Page 16 of Fate


  I submit, my dear Candy, that you are indeed a slut according to this definition. So am I.

  Yes, you’ll be staying with me and in my bed. When you’re not in my bed, we’ll be at the club. I hope you have no aspirations to visit Disneyland. The only ‘Candy in Wonderland’ ride you’re getting, is going to be on or under me.

  I promise that I won’t hate you once I know your secrets. Nothing could make me hate you. Have you had a sex change or something? I only wonder because this issue keeps coming up. What could you have done that’s so bad? Why don’t you tell me now and get it over with?

  I think you’re perfect. Perfect for me.

  I hope you slept well last night.

  Paul

  P.S. When I sleep I dream of you.

  ~~~

  Wow. Mechanically, Emily finished cooking and ate her breakfast while almost unaware of doing so. All of her attention remained on Paul.

  Opening her bag, and making sure her mom wasn’t anywhere nearby, she pulled out the photos she took of him for the first time that day. Emily never tired of seeing those pictures. This was another shameful secret, but she consoled herself that it was ‘art.’

  Was that shaded part on Paul’s face stubble? A flush of lust rolled through her as she remembered the feel of that stubble, rough against the soft skin of her nether lips and thighs. God, he was such an amazing lover.

  Emily flipped happily through her pictures. It seemed that every time she looked at them, she noticed something new. Paul was so beautiful, and now that she knew him better than before, she was even more obsessed with him. But he was obsessed with Candy.

  If only he felt this way about me! I am perfect for him. We’re perfect for each other. It has to be fate. We were born to be together. Everything will work out. It has to!

  Emily floated on her unstoppable high, right until her phone rang. It was then that she found out that Paul’s father, Tom Jarman, had suffered a heart attack.

  He was on his way to surgery.

  Chapter 30. Homecoming

  From: Candy

  To: Paul Jarman

  Subject: Trust and Love

  So ‘love’ for you is all about trust? Genuinely knowing and trusting the person you love? Trust them enough to expose yourself and let them get to know you?

  Still Confused

  ~~~

  From: Paul Jarman

  To: Candy

  Subject: Trust and Love

  That’s about it. The problem is that I don’t really trust anyone.

  Paul

  ~~~

  From: Candy

  To: Paul Jarman

  Subject: Ouch

  That's sad. You must be really lonely. Maybe we can learn to trust each other.

  That Hopeful Cabo Girl

  ~~~

  From: Paul Jarman

  To: Candy

  Subject: Hopeful

  I’m looking forward to seeing you again, and yes, that’s the plan. To see how we get on. Actually, I trust my pseudo, adopted little sister, Emily. I saved her life when she was a child, did I tell you that? She works for my dad. Yeah, I guess if there is one person I honestly trust in the whole wide world, it would be her.

  We’ve hardly spent any time together, but you are a very close second.

  Paul

  ~~~

  Paul sat in the hospital waiting room with Emily feeling somewhat numb. When he received the urgent phone call that his dad was in hospital, and he was needed home immediately, his first thought was disappointment because of not being able to meet up with Candy.

  Afterwards, he felt guilty about that, but that was his first thought.

  He wrote Candy an email immediately, telling her about his situation. Explaining that even though they would be unable to meet up next week, at least they’d be living closer to each other.

  “Did you talk to the doctor?” Emily asked quietly.

  “Yeah,” Paul said, instinctively using a soft voice, too. It was just that sort of place, like a church… or a funeral home, he thought darkly. “It was a lot to take in, but I think I got the gist of it. There’s a good chance that he’s going to die. Did the doctor talk to you?”

  “Yesterday, so I’ve had time to look it all up on Google. Do you want the layman’s version?

  “Absolutely.”

  “Your dad had a coronary arterial bypass graft. That means, if I understand correctly, that they’ve taken veins from his leg to replace his coronary arteries. It all seemed to be going well, until he had another cardiac arrest on the table. Right now he’s sedated in ICU.”

  Paul nodded absently. They sat beside each other on visitor’s couches. It was a tired, worn sort of room with well-used furniture, where countless people had waited for news of their loved ones. Paul wondered if his dad would regain consciousness. Did he regret not trying to heal their rift? Right then, he wasn’t even sure what he felt. But it felt damned strange being back in his hometown.

  “Did you tell your mother?” Emily asked.

  “No. Did you tell yours?”

  “Mom was with me when I got the phone call from the hospital. She hasn’t seen your dad for years.”

  Paul nodded, not surprised. Dad had that effect on people, making them want to keep away. It was unreal to think that his dad might die. If he did, Paul would never know why his father did the things he did. Even if the close-mouthed bastard regained consciousness, he probably still wouldn’t tell him anything. One thing was certain, if dad went back to work, it wouldn’t be for years, if at all.

  “Between myself, Ken and Margo, we can keep the supermarket running,” Emily said. “But you’ll have to do your dad’s job. I’ve never dealt with the accounts. He told me once, that if anything ever happened to him, everything’s with his lawyer.”

  “Okay,” Paul replied rather grimly. It all seemed a bit too much to process. Coming home, returning to this whole situation and the baggage and emotions represented. It was difficult to take in.

  “Well then, I guess I’ll go see the lawyer. You still haven’t seen your dad, Emily?”

  “No, he hasn’t come back to Oregon, and I haven’t made the effort to go to California to visit,” she said with a sigh. “I don’t know which of those two to blame more, your mother, who was my mother’s best friend, or my father, who was your father’s best friend.”

  Paul sat up straight, a blaze of concentrated anger blasting through him. He saw Emily flinch before the raw fury of his expression, and fought to restrain himself. “That’s an easy one for me, Emily. I blame my father. He pushed my mom away with both hands. I wouldn’t have stayed with him either, if I were her.”

  Emily’s brittle laugh had no humor in it. “Fair enough. I just wish that when your mother left, that she hadn’t gone off with my father. Couldn’t she have found someone else to run away with? My mom is still a total basket case.”

  Paul shook his head, his dark temper smoldering inside. “I wonder how long your dad and my mom were having an affair? Weeks, months, years? Isn’t it weird that we never saw any sign of it? Accomplished actors, both of them. The only innocent in the whole stupid equation was your mom.”

  “My mother was hardly innocent,” Emily said. “She can be pretty difficult to live with.”

  “Really? She was always great with me.”

  “That was one of the best things about our two families always being together,” Emily said. “Both of our parents were always on their best behavior. You never got to see the worst side of my mom, and I guess I never got to experience the lousy side of your dad.”

  Whenever Paul thought of his parents, he felt nothing but anger and betrayal. “Liars. Your dad, and my mom and dad, they’re all such fucking liars!”

  “That’s harsh, Paul. Sometimes people fall in love, it isn’t always planned or expected. It just happens. They get obsessed with one another and don’t know what to do about it. I think they stayed with their married partners for us, the kids, don’t you think?’’

/>   Paul snorted. “You think we should just excuse them and say that they’ve been in love for years? If I hadn’t already been five years old when we moved to Devil’s Lake, I’d be wondering if we were brother and sister.”

  Emily’s face flashed, bright with alarm. “Jesus, Paul! Don’t say that!”

  Paul laughed, and this time it was genuine. “Don’t worry about it, rabbit,” he said with a smirk, reaching over to fluff her hair. Frowning, Emily stiffened and drew back from him, so he dropped his hand. “Don’t take it so seriously. I was joking! I don’t look like my dad, but I don’t look like your dad, either. I may think of you like the little sister I never had, but there’s no way that we’re related.”

  Emily’s tension was palpable, and for the first time since his arrival, Paul really looked at her. “You cut your hair,” he said, stupidly stating the obvious. In a jerky, self-conscious movement, Emily ran her hand through her soft brown locks, tucking them behind one ear. “And you look different without your glasses.”

  Her lips curved up in a faint smile. “Can’t beat laser surgery,” she said with a shrug.

  “You look terrific.”

  Emily rolled her eyes skeptically at that comment. God, she’s changed, Paul realized. Why hadn’t he noticed?

  Dressed in jeans and a baggie, green Oregon Ducks sweatshirt, those clothes couldn’t hide Emily’s figure. His little rabbit had filled out over the last three years. She wasn’t wearing makeup, and her face looked drawn and tired. Her eyes were bloodshot. No doubt she’d been crying for his dad. At least someone should. That was another thing to feel guilty about.

  “You’ve had a hard time, haven’t you, rabbit?” he said, patting her knee.

  Emily sniffed, and pulled a tissue out of her bag to wipe her eyes. “I just didn’t get that much sleep last night,” she said. “I’m not usually this emotional.”

  Jai strode into the room just then, with two big bags of food. Marilyn Banes followed close behind him. Surprised, Paul stood up, in greeting.

  “Oh, Paul! I just heard,” Marilyn said throwing herself into his arms and wrapping herself around him sympathetically. “Is there anything I can do? You know I’ll be there for you, Paul. Old friends like the two of us need to stick together.”

  There was just something about Marilyn, Paul thought, completely diverted from the possible sudden demise of his father. His eyes met Jai’s over her shoulder in a moment of perfect male understanding. Neither of them could stop smiling. Marilyn’s big beautiful breasts felt as good as ever against his chest, and his arms wrapped perfectly around that hourglass figure of hers. It was nice to be reminded of something pleasant and familiar from his hometown.

  He clasped her upper arms and stood back from Marilyn, just about having to wrench her away, Paul said, “Jai, have you met Marilyn Banes?”

  Jai grinned at his friend. “We introduced ourselves on the way here, when we met in the elevator. Marilyn tells me that you and she are friends, and have always had a special relationship.”

  Emily jumped to her feet. “I have to go,” she said abruptly. “If you want me, I’ll be at home. Tomorrow, I’ll be at the supermarket, first thing.”

  “Wait, Emily,” Paul called out. He reached for her, but she was already walking out the door. Shrugging, he turned to Jai and asked, “What did you get us for dinner?”

  Jai’s eyes were alight with triumph, and his large grin matched the pure joyfulness of his laugh. “Indian food, of course.”

  Chapter 31. Marilyn

  Marilyn went home from the hospital with Jai and Paul.

  The two men made a habit of sharing willing women, and Marilyn was more than willing. Dark compelling eyes, long thick eyelashes, a great body, passionate and desirable in bed, with breasts big enough to keep four men happy – Marilyn was perfect.

  But she’s no Candy, Paul thought.

  It was clear to Paul, even after all this time, that Marilyn still wanted him. Part of her motivation, he figured, was financial. Marilyn was a girl that judged love according to the gifts given to her, and the cost of each present. Paul was surprised when he didn’t see dollar signs in her eyes. Not that he was complaining. To each their own, after all. And she was sexy, up for anything, and great fun.

  Initially, Paul thought he’d be happy to scene with Jai, acting as a human restraint, without actually having sex with Marilyn. But once it came down to it, his heart wasn’t into it. He honestly had no interest in anyone else, he only wanted Candy.

  Love sick. That’s what I am, Paul decided, disgusted with himself.

  Paul explained that to Marilyn, when Jai went to the bathroom.

  “I’m interested in someone now,” he said, “So, don’t get any ideas. I’m taken. But you might want to think about Jai. His family is fucking loaded, and he’s a great guy. I think you should go out with him. A girl need never worry about anything ever again, if she’s lucky enough to land Jai.”

  “Paul, I only came here because of you,” she whined. “I thought we were having a threesome.”

  “Too bad. It’ll never happen. Do you want me to drive you home?”

  Tilting her head, she looked thoughtful for a moment. “No,” she said with a broad smile. “Your friend’s cute. Listen, I wanted to tell you something, but I don’t want to upset you. It’s about Emily.”

  “What about her?”

  “I go to the supermarket a lot, and I’ve been watching her with your dad.”

  “And?”

  “Paul, she’s trying to get in good with him. I think she’s got him to change his will. She looks so sweet and innocent, but she’s really sneaky underneath all that. I’m just saying that I don’t trust her.”

  Paul burst out laughing. “Marilyn, have you ever noticed that people usually claim that others are guilty of what they’re doing? Not that I think you’re going after my dad’s money. It just seems to me, that if you could, maybe you would.”

  The look of outraged shock on her face was priceless. “Paul,” she said with a hand on her heart. “I would never do that to you.”

  “Of course you wouldn’t, Marilyn.”

  Jai returned, and Paul told him that he was on his own. Jai laughed, deep and low. “You, my friend, are in love,” he said in his tenor British accent. “You have all my sympathy for suffering that condition.”

  Straightening, he looked at Marilyn appraisingly, slipping into a dominant mode. “We’ll miss you tonight, Paul, but I’m sure that Marilyn and I will find some way to deal with the loss, won’t we, gorgeous?”

  Marilyn simpered and struck a sultry pose worthy of a dark haired Marilyn Monroe.

  Paul went to bed by himself, vaguely irritated. Why did some women do that? Bitch and try to cause problems with other women? Was it just jealousy? Or some weird female instinct to cause trouble? One thing Paul knew for certain, Emily was a straight shooter.

  With Emily, what you see is what you get, he thought. The idea that Emily would try to get his dad to change his will? That was beyond crazy.

  ~~~

  Paul rested back on the chair in his dad’s office and gazed out over the supermarket. The office was on the second floor, and the view through the glass window was excellent.

  No wonder dad always had god-like delusions of grandeur, he mused. It’s easy to think ‘I am the captain of all I see’ from up here.

  Paul had always enjoyed working at his dad’s business, mainly because dad left him alone to run the nuts and bolts side of things. Dad focused on profit and loss, and paperwork. It was astonishing how well the business was doing. But why didn’t the crazy old miser spend any of his money? Sure he never pinched pennies on the supermarket. But would it have killed him to spend some of his money on the house, a new car, or himself?

  The passwords for various accounts and programs had all been kept on an Excel. Paul easily broke into that because his father had written the password down and left it on the desk. Idiot.

  Over the last five days, his dad had re
gained consciousness. The medical staff said he was out of danger and had moved him to a less-intensive care ward. He was still in a lot of pain, and drifted in and out. Paul tried talking to him, but as usual, the man didn’t have much to say.

  Clearly, his dad was still mad at his prodigal son, which was fine. Paul felt the same way about him.

  Candy’s emails, once four or five daily, had become few and far between. That was disturbing. Somehow that woman had gotten in under his defenses. He wanted her, both in and out of bed. She made him laugh, think, and smile. Paul always knew something had been missing from his life.

  There was an emptiness in him. Candy filled that absence. It was like she was the missing piece.

  With her, he felt whole.

  Paul asked Candy about her lack of daily emails. She responded that she was busy with work. He sent a ton of questions. No, there was no other man in her life. No, she was not still attending The Basement. Yes, she did want to see him again, absolutely. Yes, she still thought of him every day.

  Now that his father was doing better and the business was under control, he’d arrange to visit her. Maybe he’d meet her parents. Paul smirked, mentally laughing at himself. The man who never committed, suddenly wanted to date. He wanted to see the same woman, and find out where their relationship went.

  Relationship? Man, did I just think that word?

  For years Paul had been a confident Dom, certain of his authority and his appeal. Candy made him doubt himself. She’d become too important to him. Anticipation had his nerves strung tight, imagining the next time they’d meet.

  Seeing Candy again will be like dominating a woman, for the first time, he realized, as his gut clenched with tension. He hadn’t wanted to screw that up either. The first time with anything could be nerve-racking.

  This thing with Candy? It must be love. The irony of it amused him.

  The biggest surprise when coming home was Emily. Christ on a crutch, the little rabbit had really filled out. She also excelled at her job. Efficient, intelligent, and extremely competent, the place could hardly run without her. Paul owed her a lot.

  Emily spent a great deal of time visiting Tom. She seemed to be a little ‘fish out of waterish.’ Paul figured it must be difficult for her not to have his dad to turn to. Maybe she missed Tom, but she certainly worried about him. She genuinely cared about the cold bastard.