arms around me in response. Chills ran down my arms as his
tongue danced with mine. Heat spread throughout my body when
his hands began to slowly run down my back.
Someone whistled. I jerked away. I only meant to give him
one tiny kiss, not maul him in public.
“Well, I don’t know about you, but I sure feel better.” He
grinned and kissed me one more time before grabbing my hand
and walking with me down the boardwalk. “Now what’s on your
mind?”
“You,” I answered honestly. “Are you okay?”
He stopped walking. Crap, why did his face look like I just
confessed to stealing his puppy?
“Um, sure.” He scratched his head and looked away. “I just,
I had some stuff going on with our agent. They still want to do the
show even though Alec and I are avidly against it. They want to
launch the show this fall and push our spring back, so we can
record while we shoot. Something about hitting the teen market, to
up ticket sales. I don’t know though.”
“You should do it.” I shrugged. “I mean, how bad could it
be? People already follow you and take pictures. Plus, don’t reality
shows only run for a few weeks?”
“How do you even know a reality show schedule?” He
laughed.
“I know you think I live under a rock.” I pushed him in the
side. “But, I’m not totally disconnected from the world.”
He cursed. “Six weeks. It would be six weeks of filming.”
“And you’d film here?”
“Yeah.” His eyes darted from my lips to my eyes then back
again. Had we stopped walking again? “But you’d be in the show
too, Alyssa. I mean, anyone I talk to, anyone I’m involved with
would be in the show. That’s a big decision not just for you, but for
me. I would hate to ruin someone’s life.” He paled instantly and
released my hand.
“Well, I mean. I…” Crap, how did I say what was on my
mind? “I, um… I—”
“Cat got your tongue?” Demetri chuckled.
More like Demetri Daniels has possession of every ounce of
common sense when I’m in his presence. “I like you,” I blurted.
“Hmm.” Demetri walked away from me and sat on the
concrete edge on the boardwalk. “When you say like, do you mean
as in, how I like ice cream?”
I rolled my eyes and moved to sit next to him. “Maybe.”
“Like as in… how much I like the way you taste?” he
whispered into my ear. I shivered and tried to scoot away, but he
held me trapped with his other arm. “Like as in how much I like
the way your hair smells like coconut?”
I reached up to touch my hair. Demetri played with a piece
of my hair and lifted it to his face, inhaling slowly. Oh my gosh, it
was so hot. I squirmed, but he still wouldn’t let me go.
“Like, as in, how much I like the way your hips sway when
you walk? Or the way your voice sounds on the phone? Or how
about…” He paused, oh gosh I couldn’t take much more of this. He
was killing me with his closeness. Why did he have to be so sexy?
“…how much I like the way my name sounds on your lips.
The way your name sounds on mine, or the way our hands fit
perfectly together. How about the way you drink your hot
chocolate? Damn, I could watch you drink hot chocolate all day.”
And I was going to pass out.
“Alyssa.” His eyes opened, and he held my chin with his
hand and murmured across my lips. “I really like you too.”
And insert mind-altering sensations here. Without even
realizing it, my hands had gripped his face and I pressed my lips
against his. I needed him to be real. I wanted so badly for us to be
feeling the same thing.
“I want him gone.” Demetri ended the kiss and looked out at
the crashing waves. “I’m not going to ask you to choose, because
I’m afraid it would be him. I’m afraid you would choose someone
who can’t give you this.” He grabbed my hand and placed it
against his chest. The thump of his heart slammed against my
hand. “I want to be your first and your last. I want to be your
everything. But I’m willing to wait until you’re ready for this. For
this feeling. I want you to memorize it. Memorize life, Alyssa.
Because that’s what I want for us. I want for us to live.”
How did he always know the right thing to say? I threw my
arms around his neck and held him. Tears burned at the back of my
eyes. I hated that he knew me well enough to know what he was
basically asking me to give up. I loved that he was willing to wait
for me. And I hated myself even more that I was forcing him to,
when I knew my heart was already his for the taking.
Chapter Twenty-six
Demetri
I held her shaking body for a few minutes. So many times I
opened my mouth to tell her the truth. To tell her all about Brady. It
would be so easy to swoop in and explain to her that she was
hugging the prince, that he wasn’t dead in the ground. Brady
wasn’t who she thought he was, but again it wasn’t my place.
Truthfully, I hadn’t been able to see her for very long these
past few days. I didn’t want to. It hurt too damn bad to look into
her innocent and hopeful eyes and keep the dirtiness of what Brady
did away from her. Not that Holly was innocent, but as a guy, I
knew the type of power trip Brady must have been feeling. Shit, up
until last year I’d lived that life.
Adding the whole Seaside show to the mix was enough to
put me into a catatonic state of stress. I swear I stared at my wall for
ten whole minutes doing nothing but breathing in and out and
trying to calm myself down. The stress was getting to me. I had the
taffy wrappers to prove it.
But when she texted me today. Damn. I couldn’t say no.
Everything felt better in her arms. Which was crazy. We’d known
each other for a little over a month, and I was ready to do anything
for her. I knew those type of feelings were possible. People always
talk about love at first sight. I’d never believed in it. Alec did
though, and so did Nat. But me, never.
And now, with Alyssa in my arms. Shit, I wanted to shout it
up and down the boardwalk that I was in love with this girl.
“Crap!” Alyssa pulled out of my embrace. Oh no. Her face
looked ashen. “Your birthday?”
I exhaled in relief. “About that…”
“Demetri!” She swatted me on the shoulder. “Is it soon? You
said Nat gave you that shirt for your birthday!”
“This weekend. Friday. Alec and Nat are throwing me a
huge party. I want you to come.” I swallowed the dryness in my
throat. “Be my date?” My palms began to sweat. Geez, you’d think
I never asked a girl out before.
Alyssa’s eyes lit up and then she frowned. “Don’t we have
group on Friday?”
“After group. I figured we could meet at your house for
group and then I could drive you to my house for the party.”
“And when were you going to tell me about all of this?”
>
“Today.” Okay, so I was lying. I meant to tell her yesterday
but still hadn’t had the balls to call her and see her face to face after
everything that went down with Holly.
“Short notice, Demetri. How am I going to have time to shop
for something to wear?”
“Just go to Victoria Secret.” I shrugged. “I’m sure they can
help you out.”
“So it’s a naked party then?” Her little hand pressed against
my chest and then ran down until she hooked her finger into the
loop of my jeans pulling me closer against her. Holy hell, a man
could die happy this way.
“Naked parties are the only way to go…” What the hell was
she doing? Her hand moved to my stomach and began rubbing just
above my briefs. Her nails lightly scratched, and I honestly thought
I was going to fall off the edge of the boardwalk. I swayed toward
her and closed my eyes.
“I don’t know if I like that you’ve been to naked parties.”
She purred, her wicked little hand still making me crazy.
“I don’t…” Damn, what was I going to say? “I mean, I…”
Holy. Hell. Her thumb rubbed across my hip bone, and I jerked
toward her on instinct.
“Demetri…” Her lips found mine. I was so hot for her I
wanted to toss her over the ledge and peel off her clothes one by
one, watching as the wind ran across her creamy skin and…”
“…ice cream.”
“Ice cream?” I repeated slowly coming out of my daydream.
What about ice cream? Wait, where did her hand go? Why was I
still so damn turned on?
“Let’s go get ice cream, and you can tell me all about your
party.” She winked and stood in front of me. If she expected me to
walk around right now she had another think coming. A minute
ago I didn’t even know what my name was. I glared. She tilted her
head and winked. She knew exactly what she was doing that
little… oh, but what a way to go.
“I need a minute.”
“Oh?” She tilted her head innocently.
I felt my nostrils flare. “One, two, three…”
“Wait, why are you counting?” She backed up slowly.
“Four, five, six…”
“Demetri…” She giggled and then snorted.
I stretched my arms above my head and yawned. “Seven,
eight, nine…”
Her eyes widened.
“Ten.” I lunged for her little body and caught her just as she
was turning to run. She kicked and screamed, but it was like a tiny
ant fighting a bear. I effortlessly carried her toward the ocean.
“Put me down!”
“Nope! I need to cool off…” I laughed as she began
screaming at me and pounding her tiny fists onto my back.
“Demetri Daniels!”
“Scream it again, sweetheart, only makes me need the ice
cold water more.”
She squirmed against me.
“Right.” I snorted and slapped her ass. “Because that helps.”
“Demetri!”
“Alyssa!” I yelled and then walked into the ocean with her
in my arms. When the water reached my knees I was sufficiently
cooled off. And then her eyes met mine and a different kind of heat
spread through my body. One I didn’t want to cool off. One I
wanted to remember for the rest of my life. I set her down on her
feet. The waves crashed against our legs, but I didn’t feel cold.
“I more than like you,” I whispered as I brushed the hair
whipping against her cheek from the wind.
She closed her eyes and sighed against my hand as it cupped
her cheek. “I more than like you too, which is what makes this so
hard.”
My stomach dropped. And the next thing I knew she pushed
me, causing my balance to falter just slightly, which would have
been fine if a wave hadn’t chosen that exact moment to crash right
next to us.
Okay, now I was cold.
“One.” I shouted as I jumped out of the chilling water.
She squealed. “Oh no, Demetri Daniels is counting again.
Two!” She joined in mocking me. She threw her head back and
laughed.
This time I didn’t even make it to three. I just tackled her
against the sand as the icy water crashed over us.
Chapter Twenty-seven
Alyssa
I couldn’t stop smiling. The hurt that was ever-present, the
memorial I kept with me was slowly fading and although I was
sad, I felt like it was time. And I had Demetri to thank for it. He
made me want to smile. He made me feel like it was okay to be
happy.
I twirled in front of the mirror. In a moment of panic I’d
texted Holly for help on what to wear for the party. She’d come to
my rescue as all girls should when another girl has a fashion crisis,
and I was again reminded how much I missed having girlfriends.
“It looks great,” Holly said from my bed. She’d asked if she
could come over early and get ready. Apparently Demetri invited
the entire group to his party, which was kind of awesome of him.
Could the guy do any wrong? I couldn’t match his personality now
with the rumors floating around about him. I’d had a weak
moment and searched the Internet at Mom and Dad’s store only to
find tons of things I’d rather have not known. It was obvious he
had a past, but it wasn’t my business. Besides, his hands were
sweating when he asked me to be his date, which meant he was
still human, and he was all mine.
“Thanks, Holly.” I walked over the bed and sat. My dress
crunched a bit. It was a strapless baby doll style dress. It was black
and silver with pieces of hanging material across the bodice making
it look kind of grunge and trendy. My heels were red. All in all, it
wasn’t something I would normally pick out for myself, but Nat
insisted. She had it overnighted just in case it wasn’t the right size,
and I needed to get it altered.
It fit perfect, and I felt really confident in it. I even let Holly
do some of my makeup. I hoped Demetri would feel proud to have
me on his arm.
Holly played with the fringe on her pale pink skirt. She
wasn’t talking much.
“Are you feeling okay?” I asked, suddenly concerned when
tears welled in her eyes.
She bit her lip and nodded. Strands of her chunky blond-
and brown-highlighted hair fell over her eye. “I’m fine, just feeling
kind of… off. It’s probably nerves about the party.”
Just then the doorbell rang. “Come on.” I grabbed her hand.
“We’ve gotta get through group first!”
I almost tripped down the stairs. It had been a while since I
wore heels. Dad glanced at me just as he reached for the door. His
mouth dropped open, he shook his head no a few times and then
walked off in a daze.
“I think I just put him in shock,” I said to Holly.
She laughed. “Imagine what it will do to Demetri.”
“That’s probably my dad’s problem — he was imagining
what Demetri would do.” He was probably going to complain to
my mom later about my dress. But I imagi
ned her hugging me
more than reprimanding me.
I opened the door and came face to face with Sam.
“Hey!” I gave him a hug. Geez, if I didn’t stop smiling
people were going to think I was on drugs.
“Um, hi.” His eyes took in my dress and then his smile
widened. “You look great, Alyssa. Demetri’s going to have a
stroke.”
I felt my cheeks heat with embarrassment as I looked away
from Sam.
“Can… um…” Sam looked passed me to Holly and then
grabbed my arm. “Can we go somewhere and talk really quick?”
“Sure.” I shrugged. “Holly, can you let everyone in?”
“Sure thing.” She saluted as I led Sam away from the door
and upstairs to my room.
Once we were inside I closed the door. “What’s up, Sam?”
“I can’t do this.” Sam paced in front of me.
“Do what?” My stomach dropped when I saw his eyes well
with tears.
“Damn, I just can’t do it anymore, Alyssa. It’s killing me.
You have no idea! I thought I was protecting you! That’s all I’ve
ever done is protect you! Make him into a damn martyr and wait
for you to admit it was me you liked, not him. Damn, I knew you
loved him. I just wanted you to love me too. But in the end I
couldn’t do it. I couldn’t do it. Damn regrets.”
I’d never heard Sam curse. Not once. Was he high? “Sam,
what are you talking about?”
“Six years,” he whispered hoarsely. “Six years I’ve been in
love with you. The last year you spent with Brady was the hardest.
I mean, he was my little brother. I couldn’t exactly move in on his
girlfriend, and then when everything happened, my feelings just
faded. I mean, I loved you, but you weren’t you anymore. You
know what I mean? The girl I fell in love with died right along with
my brother. And it was too damn painful to be around you,
because your smile was gone and it was his fault. All his fault. He
took his heart with you when he died and I was so afraid you’d
never get it back.”
“Why are you telling me this now?” I asked, voice shaking
with emotion. I wasn’t sure what I was. Angry? Confused? Hurt?
“Regrets. We’ve been talking about regrets in group. Want
to know what mine was?”
Not really. No. Because it may just take away the smile on
my face.
“I regretted not telling you how I felt about you, and then I