He hissed out a breath, clearly in full approval. “Flip over, gorgeous. I’m going to make you do that again.”
Normally, she would’ve made a joke, a tease, something to lighten the situation and take the pressure off because she was a one-orgasm kind of girl, but she couldn’t find the words. If he wanted to give it his best shot, by God, she was going to let him.
She turned over, strangely unself-conscious about baring herself to him in that way, and gave herself over to the moment.
Bring it on, Dorsey.
chapter
SIXTEEN
Finn’s head, body, and brain were going to explode. Subatomic particles. That was all that would be left. Every part of him had been screaming for relief since Liv had set that plate of cookies in his lap. But once he’d gotten her into the pool house, all he’d wanted to do was savor. The girl he’d known had grown into a bold, sexy, blessedly unashamed woman.
All lush curves and bronze skin and teasing smiles. Every inch of her begged to be kissed, licked, stroked, bitten. He’d wanted to feast on each bit laid out before him, have the taste of her on his tongue forever. Had wanted to hear those breathy, needy sounds she made when he put his mouth on her. But hearing her lose it, feeling her body grip his fingers, and now seeing her on her hands and knees waiting for him, all sense of patience or savoring the moment had left him. Instead, a wave of violent urgency rumbled through him like an earthquake.
His hands trembled with the force of it as he gripped her hips. He’d promised to make this good for her, but he wasn’t sure he could make it gentle. All he knew was that he wanted to hear her fall apart again, and he wanted to have it happen when he was deep inside her. He wanted to go over the cliff with her.
Taking in a deep, steadying breath, he positioned himself behind her and eased forward, watching her body open for him in the most beautiful, erotic way. The view and instant feel of her heat around him was almost enough to make him go off like a virgin, but he exhaled through it, using every bit of willpower he possessed to maintain his control. He’d once stayed up four days straight with no sleep and little food to do surveillance. He could handle this. But the oh-God-yes groan from Liv almost did him in. He loved that she didn’t hold anything back. Loved that she owned her pleasure.
He closed his eyes and seated himself deep, determined not to rush it even though her body squeezing his cock made every other sensation he’d ever felt in his life feel worthless. His fingers dug into her hips, probably leaving bruises, but he couldn’t let go. He dragged in another breath.
But when she rocked against him, begging with her body in a slow, teasing slide, his resistance shattered. He yanked her against him again, enveloping himself in her heat, and his hips pumped of their own volition. One. Two. A million times wouldn’t be enough. The feel of her was going to drive him mad. “Fuck, Livvy. I can’t go easy.”
She glanced over her shoulder, her hooded gaze giving him the go-ahead before her words. “Then don’t.”
The words were like fire licking up his spine. Screw patience. He did his best to angle just right for her, but he was beyond finesse. All the pent-up frustration he’d had since that first kiss on the restaurant deck morphed into pure, feral need for this woman. He took her hard as she made gritty, back-of-the-throat sounds that said she wasn’t minding at all.
“Touch yourself,” he commanded between panted breaths. “I want to feel you come around me.”
She groaned and braced herself on one elbow while her hand slipped between her legs. Just the sight of that almost sent him past the point of no return. This was the image that had popped into his mind when she’d teased him this morning about indulging, too. Liv taking what she needed, showing him what she liked.
“Oh, right there,” she gasped when he angled downward. “Oh.”
He ate up her words, but she wouldn’t have had to say anything. He could feel the reaction of her body. Tightening. Tightening. A vise grip. His eyes were going to roll out of his head and across the floor. “Liv.”
“Finn!”
His name coming out in a desperate cry was the last straw. As she went over the edge again, he plummeted after her in a free fall. His hips pumping, his brain buzzing, and his release emptying in her with a force that made his knees go weak.
After few long, blissful moments, she collapsed onto her belly, taking him with her, both down for the count. He draped over her back, his fingers slipping from her hips, and panted like he’d run a marathon.
For a minute, he couldn’t move and was sure he was probably smothering her, but just when he was about to ask her if she could breathe, she let out a voluminous, satisfied sigh. Like she’d just had the best meal ever.
A laugh escaped him. A not-so-subtle one.
She reached back and slapped his thigh. “Don’t laugh at me, Dorsey.”
But her muffled, face-in-the-pillow words only made him laugh harder. She smacked him again, but soon she was laughing along with him, the whole bed bouncing.
“Hold on. We’re going to dislodge things.” He grabbed the base of the condom and slipped out, rolling off her and tossing it into the trash before turning back her way. She had stopped laughing but was still facedown in the pillow, all that bronze flesh and silky dark hair on display. He mapped her spine with the tips of his fingers and traced the delicate flower tattoo on the back of her neck. “Sorry I was a little, uh, quick there at the end.”
She turned her head on the pillow to look at him, a lazy smile on her face. “You know I wasn’t judging you on your stamina, right? Anything I got out of it after round one was going to be a bonus.”
He smirked. “Ironically, this is probably how our first time would’ve gone back in high school, too, only in half the time and I wouldn’t have had a clue what to do with my mouth.”
Her eyebrows lifted. “Mr. Big Man on Campus? I thought you’d had practice.”
He propped his head up on his fist. “You assumed that. I was a virgin, too.”
Her lips parted, and then she narrowed her eyes. “Liar.”
“Nope.”
“But I saw you with that senior chick here at the lake sophomore year. She was all over you.”
He put his hand to his chest in faux wistfulness. “Ah, Leigh. She gave me my first hand job and a painful lesson in why you shouldn’t let a girl with fake nails handle your business when she’s been drinking.”
Liv snorted. “Ouch.”
“Yeah.” He noticed goose bumps popping up on her skin so he dragged the wet blanket from beneath them and tossed it on the floor. Then, he grabbed the dry quilt and draped it over them. “After that, I fooled around a few times, but I didn’t let anything go far.”
“How come?” she asked. “Didn’t feel ready?”
“Oh, I felt ready the first time I saw Mila Kunis in That ’70s Show. But my dad had given me a talk in junior high about women trying to trap the guys who are going somewhere. He told me that once girls saw I was good at football and had money, they’d try to latch on and even get pregnant so that I had to keep them around.”
Liv made a disgusted face and rolled over to prop herself up on the pillows. “Geez. That’s a shit thing to say.”
“Yeah, extra shitty considering my mom got pregnant with my older sister in high school. Like he wasn’t an active participant in that and it was her fault.” He frowned, old bitterness bubbling up. “But at the same time, the thought freaked me out. I didn’t want to get stuck in Long Acre.”
“So if I had asked you to sleep with me, you would’ve thought I was some scheming chick from the wrong side of the tracks trying to put my claws in you?”
He gave her a yeah-right look.
“What? There’s no denying that we were from different sides of town.”
“I would’ve never thought that of you. First, I pursued you. Second, no one wanted to get out of
town more than you did. I would’ve been an anchor on you, not the other way around. But I never pushed because you deserved better than losing your virginity with a guy who was too chickenshit to date you publicly.”
A little line appeared between her brows. “Is that why you kept us secret? Because if your dad found out, he would’ve seen me as a leech?”
“Partly.” Finn flipped to his back and scrubbed a hand over his face. “He saw us together once. That day I invited you over when I thought my parents were going to be out overnight. My dad forgot something and had to come back to get it and saw us kissing by the pool. The next day, he cornered me and told me what he’d seen.”
“Damn.”
“Yeah, the things he said, the way he talked about you and your family… I’ve never come so close to punching my own father. But he threatened to take everything. My college fund. My car. Any support after high school if I didn’t shut it down.” He stared at the ceiling and blew out a breath, anger building in him anew. “I should’ve let him. I should’ve stood up for myself. For you. Instead, I let him think he’d won and got more careful with you.”
Liv shifted to her side and peered down at him, her damp hair tickling his chest. “You were a kid. He was your dad. You can’t blame yourself for being scared your father would disown you and throw you out. My parents had a lot of sway over me, too.”
He stared up at her, old shame filtering through him. “I wanted to tell him the real story of where I was during the shooting, but he was so proud to call his son a hero and I just…let him. It was easier to let him think what he wanted.” He closed his eyes. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have given a damn about his opinion. I was a coward.”
The words felt jagged in his throat, but it felt good to finally say them to her, to admit what a selfish asshole he’d been.
When he opened his eyes, instead of seeing disappointment on her face, she bent down and kissed him lightly. “Stop apologizing. You were seventeen, and every kid has a part of them that wants to make their parents proud. Even if your dad’s a dick.”
“That’s being kind.”
“Okay, an überdick. But that’s not news. I once overhead him refer to my dad as the illegal who does his lawn.” Finn cringed, but she smoothed his forehead with her fingers. “Part of me knew all along that you could never bring me home. To be honest, I doubt my father would’ve been overly thrilled with me bringing that ‘rich asshole’s’ son around either.”
“The difference is you would’ve done it anyway.”
She shrugged, conceding the point, and the quilt slipped down a little. “Well, to hell with them both because here we are again anyway. Doing unspeakable things to each other.”
He traced the edge of the quilt, revealing the top curve of her breast, and watched goose bumps rise on her skin as his fingertip brushed over her. “Still in secret, though.”
She smiled, letting her hand slide under the quilt and over his abdomen, and then she laid her head against the crook of his shoulder. “You’re not my secret. You’re an old friend who I might be having some naked fun with for the summer. I have no desire to hide that unless you do.”
He gathered the quilt around them both, loving the feel of her, skin to skin. “No, I agree. No hiding.”
“Good.”
He let his fingers play idly in her hair for a few minutes, his brain working, his gaze on the ceiling. “I’m supposed to visit my parents on this break.”
“Yeah?”
He let out a sigh. “It’s one of Billings’s and the psychologist’s directives. I haven’t been home in years, and when I called my mom to let her know I was off assignment and okay, she cried. She got me to promise I would stop by, and she’s been texting me.”
“Hmm. You sound really excited about that.”
“I’ve been thinking of a hundred ways to get out of it,” he admitted. “I don’t know how to…be around them anymore.”
She was quiet for a moment, her breath soft against his chest.
“I guess that makes me sound like a heartless jerk,” he said finally.
“No, I get it. You’ve been through a lot, and family can be…intense. But you can’t break a promise to your mom.” She traced her fingers over his hip bone. “I’m sure she’s been worried. And I know it’s going to sound trite, but I wish my mom was still around for me to visit and get annoyed with.”
His lungs contracted at that. “God, I’m sorry. I didn’t think—”
“Don’t. That’s not why I’m saying it. I’ve had a lot of years to get used to my mom being gone. All I’m saying is don’t lock out the rest of your family just because you and your dad don’t see eye to eye. Life’s short.”
He let out a long breath, the words sticking to him with a thick layer of guilt. She was right. He knew that. But it didn’t make the idea of visiting them any more palatable. He didn’t know how to be part of a family anymore—particularly his. He would probably make things worse rather than better by being there. “Maybe you could come with me?”
The question popped out before he could evaluate the repercussions.
Olivia tensed in his hold. “Uh, are you drunk on afterglow? You want to take me to see your parents? Maybe not the best icebreaker. Hey, Dad, remember that girl who did your lawn? The one you didn’t want tarnishing your precious son’s reputation?”
He frowned. “I don’t give a shit what my dad thinks at this point. In fact, part of me wants to stroll in there and lie, tell him we’re going to elope or something. But you’re right. I don’t want you to go someplace where you’re uncomfortable. And I couldn’t promise that my parents wouldn’t make you feel that way.” He pulled her closer. “Sorry. I’m not sure where that idea came from.”
She was silent for a long moment, and he thought maybe she’d dozed off, but then she let out a sigh, one that drifted over his chest with a warm gust of air. “If you want me to go, I’ll go.”
The offer made his breath stall. “No, I wasn’t thinking—”
She lifted herself up and gave him a shut-up-and-listen look. “I said I’ll go. You’re helping me with stuff. I’m helping you back. And I can handle whatever dirty looks your dad throws my way. I might tell him I’m pregnant with your triplets. I give exactly zero shits about his opinion of me.”
He smiled. “Zero shits?”
“Exactly zero.”
He pushed her hair behind her ear. “You’re kind of amazing, you know?”
Her eyes flickered with some emotion he couldn’t pinpoint, but it was gone almost as quickly as it was there, making him question if it had been there at all.
“I know. All the boys tell me that when I’m naked.” She pecked him on the lips. “Now get out of my bed so I can get some sleep.”
He chuckled. “Kicking me out already?”
“Yep.”
“And into the rain, no less. I feel so used.”
Her mouth kicked up at the corner. “You should. I used you well. But I can’t share a bed. Sleeping quirk. All guests must exit by midnight, or I turn into an angry pumpkin.”
“I’m thoroughly terrified.”
“I can tell.” She rolled off him, pulling the quilt around her. “But maybe I’ll let you have breakfast with me tomorrow and help pack my camera gear for Kincaid’s blog shoot.”
“I’m honored.” Finn sat up, hearing her teasing tone, but seeing the seriousness in her eyes. She wasn’t kidding. She didn’t want him staying overnight. Usually that was his move. He didn’t do sleepovers either, but getting kicked out felt a little different than being the one leaving of his own volition.
He wasn’t going to push, though. They had boundaries. This was a friendly hookup. Not let’s play like we’re dating. That was important. He wanted to spend this time with Liv, and goddamn did he want her in his bed again, but his one nonnegotiable was that he wouldn’t hurt
her. Pretending this was something that it wasn’t would only tangle up what could be a fun respite for them both.
He climbed out of bed and pulled on his boxers, liking how she watched him. “Tonight was great.”
“It was.”
He hoped that was the truth for her, that she wasn’t regretting anything. Liv was generous by nature, and she’d known how long it’d been for him. He didn’t want to be her charity case. He turned to face her. “I just want it to be clear that this isn’t some binding contract. I know this wasn’t the plan. So just tell me if you need me to back off, and I will. Us doing this once doesn’t mean I have any expectations that it’s how things will go while you’re here. Hopes but no expectations.”
She gave him a get-over-yourself look. “Once again, I came on to you, so maybe I should be giving you that speech. No pressure, Dorsey.”
The suggestion was ludicrous enough that he had to fight not to laugh aloud.
“Right. Like I wouldn’t want to do that again. And again.” He sniffed. “Have you seen you?”
She grinned at her words being thrown back at her. “I have, and I am spectacular.”
He stepped around the bed and went in for one more kiss. “Understatement of the year. Now, get some rest. You’ve got pictures to take tomorrow.”
She nodded and settled under the covers but stayed propped up on her elbows. “I’m thinking you in those boxers—or out of them—will be a good subject.”
“Ha. Keep dreaming. I’m a strictly behind-the-scenes guy.”
“Shame.”
He shook his head and grabbed the rest of his stuff off the floor. There were no neighbors close, so walking to the house in his shorts wasn’t going to cause a scandal, and he was just going to get rained on again anyway. “When’d you get so dirty-minded, Arias?”
She arched a brow and tapped her temple. “It’s always been there. You have no idea the filthy things I did with you in my virgin mind back then. If only you’d dated me for real…”