Chapter 8
“Doctor Karen Arianne! Graduate of Io! You have been summoned before me to answer for crimes most foul!”
A voice like quaking gravel reverberated around the massive space. Across a moat with fountains of molten silver, on foundations of polished volcanic rock, buttressed by bronze effigies of massive animals and decked in twisting baroque gilt, standing on a pyre of tree-sized crystal beams awash with spiralling waterfalls of decomposing mercury composites, sitting on a throne fashioned from the facade of the cathedral of Reims of ancient Earth and flanked by gigawatt lasers burning the passing seconds of a thousand space timezones into falling shards of newly smelted aluminium pouring from an artificial lightning storm above, was the Rector.
Or more specifically, The Ambassador for the Acting Rector of the Arts and Humanities Trust Council Advisory Board Under- Under- Committee. Wondering if she could be heard at all against the wall of sound, Arianne set her translator to its most refined 30th Century Space-Patois.
“Oh most glorious Rector, it ain’t me what did it.”
“Silence you wretched unaffiliate!”
Lightning bolts burst from the sky, disintegrating an Onhian shriek-wolf chained to the upper tower of the cathedral-throne. A hatch opened and the smouldering ashes were replaced with a new shriek-wolf.
“I reckon I’ve got a bang-up spiffing blinger of an alibi.”
Silence fell and Arianne could see the Rector’s implant light blinking under his ear.
“Ah. Right. Terribly sorry, you’re here for the investigation?”
“Yep.”
“Let’s start this again.”
“Oakiedoak.”
Laser power sent falling sheets of aluminium flying to form a briefly-glimpsed CAFCA symbol, which promptly exploded into a silver shards and buried themselves into the marble meters away from Arianne’s feet. A howling wind blasted the Rector’s voice into her face.
“Doctor Karen Arianne! Graduate of Io! You have been summoned before me to investigate crimes most foul! The mighty Central Academic Funding Council Administration commands you to render your assistance in investigating the murder of Professor Alice Golden.”
A volley of genuine Egyptian sarcophagi erupted from tungsten cannons and shattered above her head, and would have crushed her but for the gigantic birds that swooped from the darkness above to carry off the pieces. Arianne cupped her mouth and shouted.
“I know.”
“Silence you wretched unaffiliate!”
Lightning flashed. A hatch opened and the smouldering ashes were replaced with a new shriek-wolf. Thunder rolled below the deep voice of the Rector.
“You are also ordered to help reveal a conspiracy against the Administration.”
Arianne was so stunned, she almost failed to lean into the rising gale. Black hail began pummelling the ground around her and a serpent the size of a space-freighter darted out of the boiling sky.
“This is now the tenth murder of an evolutionary culturalist!”
Chapter 9
“Huh?”
“I said, This is now the tenth murder of an evolutionary culturalist”
“An evolutionary what?”
“Culturalist.”
“You mean someone who studies cultural evolution?”
“Yes.”
“Right.”