Husband In A Lottery

  By

  Mario V. Farina

  Copyright 2017 Mario V. Farina

  All Rights Reserved

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  Mario V. Farina

  Email: [email protected]

  'I won you in the lottery to be my husband," I blurted angrily. "I wish to marry you. Whether you love me or not, you can't refuse!" Oh, how could I have been so gullible?

  My name is Lois Auburn. All right, you can say it, I'm a country bumpkin. In spades! The picture on the cover of this story was taken while I was sitting under a tree doing some daydreaming. You can see I ain't no beauty. I was dreaming someone would come to the farm, see me as I did the chores, milking the cows, planting the seeds, washing the dishes, and all that stuff, and be smitten by me. Despite my plainness, he would ask me for a date. He would fall in love with me, and we would be married when I turned 21. Ah, what a dreamer I was. And so naive!

  When I heard about the lottery that was awarding Robert Miller as first prize, him willing to be the winner's husband, I fell for it like nobody else. They were going to sell only fifty tickets, I was told. The price for a ticket was $2000. From part-time work at Wal-Mart's, I had been able to save a little more than that. I felt that, with only fifty tickets being sold, I had the chance of a lifetime to be married to the most handsome man I had ever seen. He was tall and slim with jet black hair. He wore glasses that made him look like a mayor or even a senator. Somehow, he would fall in love with me, and we'd be happily united in marriage, have kids, and live in the most snooty part of town in a huge white colonial with columns at the front.

  I knew Robert by sight. I had never been properly introduced to him, but knew he had a good job at Ajax Products. He lived in a cute Cape Cod on Congress Street. I lived on a farm with my parents several miles into the country. At times, when I went to town to do some shopping, I'd walk by his house hoping he would be on the porch and we would meet. That never happened.

  The lottery was not publicized to any great extent because there was some question about whether it was legal. I didn't care whether it was legal or not, so long as I won Robert. I had big plans! I'd nickname him Rob, and he would be my lover, Rob. Oh, those dreams! No one had ever dreamed like me!

  I found out that my friend, Jeffrey Langford, was the originator of the lottery. His plan was to take half the money from the ticket sales and give the other half to Robert. What a start this would be for our marriage. Rob would get $50,000, and that would be far more than enough for us to make a deposit on a beautiful home. I met with Jeffrey and handed him $2000 in cash. In return, he gave me half a ticket and kept the other half. The other half, he said, would be thrown into a hat. The tickets would be thoroughly mixed with a paddle, and a drawing would be made by Mr. Langford's ten-year-old son, Jimmy. The date of the drawing was to be July 1 at Mr. Langford's home. Jeffrey said the drawing would be made at five o'clock sharp. All ticket holders were welcome to attend.

  July 1 was slow in coming. On that date, I drove the old family Chevy to Jeffrey's home on Wendell Avenue. I was ushered into the living room by Mr. Langford's beautiful wife, Belle. She said there would probably be many others attending, but nobody else showed up. I was the only one in the house to witness the drawing. At five o'clock, Mr. Langford, his wife, Jimmy, and myself gathered in the dining room where I saw a large fedora on a table. I could see there were many torn tickets in it. I shivered when I realized that one of them was mine. Jeffrey said he had already stirred up the tickets, and was ready for the drawing. Jimmy held his left hand over both his eyes while he drew a ticket from the hat and handed it to his father. Jeffrey stared at it, and was obviously astonished at what he saw. "Lois," he said, "you are the winner!" I nearly fainted. My dream had come true!

  Jeffrey drew a phone from the breast pocket of his jacket, and punched out a number. "Robert," he exclaimed excitedly. "We had the drawing! We have a winner! It's Lois Auburn. She's right here with us! Can you come over now?" He listened for a while then said, "goodbye." and hung up.

  Smiling broadly, he declared, "Lois, Robert Miller will be here soon. You're going to meet your future husband!" My world began to whirl. I felt as if I was on a merry-go-round and the music was playing the Wedding March. It was no more than ten minutes before the front door opened, and Lover Bob walked in. Jeffrey introduced me to him formally. I was in a daze as we all sat at the dining room table to enjoy coffee and cookies.

  "I'm sure you two love birds want to discuss your wedding plans," Jeffrey said. I eagerly nodded yes. Jeffrey and his family left the room. Lover Bob and I were alone together! I believed we would begin chatting, holding hands, looking deep into each other's eyes, then, finally, kissing passionately. It didn't happen that way.

  After a few awkward minutes, Robert said, "Lois, you were the only person who bought a ticket. The proceeds from the lottery amounted to $2000. Jeffrey took $1000 and I got $1000. The lottery had been a big failure. I'd like to share my earnings with you 50-50, and not go through with the marriage."

  Stunned, by what he had just said, I couldn't find the words to express my disappointment, anger, heartache, and feelings of having been betrayed. "Robert, how could you and Jeffrey have deceived me that way?" I managed to stammer.

  "Jeffrey don't know nothing about this," Robert said. "Don't blame him. Actually, we didn't deceive you. Our intentions were honest. Everything we said we would do, we did. We had a lottery, you bought a ticket, and you won. But now, I don't want to marry you because I don't love you. I'm offering you half from my share of the money I got from the lottery. How could anything be more fair? You will now have $500 more than when you walked into the house!"

  "You said you don't love me," I exclaimed bitterly. "How could you have known you would love any other winner?"

  "I'm ashamed about that," he said. "Before the drawing, I was to tell Jeffry who I hoped would win and he was going to make sure it happened."

  "You were going to cheat on even drawing the winner?" I asked incredulously.

  "I needed to have feelings for the winner," he muttered guiltily. "She was going to be my wife!"

  "Jimmy closed his eyes when he drew my ticket," I objected.

  "All the tickets were fake, Lois. You won because you were the only one who bought a ticket! Jeffrey pretended your name was on the ticket Jimmy handed him."

  "Well, I won you in the lottery to be my husband," I blurted angrily. "I wish to marry you. Whether you love me or not, you can't refuse. Maybe, with time, you'll learn to love me!"

  The look on his face was one to be remembered. "After what I've just told you, you still want to marry me?" he gasped. "I had expected you to hate me!"

  "I do hate you," I said. "But, I need to be punished for my utter stupidity!"

  "That don't make no sense!" he declared desperately. "No, I won't do it. I won't marry you!"

  "You must," I said. "I won you! We need to set the date for our wedding right now! I want a big church wedding with a stretch limousine and lots of bridesmaids!"

  "No! No! I'll give you more than $500. I'll give you all the money I got. Take it or leave it. I'm going to walk out of here. Right now."

  "I won you!" I repeated. "You're mine. You have no choice. If I have to, I'll take you to Small Claims Court. No, to Big Claims Court! Think how you will look when the news comes out that you made me victim to a fraudu
lent lottery. You'll be lucky if you don't go to jail."

  "You won't fare so good neither," he challenged. "How will you look, having been taken in with something so obvious?"

  "Well, after all, I'm only a country bumpkin. Maybe, it was to be expected that I would be easily fooled. But, you'll have to admit, I have suddenly become a lot wiser!"

  "All right," he said "I'll marry you! But, see if I do anything afterwards that makes it look like I'm being a loving husband."

  "No problem," I said. "and I may not feel like playing the part of a loving wife!"

  "I will not live with you!" he said. "I'll philander. I'll abandon you. I'll date other women!"

  "I'll divorce, you!" I retorted. "I'll demand alimony. I'll take everything you have!"

  He was silent for several minutes. I had begun feeling sorry for him. "How much do you want to forget the whole thing," he muttered.

  "Everything you own!" I realized how completely he had surrendered. I was going to enjoy the next part!

  "You can't mean that!"

  "I do mean it," I insisted. "You live on Congress Street, don't you?"

  "Yes."

  "What kind of furniture do you have?"

  "The usual. TV, refrigerator, sofas, those kinds of things."

  "They're mine now," I said.

  He was visibly shaken. I was enjoying this immensely. "You live in a nice house. Do you own it?"

  "Yes, my parents deeded it to me when they moved to their new house. You don't intend to claim that do you?"

  "No," I replied. "That would be greedy of me." I thought that was a nice touch. I was showing fairness when all he had displayed was dishonesty. His face displayed a shade of relief.

  "How do you expect me to live without furniture and other things?" he asked.

  "We don't have room for them things at the farm," I responded. "We have a barn with two cows in it. I don't think they would like your junk in there with them. You can keep all this at your home, but I will own it! How much money do you have, total?"

  "A few dollars."

  "What about the money you got from the lottery?"

  "I have only a little left."

  "That's mine!" I knew he probably had more, but wasn't going to argue about it.

  "How am I going to live without money?" he demanded. "I eat all my meals out. I don't cook nothing."

  "I'll fix the meals for you myself," I said. I don't know why I made that statement. It came out of my mouth before I had had a chance to think. As I look back on it now, I understand I cared more about him than I even knew.

  Robert displayed much surprised at what I had said. I was surprised too, but tried not to show it. "OK," he said, "but only for a short time."

  "You've got a good job," I said. "I know you work at Ajax. You probably make good money and should be able to get ahead. What do you do there?"

  "I'm a bean counter. My salary is pretty good, but I have lots of expenses."

  "What's a bean counter?"

  "An accountant! You really are a country bumpkin aren't you?"

  "Yes," I said. "But, I don't think you're very smart either. You're probably a city bumpkin!"

  "Well, I'm smart enough to know that I wouldn't be getting much of a bride if there was only you to choose from!"

  "And I'm smart enough to know," I retorted, "you don't get no bargain when the prize in a lottery is a husband like you!"

  "Touché!" He commented with a smile.

  I smiled too. Than, a thought occurred to me. "Somehow, I get the feeling that all of this was fated from a long-ago beginning," I remarked.

  "Maybe so," he said. "But that don't mean everything fated is good fate. Maybe we should check out this fate idea of years."

  "How? " I asked.

  "Are you hungry?" he asked in return. "Ellen's diner is next door. Shall we go there and began checking out your fate idea?"

  "Sure," I said. "Let's!"

  We didn't get married right away. We needed to spend several months checking out what fate had in store for us. We've been together now for several years and are very happy, two unlikely bumpkins that had a bumpy start, but were meant for each other from the beginning of time.