September 7, 1944
Emil arrived with a frown on his face. He had an envelope in his hand and my heart filled with dread. It was the letter.
Before Emil could say anything I burst into tears. He held me and stroked my back but kept silent. There were no words that could comfort me. Emil was leaving again.
September 15, 1944
If only all days could be as wonderful as this one! Emil and I strolled through the park by St. Stephens along the riverside. The air had cooled and the autumn leaves fell casually. From there, downtown Passau looked locked in time, unscathed by war.
I fought back tears. “I can't believe you're leaving.”
Emil took my hand and weaved his fingers through mine. “Me neither.”
“Everything just seems so hopeless.” I sighed. “It can’t be much longer now, can it? A year maybe?”
Emil squeezed my hand. “I hope so,” he said.“Maybe less.”
“I wonder what it will be like for us when it’s over,” I said. “I guess it means every German, you, me, everyone, will be prisoners of war.”
“Let’s just pray it’s the Americans or the British that capture us.”
I searched Emil’s face. “Why?”
Emil grimaced and shrugged.
“I’ve heard the Russian’s are especially brutal,” I said.
“I’ve heard this, also.”
“It’s so depressing.” I stopped mid-step and turned to face Emil. “You know, I like to dream about a different world. One where I get married, have children, build a home in a place where bombs aren’t falling. Where I’m not afraid all the time. Is that crazy? Am I a child?”
“I love you.” Emil blurted out. “I want to marry you.”
My heart stopped with shock and then I burst into tears again. For once it wasn’t due to fear or anger. His declaration made me insanely happy.
“Katharina?” Emil ducked to catch my gaze.
“Oh, Emil. I love you, too.”
I kissed him hard and wished more than anything that everything was different. That Emil and I could runaway and hide. Forget about the war and just love each other.
Emil pulled back and smiled brightly. He was so handsome!
“I wish I could give you something to remember this day by, so that you won’t forget me,” he said.
I grinned and then tugged the loose blue thread from the missing button on my coat. “We can do like the American’s do,” I said.
Emil took it and carefully, understanding what I wanted, wrapped it around my finger.
“Voila,” he said.
“It’s perfect,” I gushed. He tied a knot, making sure the string wasn't wrapped too tightly, but secure enough that it wouldn't fall off. “You are spoken for, young lady.”
I held my hand out in front as if I were showing off a ten karat diamond. “That I am.”
September 22, 1944
My heart is breaking. I cry into my pillow as I remember standing together on a platform at the train station. The sign above our heads said Nach Nuremberg. Emil had already said good-bye to his mother and little brother, so that he could spend the remainder of his time with me.
My cheeks were moist with tears, and Emil kissed the salty wetness away, holding me tight.
“It will be okay,” he soothed. “We will see each other again soon. Remember, only a year and then our life together can begin.”
“Promise me?” I said.
“I promise.”
The train arrived and our parting was torture. I felt physically destroyed as I watched Emil board. He blew me a kiss through the open window and I reached out to him as I ran alongside. My chest felt heavy like my lungs might collapse. I choked out a sob as I watched the train disappear into the distance.
“Only a year,” I whispered. “Only a year.”
It might be a dream, but we were dreaming it together. Finally, my weeping subsided and my eyes close in surrender. I dream of Emil’s return.
About the Author
Lee Strauss writes historical and science fiction/romance for upper YA and adult readers. She also writes light and fun stuff under the name Elle Strauss. To find out more about Lee and her books check out her facebook page. You can also follow her on twitter @elle_strauss and on Pinterest. To find out about new releases sign up for her newsletter at www.ellestraussbooks.com
Read on for the first Chapter of PLAYING WITH MATCHES
PROLOGUE
1945
JULY