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“You’ve been training,” I said.
“Not really. ” By her shocked expression, she hadn’t expected her strike to land, and now she was looking faintly horrified by her own violence. But Tegan didn’t let it sidetrack her from her grievance. “I can’t believe after everything we’ve been through, you just took off and didn’t tell me. Do you have any clue how worried we were?”
“I was coming back,” I said guiltily.
“We didn’t know that! Your mother has been crying off and on for two days. Two days! What’s the matter with you? Don’t you understand how much the Oakses love you? If the Tuttles had survived, there’s no way I would … would ever—” And then Tegan broke down, tears trickling down her cheeks.
I hugged her because I didn’t know what else to do and whispered, “I’m sorry. I am. ”
“Don’t tell me. Tell Momma Oaks and Edmund and Rex. ” Tegan speared Fade with a hard stare next. “And you. I’d think you would know better. Deuce has all the natural instincts of a wild partridge but you had a family once. Why did you let her do this?”
He shuffled, and it kind of delighted me to see him so nonplused. Finally he mumbled, “You try stopping her from doing something once her mind is made up. ”
By rights he could’ve blamed the colonel, who was behind all of this. It was to his credit that he just accepted her anger without excuses. We had hurt the people who cared about us, and it didn’t matter why. Time to make amends. The colonel could wait.
It took two hours of eating, explanation, and constant apology before we were forgiven. In the end, I think my family was just so glad to see me back and alive that they couldn’t hold on to the anger. Plus, when Momma Oaks saw my swollen nose and two black eyes, her maternal sympathy got the best of her. She fussed at Tegan for picking on me, which I found hilarious.
But my mother wasn’t happy when I said, “I have to go see the colonel before she sends somebody to haul me in. Tarrying could be grounds for her deciding not to honor our deal. ”
Edmund was saying, “What deal?” with a worried look as I hurried out, Fade close behind me.
We found Colonel Park in her usual spot, poring over the maps that tracked Freak movements nearby. “I take it you’ve seen some action in our absence,” I said.
She shrugged. “Nothing we can’t handle yet. Do you have my data?”
I handed her the packet, then repeated Dr. Wilson’s warning.
From her narrowed eyes, she thought I was making up the obstacle, until she broke open the seals and started reading. Then her frown became a scowl but I saw the worry lurking underneath. When a warrior came up against a foe that couldn’t be defeated under existing conditions, it was genuine cause for alarm. If her men found out how poorly equipped they were to face the horde, discipline would break down. Yet I sympathized with her position. She couldn’t strip the town of all defenders and go on the march, leaving the place unprotected. The colonel was between a rock and a hard place, right enough.
“What was it like in Winterville?” she asked, surprising me.
I guessed the reason behind the question right away. “Unnaturally quiet. I’m guessing they had twice the population before he spread the potion. Fade and I only saw three souls while we were there … most were hiding, I gather, due to the problems in the south. ”
With a weary sigh, she set the information aside, bowing her head. I saw the moment she decided to abandon the idea, choosing not to sacrifice her own people. I liked her better for it too. “Then this was a waste of time. I suppose you want to address the men now. ”
I inclined my head. “I held up my end of the bargain. ”
“Let me gather them for you. But don’t blame me when they laugh you off the platform. ”
Nerves fluttered in my stomach. This was the real beginning of our resistance. I felt it in my blood and bones, but it could also end before it began. Talking had never been my specialty; I was good with weapons, not words.
“You can do this,” Fade said softly.
At his faith in me, I squared my shoulders and followed the colonel out. She led us to the training yard, where she stopped somebody and said, “Gather all the men except the sentries. ”
It took a while to muster soldiers from the far corners of town. By their mien, they were annoyed at being dragged from their duties. Soon enough those looks would be turned on me.
The colonel climbed up on the platform that she used for addressing her troops. “The messenger from Salvation has a few words. Please give her the same attention and courtesy you’d offer me. ”
My stomach lurched as I climbed up. I was alone up here, and they’d think I was just a stupid brat, being absurd and presumptuous. Dryness prickled in my throat. Then I spotted my family in the back of the crowd, eyes focused on me. Oddly Momma Oaks seemed proud and Edmund was nodding. They had no idea what I was up to, and they still thought I could succeed.
I pushed out a breath and raised my voice to carry. “Some of you don’t know me. I’ll keep my story short. I come from the underground tribes, a place so dark that you can’t even imagine. I had never seen sunlight until I was fifteen. But I came to the surface and I survived when everybody told me it was impossible. ”
A rumble greeted those words; plainly they doubted me. I ignored it and carried on. “I found people who wanted to kill me in the ruins of Gotham. Girls didn’t fight in the gangs … but I did. And I survived. I made a friend out of one of those savages and brought him with me. ”
Stalker met my eyes and jerked a nod, his scars in sharp relief compared with the smooth faces around him. I took courage from his anger. This time I wasn’t sure if it was for me.
“We only had stories of safety to the north. It should’ve been impossible for us to find help in such a vast wilderness. There were Muties everywhere, and we had no maps. Yet we did. Longshot guided us to Salvation, and they took us in. I fought for them with my last breath, but it wasn’t enough. They sent me to fetch aid, and I was too late, too slow. That haunts me. ”
I had no fancy words to persuade them, only the truth of my life. So I dug into my pocket and produced my bloodstained playing card. “I’m called Deuce, and I take my name from the two of spades. I’m telling you now, from the things I’ve survived and the places I’ve been, that there is no such thing as impossible. According to everyone else, I shouldn’t be here. But I am. ”
The yard was deathly quiet, and the soldiers had lost their irritation. In some faces I read incredulity and amusement. Others were merely listening. One man tapped his foot.
I gathered the last of my nerve and concluded, “It’s only a sure defeat when you stop trying. We need an army who fights for the whole world, not one town, and I mean to raise it. Your colonel has given me her blessing to recruit from your number. If you join up, from this point, your loyalty will be to this cause only. Step forward, brave souls. It’s time to do the impossible once again. ”
two
onus
He saw that the creature was a tremendous wolf, rushing straight at him.
—George MacDonald, The Day Boy and the Night Girl
Absurd
When my speech ended, I hoped for a massive outpouring of support. I gave them everything I knew to be true, and in return, most didn’t even take the time to laugh at me. They went back to their duties and their old routines. Feeling like a fool, I hopped down from the platform, my stomach a knot of embarrassment and shame.
One soldier said, “This is absurd. I can’t believe the colonel thought this was worth our time. That girl can’t even defend herself from a punch in the nose. ”
Humiliation cascaded through me. My story meant nothing to them. They probably didn’t believe me, and that was a fresh pain. Nobody had mistaken me for a liar before.
Once the training yard cleared, a few people lingered. I eyed them with caution, wondering if they meant to pick a fight. But as I stepped closer, I recognize
d them: Morrow, Spence, Tully, and Thornton. Every army has a beginning, no matter how humble. Wary, I picked a path across to them.
“What can I do for you?” I asked.
“We’re in,” Tully said, speaking, I presumed, for all of them.
“Why?”
Thornton wore a grim look. “I’m an old man, and I have no family left. I’d rather go out fighting Muties than from some ailment nobody can figure out how to cure. ”
“We like to live dangerously. ” Spence exchanged a look with Tully that I didn’t know how to interpret. But it didn’t really matter why they were joining up, only that they could fight, and I’d seen them in action.
“And you?” I asked Morrow.
“At heart I’m a teller of tales,” he said. “And this looks like it might be a good one. ”
That could be entertaining in the field, and I already knew he was good in tough situations. So I inclined my head. “I’m waiting on word from Winterville. We’ll give them time to make the journey, then head out. So you’ll want to rest up. ”
“Yes, sir,” Tully said, and she didn’t seem to be sarcastic about it, either.
“I’ll send word the night before we march. That’s all. ”
It seemed odd to be giving orders to people who were all older than I was, but I figured I’d get used to it. With Fade at my side, I went across the yard to talk to Edmund and Momma Oaks. I could see in her eyes that she was scared for me, but her mouth was smiling. That looked like love to me, when you put a brave face on your heart breaking because it was what the other person needed.
“There are other towns,” Edmund said bracingly.
Momma Oaks nodded. “These men just don’t have enough imagination to grasp what you’re trying to do. They’ve been following orders too long. It will be different elsewhere. ”
In my heart I wasn’t too sure of that but I appreciated their support. “There might be some men coming from Winterville. ”
“What was that like?” Edmund asked, fascinated.
He seemed almost as interested in my stories as I had been in his, early on. As we walked, Fade and I took turns explaining what we’d seen and learned. Both Edmund and Momma Oaks marveled over the electric lights and windmills and Freaks being kept in cages. Tegan and Stalker accompanied us, listening to the account.
Stalker stopped me outside the Oakses’ house. I hoped this was about repairing our friendship, but judging from his expression, it probably wasn’t. This square structure without a hearth for cooking made me sad. Momma Oaks would never be happy in Soldier’s Pond; they’d taken away her life’s work, much as Salvation had done to me, but at least she was safe.
“Go on inside,” I said to Fade and my folks.
They did, after Fade gave me a meaningful look.
“I hear recruitment didn’t go as well as you hoped. My opinion, you went too soft. You appealed to their better natures. You should’ve called them cowards lacking the spine to take the fight to the Freaks. That would’ve motivated more of them. ”