked open to see him staring at his fingers tunneling in and out of her. His teeth were clenched and sweat beaded on his forehead. The muscles in his chest and arm rippled as he pumped her with his hand.
“Give me more. Don’t hold out on me,” she pleaded. The man had her pinned to the bed with two fingers, but she still wanted more. She needed, lusted after his cock. And she wasn’t leaving this bed until she got it.
Chuckling, he withdrew his fingers. “Just making sure you’re ready.”