Chapter 37 The Placement
Spit Fyre was snoring loudly beside the fireplace. Alther had tried to get the dragon back to Septimus's room, but Spit Fyre's last growth spurt meant that there was no way he could fit up the stairs. Luckily, Septimus had found the half-chewed remains of How to Survive Dragon Fostering: A Practykal Guide and had managed to decipher a soggy Sleep Suggestion, which to his amazement had worked.
Jenna, Septimus and Beetle were now in the middle of a grisly task. They were collecting the smashed ShadowSafe and removing from each piece an assortment of boneshuman bones.
"I thought we did some weird stuff at Number Thirteen, Sep, but this is something else. D'you do stuff like this every day?" Beetle was painstakingly taking apart some curved pieces, which had been at the top of the ShadowSafe, and were turning out to contain a full set of rib bones.
"No, not every day," Septimus replied with a grimace as he extricated a long thin bone from a narrow section that had formed one of the corners. "But this is the last Thursday of the month, Beetle, so what do you expect?"
Beetle handed yet another rib to Jenna, who was laying out the bones on the floor. "You do this every last Thursday" He caught Septimus's smile. "Oh, ha ha, Sep. Nearly got me there. I make that fourteen now, ma'am. "
"Jenna," corrected Jenna. "Call me Jenna, Beetle. "
"Oh. Sorry . . . Jenna. Well, that's fourteen ribs so far and there are still some more in here. Look how neatly they've been fixed inside. They're so well hidden that you'd never know. Not in a million years. Ah, here comes another onefifteen. "
"Mm, lovely. Thanks, Beetle. "
"Anytime, ma'amJenna. "
Jenna surveyed the gruesome collection, carefully laid out like a bizarre jigsaw puzzle. There, on Marcia's best Chinese rug, the shape of a human skeleton was slowly forming, as Septimus and Beetle handed her a succession of bones.
"How much have you got there now, Jen?" Septimus asked after a while.
"Well,"Jenna tried to remember what she knew from her Human Anatomy lessons at school"there's almost two arms, and, um,eight fingers, no thumbs yetI don't think so anyway. There are lots of little bones but I don't know where they go, maybe in the wrist . . . there's one whole leg still missing and no skull yet, thank goodness. "
"Aha," Septimus said grimly as he pulled out a long thin section from under the upturned sofa. "I think leg number two is in here. "
"This is so weird," muttered Beetle, as he handed Jenna a succession of small bones. She placed them carefully where she thought they belonged, then she stood up and surveyed her creation. She now had what looked like a full skeleton minus the head. Alther floated next to her, shimmering slightly and looking more transparent than usual. Jenna knew that was a sure sign that Alther was worried.
"What is it, Uncle Alther?" Jenna asked.
"I think, Princess, that this is a Placement. It's obviously an incomplete Placement, but what I'd like to know is exactly how incomplete it is. "
"I suppose we could count the bones," said Jenna. "And then, if we knew how many there are in a skeleton, we'd know. "
"But we don't know how many there are in a skeleton," said Septimus. "Well, I don't know, that's for sure. "
"Neither do I," said Jenna.
"Two hundred and six," said Beetle.
"Beetleyou're amazing. Are you sure?" asked Septimus.
"Yep. I counted them once. It was part of the test that I had to take to get the job at the Manuscriptorium. I had one minute to look at the skeleton in the cupboard. Then they muddled it up and I had to put it back togetherand count the bones. I counted two hundred, and Old Foxy told me to add six to that because there are three tiny bones in each ear that you can't see. So it's two hundred and six. "
"Well, you ought to be doing this then, Beetle," said Jenna. "You'd be much better at it than me. "
"Eurgh, no thanks. " Beetle shuddered. "Don't like bones. They set my teeth on edge. "
Jenna looked so disappointed that Beetle immediately relented. "Well, all right then," he offered. "I'll count them if you really want me to. " Beetle started his gruesome count. Five counts later he sat back on his heels and said with relief, "Finished. That comes out the same as the last one. All the bones are there. Except for the skull, of course. "
"Which will complete the Placement," said Alther.
"But why a Placement with a human skeleton?" asked Septimus. "Aren't they usually done with rats' or snakes skeletons?"
"Usually," agreed Alther. "But this looks horribly like a Personal Placementand those are lethal. "
"'Scuse me," mumbled Beetle. "But what is a Placement?"
"I'm glad you asked that, Beetle," said Jenna. "Because I have no idea either. " Beetle blushed.
"It's a Darke device," muttered Alther, floating above the skeleton, examining it closely. "A Placement is a way of gaining access to somewhere that would be impossible to get into any other way. The Wizardand it usually is a Wizard, as these things can be dangerouswill, by some devious means, get the bones of a creature taken over the threshold of the place he wishes to enter. The person who you wish to Affect must carry them in willinglyyou can't just chuck them in through the window. They must be taken in piecemeal, and when the last bone, always the skull, crosses the threshold, the creature reassembles itself and then does whatever task it has been sent to do. It is virtually unstoppable. But a Personal Placementwhich has to be human bonesis one of the nastiest Darke devices of all. One touch from the Placement and the Intended is deadand worse than that, they then spend a year and a day in Turmoil. At least when I became a ghost all I had to do was sit in that ghastly Throne Room for a year and a day . . . but to be in Turmoil for so long . . . that's terrible . . . terrible. " Alther shook his head.
Septimus felt sick. "The Intended is Marcia, isn't it, Alther?" he whispered.
"I would say so, Apprentice. You know, I just don't understand how Weasal could do this"
"Do what, Alther?" The purple door suddenly swung open and to everyone's surprise, Marcia breezed in, her Shadow slipping in behind her. Marcia was carrying what looked like a large hatbox. "Aagh!" she yelled. "That wretched, wretched dragon. Oh, I don't believe it. "
"Marcia," Alther said very calmly, "you have a Placement in here. I need to know what is in that box. "
"What are you going on about, Alther? Septimus, take that pest of a dragon down to the courtyard. He's not staying inside a moment longer!"
But Septimus did not reply. He ran at Marcia, pushing her back toward the door. "Get out, Marcia. You've got to get out of here. "
"Septimus, what are you doing?" said Marcia, pushing Septimus away. Septimus gave Marcia a violent shove and the final piece of the ShadowSafethe large round Stopperfell to the floor and smashed. Everyone stared in horror as a white skull bounced from the shards and rolled toward the bones lying on the floor. It took no more than a few seconds for the head to be reunited with the body.
The Placement was Complete.