“The story gets better,” she told him. “The Union soldier she saved went on to become a congressman from Massachusetts—and he helped fight to stop the punitive measures toward the postwar South.” She touched the ornament tenderly. “When I was little, her daughter, my great-grandmother, used to tell me that angels did influence our lives, and that they helped us sometimes, when we didn’t even know they were there. I like to believe that, Bobby.”
“Sure, Mom.” He gave her a hug. He marveled at his mother, and he had to wonder if people did come together for a reason. His mom was the ray of hope and light. His father was the doomsayer. They could both be right; Mike MacDougal had seen all the worst that man had to offer his fellow man. Stacy believed in the goodness that she felt prevailed among most people.
“They’ve been out there a while,” Bobby said. “I think I’ll help. Maybe there’s a bicycle out there and those misfits are dropping all the pieces!” With a quick kiss on the cheek, he left her, striding to the door for his heavy coat.
The snow kept falling in huge, wet flakes and the wind blew hard. Morwenna felt as if she was battling a storm in the Antarctic as she made her way to the garage. When she reached the side door, it was a fight against the wind to open it. But she suddenly felt desperate; she could see through the four-paned little window that Gabe was standing close to her brother by the trunk of his car.
The door flew open, slamming against the wooden wall of the garage.
Both men looked toward her; Gabe hurried over, drawing her in and closing the door.
“Hey!” Shayne said. “What are you doing out here? It’s freezing!”
“I, um, you were taking some time. I thought you might need help,” Morwenna said. She felt a little ridiculous, and then not. They didn’t know Gabe Lange.
“Oh, we were just talking,” Shayne told her. “I was showing Gabe some of the things for the kids.”
“And we were discussing the merits of live action versus video games,” Gabe said. “Shayne’s right—this one electronic thingy he got for Connor is great—it’s a word game, teaches you how to spell, and what the definitions for the words are once they’re found. And you win funny little cars with each correct answer—virtual cars.”
“Will it work—does it have to be downloaded?” Morwenna asked. “I’m surprised we still have electricity. The cable is down, and none of the phones work.”
“It’s battery operated, and doesn’t need any downloads, so Connor will be able to play with it no matter, tomorrow,” Shayne said. “I have to admit, I think the kids had a great time tonight—without electronic devices.”
“Who knew you’d make such a great Mr. Mean?” Morwenna said lightly.
Shayne half smiled. “It was fun. I really had fun.”
“Do you write children’s books?” Gabe asked her.
“No! Oh, Lord, no,” Morwenna said. “I’m an executive at an ad agency in Manhattan.”
“Yeah, I heard that. But, people may do one thing for a living, and another on the side. I thought that maybe you wrote for children on the side. And I take it that you draw a lot?” Gabe asked.
“Sure. Sometimes. I always loved to draw.”
“Once upon a time you spent a lot more time just doodling,” Shayne said.
“I can’t. I mean, I don’t really have the time. Not anymore. Now I spend a lot of time in meetings,” Morwenna said.
“You should illustrate,” Gabe said.
She hesitated. She could have explained that she had intended to, things hadn’t quite gone in the direction she had intended. “I don’t really have the time,” she said simply. “I can come up with the creatures, but I’m not sure what they should be doing. A story needs a beginning, a middle and an end.”
“But you could work with someone else, right?” Gabe asked her.
“Sure,” she murmured. “Maybe in my retirement.”
“I guess we all do what we need to do in life,” Gabe said. “You’re good. And it’s obvious that you love it. Maybe take a sketch pad on your next vacation.”
“This is my vacation,” she said.
“Morwenna is mourning the fact that she’s not in Cancún,” Shayne told him.
“I am not! I chose to be here,” Morwenna said.
Shayne laughed and brushed her cheek with his knuckles, teasing her as he had when they’d been in high school. “Sense of duty, right, sis? Her lover boy is off in Cancún, and she must be dying to know what he’s up to.”
“Shayne, please, it’s a mature relationship,” Morwenna said.
“Ah,” Gabe said knowingly. “Like an open relationship?”
“No! Oh, for God’s sake, please. It’s possible to have a relationship in which people remain monogamous when they’re apart,” Morwenna said.
“Sure,” Shayne said, turning away.
“It is!” Morwenna insisted.
“I was agreeing with you, Morwenna. I’m sorry—I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was just teasing, really,” Shayne said.
“You didn’t hurt me,” she protested. A lie! She worried; if it had been a really good relationship, wouldn’t he have told the others just to be adults and have a good time on their own because he wanted to be with the woman he loved at Christmas?
Or were their values simply different? she wondered. It was hard to admit; she had come because of a sense of duty. But she had also wanted to come—Christmas to her had always been this house on top of the mountain. New Year’s might be right for a wild jaunt, but Christmas meant being with the ones she loved. That didn’t negate other values, she assured herself. It was just what it meant to her.
“I’m not a family member, but I’m glad that you’re here,” Gabe told her. “It’s been nice to meet you.”
She gave him a weak smile. Really? I’d have thought about leaving you in the snow; I’m my father’s daughter, braving the trenches of Manhattan in a state of continual suspicion.
She wasn’t sure what to reply.
“Well, you made a great Christmas elf,” she told him.
“I’m going to haul in the first bag of stuff,” Shayne said. He grimaced. “We were talking about putting the bicycle together out here…keep all the packing and stuff out of the house,” he said.
“We were just about to start, and I’m afraid the reality may be as hard as the imagery we were playing with before,” Gabe said.
“I’m good with directions. I’ll help,” Morwenna said.
“Okay, you two get started. I’ll be right back. Or as soon as the wind will let me,” Shayne told them.
Gabe got the door so Shayne could head out with a large canvas bag. She saw that the box with the bike parts was already on the floor, opened. “Where are the directions?” she asked Gabe.
“Right here,” he said, handing her a sheet from the top of the box.
“Easy. A1 goes to A2, as soon as you have B1 connected to C1, and then, somehow, D2 has been thrown into the lot. Ah, there’s E3!”
Gabe groaned, and started pulling all the pieces out of the box. They knelt down together to study the diagram.
Morwenna couldn’t help but be aware of him as a man, and she found herself wondering how she would have felt about him if they’d met under different circumstances. But, of course, this was a strange circumstance, and she was committed.
She had never been able to date casually. Of course, she’d dated Alex before they’d become a couple, and she’d found it awkward and difficult. Her friends in Manhattan had tried hard to teach her that every dinner didn’t have to lead to sex, and that she wasn’t obligated to have sex, but then again, didn’t she want it now and then? In college, she’d had one relationship, and they had both been honest and committed, and then, at graduation, they had realized the bond wasn’t strong enough for either of them to change their goals in life, and they had parted as friends. And eventually, of course, their calls had grown infrequent, and time had gone by.
Then, Alex had come into the firm, and the first time t
hey’d gone out, she’d been smitten. She’d still held back until they’d been seeing each other for a few months, and the time had been right, and she’d believed that they both really cared about each other. She had to admit to herself, though, that they hadn’t used the all-important four-letter word yet—love.
“Hand over A1 there, will you?” Gabe asked. “The body of the beast!”
She did so.
“Your brothers are really good guys,” he told her.
“Love them to pieces,” she said. “I just wish that…”
He looked up at her. “What?”
Morwenna looked back at him for a moment, wondering how he managed to make them all talk about things that they wouldn’t share often. With each other. With anyone. If they spoke to each other, they fought. And they weren’t really into airing private grievances with others.
She laughed suddenly. “You’re reminding me of how it was when we were kids. I could be ready to throttle Shayne or Bobby, but if anyone else said something about them, I’d be ready to throttle that person.”
Gabe grinned. “I guess that’s the way it should be.”
“I think that Shayne’s current situation is just terribly painful. He really loved Cindy. I don’t think he was a great husband. I mean, he’s so dedicated to his patients. Oh, he adores his kids, but Cindy was the one who was with them most, and I think he’s as happy as can be that he does have them for Christmas, but without Mom and Dad or Cindy, I don’t think he remembers how to do Christmas.”
Gabe found the “screwdriver included!” bag and nodded as he divided his attention between her and his task. “The most intelligent people in the world can usually look around and figure out what would fix things for someone else, and yet struggle with their own situation,” he said.
“Genevieve broke my heart tonight. In her prayers, she basically asked God to put her parents back together.”
“That’s natural.”
“And probably impossible. Cindy, I’m sure, thought long and hard before she left my brother.”
“Nothing is impossible while we’re drawing breath, kid,” he said lightly.
“Then you believe in miracles, huh?” Morwenna asked him.
“If you think about it, life itself is a miracle. Sure, I believe in miracles.” He grinned at her, pausing for a moment. “Just like your little play—miracles are out there. We have to make them happen.”
“Well, you’re just like Little Miss Sunshine, Pollyanna and a ray of light, all rolled into one,” Morwenna said. “Life isn’t like that. It’s all messy, and complicated, and I’m sure that Shayne tried to fix things. Sometimes, when things are broken, they’re shattered, and that’s that.”
He laughed and sat back for a moment, staring at her. “Wow! From what I can see, you all have a really good life going here. The three of you grew up with parents who really love you. They have their personalities and their opinions, but they love you, and it’s obvious that every move they’ve ever made was with your best interests at heart. Shayne is doing what he loves for a living. You have a good job, even if it’s not what you planned, and if you had any balls, you would do what you really wanted. Your problem with the fellow your brother referred to as lover boy or boy toy is probably the fact that you decided you needed someone, even if he wasn’t the right one, and you’re really not happy with yourself, so you’re playing the game of trying to assemble the right pieces. Bobby—”
“Yeah, go on, pick on Bobby, the dropout!” Morwenna said, angry and about to get to her feet and leave.
“I was about to say that Bobby is the one on the right track. He knows what he wants—and he’s going to go after it. His biggest fear is hurting those who love him while he’s on the way. All that he needs is a little faith.”
Morwenna frowned. “What are you talking about?”
“Your brother really is a brilliant musician. Have you ever really listened to him play? He’s amazing. He wants to pursue it. But in your family music is a hobby. Bobby can make more out of it, he just feels he has to prove to all of you that he can do it before he really gives it his whole heart. But he’s moving in the right direction.”
“Well, thank you, Mr. Cop-without-a-badge or-uniform!” Morwenna said. “And how do I fix my life?”
“Oh, Morwenna, that’s so easy. Quit playing the game. Stop trying to fix other people, and support them, in whatever they need. Don’t try to play any roles in life, and stop and think about what you really want,” he told her.
“So simple!” she told him with heat. “So simple—and maybe you might want to think about life that way yourself! You’re just great at pointing out problems. Surely you have something in your life that you’re not dealing with. Maybe you should worry about yourself.”
“I didn’t mean to be intrusive,” he said. “You’re just good people—you should be happy.”
“What is happy? I mean, who is happy every single minute?”
“Content, then. Happiness is going through life with problems, and yet knowing where you’re going, and enjoying the moments that are filled with laughter and love.”
I am happy! she thought defensively.
Was she?
She turned away from him. This time of year, getting together—it could be one of those times when they were just happy, and appreciating one another.
“Hey,” he said softly, and she looked up at him. For a moment, she felt as if the fleeting seconds of time they shared, on the floor in the cold of the garage, were some of the most intimate she had ever known. His eyes were a green like the grass in summer. They seemed to speak in a whisper to her soul. She wanted to touch his face, and marvel that anything with such rugged appeal could be so tender and knowing.
She almost moved back. She liked him. And she was in a relationship, and she wasn’t going to have any dreams about a stranger suddenly cast on their doorstep.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I can see that you all wind up in tangles because you do love one another so much. But here’s the good—whether or not there is a miracle and Cindy and Shayne wind up back together or not, they’re on their way to being the best they can possibly be. Cindy sent those kids here, right? Likely because she decided that they should have a real family Christmas, even if that meant it was one without her.”
Morwenna sighed. “Shayne thinks she wanted quality time with the new love of her life.”
“Well, of course he does. Someday he’ll step back and rethink that.”
“What’s this about Bobby? He’s my brother—what do you think you know about him that I don’t?” Morwenna demanded.
“You should ask Bobby,” he told her. “Hand me part D3a, will you, please?”
She did so. For a moment, she didn’t really see him. She rose awkwardly, thinking about the things Gabe had told her. It was true; Shayne was hurting. And Bobby…
She wanted to talk to her brother. Alone.
“There we go!” Gabe said.
Startled, she looked back to him. He had risen as well; the bike was completely assembled.
“Wow,” she said.
He grinned. “Not bad, eh?”
“Not bad at all. Now, all we have to do is get it to the house in this storm.”
As she spoke, the garage door opened with a thud. Bobby, bracing himself, stood in the doorway.
“Thank the Lord! It’s done, and I don’t have to help,” he said, eyeing the bike.
“That’s the ticket,” Morwenna said. She smiled at her younger brother. “Get here as soon as it’s done. But you can help. We have to get the bike up to the house. Where is Shayne? I thought he was coming right back?”
“Connor called him from upstairs—he wanted a glass of water. And maybe he still believes in Santa, just a little, because he didn’t want to come down the stairs—maybe jinx the possibility,” Bobby said. “Shayne’s with him now.”
“Good for them both,” Morwenna said, her voice a little husky. She realized that she was fighting the de
sire to cry. They did have their health. They had each other. People, good people, were out of work, starving in America and around the world.
She walked over to her brother and gave him a fierce hug. “I love you, Bobby.” Then she hurried out of the garage and headed for the house.
Despite the cold and the wind, she paused. The bright lights of the Christmas tree shone out on the crystal-white glitter of the snow. It was beautiful. The warmth inside beckoned to her.
Life itself was a miracle.
And the beauty of the night, even in the wind and snow, was astounding. She smiled to herself, thoughts swirling in a real prayer.
Happy birthday, Jesus. And thank you.
“Easier said than done!” Bobby laughed. He had the back half of the bike; Gabe had the front. It wasn’t even that big a bike; it was just awkward making their way through the snowdrifts to the house. When they reached the door, though, Morwenna was waiting, and they were able to walk right in, shedding snowflakes as they did so. Bobby stared at Morwenna, feeling awkward for a moment. He smiled at her.
She smiled back.
Shayne came down the stairs just as they entered.
“Hey! Great. That’s amazing! It’s already together!”
“Your sister reads directions well,” Gabe said.
“Let’s put that right here, to the left of the tree,” Stacy suggested. “Shayne, you did a great job getting stuff here at the last minute for the children.”
“Thanks,” he said huskily. “Too bad I can’t give them the one thing they really want.”
“No, not Cindy,” Morwenna said, walking over to Shayne. She stood on her toes and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “But they’ve got their dad, and you’re a great dad, Shayne.”
“I suck,” Shayne admitted.
“But you’re already working on not sucking,” Bobby said. “So all is good! Mom, the tree looks great. Absolutely great.”
“I just have to sneak up to my room when I’m sure Genevieve is deep asleep to get a few more things,” Morwenna said. “I have a little dress-up set I’d bought for Alex’s niece and a comic-book creature one of our clients gave me. My real gifts for the kids went through Cindy, of course, but they’ll have something from me.”