Page 18
“You’re awful quiet over there,” Alex says as we drive toward my house.
“Just thinking about Glenn. You really spoiled him tonight. ”
“No way. You can tell that’s a kid who deserves to be spoiled. ”
I smile because that’s so true. “He hasn’t had a lot of nice things in life. Money has always been so tight, but he’s the most appreciative kid you’ll ever meet. So yeah…I guess he deserves it. ”
Alex reaches across the seat and takes my hand in his. It’s an intimate move, and I can’t stop the tiny shiver that runs through me from the contact. He squeezes my hand and says, “I think you might deserve to be spoiled too. ”
I turn to look at him, the ambient lighting of the car’s stereo system emphasizing the sharp angles of his face. He turns to give me a brief glance and his eyes are serious, intent as they watch for my reaction.
“Alex—” I start to say, then I realize I have no clue what to say. His words are so heartfelt, yet tentative, because I can tell he has never spoken those words before.
Turning his attention back to the road, Alex pulls my hand across the expanse of the vehicle and brings it to his mouth. He grazes his lips across the inside of my wrist then releases his hold on me. That touch…oh, that touch of his lips. So seductive yet full of caring at the same time, I feel practically dizzy from the overwhelming emotions coursing through me.
“Sutton…I don’t know what this is…between us. But I know it’s something. I know it’s pulling me, and trust me when I tell you…nothing has pulled at me in a long time. ”
“I feel it too,” I admit in a whisper.
“Then let’s see where this goes,” he says confidently, and I’m nodding my head in agreement even as I say, “Okay. ”
But I do wonder…where exactly am I pulling Alex? I’d know if I only knew what direction I’m headed in myself. Does this have the potential to be something serious? Or does someone like Alex even do serious?
For all I know, his words tonight mean nothing more than he wants me to pull him straight into my bed. Maybe this is just sex. After all, that other girl—Cassie—she was just a hookup.
Maybe I’m just a hookup.
I search my feelings to see how I truly feel about that, and of course, I don’t like it. While I thought the other night that maybe my lack of feelings toward Brandon had something to do with the fact that I wanted to sow my wild oats like he had done, the simple truth of the matter is that I just can’t have casual sex.
Looking out the windshield, I see that Alex is pulling into my driveway, and I start to freak out—what if he’s expecting to get laid right now?
“I can’t have sex with you tonight,” I blurt out, because I need to be up-front with him.
His head jerks my way and even in the gloom of the dark car, I can see his lips curve upward. He ignores my statement for a moment. When he cuts the engine off, he turns to me and says, “Who said I want to have sex with you?”
“But…you said…there’s something…and that other woman…I thought that’s what you might want…. ” I drift off lamely, because now I’m suddenly confused and feeling like I misread the signals.
Alex gives a husky laugh. “I’m teasing you. And I didn’t intend to have sex with you tonight. Now, are you going to invite me in to show me your place, and then maybe we can hang for a little bit? I have to get home before too long to get packed for my trip. ”
Thank God it’s dark in the car because my face is flaming over my misconception of the matter. “Okay,” I mumble in response, and jump out of his SUV before he can make it over to my door to open it.
Alex follows me up my front porch and waits as I unlock the door. Flipping the lights on as we enter, I wait for him to come in and shut the door behind him. After I set my keys and purse down on one of the end tables, I ask, “Do you want something to drink?”
“No,” he says as he walks over and sits down on my couch.
“Do you want a tour of my house?” I ask, which seems ludicrously stupid.
“No. I want you to come sit down next to me,” he says as he pats the cushion. “I think I’d rather make out with you a little bit before I have to leave. ”
There go my palms again, sweating up a storm; I wipe them on my jean-clad thighs. He, of course, notices that move and I feel like an idiot.
“Are you nervous?” he asks.
“A little,” I admit as I walk toward him slowly.
When I reach the couch, he lifts a hand out to me and I put mine hesitantly in his, praying to God I got all the moisture off. He clasps me warmly and says, “I don’t bite. ”
Some of my nervousness melts away and I relax marginally, but then he gives a tug on my hand and I go falling toward him with a yelp. I land on his lap, and he expertly turns me to the side so my legs drape across the couch and his arm supports my back.
Alex is grinning at me, for some reason enjoying the tension that I’ve let build up because of my nerves. His other hand comes up, skimming his fingertips down my jaw. “You’re adorable when you’re nervous,” he says. “I like that. ”
“I’m sorry,” I blurt, but before I can get another word out, he leans in and kisses me.
And even though this is the second time that his lips have been against mine this day, I realize that what he did to me before could not even be categorized as a kiss. In fact, I’m not sure that any other man’s lips touching mine—and there haven’t been that many—could have even been considered a kiss.
I’m not sure if it’s the softness with which he first touches me, or the way that my lips seem to follow his when he opens his mouth to let his tongue slide in, but every nerve, tendon and muscle in my body seems to fire hot with pleasure. The contact is so explosive, so richly captivating, that I immediately feel like I’m drowning in a sea of desire.
I’m completely embarrassed that at the first touch of his tongue to mine, I moan loudly into his mouth and my arms snake quickly around his neck to pull him closer. For a woman who just proclaimed not two minutes ago that I wasn’t ha**ng s*x with him tonight, I sure as hell want to strip na**d and climb on top of him right now.
Alex’s arms come around me tighter and our mouths move more insistently against each other’s. My fingers slide into his long hair and I marvel for a moment how soft and silky it is. Then Alex’s mouth breaks away from mine and he runs his lips across my jaw and down my neck, the stubble of his chin causing electrical sparks to fire across my skin.
I feel so hot and needy, and I want him to go further. To hell with what I just said down in Alex’s car, I want to have sex with Alex—right this very minute. Mentally urging his hands to move, to explore, to strip, I almost beg him out loud to do those things to me.
Almost, and I’m glad I don’t, because Alex ends up being the sane one of the two of us, and he pulls away from me with a frustrated sigh and a whole lot of heavy breathing.
Leaning his forehead against my temple, he says, “God, I could do that all night. ”
“I couldn’t,” I grumble and he lifts his head to look at me in curiosity. “I mean…I couldn’t just kiss all night…I’d want to do other things,” I say quietly as I close my eyes in mortification.
“Hey,” Alex says softly as he grasps my chin with one hand. I open my eyes and look into his, noticing that he actually has a circle of dark gray right around his pupils. “Don’t be embarrassed by that. There’s nothing more that I want to do at this very moment than to—”
He breaks off quickly, and releases his hold on my face. Picking me up slightly, he moves me off his lap and sets me beside him. Turning toward me, he slings one arm across the back of my couch and runs the other through his hair.
“Sutton, I want you badly and had you not just told me a few minutes ago that we weren’t ha**ng s*x tonight, you’d better be damn straight I’d be f**king you right now. But I’m respecting that and we’ll get there whe
n we get there. ”
“You could have had me tonight,” I tell him cautiously, part of me hoping he’ll take that as an invitation and will start kissing me again. I’d capitulate in a heartbeat if he kissed me the same way.
“I know,” he growls low. “I felt it…that kiss was…”
“Yeah, it was, wasn’t it?”
“So f**king good,” he says and the way his words rumble out of his lips causes tremors to race up and down my spine.
“The best,” I murmur, embarrassed slightly to admit that, and I hope that’s not a turnoff in any way.
“The best,” he agrees and my heart melts a tiny bit because he actually sounds humbled by it.
We stare at each other a moment more and I can feel a buzz of energy actually start to build around us while we get lost in each other’s eyes. Alex can feel it too, and suddenly it feels dangerous to be this close to each other. He stands abruptly and says, “I probably should get going. I think we both know what’s going to happen if I stay. ”
I stand up behind him and practically have to clamp my hand over my mouth to stop myself from saying, “Oh, to hell with it. Let’s have sex. ”
Instead, I follow Alex to the door, suddenly a bit shy now that we’ve pulled away from the coziness of the couch. But he doesn’t let me stay shy for long because when he reaches the door, he spins on me and pulls me into his arms, hugging me close. It’s endearing, the way he’s choosing a comfortably intimate embrace rather than a lust-filled kiss to say good night.
“Will you watch me play while I’m gone?” he asks with some trepidation.
Pulling back so he can see my face, I tell him, “Absolutely. I’ll be screaming for you here in my living room. ”
“I’ll call you after I get back to the hotel after our game tomorrow night,” he tells me, then leans in softly to place a feather of a kiss to my lips. I’m beyond warmed by the fact that Alex is being such a gentleman, and completely mortified that I don’t want him to be.
Which makes me curious.
“Where did that prick go that I met that first day in my office?”
Alex’s eyes cloud just a little, even though he gives me a smile. “He’s probably still there, Sutton. I’ve been a prick far longer than I’ve been charming. You’re seeing a new side to me, but you know the old is bound to come out. ”
I c**k my head to the side and say, “We all have days when our monsters come out, Alex. You’re not going to scare me off if I see yours. ”
“I’ll be careful not to show you my true monster,” he quips as he steps out of the embrace.
Turning to reach for the doorknob, I lay my hand on his arm gently. He stops and glances back at me.
“I’m serious, Alex. You won’t scare me…I’ve seen a lot of stuff. ”
“I’m not worried about scaring you. I’m worried about hurting you,” he says with a haunted look on his face. “But not enough to warn you away. The bastard part of me is okay with you taking that risk. ”
“Always painfully honest,” I murmur as he opens the door and steps across my threshold.
“Always,” he says as he turns toward me to shut the door. But he gives me a smile and a wink, and it lightens the mood. “Lock the door behind me. ”
“Okay. Safe flight tomorrow. ”
Then he’s gone.
I lock the door dutifully and shuffle my way back to my bedroom, checking my email briefly on my iPhone. I’m startled when my phone buzzes with a text from Alex.
Sitting in your driveway, wishing I hadn’t left.
My fingers type furiously back to him.
Me too. I’m so bad.