Words weren’t necessary between us at this point. I knew her body, her needs, almost better than my own. We reached the tipping point at the same time and I couldn’t believe anything in life would ever get better than this.
As soon as I moved, she twined herself around me. “I’m sorry I almost blew that off to work. Thank you for the reminder that the magic isn’t gone.”
I kissed the top of her head. “So you’re not ready to hand me my walking papers?”
Annika bit my chest.
“Ouch.”
“Oh, shut it, hockey player. Why would you think I was done with you?”
Because you haven’t even mentioned that the main thing keeping us from going public with our relationship is no longer an issue. “Because I wouldn’t blame you. I worry about this beautiful butterfly I’ve trapped in a box. And I know she’s claustrophobic, but even then I can’t let her go.”
“You sweet, sweet man. You get me in every way that’s important to me and I’ve never been happier than I’ve been with you these past seven months. Do I wish we could go out and see a movie or try a new restaurant? Sometimes. But you are gone a lot, and when you are here, I’m selfish. I get your undivided attention. We don’t have people interrupting and asking for your autograph at my dining room table.” She ran her finger around the outside of my nipple. “I have all sides of you in private. In public I get Robo Axl. We are much more solid in our relationship now because we had the time and privacy to build it our way—without input from family, friends or colleagues. I never question anymore whether it’s real.”
“I love you.”
“And then there’s that. I never get tired of hearing it.” She kissed my sternum and placed a string of openmouthed kisses progressively lower down my chest. When she’d positioned herself over my groin, she smirked at me. “Speaking of worked over . . . let’s see if there’s any magic left in this stick of yours.”
Turned out, there was.
Twenty-nine
___
ANNIKA
The double life I led was getting to me.
I couldn’t even have my friends over to get ready for our girls’ night out because they’d see Axl’s stuff all over my apartment. Then I became petulant when I imagined moving it because I didn’t want to move it; Axl’s stuff belonged here. With my stuff.
So I’d packed my makeup, outfit and shoes in my suitcase and rolled it to the door. When I bent down to slip on my snow boots, my necklace swung forward. I should probably take it off so I didn’t have to answer questions about when and where I’d bought it, and if the white diamond-encrusted A on the front entwined with the black diamond-encrusted A on the back meant anything special . . .
Tears stung my eyes. I couldn’t even wear the beautiful necklace my man had designed for me.
Screw it. I was wearing it.
Besides, I’d be in the line of fire a lot more if they saw my Wild underwear. But it was game night and since I couldn’t kiss him good luck in the arena, wearing his number on my ass had become our tradition and I wasn’t breaking it even for girls’ night out.
We were meeting at Brady and Lennox’s place for some food and pregame action before we started barhopping. I would’ve been content to pick one bar—preferably a sports bar so I could keep an eye on the hockey game—and stay there all night. But this was a belated celebration welcoming Trinity into the family. She and Walker had been married several months, but between the holidays and Jensen’s injury, we hadn’t thrown her a belated bachelorette party like we had for Lennox.
I wasn’t sure who Lennox and Dallas had invited beyond their edict of “no dudes.” I had a pang of sympathy for Axl and his promise of “no WAGs” the night of the party from hell.
The car service dropped me off at Brady and Lennox’s funky warehouse and I had a funny tickle in my belly when I noticed an actual party bus.
Only one person I knew ever had crazy ideas like that. Cara, who’d instantly become my BFF in third grade when we discovered we had matching Powerpuff Girls backpacks. But she’d moved to Thailand a year and a half ago to become a master chef.
The front door opened. Cara tossed her arms up in the air and called out, “Surprise!”
“Cara? What in the world are you doing here?”
Dallas, Lennox and Trinity spread out in a line beside her.
Lennox said, “You know how your brothers and cousins staged an intervention when one of the Lund boys was being a dumb-ass? Well, we’re doing the same thing for you. Annika Lund, you are the shit, girl! Scoring Haversman as a client! I cannot believe you don’t want to shout that accomplishment from the motherfucking rooftops. So guess what? We’re doing it for you tonight.”
“What? This isn’t a belated bachelorette party?”
“Nope. This party is for you,” Dallas said. “Congratulations! Come on in and see who’s partying with us tonight.”
Taken aback, I burst into tears.
After I had hugged Cara a million times, Dallas forced me to do a shot of Kinky.
I sat on the barstool in the kitchen, trying to catch my breath and wrap my head around all this. Everyone was staring at me. “What?”
“Dude. The ‘Iron Princess’ cries. We just wanted a moment to take in history.”
I flipped Dallas off.
Lennox moved to my right side. “I think you know everyone. We put together a fun group of professional women who wouldn’t have any problem shouting ‘Girl Power!’ every time we do a shot in your honor tonight.”
I squinted at Cara. “This has to have been your idea.”
“Damn straight. Now intro your new posse, A.”
New posse. Right. After Cara had moved I’d gone into a friend funk. I missed her like crazy and hadn’t seen the need to audition possible new BFFs, so I’d thrown myself into work for the past year and a half. So seeing that the only friends I had here were actual work friends depressed me. The only new friend I’d made was Verily, and Dallas couldn’t invite her without explaining how I knew her, which depressed me even more.
Snap out of it. This is a celebration. Act enthusiastic even if you have to fake it.
“From the work side first.” I pointed to my assistant. “You remember Deanna. She still runs my life. You met my sis-in-law Lennox; she’s also in PR at LI now.” I shook my finger at Lucy. “No hiding behind Lennox tonight. Lucy is in graphic arts at LI. You know Dallas.” Then I squinted. “Zosia? What the . . . ? They let you off the boat?”
She laughed.
I hopped off the stool and ran forward to tackle-hug her. “I’m so glad they invited you and that you came, you jerk. I haven’t seen you in forever.” I faced the group. “This is my cousin Zosia—she’s shy. Oh, unless she’s got a fishing pole or a net in her hand and then she is mean. She runs Lund Fisheries in Duluth.”
“Someone has to crack the fishing line on those guys.”
Then Lennox took over intros for me at that point. “On the couch with the gorgeous dreads is my friend Kiley. Next to her is Lola, my former boss at LI and next to her is Sydney, one of my LI coworkers. Trinity? You want to take it from here?”
“Sure. Next to me is my BFF, Gen, who is also a newlywed. Sitting next to her is Betsy. She runs Walker’s office. Next to her is Tiffany, whose husband is Walker’s partner.”
“Hey. I’m preggers, so I’m driving the bus, which means we will stop for as many pee breaks as y’all want.”
I looked around the room and got weepy again. “I can’t believe all of you are here. Thank you for letting your friends rope you into this.”
Lola, the oldest of the group, stood. “When Lennox asked me if I wanted to come, I thought, what the hell? It’s a night out drinking with a bunch of hot young girls. Maybe some old dudes will get tired of getting blown off by them, and I’ll get lucky for a change.”
Everyone laughed.
“But after I’ve been here and talked with these ladies, half of whom I didn’t know before tonight, I gotta say
, this is a damn fine group of women. We aren’t all executives, but we’re all proud of what we do, and it’s great to see us celebrating together.”
Cara said, “Girl Power!”
“Girl Power!”
Then Cara slapped me on the ass. “Go get ready.”
Dallas said, “Cara, go with her and keep her on task.” She smirked and handed me an empty shot glass. “After she has another one of these.” She filled it with Kinky.
I knocked it back like a pro.
Lennox directed us to the spare bedroom.
Cara carried in our drinks—we were moving on to the margaritas now—and I unfolded my suitcase on the bed. She whistled. “That is a hot outfit.”
“Thanks.” I’d brought gray leather pants along with a black silk halter. The shirt had no back, which was why the fur stole went so perfectly with it. “I cannot believe you’re here! How long are you staying?”
“Just tonight. I leave in the morning.”
“What? You came all the way from Bangkok for one night?”
“I’ve been in L.A. for a week. But I seriously worked seventy hours in that week. The chef is a major twat waffle, but he’s also a culinary genius, so it’s been fantastic. I had this one night free and thankfully it worked into everyone’s schedule.”
I hugged her again. “I miss you! How much longer will you be over there?”
“Not sure. But it’ll be a few years until I’m seasoned enough to run a kitchen in the States. You’ll have to visit me.”
I whipped off my shirt and attempted to get the halter top on. Nope. I needed help.
Cara was right there, lifting my hair. “You don’t look super happy for the huge coup you just scored for LI.”
“I’m thrilled.”
“She says with no enthusiasm whatsoever,” Cara said dryly. She moved to stand in front of me and straightened the straps on my halter. Of course she noticed the necklace. “This is stunning.”
“Thank you.”
“It’s from him?”
“Yes. I never wear it out. Tonight I felt . . . defiant.”
Her eyes, such a unique mix of hazel and gray, locked on to mine. “I feel privileged that you told me about him, A.” She paused. “No one out there knows about you two?”
“Just Dallas. Jensen knows because he caught us together.” I groaned. “He and Axl are buddies now, which is weird. Axl’s friends Martin and Verily, who live across the hall from him, know. The upside of that is I don’t have to skulk around Axl’s apartment building.”
“All this sneaking around for months . . . it’s been worth it?”
“He’s worth it. I love him. I don’t doubt his love for me.”
“So how much longer does this sneaking around have to go on?”
“Not sure,” I hedged. She didn’t know the Haversman deal had been the holdup. Now that it wasn’t an issue, I hadn’t figured out a way to approach it with Axl. He seemed content with the way things were, and that scared me. But he was near the end of the season. He needed to focus on that. We’d waited this long; a few weeks more wouldn’t matter. Would it?
She lifted up our margarita glasses for a toast. “You are a lucky pucker. Skål.”
I laughed. “Skål.”
• • •
The bus ride turned out to be wild fun. Cara led sing-alongs until we reached our destinations.
I had a few drinks but nothing like the rest of the crew, who were feeling no pain when we arrived at the fourth bar.
“Where are we?” Deanna asked.
“Flurry!” Dallas said, clapping her hands and directing the group off the bus like a chipper tour guide.
I hadn’t been here in months. Since the Axl incident. This was not my favorite bar—it never had been—and I couldn’t understand why Brady and Lennox loved it or why Dallas and Nolan were regulars. I suspected we were here so my brothers could spy on their wives.
Lennox had reserved the VIP section, so we all trooped upstairs. The music didn’t suck for once. I’d checked the hockey score three times, finding out in the last update that the team had won and Axl had scored a goal. It boosted my good mood even further—he always had such inventive ways of us celebrating when he scored on the ice.
I tried to spread out and talk to everyone in our group, but I spent most of my time with Cara and Zosia. Guys were relentless in hitting on us. I hadn’t missed that at all in the past few months of being exiled from the social scene with Axl.
I’d been nursing the same drink for an hour and tried not to yawn.
So I wandered around. Lola and Kiley were out in front of the dance floor leading a group dance. Deanna, Sydney and Betsy were entertaining yet another group of guys who were hitting on them. Lucy, Tiffany and Gen were in a serious discussion. I didn’t see Lennox. Or Trinity. Or Dallas.
I turned down four guys asking, “Hey, baby, where you goin’?” on the way to the bathroom and decided to take my time before returning to the bar scene.
When I stepped out of the restroom, I felt immediately that the energy in the bar had changed. The entire upper level had filled with people. The bass from the music started vibrating the railings, the floors and the ceiling.
Oddly enough, I didn’t usually get claustrophobia in crowd situations. But it seemed as if the room had become half the size and was crammed with five times as many people.
Then they dimmed the lights.
Breathe.
Don’t move.
The room is not closing in.
The oxygen is not evaporating from all the extra body heat.
Then I remembered my necklace.
Any dark place, Annika. I’m always there with you.
My scalp tingled with a new sensation, and I opened my eyes to see what had changed.
At that moment I spotted Axl across the room from me.
Those knowing eyes assessed everything about me all at once.
The way I’d curled into myself.
My hand at my throat.
He probably could tell my respiration rate.
He started toward me.
Heaven help anyone who got in his way.
I wouldn’t say the crowd parted for him, but it pretty much did.
Once he’d passed through the throng, no one turned around and gawked or paid him attention.
Not that Axl would’ve noticed. Not that Axl would’ve cared.
My beautiful man, the way you’re coming at me, with that look on your face, puts the spectacle in spectacular.
Axl rested his hand at the base of my throat and covered my hand gently with his own. “How bad?”
“Better now that you’re here.” I swallowed hard. “Why are you here?”
“Not my choice. Jensen pulled some strings and got the whole team in.”
“My brother is here? With this many people around and wearing a brace?”
“No. He just set it up.” He leaned in. “I don’t want to talk about Jens.”
“Axl, I love you.”
He froze—not from my declaration, because me confessing my love for him wasn’t new, but it wasn’t like me to blurt it out angrily like an accusation.
“I want everyone to know I love you. I want everyone to know