“Oh!” I looked at it uncertainly and then sniffed it.
“It’s wine—a very good wine, I think,” Laish murmured. “Now you must add a single drop of your own blood as well.”
“Why?” I wasn’t sure why he wanted me to—it wasn’t the usual ritual. In fact, the only ritual I could think of that required a drop of each of the participants’ blood in a cup consecrated to the Goddess was the handfasting rite. It was a binding together of the male and female spirits—a kind of marriage in a way. But I was certain that wasn’t what Laish was after—was it? “Why do you need my blood in the cup too?” I asked again when he didn’t answer.
“Because mortal magic in Hell is tricky,” he said, clearly catching my confused look. “You must bind yourself to the spell to make it work, just as I have. Blood is binding.”
“Well…all right.” Lifting the athame, I pricked my index finger and let a single droplet of blood fall into the ruby red wine. Laish nodded in satisfaction.
“Very good. Now raise a cup to the Goddess, mon ange, and let us continue.”
I shrugged. “Fine. Though I doubt she’d be able to hear us or help us in Hell—or even that she’d want to.” Then I raised the cup and spoke a blessing, calling on the Goddess to hear us and bless our efforts that night. I took a sip and handed it to Laish. He also sipped and for a brief moment, I thought I saw his eyes glowing a bright, ruby red, almost like two red stars. Then they subsided and he placed the chalice back on the altar.
“All right,” I said. “It’s done. Who do you want me to summon?”
“You will not be doing the summoning tonight, my little witch.” His eyes gleamed. “I will.”
Then with a wave of his hand and a word of power so strong it made my eyes sting and my eardrums throb, he brought someone else into the circle.
Chapter Twenty-nine
Gwendolyn
For a moment, I didn’t recognize the figure crouching on the sand in front of us. Then he lifted his head and I saw the gleam of a single golden tooth in the front of his mouth.
“Oh my Goddess…” I took a step back and the chalice fell from my nerveless fingers, red wine gurgling over the thirsty sand which soaked it up immediately. “What have you done, Laish?”
“Where the fuck am I?” the man demanded. “Hey…” He squinted at me. “Ain’t you Keisha’s big sister? The one always tryin’ to get her to leave me?”
“You…you…” I took a step back but I needn’t have bothered. Laish pointed one finger at the man and uttered another word of power.
The man—Ray, my little sister’s pimp—was suddenly frozen in place. I saw his muscles tensing and twitching under the dirty baggy jeans and stained white wife-beater t-shirt he wore. But he clearly wasn’t going anywhere. There was nothing wrong with his voice, though.
“Hey, let me go! What did you do to me, you bitch?” he demanded, clearly thinking I was the reason for his immobility.
“I’ll thank you to keep a civil tongue in your head when you speak to my consort,” Laish told him, coming around to stand in front of the crouching man. “Or you risk getting it cut out.”
The silver athame was suddenly in his hand but instead of using it on the pimp, he held it out to me.
“Come, Gwendolyn,” he said in a calm voice. “You have called the circle and we have summoned a known criminal—a corruptor of souls and a defiler of innocence—into our midst. This will be a justified kill—it need not stain your soul forever, not now that the proper precautions have been taken.”
“What…what are you saying?” I backed away from him, refusing to take the athame.
“I’m saying that this man, who has hurt your sister so deeply for so many years, needs to die. And you need a way to pay the Sin Tax and break the barrier between us and the Abyss. All your problems can be solved in one fell swoop if you will only wield the knife.” He held it out to me, more insistently this time.
Finally my numb brain thawed and I understood.
Laish hadn’t had me call the circle to perform a summoning…no, what he wanted was a sacrifice.
“I…I don’t know.” My words came out as a croak.
“Come, you were more than ready last night when you saw him harming your sister in the mirror.” Laish took my hand impatiently and put the knife into it, curling my numb fingers around the handle. “Do it, Gwendolyn,” he insisted in a low voice. “I cannot do it for you—you must make the stroke that ends his miserable life to pay the tax.”
Feeling like I was moving in a dream, I took a tighter grip on the knife and moved in to stand by the man who had caused my little sister so much grief and pain. He’d hooked her on drugs, beaten her, used her sexually and whored her out to other men like she was nothing but an object to be bought and sold. He’d treated her the way I wouldn’t treat a dog I didn’t like and I hated him for it—loathed him for it.
Laish is right, I thought grimly. He deserves to die.
I took hold of his mop of greasy brown hair and yanked his head back, baring his dirty throat.
“Hey, now lady—don’t do that! What the hell, I mean—”
Laish spoke another word of power and Ray fell silent. His mouth was clenched tight, his jaw muscles bunching as though he was still trying to speak but nothing came out. Not that I would have cared what he said, even if he’d been able to talk.
I raised the athame high, intending to bring it down and cut his throat in a single, savage slice. I would kill him for all he had done to Keisha. I would sacrifice his life and in so doing, save my own—save my power from being halved.
Then I heard a little voice, speaking in my ear.
Not like this, Gwendolyn! it cried. He deserves to die but not like this—not by your hand! You’ll never be the same person if you do this—you’ll never be able to look at yourself in the mirror again. Don’t lower yourself to this level. Don’t stain your soul. Don’t!
The strange, dream-like state I’d somehow fallen into abruptly shattered and I realized what I’d been about to do. I’d been about to kill a man—to commit murder. Call it what you want—a sacrifice…a justified killing…but what it boiled down to was murder.
I’d wanted Ray dead for years—wanted him out of Keisha’s life. The revenge spell I’d been working on would have caused him to wither away as long as he was with her. He would have wound up an old man in a matter of months and if he continued to harass her, he eventually would have died. But working a spell of revenge from a distance and actually slitting his throat and watching the ruby streams of blood pump out onto the sand were two different things. I hated this man with my whole heart but could I actually kill him in cold blood? Could I let myself go that far into the darkness? A darkness from which I might never return?
Last night I had been willing. But then I had been under the influence of the HellSpawn, manipulating me through the mirror, and the darkness had nearly swallowed me. I had called the evil into myself, willing myself to be able to kill. And I understood now that was the only way I could commit this act—the only way I could take his life. Should I open myself to the evil again? Could I do it again?
My answer came when the athame fell from my hand to thump harmlessly on the sand at my feet.
“I can’t,” I whispered, backing away from the straining Ray, whose eyes were rolling crazily in his frozen face. “I can’t do this—I’m sorry.”
“Think before you make your decision, Gwendolyn,” Laish said softly, picking up the athame. His eyes were glowing like two red stars and I thought I had never seen him look so handsome…or so demonic.
“You’re tempting me,” I accused him breathlessly.
“No, I am trying to save you grief. You have only two choices here,” he murmured. “Either surrender your innocence to me and lose half your power, or sacrifice the hornless goat and kill this man who has wronged your sister. No other sins are strong enough to pay the tax and pass through the barrier into the Abyss.”
“I know,” I whispered, backing away.
“I know it, Laish but I…I can’t. Grams wouldn’t want me to—wouldn’t want me to go all the way into the darkness. And…and I don’t want to either. I know you said it wouldn’t stain my soul forever but it would. And it would change me. I wouldn’t be the same person anymore. I’d be someone else—someone I wouldn’t like. Someone I don’t want to be.”
He stood for a moment, holding the athame loosely in one hand and regarding me with a mixture of sadness and resignation on his face. Then he nodded once.
“So mote it be,” he said and plunged the silver athame’s blade directly into Ray’s heart.
The pimp gave a choked gurgle and then collapsed on the ground. Before his blood could even stain the sand, Laish made a violent gesture and spoke another word of power. As suddenly as he had appeared, Ray vanished.
There was nothing left to show that he had been there at all but the equipment Laish had brought for the summoning and the throbbing of my own sore heart.
* * * * *
Laish
I had known that she wouldn’t be able to perform the sacrifice. Not my tender hearted little witch. As much as she planned and schemed for her revenge spell, I knew that when it came to the point, she would be unable to commit murder.
I, as a demon, however, had no such qualms. This man deserved to die. I had done some quiet checking into his life before deciding on this course of action and Keisha was not the only girl whose life he had ruined and whose innocence he had despoiled. He was not above murder himself, either. A life for a life has always been the rule from ancient times and this man owed many. I was happy to make him pay if for no other reason than to free my beloved’s cherished sister from bondage to him.
I was worried, however, about the way Gwendolyn was looking at me. There was fear in her green eyes now—fear and rage. I hadn’t anticipated this, though perhaps I should have. She was ever a strong-willed woman—it was no wonder she was angry at me for manipulating her. If only she knew that was the least of what I had in mind—there were even greater betrayals in store. But for now, this was sufficient to make her enraged with me, I could see.
“You…how could you?” she whispered, her voice trembling. “How could you put me in that position? What are you doing—tempting me to stain my soul so completely I’ll have no chance to go to Heaven when I die? Is that it? You want me to wind up here in Hell with you permanently?”
“The thought had crossed my mind,” I said, honestly enough. “But no, that was not my plan.” Little did she know I had more direct methods in mind to tie her to me.
“Then what?” She walked around the sacred circle she had called, blowing out the candles. “Why make me participate in that…that perversion of a ritual?”
“To give you another way to pay the tax without losing your innocence,” I said, trying to make my voice soft and coaxing.
Behind her I could see through the barrier into the Abyss. It was a vast, bottomless pit filled with evil creatures older than time—the Ancient Ones. Their long tentacles were writhing and reaching, searching to clutch any unwary soul that came too close.
And there, on the far side of that chasm of nightmares, was a shining, silver light. Just a slender beam but I could see it—it was coming from the door that my little witch had left open when she rescued her friend. It was a door that only someone with her soul signature could close and it was balanced on the furthest, most dangerous edge of the Abyss.
An edge I could not let her walk.
“Gwendolyn…” I stepped towards her but she eluded my touch. I was having none of that, however. “Gwendolyn,” I said again and took her by the shoulders.
“Let me go!” She struggled but I held her firmly—I needed to look her in the face when I said what I had to say.
“What is it?” she snapped and her green eyes were filled with rage and pain. “What do you want with me?”
“Only to let you know this—I care for you deeply, my darling. More deeply than I can say.”
“I know how you feel. I just…don’t understand why you did what you did.” She blinked, trying not to cry. It made my heart sore to see her pain but I knew I must continue—there was no other way.
“Gwendolyn,” I murmured. “Do you really think I want to hold you against your will? There are so many other ways I could have done that if I wished. The very food of the Infernal Realm has the power to damn you to Hell for eternity but have I not fed you of myself to keep that from happening?”
“Well…yes,” she admitted grudgingly. I could see her relenting and so I pressed a little harder.
“Have I not protected you and sacrificed for you and shielded you from harm as well as I am able?”
“Yes,” she whispered.
“Gwendolyn,” I whispered, stroking her cheek. “Did the Mirror of the Eye not show that you are in my heart? You know that I cannot be lying to you when I tell you how I feel for you.”
“I know.” She nodded and pressed her soft cheek into my palm. “I know, Laish.”
I had her exactly where I wanted her and it made my heart ache. Yet, there was no other way now—she had rejected the sacrifice so this was my only path forward. I had to keep her safe, even if it made her hate me later.
I looked into her eyes. “Mon ange, I love you,” I murmured.
“I…I know. I’m sorry I don’t know how I feel for you. I’m so confused right now.”
“It doesn’t matter,” I told her gently. “All that matters is that you know I care for you too much to trap you and tie you to me against your will.”
I told the lie with all the sincerity that I could muster though it tasted like ashes in my mouth. I did care for her—that was true. I loved her as much as my dark, demon’s heart would let me love. But I would tie her to me if I could—it was the only way to save her.
The only way to keep her safe.
* * * * *
Gwendolyn
I wished I could tell Laish that I loved him too but I just didn’t know how to feel. After watching him kill Ray with the silver athame as calmly as if he was snuffing out a candle flame, I felt all twisted into knots inside.
He’s a demon, I told myself. I’m sure this isn’t the first time he’s killed—hell, it’s probably not even the hundredth or the thousandth.
Somehow, the thought failed to comfort me. All I could think was that Laish had killed Ray for me—that even though I hadn’t wielded the knife, I was still somehow to blame. The realization gave me a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.
My inner turmoil was made worse by the fact that I was fiercely glad that the evil bastard was dead. Free—Keisha’s finally free! I couldn’t help thinking. That son of a bitch, Ray got what was coming to him.
Yes, he had—but at what cost?
The strange stew of emotions and the aftershock of the killing made me dizzy. I put a hand to my head, feeling like the world was spinning around me.
“Gwendolyn, are you all right?” Laish put an arm around me, supporting me as he looked at me anxiously.
“Fine, just…I think I need to sit down a minute.” I started to sit down on the sandy ground but he stopped me.
“We can do better than that.” With a wave of his hand, a small but lovely pavilion-type tent appeared. It was made of some kind of yellow silky fabric with a round top and was lit from within by a golden light.
“Whoa—what’s that?” I eyed it uncertainly.
“A place to rest.” Laish supported me as he led me into the tent. Inside it had a broad, comfortable looking bed heaped with plush pillows and spread with linens the same pale yellow as the tent itself. There was an old fashioned oil lamp glowing softly on the bedside table. Laish even showed me a flap on one wall that led to a small shower area stocked with my favorite body wash and fluffy towels.
“This is gorgeous,” I said, looking around the small but luxurious tent. “But I thought you were trying to conserve your power.”
“That was before,” he said. “I will shortly have eno
ugh power to deal with any number of problems.”
Slowly, the meaning behind his words sank in.
“Oh, you mean after we…” I cleared my throat—it was still hard to say the words out loud but somehow I made myself. “You mean after we make love,” I made myself say.
He nodded gravely. “Yes, that’s right.”
“So you’ll get a power surge out of it—out of taking my, uh, innocence?” I tried not to sound bitter but it was difficult—especially since my own power was soon to be cut in half.
Laish sighed. “Yes, but I cannot help that, mon ange. I can no more help getting power from lust than you can help getting energy from the food you eat or oxygen from the air you breathe.”
“All right,” I said grudgingly. “I get the point. It’s not your fault you’re going to get a charge out of it when you take my virginity.”
“I am hoping that I will not have to,” he said quietly.
“What? What do you mean?” I asked, trying not to sound too eager and hopeful. “You think there’s a chance we won’t have to have sex?”
Laish frowned. “A very slim chance—probably no chance at all. Still, I think it is worth taking our time and trying things slowly. Though it is my guess that only taking the act to completion will pay the tax and break the barrier, it is always possible that something less might work.”
“Something less? Like what?”
“Like simply rubbing against one another with nothing between us,” Laish suggested. “Or perhaps simply the act of penetration will bring the barrier down.”
I frowned. “That’s no good. Penetration equals sex which equals loss of virginity.”
“Not by the rules of the Infernal Realm,” Laish countered. “We believe that virginity is not lost until after penetration and insemination.”
“Seriously?” I could hardly believe it. “So you think you can put your, uh, yourself inside me and as long as you don’t…don’t come in me…” I could feel my cheeks getting hotter and hotter as I spoke but I pressed on. “As long as you don’t do that, I’m still technically a virgin?”