“You used Yusef’s house to train your pigeon?”
“It has the highest roof in Zalandan. Alexander’s not at all clever, and I thought he’d have a better chance of finding the palace if he could see it.” She scowled down at the warbling bird, “Listen to him coo at me. He probably doesn’t even realize he did anything wrong.” She took three grains from the leather pouch beside the cage and slipped them through the wicker bars and told the bird sternly, “This isn’t a reward, you understand. I just don’t want you to starve to death.”
“Why didn’t you tell Kalim?”
She didn’t look at him. “He wouldn’t have believed it. He has no liking for me.” She turned and lifted her chin defiantly. “Besides, why should I explain myself to him? Why should I let him tell me what I must do or what I must not do?”
“Because in this instance it might have saved you a modicum of unpleasantness.”
“I experienced no unpleasantness.” Her brow wrinkled. “But for a moment or two you made me uneasy when I first woke up. You behaved most peculiarly.”
He turned to look down at the fire. “As I said, I was not myself. I do not like this place.”
“Why not?”
“It reminds me of what I was.” His lips twisted. “I think for a while tonight I became what I was then.”
“And you believe that is wicked?”
“Don’t you?”
For a moment she could sense an uncertainty and loneliness beneath the guard he usually kept around himself. She wanted to help him, comfort him in some way, but she knew he wouldn’t let her. Yet she had discovered one comfort they both enjoyed he would accept from her. “No.” She met his gaze fearlessly as she moved across the room to stand before him. “Not wicked. Different and … interesting.”
He shook his head. “But then you find the entire world interesting.”
She nodded. “But I know the difference between wicked-interesting and intriguing-interesting.”
“And what is that?”
“Tamar is wicked-interesting. I would not like him to touch me.” She reached out and put her hand on the triangle of dark hair thatching his chest. “But I like you to touch me.”
He went still. “How fortunate for me.”
“I would like to do it again, please.”
“Now?”
“If it’s not too much trouble.” She found it difficult to meet his eyes, so she flowed into his arms and laid her cheek on his chest. “I find looking at you is causing me to feel … I would like to do it again.”
“You’re not too sore?”
“No.” She lifted her head and whispered, “And I would like you to kiss me. You haven’t done that yet.”
“Oh yes.” His lips brushed hers as he gently pushed her back on the carpet. “There are many kinds of kisses, and we enjoyed one of the most pleasant ones. But I shall be delighted to show you many more.” He parted her thighs and moved between them. “By all means, we must keep life interesting for you.”
Tess cradled her head on her arm and gazed contentedly across the chamber at Alexander in his cage. His beady eyes stared back at her as he gave a soft warble. She felt an odd kinship for Alexander at the moment. She had soared herself this night. She had never dreamed when she had come to the tower this afternoon that she would be lying here replete and wondering at the pleasure touch could bring. She had only wished to know more about the puzzle that Galen posed. For that matter she still wished to know, and this might be a very good moment to broach the subject.
“What happened in this place?” Tess turned over on her other side to look at Galen. “Why didn’t you want me to come to the tower?”
Galen was silent for a long time, and she wasn’t sure he was going to answer. “My mother died here.”
“Here in the tower? You said she died in a fall from her horse.”
“She died running away from the tower.” He looked at the leaping flames curling around the wood in the fireplace. “My father killed her lover in the guardroom downstairs. She ran out the door, jumped on her horse, and tried to get away from him.” He paused. “Fifteen minutes later we found her crushed beneath her horse on the road to Said Ababa.”
“We?” She stiffened with shock. Galen had told her he was only a boy of twelve when his mother died. “You were there?”
He nodded jerkily. “When my father learned that she was meeting her lover in this tower, he sent for me. He told me my mother was a whore who had betrayed us both and must be punished. He said she had never had any affection for either of us and was planning to flee with her lover to Said Ababa.”
“Harsh words.”
“True words. I knew she had never loved me.” He paused. “But I didn’t want her to die. I thought if I went with my father to the tower, I might find a way to save her.”
“Perhaps you were mistaken. Most mothers have some affection for their children.”
“Not mine. When I was old enough to leave the nursery, she immediately abandoned me to my father.”
“That could have been by his will.”
He shook his head. “She hated me. She told me so.” He shrugged. “Perhaps she had reason. My father saw her for thirty minutes on the streets of Diran and kidnapped her and brought her to Zalandan to be his concubine.”
“That was your father’s sin, not yours.”
“She saw only my father in me. She once told me that I would grow up to be a barbarian like him, and she wished I had died in her womb.”
Tess shivered with distaste. “She sounds a very unpleasant woman. You were probably better off with your father.”
“Better a barbarian than a whore?”
“Was he a barbarian?”
“Yes, he was far worse than Tamar. And he taught me well. By the time I passed my thirteenth year, I was the savage my mother had called me.” His glance shifted from the fire to her face. “I remember on my sixteenth natal day I got drunk and brought several whores and a few friends here for a feast to celebrate.” He saw her eyes widen. “Ugly? Oh yes, but that was what I was. Tamar and I drank and feasted and orgied for three days. Something about the place drove me into a frenzy.”
Despair. Desperation. Tess didn’t voice the words, but she moved closer to him.
“Tamar killed one of the whores in a drunken rage.” Galen looked back at the fire. “He strangled her.”
“You couldn’t stop him?”
“I was drunk too. I woke the next morning and found her lying dead on the bed between us. For a moment I thought I had done it myself. I was sick and cold with disgust. Then I looked at Tamar and realized what I was becoming, what I already was.” His voice turned fierce. “What we all were. There had to be another path, the blood lust and lawlessness couldn’t go on.” He got to his knees and stoked the fire. “That was the last time I came to the tower.”
She shivered as she looked around the chamber. Now that she realized the debauchery and violence that had taken place here, the very walls seemed to exude a sinister air. In this tower Galen had known enough pain and disillusionment to have destroyed a weaker man. Instead, he had been hammered, honed to greater strength. Yet this place must abrade his spirit.
She sat up and threw off the cloak covering her. “I’ve had enough of this place.” She stood up and grabbed her gown from the floor and stepped into the divided skirt. “It no longer interests me. I wish to go back to the palace.”
“Now?” Galen turned to look at her. “I thought we’d wait until first light.”
She shook her head. “I wouldn’t sleep.” She dropped down on the huge chair and pulled on her boots. “This is not a good place.”
He sat back on his haunches and smiled faintly. “I believe I could pique your interest, if you cared to stay until dawn.”
She smiled cheerfully. “I’m sure you could. I find I like bed play very much, and you are most skillful at it, aren’t you?”
“I endeavor to please.” His voice lowered as his gaze fastened on her bre
asts. “While pleasing myself.”
“Well, we can do that back at the palace.” She stood up, located his clothes, and tossed them to him. “I’m sure well be more comfortable, and Alexander will be happier home in his aviary.
“Ah, yes, the well-traveled Alexander.” He smiled, “We mustn’t forget him.”
“Not well-traveled.” Tess grimaced. “He does everything badly.” She shrugged. “But hell learn in time. I have three years before he has to be proficient.”
He stopped in midmotion of pulling on his boot. “You’ve set yourself a time limit?”
“Of course. I’ve grown very fond of Viane, and if I can train Alexander, I see no reason why we can’t exchange messages after I leave Sedikhan.”
“Indeed?” He jerked on his boot with sudden force and stood up. “You’re already planning your departure? I might remind you that there are certain goals to be reached before you’ll be permitted to leave Zalandan.”
“The babe?” She crossed to the window and stooped down to pick up the wicker cage. “That shouldn’t take long now that we’ve made such a good start. I’m young and healthy, and if God wills, I should be heavy with child by autumn.” She looked at him. “If I cannot use the tower, we must find another place to free Alexander. Do you know of such a place?”
“Possibly,” he muttered as he stood up and moved toward the door. “I’ll think on it.”
He was angry, she realized with surprise. She could feel the tension and displeasure emanating from him even at the distance separating them. “You need not trouble yourself to accompany me. Just tell me where—”
He turned to her. “Listen well,” he said deliberately. “From this moment on I will be behind you, beside you, or within you. When you return to the palace, it will be to my chamber and my bed. You will not travel over the countryside alone or under the protection of any other man. I may have only three years, but they are going to be my years.”
Before she could answer, he had flung open the door, and the next moment she heard the sound of his boots on the stone steps.
Tess hesitated, gazing after him in confusion. Alexander gave a low call, and she glanced down at him absently. “Be quiet. We’re going.”
She shrugged as she began to negotiate the spiral stone staircase. Galen’s attitude might be bewildering, but many good things had come out of this night in addition to the pleasure he had taught her. She had begun to understand the experiences that had created him and the battles he constantly fought.
No, she was not at all sorry she had come to the tower.
Chapter 8
A murmur of voices, the sudden absence of warmth.
Tess murmured protestingly as she felt Galen sit up on the divan. “It’s all right. Go back to sleep.”
Tess opened one eye to see Said standing by the divan, striving valiantly not to look at her. “What is it?”
“Said says Kalim wishes to see me.” Galen swung his feet to the floor.
Tess glanced at the lattice window. Only the first pink streaks of dawn showed through. They had not arrived back at the palace from the tower until after midnight, and could not have been asleep for more than a few hours. “Now?”
“Kalim says it’s important.”
She raised herself on one elbow. “Where is he?”
“In the anteroom.” He paused. “Don’t worry, I won’t permit him to be brought into your presence. I’ll go to him.”
She gazed at him in surprise. “Why? I may not like the man, but I’m not so missish that I must hide my face when he appears before me.”
His gaze shifted to the outline of her naked breasts beneath the silk sheet. “It wasn’t your face I was trying to hide. I thought you might be feeling … vulnerable.”
“You mean defeated.” She shook her head. “You’re not being sensible. No one has defeated me. Not you, and certainly not Kalim. I’ve only kept my bargain, and there’s no dishonor in that.” She airily waved her hand. “Tell him to come in, Said.”
“I’m glad you’ve shown me the error of my thinking,” Galen said gravely. He nodded to Said as he lay back down and draped the sheet over himself. He tucked her bare arm beneath the sheet and drew the silken coverlet up to her chin. “I hope you won’t mind if I object to your appearing in déshabille in front of another man. I find I’m experiencing a certain primitive possessiveness.”
Her brow wrinkled in puzzlement. “I don’t mind, but I don’t understand. It doesn’t seem reasonable for you to feel—”
“I’m sorry to disturb you, Majiron.” Kalim strode across the chamber toward them. “There’s been a raid in the hills. A messenger arrived from the encampment of El Sabir.”
“El Sabir!” Galen sat straight up in bed. “What raider?”
“They’re not sure.” Kalim hesitated. “It could have been Tamar.”
“This far south?” Galen shook his head. “He’s never raided the El Zalan before.”
Kalim shrugged. “The leader matched his description, and he took women and horses as well as gold and seemed very selective about choosing the horses. You know what a passion Tamar has for fine horses.”
“Who brought the message?”
“Yusef.” Kalim carefully avoided looking at Tess. “He wasn’t at the encampment at the time of the raid, but rode in directly afterward. It was he who said descriptions of the leader pointed to Tamar.”
Galen smiled crookedly. “You needn’t be so discreet, Kalim. I assure you that Yusef wasn’t with the majira yesterday.”
Kalim nodded without expression. “I didn’t think he would have remained in such splendid health if that had been the case.”
“Quite right.” Galen stood up and reached for the robe Said hastily held out to him. “And it appears my wife was not enamored of Yusef, but of his house. She needed a high roof from which to launch her pigeon.”
Kalim blinked. “Pigeon?”
“It’s actually Viane’s pigeon. We’re teaching him to—” Tess broke off. Why was she making explanations to Kalim? She turned to Galen. “Where is this El Sabir?”
“It’s one of the encampments that guards the gold mines in the hills. The El Sabir is one of the vassal tribes of the El Zalan.” Galen took the goblet of wine Said held out to him. “It’s about a four-hour ride from here.” He took a sip of wine and turned back to Kalim. “What damage?”
“Not good. He set the encampment to the torch, and there were six deaths.” Kalim paused. “One child. The young son of Hanal.”
Galen swore. “Mother of God, when will it end?” He thrust the goblet at Said, turned, and strode toward the dressing room. “We’ll leave within a half hour. Rouse the men.” He disappeared into the dressing room, followed closely by Said.
Kalim started for the door, then stopped and slowly turned to face Tess again. “I was mistaken?” he asked haltingly.
Tess gazed at him without answering.
“You should have defended yourself. You should have told me—”
“That I’m not a strumpet? Why should I defend myself to you? Why should I care what you thought?” She raised her chin. “I knew you were not my friend.”
He flushed. “Perhaps not your friend, but I would not wish harm to an innocent woman.” He inclined his head in a formal bow. “You have my regrets if my action caused you undue pain. I owe you reparation.”
Tess stared at him in surprise. He was a proud man, and she had not expected an apology. He was undoubtedly more complex and perhaps less arrogant than she had thought. She tilted her head to gaze at him curiously. “It isn’t only that I’m a woman of the West, is it? You dislike me.”
“I have no right to dislike you. You are the majira. I should—”
“Sweet Mary, cease.” She scowled at him. “Tell me the truth.”
He opened and closed his mouth without speaking. Finally, he said jerkily, “I do not dislike you. I fear you.”
Before she could recover from the shock of his words, he turned on his heel and str
ode from the chamber.
Tess gazed blankly at the door. His words had astonished her not only because of their content, but because of the admission itself. Kalim represented all that was alien and forbidding in Zalandan for her, and yet, for an instant, she had detected something vulnerable and sensitive beyond his proud, cold facade.
Perhaps she had also been arrogant in expecting these people to welcome her warmly when she had done nothing to earn such a welcome. Since she had come to Zalandan, she had not really tried to get to know the El Zalan. Like a child, she had played with the pigeons, ridden Pavda, and sought only to amuse herself.
“I’ll be back tomorrow evening, if all goes well. Lord knows, I can’t be certain.” Galen, fully dressed, strode out of the dressing room. “I’ll probably have to spend hours in the council tent trying to talk them out of starting a tribal war. Stay inside the city gates. Though I doubt if Tamar will be anywhere nearby. He usually strikes and then carries his booty back to his own encampment, but there’s no sense taking risks.” He started toward the door.
“Wait.” She blurted out, “I want to go with you.”
Galen shook his head. “This won’t be a pleasant journey. No tents or satin cushions. We’ll travel fast and sleep on the ground.”
“I know that. I still want to go.”
His gaze narrowed on her face. “Why?”
“I’m not sure.” She moistened her lips with her tongue. “I think perhaps I might learn …” She shook her head and repeated helplessly, “I don’t know.”
“You’ll see things you won’t like.”
She nodded. Her hand clutched the sheet covering her body; the texture was soft and silky, as her entire life had been since she arrived in Sedikhan. But there were other, rougher textures and patterns to this country, and people she had not experienced yet. “May I go with you?”
He nodded curtly. “You have a right to see why I brought you to Sedikhan. Dress. I’ll meet you in the courtyard within the half hour.”