CHAPTER XIV--A DREAM REALISED
Having now brought all my things on shore and secured them, I went backto my boat, and rowed or paddled her along the shore to her old harbour,where I laid her up, and made the best of my way to my old habitation,where I found everything safe and quiet. I began now to repose myself,live after my old fashion, and take care of my family affairs; and for awhile I lived easy enough, only that I was more vigilant than I used tobe, looked out oftener, and did not go abroad so much; and if at any timeI did stir with any freedom, it was always to the east part of theisland, where I was pretty well satisfied the savages never came, andwhere I could go without so many precautions, and such a load of arms andammunition as I always carried with me if I went the other way.
I lived in this condition near two years more; but my unlucky head, thatwas always to let me know it was born to make my body miserable, was allthese two years filled with projects and designs how, if it werepossible, I might get away from this island: for sometimes I was formaking another voyage to the wreck, though my reason told me that therewas nothing left there worth the hazard of my voyage; sometimes for aramble one way, sometimes another--and I believe verily, if I had hadthe boat that I went from Sallee in, I should have ventured to sea,bound anywhere, I knew not whither.
I have been, in all my circumstances, a memento to those who are touchedwith the general plague of mankind, whence, for aught I know, one halfof their miseries flow: I mean that of not being satisfied with thestation wherein God and Nature hath placed them--for, not to look backupon my primitive condition, and the excellent advice of my father, theopposition to which was, as I may call it, my _original sin_, mysubsequent mistakes of the same kind had been the means of my cominginto this miserable condition; for had that Providence which so happilyseated me at the Brazils as a planter blessed me with confined desires,and I could have been contented to have gone on gradually, I might havebeen by this time--I mean in the time of my being in this island--one ofthe most considerable planters in the Brazils--nay, I am persuaded, thatby the improvements I had made in that little time I lived there, andthe increase I should probably have made if I had remained, I might havebeen worth a hundred thousand moidores--and what business had I to leavea settled fortune, a well-stocked plantation, improving and increasing,to turn supercargo to Guinea to fetch negroes, when patience and timewould have so increased our stock at home, that we could have boughtthem at our own door from those whose business it was to fetch them? andthough it had cost us something more, yet the difference of that pricewas by no means worth saving at so great a hazard.
But as this is usually the fate of young heads, so reflection upon thefolly of it is as commonly the exercise of more years, or of the dear-bought experience of time--so it was with me now; and yet so deep hadthe mistake taken root in my temper, that I could not satisfy myself inmy station, but was continually poring upon the means and possibility ofmy escape from this place; and that I may, with greater pleasure to thereader, bring on the remaining part of my story, it may not be improperto give some account of my first conceptions on the subject of thisfoolish scheme for my escape, and how, and upon what foundation, Iacted.
I am now to be supposed retired into my castle, after my late voyage tothe wreck, my frigate laid up and secured under water, as usual, and mycondition restored to what it was before: I had more wealth, indeed, thanI had before, but was not at all the richer; for I had no more use for itthan the Indians of Peru had before the Spaniards came there.
It was one of the nights in the rainy season in March, thefour-and-twentieth year of my first setting foot in this island ofsolitude, I was lying in my bed or hammock, awake, very well in health,had no pain, no distemper, no uneasiness of body, nor any uneasiness ofmind more than ordinary, but could by no means close my eyes, that is, soas to sleep; no, not a wink all night long, otherwise than as follows:
It is impossible to set down the innumerable crowd of thoughts that whirledthrough that great thoroughfare of the brain, the memory, in this night'stime. I ran over the whole history of my life in miniature, or byabridgment, as I may call it, to my coming to this island, and also ofthat part of my life since I came to this island. In my reflections uponthe state of my case since I came on shore on this island, I wascomparing the happy posture of my affairs in the first years of myhabitation here, with the life of anxiety, fear, and care which I hadlived in ever since I had seen the print of a foot in the sand. Not thatI did not believe the savages had frequented the island even all thewhile, and might have been several hundreds of them at times on shorethere; but I had never known it, and was incapable of any apprehensionsabout it; my satisfaction was perfect, though my danger was the same, andI was as happy in not knowing my danger as if I had never really beenexposed to it. This furnished my thoughts with many very profitablereflections, and particularly this one: How infinitely good thatProvidence is, which has provided, in its government of mankind, suchnarrow bounds to his sight and knowledge of things; and though he walksin the midst of so many thousand dangers, the sight of which, ifdiscovered to him, would distract his mind and sink his spirits, he iskept serene and calm, by having the events of things hid from his eyes,and knowing nothing of the dangers which surround him.
After these thoughts had for some time entertained me, I came to reflectseriously upon the real danger I had been in for so many years in thisvery island, and how I had walked about in the greatest security, andwith all possible tranquillity, even when perhaps nothing but the brow ofa hill, a great tree, or the casual approach of night, had been betweenme and the worst kind of destruction--viz. that of falling into the handsof cannibals and savages, who would have seized on me with the same viewas I would on a goat or turtle; and have thought it no more crime to killand devour me than I did of a pigeon or a curlew. I would unjustlyslander myself if I should say I was not sincerely thankful to my greatPreserver, to whose singular protection I acknowledged, with greathumanity, all these unknown deliverances were due, and without which Imust inevitably have fallen into their merciless hands.
When these thoughts were over, my head was for some time taken up inconsidering the nature of these wretched creatures, I mean the savages,and how it came to pass in the world that the wise Governor of all thingsshould give up any of His creatures to such inhumanity--nay, to somethingso much below even brutality itself--as to devour its own kind: but asthis ended in some (at that time) fruitless speculations, it occurred tome to inquire what part of the world these wretches lived in? how far offthe coast was from whence they came? what they ventured over so far fromhome for? what kind of boats they had? and why I might not order myselfand my business so that I might be able to go over thither, as they wereto come to me?
I never so much as troubled myself to consider what I should do withmyself when I went thither; what would become of me if I fell into thehands of these savages; or how I should escape them if they attacked me;no, nor so much as how it was possible for me to reach the coast, and notto be attacked by some or other of them, without any possibility ofdelivering myself; and if I should not fall into their hands, what Ishould do for provision, or whither I should bend my course; none ofthese thoughts, I say, so much as came in my way; but my mind was whollybent upon the notion of my passing over in my boat to the mainland. Ilooked upon my present condition as the most miserable that couldpossibly be; that I was not able to throw myself into anything but death,that could be called worse; and if I reached the shore of the main Imight perhaps meet with relief, or I might coast along, as I did on theAfrican shore, till I came to some inhabited country, and where I mightfind some relief; and after all, perhaps I might fall in with someChristian ship that might take me in: and if the worst came to the worst,I could but die, which would put an end to all these miseries at once.Pray note, all this was the fruit of a disturbed mind, an impatienttemper, made desperate, as it were, by the long continuance of mytroubles, and the disappointments I had met in the wreck I had been onboard of, and where I
had been so near obtaining what I so earnestlylonged for--somebody to speak to, and to learn some knowledge from themof the place where I was, and of the probable means of my deliverance. Iwas agitated wholly by these thoughts; all my calm of mind, in myresignation to Providence, and waiting the issue of the dispositions ofHeaven, seemed to be suspended; and I had as it were no power to turn mythoughts to anything but to the project of a voyage to the main, whichcame upon me with such force, and such an impetuosity of desire, that itwas not to be resisted.
When this had agitated my thoughts for two hours or more, with suchviolence that it set my very blood into a ferment, and my pulse beat asif I had been in a fever, merely with the extraordinary fervour of mymind about it, Nature--as if I had been fatigued and exhausted with thevery thoughts of it--threw me into a sound sleep. One would have thoughtI should have dreamed of it, but I did not, nor of anything relating toit, but I dreamed that as I was going out in the morning as usual from mycastle, I saw upon the shore two canoes and eleven savages coming toland, and that they brought with them another savage whom they were goingto kill in order to eat him; when, on a sudden, the savage that they weregoing to kill jumped away, and ran for his life; and I thought in mysleep that he came running into my little thick grove before myfortification, to hide himself; and that I seeing him alone, and notperceiving that the others sought him that way, showed myself to him, andsmiling upon him, encouraged him: that he kneeled down to me, seeming topray me to assist him; upon which I showed him my ladder, made him go up,and carried him into my cave, and he became my servant; and that as soonas I had got this man, I said to myself, "Now I may certainly venture tothe mainland, for this fellow will serve me as a pilot, and will tell mewhat to do, and whither to go for provisions, and whither not to go forfear of being devoured; what places to venture into, and what to shun."I waked with this thought; and was under such inexpressible impressionsof joy at the prospect of my escape in my dream, that the disappointmentswhich I felt upon coming to myself, and finding that it was no more thana dream, were equally extravagant the other way, and threw me into a verygreat dejection of spirits.
Upon this, however, I made this conclusion: that my only way to go aboutto attempt an escape was, to endeavour to get a savage into mypossession: and, if possible, it should be one of their prisoners, whomthey had condemned to be eaten, and should bring hither to kill. Butthese thoughts still were attended with this difficulty: that it wasimpossible to effect this without attacking a whole caravan of them, andkilling them all; and this was not only a very desperate attempt, andmight miscarry, but, on the other hand, I had greatly scrupled thelawfulness of it to myself; and my heart trembled at the thoughts ofshedding so much blood, though it was for my deliverance. I need notrepeat the arguments which occurred to me against this, they being thesame mentioned before; but though I had other reasons to offer now--viz.that those men were enemies to my life, and would devour me if theycould; that it was self-preservation, in the highest degree, to delivermyself from this death of a life, and was acting in my own defence asmuch as if they were actually assaulting me, and the like; I say thoughthese things argued for it, yet the thoughts of shedding human blood formy deliverance were very terrible to me, and such as I could by no meansreconcile myself to for a great while. However, at last, after manysecret disputes with myself, and after great perplexities about it (forall these arguments, one way and another, struggled in my head a longtime), the eager prevailing desire of deliverance at length mastered allthe rest; and I resolved, if possible, to get one of these savages intomy hands, cost what it would. My next thing was to contrive how to doit, and this, indeed, was very difficult to resolve on; but as I couldpitch upon no probable means for it, so I resolved to put myself upon thewatch, to see them when they came on shore, and leave the rest to theevent; taking such measures as the opportunity should present, let whatwould be.
With these resolutions in my thoughts, I set myself upon the scout asoften as possible, and indeed so often that I was heartily tired of it;for it was above a year and a half that I waited; and for great part ofthat time went out to the west end, and to the south-west corner of theisland almost every day, to look for canoes, but none appeared. This wasvery discouraging, and began to trouble me much, though I cannot say thatit did in this case (as it had done some time before) wear off the edgeof my desire to the thing; but the longer it seemed to be delayed, themore eager I was for it: in a word, I was not at first so careful to shunthe sight of these savages, and avoid being seen by them, as I was noweager to be upon them. Besides, I fancied myself able to manage one,nay, two or three savages, if I had them, so as to make them entirelyslaves to me, to do whatever I should direct them, and to prevent theirbeing able at any time to do me any hurt. It was a great while that Ipleased myself with this affair; but nothing still presented itself; allmy fancies and schemes came to nothing, for no savages came near me for agreat while.
About a year and a half after I entertained these notions (and by longmusing had, as it were, resolved them all into nothing, for want of anoccasion to put them into execution), I was surprised one morning byseeing no less than five canoes all on shore together on my side theisland, and the people who belonged to them all landed and out of mysight. The number of them broke all my measures; for seeing so many, andknowing that they always came four or six, or sometimes more in a boat, Icould not tell what to think of it, or how to take my measures to attacktwenty or thirty men single-handed; so lay still in my castle, perplexedand discomforted. However, I put myself into the same position for anattack that I had formerly provided, and was just ready for action, ifanything had presented. Having waited a good while, listening to hear ifthey made any noise, at length, being very impatient, I set my guns atthe foot of my ladder, and clambered up to the top of the hill, by my twostages, as usual; standing so, however, that my head did not appear abovethe hill, so that they could not perceive me by any means. Here Iobserved, by the help of my perspective glass, that they were no lessthan thirty in number; that they had a fire kindled, and that they hadmeat dressed. How they had cooked it I knew not, or what it was; butthey were all dancing, in I know not how many barbarous gestures andfigures, their own way, round the fire.
While I was thus looking on them, I perceived, by my perspective, twomiserable wretches dragged from the boats, where, it seems, they werelaid by, and were now brought out for the slaughter. I perceived one ofthem immediately fall; being knocked down, I suppose, with a club orwooden sword, for that was their way; and two or three others were atwork immediately, cutting him open for their cookery, while the othervictim was left standing by himself, till they should be ready for him.In that very moment this poor wretch, seeing himself a little at libertyand unbound, Nature inspired him with hopes of life, and he started awayfrom them, and ran with incredible swiftness along the sands, directlytowards me; I mean towards that part of the coast where my habitationwas. I was dreadfully frightened, I must acknowledge, when I perceivedhim run my way; and especially when, as I thought, I saw him pursued bythe whole body: and now I expected that part of my dream was coming topass, and that he would certainly take shelter in my grove; but I couldnot depend, by any means, upon my dream, that the other savages would notpursue him thither and find him there. However, I kept my station, andmy spirits began to recover when I found that there was not above threemen that followed him; and still more was I encouraged, when I found thathe outstripped them exceedingly in running, and gained ground on them; sothat, if he could but hold out for half-an-hour, I saw easily he wouldfairly get away from them all.
There was between them and my castle the creek, which I mentioned oftenin the first part of my story, where I landed my cargoes out of the ship;and this I saw plainly he must necessarily swim over, or the poor wretchwould be taken there; but when the savage escaping came thither, he madenothing of it, though the tide was then up; but plunging in, swam throughin about thirty strokes, or thereabouts, landed, and ran with exceedingstrength and swi
ftness. When the three persons came to the creek, Ifound that two of them could swim, but the third could not, and that,standing on the other side, he looked at the others, but went no farther,and soon after went softly back again; which, as it happened, was verywell for him in the end. I observed that the two who swam were yet morethan twice as strong swimming over the creek as the fellow was that fledfrom them. It came very warmly upon my thoughts, and indeedirresistibly, that now was the time to get me a servant, and, perhaps, acompanion or assistant; and that I was plainly called by Providence tosave this poor creature's life. I immediately ran down the ladders withall possible expedition, fetched my two guns, for they were both at thefoot of the ladders, as I observed before, and getting up again with thesame haste to the top of the hill, I crossed towards the sea; and havinga very short cut, and all down hill, placed myself in the way between thepursuers and the pursued, hallowing aloud to him that fled, who, lookingback, was at first perhaps as much frightened at me as at them; but Ibeckoned with my hand to him to come back; and, in the meantime, I slowlyadvanced towards the two that followed; then rushing at once upon theforemost, I knocked him down with the stock of my piece. I was loath tofire, because I would not have the rest hear; though, at that distance,it would not have been easily heard, and being out of sight of the smoke,too, they would not have known what to make of it. Having knocked thisfellow down, the other who pursued him stopped, as if he had beenfrightened, and I advanced towards him: but as I came nearer, I perceivedpresently he had a bow and arrow, and was fitting it to shoot at me: so Iwas then obliged to shoot at him first, which I did, and killed him atthe first shot. The poor savage who fled, but had stopped, though he sawboth his enemies fallen and killed, as he thought, yet was so frightenedwith the fire and noise of my piece that he stood stock still, andneither came forward nor went backward, though he seemed rather inclinedstill to fly than to come on. I hallooed again to him, and made signs tocome forward, which he easily understood, and came a little way; thenstopped again, and then a little farther, and stopped again; and I couldthen perceive that he stood trembling, as if he had been taken prisoner,and had just been to be killed, as his two enemies were. I beckoned tohim again to come to me, and gave him all the signs of encouragement thatI could think of; and he came nearer and nearer, kneeling down every tenor twelve steps, in token of acknowledgment for saving his life. Ismiled at him, and looked pleasantly, and beckoned to him to come stillnearer; at length he came close to me; and then he kneeled down again,kissed the ground, and laid his head upon the ground, and taking me bythe foot, set my foot upon his head; this, it seems, was in token ofswearing to be my slave for ever. I took him up and made much of him,and encouraged him all I could. But there was more work to do yet; for Iperceived the savage whom I had knocked down was not killed, but stunnedwith the blow, and began to come to himself: so I pointed to him, andshowed him the savage, that he was not dead; upon this he spoke somewords to me, and though I could not understand them, yet I thought theywere pleasant to hear; for they were the first sound of a man's voicethat I had heard, my own excepted, for above twenty-five years. Butthere was no time for such reflections now; the savage who was knockeddown recovered himself so far as to sit up upon the ground, and Iperceived that my savage began to be afraid; but when I saw that, Ipresented my other piece at the man, as if I would shoot him: upon thismy savage, for so I call him now, made a motion to me to lend him mysword, which hung naked in a belt by my side, which I did. He no soonerhad it, but he runs to his enemy, and at one blow cut off his head socleverly, no executioner in Germany could have done it sooner or better;which I thought very strange for one who, I had reason to believe, neversaw a sword in his life before, except their own wooden swords: however,it seems, as I learned afterwards, they make their wooden swords sosharp, so heavy, and the wood is so hard, that they will even cut offheads with them, ay, and arms, and that at one blow, too. When he haddone this, he comes laughing to me in sign of triumph, and brought me thesword again, and with abundance of gestures which I did not understand,laid it down, with the head of the savage that he had killed, just beforeme. But that which astonished him most was to know how I killed theother Indian so far off; so, pointing to him, he made signs to me to lethim go to him; and I bade him go, as well as I could. When he came tohim, he stood like one amazed, looking at him, turning him first on oneside, then on the other; looked at the wound the bullet had made, whichit seems was just in his breast, where it had made a hole, and no greatquantity of blood had followed; but he had bled inwardly, for he wasquite dead. He took up his bow and arrows, and came back; so I turned togo away, and beckoned him to follow me, making signs to him that moremight come after them. Upon this he made signs to me that he should burythem with sand, that they might not be seen by the rest, if theyfollowed; and so I made signs to him again to do so. He fell to work;and in an instant he had scraped a hole in the sand with his hands bigenough to bury the first in, and then dragged him into it, and coveredhim; and did so by the other also; I believe he had him buried them bothin a quarter of an hour. Then, calling away, I carried him, not to mycastle, but quite away to my cave, on the farther part of the island: soI did not let my dream come to pass in that part, that he came into mygrove for shelter. Here I gave him bread and a bunch of raisins to eat,and a draught of water, which I found he was indeed in great distressfor, from his running: and having refreshed him, I made signs for him togo and lie down to sleep, showing him a place where I had laid somerice-straw, and a blanket upon it, which I used to sleep upon myselfsometimes; so the poor creature lay down, and went to sleep.
He was a comely, handsome fellow, perfectly well made, with straight,strong limbs, not too large; tall, and well-shaped; and, as I reckon,about twenty-six years of age. He had a very good countenance, not afierce and surly aspect, but seemed to have something very manly in hisface; and yet he had all the sweetness and softness of a European in hiscountenance, too, especially when he smiled. His hair was long andblack, not curled like wool; his forehead very high and large; and agreat vivacity and sparkling sharpness in his eyes. The colour of hisskin was not quite black, but very tawny; and yet not an ugly, yellow,nauseous tawny, as the Brazilians and Virginians, and other natives ofAmerica are, but of a bright kind of a dun olive-colour, that had in itsomething very agreeable, though not very easy to describe. His face wasround and plump; his nose small, not flat, like the negroes; a very goodmouth, thin lips, and his fine teeth well set, and as white as ivory.
After he had slumbered, rather than slept, about half-an-hour, he awokeagain, and came out of the cave to me, for I had been milking my goatswhich I had in the enclosure just by: when he espied me he came runningto me, laying himself down again upon the ground, with all the possiblesigns of an humble, thankful disposition, making a great many anticgestures to show it. At last he lays his head flat upon the ground,close to my foot, and sets my other foot upon his head, as he had donebefore; and after this made all the signs to me of subjection, servitude,and submission imaginable, to let me know how he would serve me so longas he lived. I understood him in many things, and let him know I wasvery well pleased with him. In a little time I began to speak to him;and teach him to speak to me; and first, I let him know his name shouldbe Friday, which was the day I saved his life; I called him so for thememory of the time. I likewise taught him to say Master; and then lethim know that was to be my name; I likewise taught him to say Yes and Noand to know the meaning of them. I gave him some milk in an earthen pot,and let him see me drink it before him, and sop my bread in it; and gavehim a cake of bread to do the like, which he quickly complied with, andmade signs that it was very good for him. I kept there with him all thatnight; but as soon as it was day I beckoned to him to come with me, andlet him know I would give him some clothes; at which he seemed very glad,for he was stark naked. As we went by the place where he had buried thetwo men, he pointed exactly to the place, and showed me the marks that hehad made to find them again, making signs t
o me that we should dig themup again and eat them. At this I appeared very angry, expressed myabhorrence of it, made as if I would vomit at the thoughts of it, andbeckoned with my hand to him to come away, which he did immediately, withgreat submission. I then led him up to the top of the hill, to see ifhis enemies were gone; and pulling out my glass I looked, and saw plainlythe place where they had been, but no appearance of them or their canoes;so that it was plain they were gone, and had left their two comradesbehind them, without any search after them.
But I was not content with this discovery; but having now more courage,and consequently more curiosity, I took my man Friday with me, giving himthe sword in his hand, with the bow and arrows at his back, which I foundhe could use very dexterously, making him carry one gun for me, and I twofor myself; and away we marched to the place where these creatures hadbeen; for I had a mind now to get some further intelligence of them.When I came to the place my very blood ran chill in my veins, and myheart sunk within me, at the horror of the spectacle; indeed, it was adreadful sight, at least it was so to me, though Friday made nothing ofit. The place was covered with human bones, the ground dyed with theirblood, and great pieces of flesh left here and there, half-eaten,mangled, and scorched; and, in short, all the tokens of the triumphantfeast they had been making there, after a victory over their enemies. Isaw three skulls, five hands, and the bones of three or four legs andfeet, and abundance of other parts of the bodies; and Friday, by hissigns, made me understand that they brought over four prisoners to feastupon; that three of them were eaten up, and that he, pointing to himself,was the fourth; that there had been a great battle between them and theirnext king, of whose subjects, it seems, he had been one, and that theyhad taken a great number of prisoners; all which were carried to severalplaces by those who had taken them in the fight, in order to feast uponthem, as was done here by these wretches upon those they brought hither.
I caused Friday to gather all the skulls, bones, flesh, and whateverremained, and lay them together in a heap, and make a great fire upon it,and burn them all to ashes. I found Friday had still a hankering stomachafter some of the flesh, and was still a cannibal in his nature; but Ishowed so much abhorrence at the very thoughts of it, and at the leastappearance of it, that he durst not discover it: for I had, by somemeans, let him know that I would kill him if he offered it.
When he had done this, we came back to our castle; and there I fell towork for my man Friday; and first of all, I gave him a pair of linendrawers, which I had out of the poor gunner's chest I mentioned, which Ifound in the wreck, and which, with a little alteration, fitted him verywell; and then I made him a jerkin of goat's skin, as well as my skillwould allow (for I was now grown a tolerably good tailor); and I gave hima cap which I made of hare's skin, very convenient, and fashionableenough; and thus he was clothed, for the present, tolerably well, and wasmighty well pleased to see himself almost as well clothed as his master.It is true he went awkwardly in these clothes at first: wearing thedrawers was very awkward to him, and the sleeves of the waistcoat galledhis shoulders and the inside of his arms; but a little easing them wherehe complained they hurt him, and using himself to them, he took to themat length very well.
The next day, after I came home to my hutch with him, I began to considerwhere I should lodge him: and that I might do well for him and yet beperfectly easy myself, I made a little tent for him in the vacant placebetween my two fortifications, in the inside of the last, and in theoutside of the first. As there was a door or entrance there into mycave, I made a formal framed door-case, and a door to it, of boards, andset it up in the passage, a little within the entrance; and, causing thedoor to open in the inside, I barred it up in the night, taking in myladders, too; so that Friday could no way come at me in the inside of myinnermost wall, without making so much noise in getting over that it mustneeds awaken me; for my first wall had now a complete roof over it oflong poles, covering all my tent, and leaning up to the side of the hill;which was again laid across with smaller sticks, instead of laths, andthen thatched over a great thickness with the rice-straw, which wasstrong, like reeds; and at the hole or place which was left to go in orout by the ladder I had placed a kind of trap-door, which, if it had beenattempted on the outside, would not have opened at all, but would havefallen down and made a great noise--as to weapons, I took them all intomy side every night. But I needed none of all this precaution; for neverman had a more faithful, loving, sincere servant than Friday was to me:without passions, sullenness, or designs, perfectly obliged and engaged;his very affections were tied to me, like those of a child to a father;and I daresay he would have sacrificed his life to save mine upon anyoccasion whatsoever--the many testimonies he gave me of this put it outof doubt, and soon convinced me that I needed to use no precautions formy safety on his account.
This frequently gave me occasion to observe, and that with wonder, thathowever it had pleased God in His providence, and in the government ofthe works of His hands, to take from so great a part of the world of Hiscreatures the best uses to which their faculties and the powers of theirsouls are adapted, yet that He has bestowed upon them the same powers,the same reason, the same affections, the same sentiments of kindness andobligation, the same passions and resentments of wrongs, the same senseof gratitude, sincerity, fidelity, and all the capacities of doing goodand receiving good that He has given to us; and that when He pleases tooffer them occasions of exerting these, they are as ready, nay, moreready, to apply them to the right uses for which they were bestowed thanwe are. This made me very melancholy sometimes, in reflecting, as theseveral occasions presented, how mean a use we make of all these, eventhough we have these powers enlightened by the great lamp of instruction,the Spirit of God, and by the knowledge of His word added to ourunderstanding; and why it has pleased God to hide the like savingknowledge from so many millions of souls, who, if I might judge by thispoor savage, would make a much better use of it than we did. From henceI sometimes was led too far, to invade the sovereignty of Providence,and, as it were, arraign the justice of so arbitrary a disposition ofthings, that should hide that sight from some, and reveal it to others,and yet expect a like duty from both; but I shut it up, and checked mythoughts with this conclusion: first, that we did not know by what lightand law these should be condemned; but that as God was necessarily, andby the nature of His being, infinitely holy and just, so it could not be,but if these creatures were all sentenced to absence from Himself, it wason account of sinning against that light which, as the Scripture says,was a law to themselves, and by such rules as their consciences wouldacknowledge to be just, though the foundation was not discovered to us;and secondly, that still as we all are the clay in the hand of thepotter, no vessel could say to him, "Why hast thou formed me thus?"
But to return to my new companion. I was greatly delighted with him, andmade it my business to teach him everything that was proper to make himuseful, handy, and helpful; but especially to make him speak, andunderstand me when I spoke; and he was the aptest scholar that ever was;and particularly was so merry, so constantly diligent, and so pleasedwhen he could but understand me, or make me understand him, that it wasvery pleasant for me to talk to him. Now my life began to be so easythat I began to say to myself that could I but have been safe from moresavages, I cared not if I was never to remove from the place where Ilived.